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Advice on Role Play when RL is kinda disturbing?


carissabelle
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I love to Role Play, but sometimes its kinda hard to concentrate when my RL is home... Sometimes they just need something so i have to stand up just for a minute, and then run back to the computer. Normally it takes only a minute, so i usually don't tell people that i'm going afk.

But this sometimes happens like every 5 minutes. And i really don't want to interrupt the Role Play, or have to say "brb" all the time.

I sometimes don't even wear my headset so i can't listen to the sounds of SL. But i want to be in the Role Play.

Is that wrong? Shall i rather not Role Play when my RL is keeping me kinda busy?

Or shall i better say "brb" every 5 minutes to let them know i am afk? But they won't stop the Role Play for me. And i thik it would be embarassing if i had to pause the Role Play every couple minutes.

Would you call me something like a "Hardcore-Role player"?

Have any of you ever role played while they had to do something in RL at the same time? And how did you handle it?

(My RL doesnt play SL and not interested, so they dont know anything about what i am doing here)

 

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Imagine you're watching a movie with friends and you're eating from a little tiny bowl of popcorn that you have to run to the kitchen and refill every 5 minutes.  Add that you really don't want to miss any scene so you pause the video for each popcorn run.  While the popcorn in question would seem silly and low priority, it's somewhat parallel to the perception of your online friends who don't really have an eye for what you're doing in RL. (._.)

Really, ask the people you're RPing with.  Maybe they understand and are doing the same.  If they're already complaining, it might be a good time to find a balance in priorities.  If it were me, I would get deeply frustrated.  I don't multitask well so I tend to get things good and done before I log in to SL.  That way, I don't have to divide my attention.  When I'm with someone persistently AFKing on me, I consider spending my time with someone else. (>_<)

So, have a chat with your RP mates and expect to have to pry a bit to find their comfort levels.  RP is a two way road.  You entertain your friends who in turn are entertaining you all in a common context.  Who knows?  They may be just as busy as you are and when you AFK, they hop up to see if the cat is getting into the towel closet again.  Courtesy and common ground are beautiful things.  =^-^=

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It all depends on the kind of roleplay, the situation and the other people involved.

Much of our roleplay happens in a bar so when someone doesn't reply we just mumble something about them having fallen asleep or being drunk.

But in other situations it would be very very annoying if someone did that.

Personally I don't like getting interrupted a lot, whatever I am doing.

So I'd rather leave SL turned off till my other work is done, there is peace in the house and I can enjoy myself for  a while without being bothered.

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If you really just away for a minute every time, I wouldn't say anything at all, just get up, do what you have to and return, and try to time it until the other people you play with are posting. Or just RP when you know you'll have the time for it without interruptions. Or tell whoever this 'RL' is/are that you're busy and to do it themselves.

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Why fight and swim upstream. Play SL when the kids are in bed, when  your spouse is at work, before others are up in the morning, during your work lunch hour, or whenever you are sure not to be interrupted.

And if that means playing less so be it.

Yes, if you are sacrificing time with your family that shouldn't be - such as meals together, outings, reading a story to your kids at bedtime, etc., then yes, you are addicted and should check into that.

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I think in roleplaying world, hardcore means something else. My friend who is into roleplaying is a brilliant linux database manager in RL but he does nothing but roleplays in SL. His profile clearly states he is into roleplaying only. He sticks in RP places and never goes anywhere except when you called him out for a help.  In short, in SL his roleplay character is him. They also get easily upset when someone is not up to par with their roleplaying concept.

You probably a Roleplay enthusiast with borderline addiction but you haven't reach the Hardcore level since you get easily distracted by your surrounding. Hardcores will get into a room and lock the real world away.

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Depending on the rolpely, I'd just let the other person/people know that I'd be gone every now and then, just for a minute, but I'd still keep up with the roleplay. If they won't deal with that, find other people to roleplay with.

I occasionally have RL come up, but I do try to time it so that I'm not gone every 5 minutes. That gets a little frustrating, unless you're around para-rp'ers who can take that long to type an action or reaction.

 

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Ariel makes a good point that paragraphers might be able to work with someone who comes and goes frequently, but those of us who do more of the 'bantering' roleplay would go mad. It's nothing against the distracted typist, it's just it's hard to have a conversation with someone who's not there.

