Jump to content

Searching for a Just-SL-Lover....-Relationship....


You are about to reply to a thread that has been inactive for 3289 days.

Please take a moment to consider if this thread is worth bumping.

Recommended Posts

After a lot of drama for months where always RL got mixed with SL...I am tired of all this.

I wanna have fun and I want to try to keep my SL separated from my RL.

RL is hard enough sometimes and I don´t want that drama ingame too...cause otherwise SL seems to be more problematic than real life.

Anyway...If there is someone..somewhere..who wants the same, please let me know.

We should enjoy  SL and I want that from now on.

Looking forward to meet you.:0)

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

A few things I've noticed over the last 5 years in SL...

A high percentage of those that are "available" in SL are also looking for that RL connection. If you weed those people out in your search, then a very high percentage of those that remain are going to be in a relationship with someone in their RL. If you weed those people out then your search may be the equivelant to looking for a needle in a haystack.. SL-only individuals who are sane, who don't roleplay their relationships, and who are not in a RL relationship with someone are one of the rarest types of people in SL. If you don't rule out those who are in a relationship in RL , then you'll need to make rules for yourself regarding that that you cannot break, or make peace with it somehow. Part of growing as a person involves taking a step back and doing a self-check from time to time, and life inside SL is no different. Best of luck and I hope you find exactly the person you're looking for, because they *are* out there.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I would think with even an SL relationship, you would eventually be interested in the person's RL.

"Who is this person I am hopping in the prim bed with?" "What do they look like?" "They seem really wonderful, they must be beautiful or at LEAST attractive in RL"

 

I guess many would know not to go there cause the person who is causing you to fall in love might be something horrific like a old guy with a colostomy bag, no teeth, and no hair. And here you imagined prince charming!

 

With all the lonely SL'ers, one would think anyone who WANTS a relationship would have many choices? Sure things don't work out but once again... choices

Link to post
Share on other sites

meow :matte-motes-bashful:

Good luck to you :)  RL or SL, the same things happen, even if they dont care abotu RL at all, it ends up being no different, and things get messy and emotional, etc. 

If i told you how many people i have been through, and all the crazy drama it would depress you to no end :) Personally, i would stick to shopping friends or find a sister that you can go hunting with, thats a lot fun :matte-motes-evil:

 

 

Link to post
Share on other sites


MoiselleErin Teardrop wrote:

I would think with even an SL relationship, you would eventually be interested in the person's RL.

"Who is this person I am hopping in the prim bed with?" "What do they look like?" "They seem really wonderful, they must be beautiful or at LEAST attractive in RL"

 I guess many would know not to go there cause the person who is causing you to fall in love might be something horrific like a old guy with a colostomy bag, no teeth, and no hair. And here you imagined prince charming!

With all the lonely SL'ers, one would think anyone who WANTS a relationship would have many choices? Sure things don't work out but once again... choices

I clearly don't have to be beautiful in RL to attract people in SL. I've done it. I have vitiligo and by summer's end look like a famished spotted cow. I have a lovely SL friend who has a colostomy bag in RL. I know at least a couple great guys with little to no hair, a woman who wears dentures and another who needs oxygen. Their minds are sharp, their humor is warm and they are a delight to be with.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Good luck with your romantic search, Sonja.  I have no doubt that what you are after can be found in SL, but you can have fun without the relationship drama, too.  I have to agree with Madelaine on this one - if you really are after an "SL only" relationship, then it doesn't matter how old, young or healthy the person is away from their computer - what race, sex or gender your online 'friend' is in real life.  That leaves you a LOT of options. 

Best of luck,

Cinn

Link to post
Share on other sites

finding a sl relationship is hard trust me that is all i found and the ropes slip although i have made it i find that rl will get into the way. my rl sister also has a sl relationship and i find her relationship very rocky due to rl issues with her husband. keep in mind she isnt dating her rl husband is sl. :( but i am single in rl but taken is sl. and i guess im fine with that fact due to roleplay and let ur sl lover know that other wise there is no sl or rl connection (because an rl connection will be needed to know at least who you are dating lol) good luck to you and enjoy your search..

Link to post
Share on other sites

 I feel your pain  Sonja. Been there and done that and wish I had just an SL relationship with those of the past.  I believe everyone has a right to privacy . If that person doesn't want to share their real life with you then they don't have too. And mixing RL with SL doesn't always turn out wonderful and they call this "  Second life " for a reason. You got your first life and you got your second life It really shouldn't mix in my opinion.

Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't know how well you can keep your RL out of SL, at least as regards a relationship. Given that a relationship is going to involve very personal feelings, you are going to have to involve your real life because it's your real you that is the depository for those feelings. I do think (and Dana said it better) that there are people in SL who can and do have very good relationships in which each partner has a very good understanding of the other's RL, but no extension of things to RL is intended or expected.

I've never had a 'relationship' in SL as the term is commonly understood. But if that ever did happen it would be with someone who had a fairly complete understanding of who and what I am in RL.

Link to post
Share on other sites

My interests are boxing, racing, hanging out, meeitng new friends, playing pranks with my huds, exploring, and other things.  apologies for the late responce, had to find the post again :D.  If i had people to hang out with i would be in game more as well.  What have you done here so far?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Good luck to ya --- just relax, hang loose, go dancing, chat, have fun---there's someone out here in sl looking for the same thing --- but know when to let go, and don't beat the dang "relationship" to death.  I find excitement in the hunt, the chase, and the lovely seduction when the magic is there --- lasting anywhere from a few days to a few months. :matte-motes-bashful-cute-2:

Link to post
Share on other sites

Me too -

\Anyone got an answer to this--

 

 I gave my girlfriend my password so she could make some adjustments.

