What we can and cannot control, and how it affects us.

[Ceka Cianci]

1 hour ago, EliseAnne85 said:

If I can add some things about "bad pr", not addressing your post specifically.  But, the problem on Twitter, I read, is the bots and trolls are impersonating celebrities and companies and giving out false information to make the celebrity or company look bad.  What I read, that Elon Musk wants to do, is to make all celebrity and business accounts have a monthly fee in order to know it's the real company or celebrity.  Impersonating a celebrity or a company on Social Media, I believe, is already a crime in the real world.  

LL seems to allow us a lot of freedom of expression and, imo, a very small part of SL walks on a thin tightrope of just going too far.  For me, it's the toddler looking avatar faces on the fully grown woman's body that is going to extremes.  However, I am not getting involved on a personal level.  It just bothers me from time to time as some of it is bloody, violent and frankly portraying child abuse.   There is no happy medium between me and that other than to just walk away and avoid as best I can because as, I said above, I am not LL police.  I have a busy SL and RL.  However, I feel I should have the right to express my view on that matter under freedom of speech.   And, am I going to go all gung-ho and take a stance to have those types of avatars banned.  No.  And, the reason is that I have my own life and it's not my responsibility or problem to deal with it.  I am here for my pleasure, not to be police person.

ETA: I went and looked at the video again and seen it was something about some  scam going on selling blue checks to people trying to get verified..

So disregard what's below.. I'm just going to leave what I wrote below  rather than  having this part make no sense.. hehehehe

They really should just give us the delete option back.

I thought most Celebrities paid big money for those blue checks before and one of the big reason they were all in tears because he wanted to drop it down to like $8.00 where anyone that wanted one could get one if they paid for it.

I really don't know a lot about twitter other than seeing people's tweets showing up all over the place.. But I heard just watching videos, those blue checks were expensive before.. like i said though, I don't know anything about twitter so I may have heard it wrong too..

 

Edited December 16, 2022 by Ceka Cianci

[cunomar]

19 hours ago, kali Wylder said:

Xenophobia

Is Xenophobia the right word whilst being something the overwhelming mass majority oppose ?

Seems to me the problem you describe is rather all and sundry seeking enemies where they don't exist . When someone says hello i'm (insert label here) , we are supposed to congratulate or object , its a challenge . Reply with a shrug and you obviously don't understand , your an uncaring contemptuous awful person blah blah blah . Rolls eyes tunes out and gives you a label of my own .

Live and let live means whatever works for you is fine with me , its of no concern to me , so you do your thing i will do mine and we can get along in amicable harmony regardless of our differences .

 

 

[Theresa Tennyson]

3 hours ago, cunomar said:

Is Xenophobia the right word whilst being something the overwhelming mass majority oppose.

Yes.

https://www.verywellmind.com/xenophobia-fear-of-strangers-2671881

Edited December 16, 2022 by Theresa Tennyson

[Lewis Luminos]

There are always threads in the forum about wanting things like the banning of bots, the ability to make yourself invisible to others, demands for the banning of landlors and store owners for perceived slights in customer service, and so on. I've been seeing this sort of thing since 2008 but I do think it's getting more frequent in the last few years.

As for why, I think partly its due to new people not understanding what Secondlife is or what it can do.  Whereas in the past, most new users were coming in from a gaming background and they were frustrated by a lack of visible objectives or quests, I think this has changed. Now, we are seeing more new users who are non-gamers, coming in from a background of moderated, instant-gratification social media like Tiktok, Instagram etc. People who are more accustomed to influencer-culture and cancel-culture, where fame is based on number of followers, and that doesn't fly here either.

People don't get that SL is for the most part not strongly regulated and that's intentional. It's down to landowners to regulate and moderate their own spaces as they see fit.  If you want a place where certain regulations apply, you need to buy a region and apply those regulations yourself. If you want a club where no-one goes AFK, by all means open your own club and set up a script that requires guests to respond to a captcha every 30 minutes. (I used to see these years ago on camping chairs, they are not a new thing). However, be aware that most guests are going to find such a thing intrusive and annoying, and they will likely leave rather than complete the captcha. And they won't come back.

The main thing that regulates SL is consumers.  If people don't like the way a business operates, they just stop using that business. If everyone thinks the same way, that business cannot survive and it closes down. If no-one else thinks that way, then the business loses one customer, who likely spent next-to-nothing there anyway, and the business carries on. The People have spoken.

I think we do, as a community, have a great deal of control over what happens in SL. Some of it is related to developments made by Linden Lab. An example was when the Newbrook houses were released in Bellisseria and there were a number of problems and issues with them. People raised their voices in concern; enough of them that the launch was stalled, the faults rectified and the complaints addressed.  As individuals, we don't have such power. Had there been only one person complaining about the faults with the Newbrook houses, the faults would not have been fixed. 

So if your demands are something that other SL users don't want or don't care enough about, nothing is going to happen and your options are down to either - pay for your own region with the rules you want, or swallow your pride and accept the rest of the grid as it is without that rule, or leave SL altogether. There are always choices; just not necessarily choices that include the option you want.

