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Amanda Crisp

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Posts posted by Amanda Crisp

  1. So I was talking to a RL friend in a messaging client outside SL while within SL, I was in a Roleplay-sim.

    In the Roleplay, I was typing for a non-player-character (I was a moderator) who’d been blackmailed into seducing someone by Very Bad People.

    Just about the time I was posting the big “close the deal” line (suggestive would be putting it mildly) - I was stricken by WWS (Wrong Window Syndrome)

    I ended up laying probably the most graphic suggestion I’ve ever thought up in my LIFE on my unsuspecting RL friend…..

    Awkwardness ensued…….

    Yes, that was embarrassing……

     

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  2. Once upon a time the SL forums were a flame-fest to rival Twitter. That got very old, very fast and I stoped visiting.

    I have *issues* with the way potentially contentious themes are sometimes locked pre-emptively under the current management, but I have also not encountered “total despair of civilized conversation” either and have remained here for a long while.

    I look at it like this; people who MUST flame and belittle others can Tweet and Post away on other platforms.

    I’ll go with what we have here for as long as things remain civil 🙂

     

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  3. Hopefully this is not Necroposting, but my situation has evolved since I replied last week and I thought it might be of interest to those with concerns about Club Staff in SL.

    To whit; Guests who “Game” contests very nearly convinced me to hang up my headset and make SL photography my hobby after doing the DJ thing for not-a-few years.

    As was mentioned previously, many DJs put up 1000-2000 lindens per contest, lease a stream to pipe music into SL, buy music and maintain a wardrobe to perform in (especially for Themed contests). Right now I do 3 events a week; so you see how it adds up.

    So, enter the Alts….

    They show up, enter the contest and vote so that their Puppetmaster wins. This greatly annoys genuine guests who are there to also socialize. The Alts do NOT tip and effectively de~incentivize the regulars, meaning that revenue goes away as well.

    Over time, many efforts to -prevent what is essentially Cheating from taking place. Some are technical, some are behavioral and none of them work terribly well because the Regulars get less staff attention while the Alt Policing takes place.

    I don’t DJ to be the Contest Police 🙂 I DJ because I love music and socializing …

    I’m looking at an alternate format to keep DJing without the frustration of the contest gamers ( contestants are fine; the people who try to game the system however are an issue)

    Anyway, not complaining really, just providing real look at the inside of how events are run, financed and the challenges of doing that even if profit is NOT the goal.

    Even in a virtual world, people are people and not all people like to play fair.

     

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  4. On 1/2/2022 at 3:40 AM, TaraSimone Sixpence said:

    At the outset I am well aware that many here will disagree with me, some vehemently. This is your right to do so and I respect it. 

    Having been in SL for many years, as a designer and scripter, for the past few years I have decided to follow my real love of music and dancing within SL. There are some very good clubs and DJ's out there and some really horrible ones. This is obviously a matter of music taste. However, since I am kind of a music freak and love SL dancing on my huds with my dance sequences, I visit clubs fairly often. When one does not like the DJ or the music you just TP out. It is simple, easy and that is that. (And i will say if the DJ's voice is not pleasing, it may be a good idea for the DJ not to talk at all and just use chat.)

    Now, with all that being said, there has become an incredibly annoying habit and absolute turn-off at many of the clubs where the following is done:

    1. DJ's remind people to tip the host and venue every other set of music (1,2,3 songs). 
    2. Hosts remind people to tip the DJ and venue every 5 minutes.
    3. Automated Messages go out every 10-15 minutes reminding people to tip.
    4. "Help keep the lights on" has become a favorite line in almost all clubs.
    5. DJ's telling people all they work for is Tips, is called "panhandling" in the real world and it is just that. And this line is often used at many clubs.

    It has come to the point where all this is becoming ludicrous. I see nothing wrong with putting out tip jars and signs. That should be enough for people. Those who will tip - will do it. Those who will not tip, won't. Simple as all that. 

    I have spoken to quite a few long-time friends in SL and I was surprised that they, almost all (will say 99%), agreed with me. As time goes on the situation is becoming impossible and also irksome to the extreme. Though you may not be aware of this - DJ's, Hosts & Club Owners - people TP away just because of this incessant begging!