 I logged out and the next day i logged back on. The palce i logged abck into was a store selling skins shapes etc -- I dont log out from there it  was either my girlfriends palce or somewhere else but not that store.

She says she didnt use the passworfd and dump me at the store

 

its a amtter of trsu and she says landing at the store was a flike - I cnat see how that can happen.

 

Commentsa and advice welcome

 

Link to post
Share on other sites

Sorry if I'm off base here, but it looks like you got taken.  It happens.  I learned never give your password to anyone, unless you change it right away again.  Even then, they could take your money in a couple of seconds.  You think the person you trusted wouldn't do that kind of thing, but there are some pretty good con people circulating in sl and you can be taken in.

I stupidly made a group with myself and my then bf and gave him equal right to property etc.  Bad idea.  There was a misunderstanding whereby I thought I was invited to something with him on a specific day and he never showed.  I pointed it out to him that night while he was still offline.  The next day I logged in to find the very expensive house we bought together, and everything I had bought to put in it were all gone.  The land was deserted.  He did not give me any compensation for anything, just left me a very short terse message.

I will never give anyone my password or privileges in a group I own.  Unless you know that person really really well in RL as well as SL, I would not trust anyone I met in SL with the ability to take any inventory or change any of my stuff.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...


Dana Hickman wrote:

A few things I've noticed over the last 5 years in SL...

A high percentage of those that are "available" in SL are also looking for that RL connection. If you weed those people out in your search, then a
very
high percentage of those that remain are going to be in a relationship with someone in their RL. If you weed those people out then your search may be the equivelant to looking for a needle in a haystack.. SL-only individuals who are sane, who don't roleplay their relationships, and who are not in a RL relationship with someone are one of the rarest types of people in SL. If you don't rule out those who are in a relationship in RL , then you'll need to make rules for yourself regarding that that you cannot break, or make peace with it somehow. Part of growing as a person involves taking a step back and doing a self-check from time to time, and life inside SL is no different. Best of luck and I hope you find exactly the person you're looking for, because they *are* out there.

Love the animated forum avi Dana :)

I could really relate to your response as this has been very close to my own experience here in SL. In fact, I was just thinking about starting a topic on SL only relationships when I saw this one. I'm certainly not knocking anyone that is hopeful of finding that RL connection with someone, but it's not for me, and the sad truth is that it gets very lonely and frustrating to keep telling people you are not interested in something with an eye on RL and having them walk aaway without giving things a chance here. But...I guess it's better they are honest that is what they are after.

I am in an SL only relationship now, so I'm not on the forum shopping but I am interested in knowing others with a similar approach to things. Myself, I consider this a life and a world of it's own. The fact that I can understand to some degree how the grid was created and how pixelized people are constructed doesn't matter to me. I have emotions and experiences, actions and reactions to and from others that are exclusive to this life here. They are part of what has shaped me as a person in 'this' life and also have effected those around me I'm sure.

*smiles. I'm not sure I can agree with Sonja that it makes it easier or less painful doing it this way. It doesn't for me at least. I have never considered myself to be 'playing' SL so it's not a game mentality at all. If anything, just for me, leaving the real world 'out there' while I am here can be very very painful at times. Still, I love who I am here and my life and friends and wouldn't wan't to trade it.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Eileen Fellstein wrote:

Love the animated forum avi Dana
:)

I could really relate to your response as this has been very close to my own experience here in SL. In fact, I was just thinking about starting a topic on SL only relationships when I saw this one. I'm certainly not knocking anyone that is hopeful of finding that RL connection with someone, but it's not for me, and the sad truth is that it gets very lonely and frustrating to keep telling people you are not interested in something with an eye on RL and having them walk aaway without giving things a chance here. But...I guess it's better they are honest that is what they are after.

I am in an SL only relationship now, so I'm not on the forum shopping but I am interested in knowing others with a similar approach to things. Myself, I consider this a life and a world of it's own. The fact that I can understand to some degree how the grid was created and how pixelized people are constructed doesn't matter to me. I have emotions and experiences, actions and reactions to and from others that are exclusive to this life here. They are part of what has shaped me as a person in 'this' life and also have effected those around me I'm sure.

*smiles. I'm not sure I can agree with Sonja that it makes it easier or less painful doing it this way. It doesn't for me at least. I have never considered myself to be 'playing' SL so it's not a game mentality at all. If anything, just for me, leaving the real world 'out there' while I am here can be very very painful at times. Still, I love who I am here and my life and friends and wouldn't wan't to trade it.

Way late reply on my part, and thank you :smileyhappy:

What you describe is an Immersionists perspective. Self-identifying with your AV and living a SL within the context of the grid world. The first pick in my inworld profile has a brief explanation of all 3 perspectives, and can be used as a tool to help identify the way someone approaches SL, and give major clues as to whether or not their perspective and use of SL may be compatable with your own. I say this because in SL there is an added compatability requirement, not just personalities and details getting along like in RL. couples also need to have at least similar perspectives on SL and it's use or conflicts of use, viewpoint, or context will popup and cause some pretty big issues at times. The more one is aware of the potential dating/relationship pitfalls, the better off they are, and the smarter choices they will make.

Link to post
Share on other sites

A high percentage of those that are "available" in SL are also looking for that RL

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Not here sister, unless you won the mega millions then yes iam looking...

Link to post
Share on other sites
You are about to reply to a thread that has been inactive for 3289 days.

Please take a moment to consider if this thread is worth bumping.

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...