'Course that might be what an RL person says too when trying to talk to someone trying to roleplay ;)

Among the roleplay options for distractions: rush out to use the bathroom, get a call (if yer in a modern or post-modern setting, 'course), check your watch and realize you have a meeting, or just generally remember something you have to do, and put yourself aside.

>Have any of you ever role played while they had to do something in RL at the same time? And how did you handle it?

I bet that's fairly common when RL doesn't understand the pressing need to reply or interact in RP when a scene gets intense or your character gets suddently called to action. It's really hard to conduct simultaneous conversations in First Life and Second Life, and whenever I've had to do it I've tried to make the SL conversations very simple. I'm lucky to have a town drunk alt, so I can put my head down and either type ramblings or even fall asleep now and then. I'll usually break out the town drunk alt at a time when I expect RL to be distracting.

One piece of advice that may presume your situation, but try to negotiate something with your RL so the person gives up your immediate response now in favor of some time later on. If someone is pressing you to act or converse when you're obviously in an activity, they're probably making a conscious choice to do so for a reason. Might not apply to your situation; I just offer up the idea. It works out well for roleplay too; I'd much rather have the full attention of another typist for an hour than have their distracted attention for three hours.

 

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carissabelle wrote:

I love to Role Play, but sometimes its kinda hard to concentrate when my RL is home... Sometimes they just need something so i have to stand up just for a minute, and then run back to the computer. Normally it takes only a minute, so i usually don't tell people that i'm going afk.

But this sometimes happens like every 5 minutes. And i really don't want to interrupt the Role Play, or have to say "brb" all the time.

I sometimes don't even wear my headset so i can't listen to the sounds of SL. But i want to be in the Role Play.

Is that wrong? Shall i rather not Role Play when my RL is keeping me kinda busy?

Or shall i better say "brb" every 5 minutes to let them know i am afk? But they won't stop the Role Play for me. And i thik it would be embarassing if i had to pause the Role Play every couple minutes.

Would you call me something like a "Hardcore-Role player"?

Have any of you ever role played while they had to do something in RL at the same time? And how did you handle it?

(My RL doesnt play SL and not interested, so they dont know anything about what i am doing here)

 

It's almost always like this for me. I share a house with other people & it is only rarely that I'm home alone. I'm constantly being interrupted by people barging in on me, by animals wanting attention, by the phone, by people IMing me both is sl & on Yahoo Messenger, etc., etc. ... If I had a laptop (I spilled beer on the Gateway laptop I had, & ruined it) and could be in sl from my bedroom, it wouldn't be quite so bad, but I have to be on a desktop machine in the common area of the house. I get teased about sl, especially if I get "caught" when I'm with my sl bf. Speaking of whom, lives alone in an apartment and who says he understands when I have rl distractions & interruptions but in reality gets annoyed when it happens constantly. He tells me to say 'brb' when I'm interrupted and usually I do but sometimes I think that I'll only be aftc for a second & it ends up being 10 minutes or longer. I understand how this can be annoying, and spoils the mood for romance, but I simply can't help it. If I waited until I was alone and had nothing in rl that needed doing I would seldom even be in sl. So this is just the reality of the situation for some people and others need to understand this.

Jeanne

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Another option is to tell your housemates that between X and y time I'm going to be "watching" my favorite progam and unless the house is burning down, don't disturb me. They may say..It's just a game, etc..but ask them if they would like it if you came up and bothered them while they were watching a movie or their favorite TV program? The fact that you prefer to engage your mind rather than passively accept what the boob tube is feeding has nothing to do with it.

I work from home and have to put the same kind of restrictions up. I'm working, just as if I was in an office. This means I'm not available except for an extreme emergency.

If the only time you are being bothered is when you are inworld, then they are making a conscious decision to pull you away from SL.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Can you set aside some "me time" during which you can do whatever fun mindless things you want without being distracted or called away? It's hard when you have small kids who don't understand that concept, but if you have older kids or adult roommates or a spouse, they need to understand that that's important. You need to understand and accept that it's important so that you can ask for it as your right. Good luck. 

 

Or you might just want to find some slower RP. ;) I was home today and so was hubby, and we were talking to each other and getting stuff done while I RP'ed on my alt. But I never missed anything because in that sim we try hard to make careful, detailed, and descriptive RP posts. Nobody noticed that I was AFK for five minutes at a time. ;)

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