Ok, here is an out-of-left-field thought.
RL males playing SL females (well) are ideal matches for RL males looking for SL females to have adult fun with. Just keep RL info out of it.
-Very likely, both the "Female" and the male are looking for the same thing
-Since both are RL males, they are visually stimulated and have a high probability of not wanting the relationship to stretch into RL
-The "female" has moods and responses that will be uncomplicated by male standards so therefore misunderstandings are probably less and the whole Mars-Venus thing is avoided.
This also gives a break to RL females who come to SL and get annoyed at being treated like sex objects in sometimes very crude terms.
Of course, what messes that all up is a certain negative reaction from many SL males when they discover their playmate and fantasy companion is in RL also a guy.
The human condition seems to always seek out that -one- fly in the ointment :-)
Personally, I have no problems with people in SL presenting as what pleases them the most - but if someone were inclined to use SL as a dating service for RL, I can see where they would have issues .....