    Let us be clear here - and possibly brutal:

    Club Owners:

    1. Club owners - The cost of running your club is something you have taken on. This should have been calculated into your expenses. A designer who cannot sell clothing, closes down. A scripter who cannot sell their objects, closes. A builder from whom no one buys - closes. Or they stay open because they love doing it - no matter what losses they incur. Why are clubs different? Nothing legitimizes begging people to contribute to a club. And I will add most clubs in SL have seem to have gone into the "land business" as well. If you cannot make it - if your expenses are too much - then close. 
    2. I once discussed this with a club owner. So I said to them "If you want to take money from people - then charge them to come in. Use a 24 hours pass (easily scripted), a huge group charge or whatever method you want." (I was obviously goading them into the answer I expected.) This came immediately: "If you charge people - no one will come." VOILA!!! So what is the genius work-around? Drive people crazy "begging" or trying to "guilt" them into tipping every 10 minutes? 
    3. One other small point. A lot of lag in clubs is due to the incredible amount of scripted signs and objects dedicated to begging for tips.

    DJ's:

    1. No one is forcing. you to DJ. No one in SL is putting a gun to your head. If you want to DJ, then go for it. But that does not mean the public is expected to pay for your desire to DJ. 
    2. Put out a tip jar (or use the clubs tip jar). If you cannot resist the urge, then mention it once or twice in a 2-hour set. No more. 
    3. Telling people to also tip the host and venue - again that is just not only ludicrous - it is annoying as hell. 
    4. A DJ has a computer system with their songs, usually a Stream, the SAM (as it is known) and that is that. I hate to say this so brutally, but it does not take a PhD to run these systems. DJ's by themselves have ample time to do all the hosting, greeting, playing that is needed.
    5. But such systems cost money! Yes the do! So figure out if you can afford it before you begin. Don't rely on avatars to pay for your desire to DJ.

    Hosts:

    1. I am not sure why, how, or when "hosts" became mandatory.
    2. However, I do understand many will disagree with the above point. So the Hosts are there - everywhere. Which in essence of the "panhandling" system doubles a tip once a visitor is guilted into it. It is a hidden "cover charge" if you want to put it into real terms. 
    3. Hosts greet, make jokes (if they can), and dance. They try to keep conversations going. Wonderful! Until the 5-10 limit comes up and the begging for tips starts. Venue and DJ. "This DJ is working very hard for all of you....etc." "This club is the best! Help us stay open and keep the lights on!" Sound familiar? 

    Bottom Line:

    1. I tip only when I have come to know a DJ and/or Host and like their music and presentation. I, nor anyone else, needs to be reminded every 5 minutes to tip, or that someone is "working hard" or that "the lights need to be kept on" or that "you are only working for tips." Does a waiter come up to you in a restaurant, hands you the menu, and says, "Before I take your orders, please remember I am only working for tips."?
    2. Under no conditions will I tip a venue. That is their choice, their responsibility, their expenses. If they are renting out land or other things, it makes it even more ludicrous. Maybe a course in Excel and rudimentary costs and expenses will help all the club owners - since what they want is to be on the top of the "numbers list" which they want me to pay for.
    3. It is legitimate to "charge" for entertainment. But you know if you do so in SL, no one will pay. That should have been a consideration before you opened up your club. 

    Please Stop:

    1. Stop the never-ending begging for tips (and it is begging.)
    2. Stop the lines about "keeping the lights on" and "I only work for tips".
    3. Stop the incessant automated messages sent to chat by a scripted message system for people to tip.
    4. Stop the mentions of how hard you are working. Most of the people listening work very hard for their money as well.

    Please Do This:

    1. Put out your tip jars.
    2. Mention them once or twice in a normal 2-hour set (if you feel you absolutely must do so). Do not make them part of your normal conversations.
    3. Hosts, do the same, since hosts are now a mainstay, and I doubt an argument for eliminating them will do any good.
    4. Get rid of the "help keep the lights on" line or anything like it. It truly is disgusting and annoying.
    5. Work hard, supply good music and people will tip you just as much without TP'ing away because they are just disgusted with the "panhandling."

    Yes this is my rant after 13 years in SL. I love some of the clubs I visit. I love certain dance creators and very specific dance huds. Some DJ's are excellent. Some are horrible. Your choice. Your taste. But no one should be subjected to this constant panhandling or begging so often. It makes one just stay away from those clubs, and possibly SL in general.