Edited December 16, 2022 by Lewis Luminos

[Maitimo]

Most of the things I see people complaining about or demanding action on are things that they can already control by themselves.

• An ugly build next door? Derender it (yes, use Firestorm already).
• Bots in a club? Go to a different club.
• Bots in your house? Change your land settings or use a security orb.
• Landlord took your money and ran? Learn to not pay more than a week's rent in advance.
• Someone being rude to you? Mute them.
• Store owner being rude to you? Buy from a different store.
• Ex is harrassing you? Use an alt and stay away from the places they know you go to.
• Someone broke an actual RL law? Abuse-report it.  This is the only category that Linden Lab is certain to take action on (if guilt is proven).

The problem is not that they don't have the choice, it's that they are coming from a place of over-entitlement and the choices don't satisfy their need for uptimate power.These are the people who will call a customer service line in RL and demand that someone is fired. 

[Nick0678]

11 minutes ago, Maitimo said:

Most of the things I see people complaining about or demanding action on are things that they can already control by themselves.

• An ugly build next door? Derender it (yes, use Firestorm already).
• Bots in a club? Go to a different club.
• Bots in your house? Change your land settings or use a security orb.
• Landlord took your money and ran? Learn to not pay more than a week's rent in advance.
• Someone being rude to you? Mute them.
• Store owner being rude to you? Buy from a different store.
• Ex is harrassing you? Use an alt and stay away from the places they know you go to.
• Someone broke an actual RL law? Abuse-report it.  This is the only category that Linden Lab is certain to take action on (if guilt is proven).

.. and the most important

• You don't like Second Life? Play some other game.

 

 

[kali Wylder]

23 minutes ago, Maitimo said:

Most of the things I see people complaining about or demanding action on are things that they can already control by themselves.

• An ugly build next door? Derender it (yes, use Firestorm already).
• Bots in a club? Go to a different club.
• Bots in your house? Change your land settings or use a security orb.
• Landlord took your money and ran? Learn to not pay more than a week's rent in advance.
• Someone being rude to you? Mute them.
• Store owner being rude to you? Buy from a different store.
• Ex is harrassing you? Use an alt and stay away from the places they know you go to.
• Someone broke an actual RL law? Abuse-report it.  This is the only category that Linden Lab is certain to take action on (if guilt is proven).

The problem is not that they don't have the choice, it's that they are coming from a place of over-entitlement and the choices don't satisfy their need for uptimate power.These are the people who will call a customer service line in RL and demand that someone is fired. 

I think it's a matter of perception and boundaries.  We all have the choice to control our own experience.  But extrapolating that control over my experience and wanting to impose it on everyone else boils down to expanding my boundary out towards infinity and not seeing where I end and others begin.  "I feel, think, act this way and so should everyone else".

Edited December 16, 2022 by kali Wylder
keep finding typos

[Love Zhaoying]

47 minutes ago, kali Wylder said:

extrapolating

Some of us are bad at the maths!

[EliseAnne85]

14 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

.. you can read the Twitter files in Wikipedia.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twitter_Files

 

Oh.  That is Elon Musk's problem to deal with/sort out, whatever.  I didn't get involved in the political stuff on Twitter as it was so much mudslinging.  What I feared about the mudslinging is this:  Is this how our kids are learning to communicate?  I found that a bit frightening for the kids of today.  It's causing dividing lines for them and sometimes even hate.  But, there is nothing I can do about it other than suggest schools teach good communication skills.  I don't want to be on social media for that reason, kids learning how NOT to communicate.  

[kali Wylder]

10 minutes ago, EliseAnne85 said:

Oh.  That is Elon Musk's problem to deal with/sort out, whatever.  I didn't get involved in the political stuff on Twitter as it was so much mudslinging.  What I feared about the mudslinging is this:  Is this how our kids are learning to communicate?  I found that a bit frightening for the kids of today.  It's causing dividing lines for them and sometimes even hate.  But, there is nothing I can do about it other than suggest schools teach good communication skills.  I don't want to be on social media for that reason, kids learning how NOT to communicate.  

 

1 hour ago, Nick0678 said:

Mhm. but frankly i don't care about the FTX guy, he is a citizen and i would do

the same if i knew that i 'd spend 5-10 years in prison to become a billionaire,

but what actually bothers me is how government agencies infiltrated these

massively used social apps in order to control / manipulate the masses.

I get that you two really want to talk about RL and twitter, but this is not the place to do that...

[Nick0678]

14 minutes ago, kali Wylder said:

 

I get that you two really want to talk about RL and twitter, but this is not the place to do that...

Ok but now you are doing what you said in your first post that others do, although you can simply ignore/mute these.

[Rowan Amore]

5 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

Ok but now you are doing what you said in your first post that others do, although you can simply ignore/mute these.

Or, just trying to follow the warning issued earlier?

18 hours ago, Dyna Mole said:

A quick reminder while this interesting conversation is still young:   I know it's not easy to separate SL from RL, but please try to keep the focus on SL here.

