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pleasuring vs. dating?


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Just curious... if i would just pleasure someone once, can you actually call that "dating"? 

I have noticed some people use the word "dating" alot, like "i was on a date last night". But if its only a one night stand, how can they be dating then?

I know the term "dating" has many senses, but usually i dont say i am dating unless i want to meet the other person more often. Its more like a courtship to me, to get to know eachother and things like that.

Or how would you define "dating"?

 

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Well to me its plain and simple if im "dating" that means myself and that other have agreed on that and are actually seeing one another. However on the other hand I have also met the "ones" who seem to think if you spend one night with them that they are suddenly dating you, The amount of guys I have literally had to say look it was a one nighter, enjoy the memory and move on, and the reason why I don't want to see them again is, well there is no click there, so to speak. I know of a few guys and women who lead people on too, by adding them to friends for example, that in itself is pointless if it a one nighter, so if you find that you are saying things like "yeah baby that was fun, see you soon " i suppose some could possibly take that as a come on and think that they are dating you , however i always make it clear, if im up for fun , i say it , wont add them to my friends list, i think you have to be clear on what you want  and expect.

Demi

 

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If you just pleasure someone once, that 's hooking up. You could also call it a hit-and-run if it's with someone you plan to never see again or contact. Dating is a relic of a bygone era. I refer you to the website Hooking Up Smart:

Hooking up has replaced traditional dating on college campuses, and has also become prevalent in the general population and culture.  The hallmark of hooking up is the clear understanding between both parties that the encounter will be free from any expectations for further contact.  It is designed to avoid the possibility of commitment.  However, hooking up is still the primary pathway to a potential romantic relationship.

 

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For me, there's a difference between going on a date, and dating. Going on a date means you're going out with a (potential) romantic interest. It can be a one-time thing. It might end up as a "hook-up." Dating, on the other hand, is more long term; it means you've been out on more than one date, and you consider the other person to be your (current) romantic partner, and have more dates with them in the fufure.

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danicah wrote:

Just curious... if i would just pleasure someone once, can you actually call that "dating"? 

If you pleasure them enough so that they want to come back and have you do it again, then yeah, that could be considered dating.  If you don't, then that's just considered a damned shame.

...Dres

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I think it's contexual. I could say 'I'm dating', meaning I am playing the feild e.g. going on several single dates with different people or more than one with some but nobody really steady. On the other hand I could say 'This person and I are dating' which would signify an ongoing thing. Still for me, even if I am 'dating a person' I make no assumption that it is exclusive unless explicitly understood by both of us and made perfectly clear, and I would sure hope they wouldn't jump to that conclusion either.

Hope that's clear as mud :P

I don't deny friendships just because I don't plan on seeing them again romantically, but that's an individual call I guess. Just for myself, if I'm not interested in at least being friends, anything else is entirely out of the question.

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"I went on a date last night" sounds more socially acceptable than, "I met up with my F'k buddy last night." Maybe that's why.

 

To me, 'dating' means a committment, but is not on the same level as 'in a relationship'. If you're 'dating' several people, to me - it's called 'seeing'. When you're 'dating' - you've narrowed your 'seeing' choices down to one, but haven't taken the finalization step of 'in a relationship' yet. Just my view.

 


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Wow that's really interesting Senobia, because for me it's exactly opposite. Seeing is the more commited state for me whereas dating is the feeling out process, even if it's narrowed down to just one person.

kinda like this order...

Dating

seeing

going steady

engaged

married

Momicidal/suicidal

Dead, hospitalized or institutionalized

;)

 

I guess it's just really important for people to communicate and not make assumptions, huh?

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Eileen Fellstein wrote:

Wow that's really interesting Senobia, because for me it's exactly opposite. Seeing is the more commited state for me whereas dating is the feeling out process, even if it's narrowed down to just one person.

kinda like this order...

Dating

seeing

going steady

engaged

married

Momicidal/suicidal

Dead, hospitalized or institutionalized

;)

 

I guess it's just really important for people to communicate and not make assumptions, huh?