    --End of Rant--

    Some thoughts from a DJ:

    01..SL is global and for many residents, tipping is not a custom they encounter in RL so an occasional reminder that tipping allows the DJ to purchase new music and pay for the stream they are enjoying is probably a practical item. Reminding to Excess is an issue.

    02..None of the venues I work at pay me. Its all tips and since I actively solicit requests (and therefore buy music to fill them - I don’t Rip) I generally always spend more to entertain than I make in tips.

    03..I spam for tips for my host once an hour. Generally the Host does the same for me.

    04..Nobody puts a gun to anyone’s head and makes them toggle their music on to listen to a DJ’s stream.

    05..I am just as glad to get a 10L tip as a 500L gratuity. I appreciate that someone was having fun and thought  it was nice enough to tip for. Times are hard in RL and money does not come easy, so the thought definitely counts.

    06..Moderation in all things is usually the best path 🙂

     

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  5. 20 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

    We had a giant train wreck of a thread a short while ago on this very subject, so generally I don't want to rehash it.

    I have begun to wonder, though, if people getting upset at being "looked at" (or having their gf looked at) aren't engaged in something a little bit like RP. Not consciously or deliberately, but reacting in an overly dramatic way because it feels "immersive" and "real." Like a scene from a bad teen movie, or Taxi Driver. And maybe some men (and doubtless some women) think it makes them look "gallant" and "protective" (and pretty damned possessive, too) to "defend the honour" of their partner?

    Just idle thoughts. Anyway, I'm glad this worked out well for you! Nicely handled!

    A sad offshoot of this is when SL women IM males whose target cursor lands on or near them and ask/order/demand that the cursor be moved “because my boyfriend is very jealous and will accuse me of cheating”.

    I’m not sure what bothers me more; the “Property Rights” mindset of the boyfriend or the woman who enables him.

     

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  6. On 1/13/2022 at 11:46 AM, Lucia Nightfire said:

    So, the Web team yesterday reaffirmed  the Lab's desire to offer Premium Plus this year.

    As this thread's title says, "What are your 'Must Have' features and what are you willing to pay for it?"

    Please answer both and please keep the thread on topic.

    Thanks.

    [01]..Real / Actual “Hide global presence”

    [02]..Group messages that work reliably

    [03]..The ability to Partner more than one other avatar

    [04]..A Pegasus

     

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  7. On 1/17/2022 at 7:21 PM, Chic Aeon said:

    I was about to start putting my personal thoughts on paper -- well virtual paper anyway, but then I stopped to reflect.  I know I am not alone  in the "Please, please, make it stop" outlook concerning the preponderance of events.  But, is there an equally stalwart contingent that have hunkered down in the trenches waving "We Want More!"  ? 

     

    I just counted approximately 250 events listed on Seraphim, most of them occurring weekly or monthly, That is close to 4,000 events (super sloppy in my head math but you get the idea) events per year.  Some are large, some small; a few (I can think of only two really) that I look forward to when they come around twice a year.

     

    I find I don't really care much any more. The possibility of finding something I really like at an event has decreased over time. These days I am better off exploring some well-made sims and inspecting the stylist's choices.   I now only look at a very few weekend sales. This past Saturday I bought two things and featured nothing.  Still, that may just be ME. 

     

    So give me some input here guys. What would you like to see happen to events?  I know a lot of very talented creators whose incomes are WAY down and who make very little profit on events these days. These folks toil more with less reward. This can't go on forever.  

     

    You’re talking Shopping events?  I am a dance club DJ and *I* was about to agree with you 🙂

    So far as targeted shopping in SL, I do much better by looking at my RSS feed that’s set to collect info from any number of Fashion Divas whose I follow. Going to the shopping event is something I do when I’m bored :-)

     

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  8. I use that section to remind myself of significant life events that person is undergoing. This lets me avoid seeming insensitive in conversation by referencing the notes saying: “going through divorce”, “RL spouse passed”, “very bad arthritis- types slowly but not being inattentive” and similar.

    I talk to a LOT of people in SL as a DJ and in general. Little reminders help me be respectful.

    This was a habit that carried over from RL where I wanted to make sure I remembered any significant situations related to the people entrusted to me. It always helps to remember those birthdays, weddings and significant life events. Especially if the note was “child passed away today 10 years ago” and the right move is not to “coach someone about taking to long on the break patio” but instead to just go sit w them.

