In another thread Freya Mokusdi (hi, we met IW some time ago), wrote, in part, "Finding someone' is the hard part. Unfortunately in my experience that tends to be SECOND to 'finding somewhere'...In my experience it takes a long time to connect with people/a group of people before genuinely interesting offers start turning up. You have to know what to look for, what to discard, and who to run miles and miles away from." I don't understand. There are hundreds of BDSM sites. Most of them you arrive at some sort of store, I understand these sites are expensive, but even trying to find the BDSM part is a challange. When you arrive there, you may find several people milling around or some actively involved in a scene and you say "Hi" to those not playing. If you do get a response, and many don't even bother with a simple "Hi", that's the end of the conversation. Attempts do drag out a conversation are fruitless and the other person just wonders off. Don't even bother to ask anything about the site because they are reluctant to say anything. I have an alt whom I got into a BDSM Femdom Prison where he sat for almost 6 weeks without play. We are all there for the same play and I don't understand the hesitation.