Where does psychopathic fit in?

...Dres

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danicah wrote:

Just curious... if i would just pleasure someone once, can you actually call that "dating"? 

I have noticed some people use the word "dating" alot, like "i was on a date last night". But if its only a one night stand, how can they be dating then?

I know the term "dating" has many senses, but usually i dont say i am dating unless i want to meet the other person more often. Its more like a courtship to me, to get to know eachother and things like that.

Or how would you define "dating"?

 

thats just casual sex which can come from being on a date or in the club bathroom hehehehe..

dating with someone is just that..open to set up more dates with each other..

steady is a relationship..then engaged and married and then finally divorced..then back to the club to see how rusty you are from all that time off from the casual sex lol

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Dresden Ceriano wrote:


Eileen Fellstein wrote:

Lol, it might be that point after it's over when you seriously consider starting again!

I think you're confusing psychopathic with delusional.

...Dres

Not at all. Dellusional is thinking it might work if I dun it a little different. Psychopathic is knowing damn well it wont work because I already tried a dozen times, then doing it anyway

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Eileen Fellstein wrote:


Dresden Ceriano wrote:


Eileen Fellstein wrote:

Lol, it might be that point after it's over when you seriously consider starting again!

I think you're confusing psychopathic with delusional.

...Dres

Not at all. Dellusional is thinking it might work if I dun it a little different. Psychopathic is knowing damn well it wont work because I already tried a dozen times, then doing it anyway

You could always go the schizophrenic route and date someone that's not really there.

...Dres

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Dresden Ceriano wrote:


Eileen Fellstein wrote:


Dresden Ceriano wrote:


Eileen Fellstein wrote:

Lol, it might be that point after it's over when you seriously consider starting again!

I think you're confusing psychopathic with delusional.

...Dres

Not at all. Dellusional is thinking it might work if I dun it a little different. Psychopathic is knowing damn well it wont work because I already tried a dozen times, then doing it anyway

You could always go the schizophrenic route and date someone that's not really there.

...Dres

Honestly it was just a one-off. I was just 'pleasuring' the ice cream bar

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One night of pixel humping doesn't equate dating in SL. Now two nights of pixel humpery...now THAT does equate dating in SL. Three nights of carrying on like that, and you're engaged. Four nights, and you've knocked her up and you'll have to go out and buy one of those talking baby hud thingies. If you've still stuck around, then you better plan a wedding before the pixel nugget starts getting bigger.

Don't listen to me. I'm jaded, and I haven't had any coffee yet o.O

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Eileen Fellstein wrote:


UncommonTruth wrote:

Lmfao @ pixel nugget :smileylol:

hehe can I get that as a super sized value meal with large fries and a big ole 'nilla shake?

If you procreate with a Lycan, then you'd get a 12-pack super-size fo sho'  o.O    OMG I been playing SL too long LOL

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This is my read on the subject... I have a rather old fashioned definition of dating... a "date" happens when someone asks you out and you accept, they plan an activity or excursion to be shared.  Dating is more traditional and suggests a bit of courtship, pursuit, etc.   It does not mean you are having sex with the person but it doesn't exclude that possibility either.  Dating does not imply exclusivity, i.e.. You can date more than one person at a time without being a **bleep**, I think "Dating" to me means more of a social interaction vs. sexual.  

Of course "being on a date" can be a euphemism for many less innocent activities in SL or RL.  If you are "pleasuring" or "hooking up" then to most people that would be a bit beyond "dating" - its either casual sex or the next step if you are seeing them frequently.   However,  the key is to be honest with your partners, if you are not looking for a relationship let them know, right away and be honest about what you are looking for.  Don't friend a casual hook up if you never want to see them again, but if you meet someone you would like to connect with just tell them you like them and you would appreciate their company on a casual basis... (i.e. you can't demand their presence whenever you are both online - but if you are both free would enjoy their company)

 

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