AithneSilver

Ok, go to the search function and type in the word "freebie". Go to one of the gazillion places it recommends. This will get you something that looks pretty much human unless it specifically says otherwise. You do not need any $L to look halfway decent in SL: but others are right, the really good stuff does cost some money. It may take a long time to find something you really like: but there are thousands of options for free looks. Also you can browse the marketplace for freebies (things that cost 0$L). Make sure you're using a classic avatar: the free mesh avatars that come with your account can't wear any clothes besides the ones they came in. You can change the shape of your classic avatar right in your appearance menu. Also, if it's the lack of movement that's bothering you, you can add physics to your avatar in the appearance menu as well. Experiment a bit and find something that works for you, or change your shape and look every day: whatever you want.

The truth is, that it's likely on their end not yours. Tell them to make sure that they have "show other avatars" checked under graphical settings (strange to say, some viewers don't have it checked by default): and that they are using a mesh-enabled viewer. Otherwise they'll see you as a floating nametag (since you're wearing an alpha mask to hide your classic body). If they are laggy, or their viewer can't handle mesh that well then there's likely little that you can do: although spreading out where stuff is attached can help. Also cut down on the number of HUDs and scripts that you're wearing at any given time as these cause major lag. But again, it's probably their graphical settings or their viewer (or both) which are the problem: not you.

If you plan on switching to a mesh body, then I would suggest only using freebie or lowbie shoes for now: and make sure they aren't meant for mesh (it'll say either mesh and classic, or just classic). You can get these at freebie stores and they will fit avatars of any size. The trick with nonmesh shoes is that you need to wear the foot shaper (it'll be accompanied by an icon that looks like a shoe) along with the prim attachments. You'll find this piece in the box with the shoes but it may not be called what you were expecting. Right click on that item and choose wear from the dropdown menu. Then attach the prim shoes. Some shoes use an alpha mask instead: this hides your normal feet and the shoe takes it's place. This is most common with boots which also cover a portion of your leg. In these cases, wear the alpha mask (accompanied by an icon that looks like a shirt made of graph paper) first then attach the prim shoes. right click on this item then choose wear from the menu. Then attach the prim shoes. With these shoes you may need to edit their position if your hover slider is a bit higher than normal. This should take care of your problem.