 

[EliseAnne85]

25 minutes ago, kali Wylder said:

 

I get that you two really want to talk about RL and twitter, but this is not the place to do that...

I just wanted to say some things about Twitter because I don't think the SL forum is as bad as that is!  Learning to communicate when things are out of our control is important.  Some times when others are appearing too controlling, we just have to move on.  I learned that on Twitter and it's carrying over to the way I view most of SL.  I still have a live and let live attitude plus people have their own land and we know we have to abide by their rules, so that's the other side of the coin.  Others wanting to be so controlling, I am not sure where it is coming from.  Lewis touched on an interesting point that some people may be coming to SL currently from places that are more moderated.  

Edited December 16, 2022 by EliseAnne85

[Sid Nagy]

2 hours ago, Maitimo said:

Most of the things I see people complaining about or demanding action on are things that they can already control by themselves.

• An ugly build next door? Derender it (yes, use Firestorm already).
• Bots in a club? Go to a different club.
• Bots in your house? Change your land settings or use a security orb.
• Landlord took your money and ran? Learn to not pay more than a week's rent in advance.
• Someone being rude to you? Mute them.
• Store owner being rude to you? Buy from a different store.
• Ex is harrassing you? Use an alt and stay away from the places they know you go to.
• Someone broke an actual RL law? Abuse-report it.  This is the only category that Linden Lab is certain to take action on (if guilt is proven).

The problem is not that they don't have the choice, it's that they are coming from a place of over-entitlement and the choices don't satisfy their need for uptimate power.These are the people who will call a customer service line in RL and demand that someone is fired. 

Wait a sec.... You mean SL without drama?
Nooooo.... we can't have that, can we?

[Flower Caerndow]

2 hours ago, EliseAnne85 said:

Some times when others are appearing too controlling, we just have to move on.

Perhaps this explains why there are not many people posting on the SL forums.  When well written comments comparing SL to RL get deleted and many of the ones that are allowed to remain are people complaining and demanding action the forums get quite tedious and meaningless.

Time to move on.

[Rowan Amore]

18 minutes ago, Flower Caerndow said:

Perhaps this explains why there are not many people posting on the SL forums.  When well written comments comparing SL to RL get deleted and many of the ones that are allowed to remain are people complaining and demanding action the forums get quite tedious and meaningless.

Time to move on.

And many have left since the new guidelines were implemented...We're not supposed to be discussing RL issues such as Twitter...

 

Edited December 16, 2022 by Rowan Amore

[Persephone Emerald]

1 hour ago, Flower Caerndow said:

Perhaps this explains why there are not many people posting on the SL forums.  When well written comments comparing SL to RL get deleted and many of the ones that are allowed to remain are people complaining and demanding action the forums get quite tedious and meaningless.

Time to move on.

I imagine that if some people's posts (or post of those they like reading) continually get deleted, then they will not see much point in staying on this forum.

We can't control moderation decisions, but we can control how we choose to spend our time.

Edited December 16, 2022 by Persephone Emerald

[Sid Nagy]

I notice a lot of people slowly drifting away here.
In the end LL will win the jackpot: A forum that needs no further moderation, because no one left except an occasional poster with a complaint about SL.

It is what it is. sigh.

Edited December 16, 2022 by Sid Nagy

[Orwar]

2 hours ago, Sid Nagy said:

I notice a lot of people slowly drifting away here.
In the end LL will win the jackpot: A forum that needs no further moderation, because no one left except an occasional poster with a complaint about SL.

It is what it is. sigh.

   I remember the days people used to wish for more moderation of the forums .. If only we knew then, huh?

[Love Zhaoying]

3 minutes ago, Orwar said:

   I remember the days people used to wish for more moderation of the forums .. If only we knew then, huh?

It's worth watching everyone complain, kinda!

*Edit* Or rather, watching everyone complain is kind of worth it. Either/and or both.

Edited December 17, 2022 by Love Zhaoying

[HeathcliffMontague]

My SL motto is live and let live.

Except things like should of and could of... Even "I should of ate.../I should of went there ". WTF happened  to should've, could've, eaten and gone?

We all type fast and make mistakes. I often do. But basic stuff like that kinda "low key" (as the cool kids say) irks me a little.

Not on a Tonight we all dine in hell! level, but more of a hmm... Why would you do that? I'll go back to yelling at clouds now.

[Ceka Cianci]

1 hour ago, Orwar said:

   I remember the days people used to wish for more moderation of the forums .. If only we knew then, huh?

A lot more would have had to change than someones wish..This place was hotter than the surface of the sun at times.. hehehehe

 

[Evah Baxton]

We all share the same incomprehensible base-level biases.

Humanity can only work if every element of it is set free.

If we knew love we would never feel the need to control.

[Nick0678]

14 minutes ago, Evah Baxton said:

If we knew love we would never feel the need to control.

Interesting... that sounds a lot like something Osho would say.

 

 

[Bent Luik]

14 hours ago, Rowan Amore said:

We're not supposed to be discussing RL issues such as Twitter...

twitter is real life?
I am baffled !!