    Sometimes taking notes is not for the purposes of dehumanizing people as data; but to acknowledge shared humanity.

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  9. On 12/9/2021 at 6:35 AM, Nick0678 said:

    Amanda you are replying to Sarastip who hasn't logged in since 2017, my dear.

    Not all mobile browsers/screens render Boards completely or “above microdot” outside of the main thread content 🙂. Since I work a bunch, I am posting from my mobile about 80% of the device.

    This being the case, I generally respond to whatever the forum places prominently  and hope it’s chronological-order :-D

    If it costs me Cool Kid Points, I’ll have to take the hit :-)

     

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  10. On 6/15/2014 at 8:03 PM, sarastip said:

    I just joined Second Life today out of curosity. I know that role play is a big part of second life. But is second life only role play? Is everyone on Second Life role playing all of the time or are there places where people are expected to be themselve and not playing someone else?

    Second life really has no “enforced identity” areas so asking those uncomfortable and potentially privacy-invasive questions is up to the individual.

    Having said that, is there really anywhere on the internet that one can verify another’s details w 100% confidence?

    Governments still send information and extend voting privileges to dead people, so this probably has a way to go.

    My advice is always that if “real” matters, Facebook might work better than SL.

    If you discount all the “alt” accounts on FB of course…

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  11. 2 hours ago, Nick0678 said:

    Wait by pixeling you mean SL pixelsex? I was talking about Skype sex where you at least get to see the real person, don't tell me that in 15 years being together you didn't do that!

    My only experience with such a long term relationship was when one of my SL ex's told me she's been with some dude in SL for 8 years until he died... but 15 years without ever touching the other persons hand or smell, kiss each other? WOW! It really is something unique..

     

     

    Forum oldies have heard this before from me :-)

    I’m one of the fortunate ones Second Life allows to “simulate being normal” despite an annoying physical challenge 🙂

    As a lifelong runner and fitness-nut, I was “blessed” with an atypical early-life stoke.

    It wasn’t horrible; I still raised two children, have a career and even a very physical side job (to pay for raising two children)….but one of my lasting “deficits” is that when tired, stressed (or even in the Mood) I can do a very good Elmer Fudd / Drunk impersonation.

    ”Thouch my nithplz” is just NOT sexy talk 🙂 

    In my RL work, I’m the one rehearsing for the morning Zoom-call so I can be understandable (my duty shift is an overnighter so I’m very tired by meeting time).

    I’m not shy about being open about this, because my *hope* is that I can encourage people like myself to make use of SL to fill some of the empty spaces that our physical challenges create.

    My relationship with my SL Partner is important to me. The emotional reality of love lasts longer then the human body can sustain the *act* of love; so I do not feel shorted 🙂

     

     

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  12. 1 hour ago, Nick0678 said:

    For 15 years you 've been having cybersex with the SAME person? WOW!

    i can't keep doing that more than 20-30 times with the same person even if they are begging me during our video chat..

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    I like to think we have a little more going for us as a couple than *only* Pixeling 🙂

    But yes, her brain is dead-sexy 🙂

    But its the fact that I have someone who - after 15 years of sharing our most private thoughts - still chooses to be with me anyway….

    ….that’s what makes me all warm inside 🙂

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  13. 15 hours ago, Lindal Kidd said:

    My previous post was intended as humor. In point of fact, I've been happily married for over 30 years now. It's my first, last, and only marriage.

    That’s awesome!

    I’ve managed to stay partnered to the same typist in SL for a little over 15 years; which is three times longer than Real Life worked out 🙂

    Not having a “log out and cool off” button for RL hampered things…..

     

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  14. On 12/3/2021 at 2:23 PM, Lindal Kidd said:

    It's never too early to get divorced.

    I am a big believer in emotionally committed relationships - so don’t take what I am about to say as a put-down on staying with a person (or persons) because they are special to you and there are no “ties that bind” holding anyone hostage….….…..but….

    ”Why is divorce from a legalistic marriage (that has a “senior partner” and a “junior partner” so expensive?….

    Because its worth it……”

    (( If for example you live someplace where your Husband has to sign financial papers related to Real Property along with you because…he’s the husband, he’s in charge of you and very much aware of that…. Like…where I lived….))

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