jacqueline95love Posted May 18 Share Posted May 18 Hey there 😊 My name is Jacqueline. I´ve been on SL for many years on and off... I want to come back to it very soon, and i really would like to find a special someone for a (SL ONLY), open relationship. Open meaning, that we would be bf and gf, but would be allowed to continue having sex with other people. Its something i´ve been wanting to experiment for a while now. Looking for a sweet and kind guy whom i can share my SL life with. ❤️ If you´re interested, dont be afraid to contact me :) 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul Hexem Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 Is it me, or does that sound like wanting your cake and eating it too? 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AnnabelleApocalypse Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 Actually sounds waaaay more achievable in SL than a standard monogamous relationship. 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Persephone Emerald Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 3 hours ago, Paul Hexem said: Is it me, or does that sound like wanting your cake and eating it too? Cake in SL has no calories and can be re-rezzed over and over again, so there's no reason why we can't eat as much cake as we want, whenever and with whom ever we please. 9 2 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 In my observations of SL.relationships over.the years, this is how this normally goes: *It's ok for the woman to have multiple partners but not the man. *It's ok for the man to have multiple partners but not the woman. (Most prevalent) *It's ok for both at the start but then one side, who isn't getting any other action, suddenly decides it's NOT ok for the other to have multiple partners. (Close 2nd to above) *One side meets someone else to be bf/gf with so they make an alt and ghost the original. 10 2 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayashe Ninetails Posted May 19 Share Posted May 19 29 minutes ago, Rowan Amore said: In my observations of SL.relationships over.the years, this is how this normally goes: *It's ok for the woman to have multiple partners but not the man. *It's ok for the man to have multiple partners but not the woman. (Most prevalent) *It's ok for both at the start but then one side, who isn't getting any other action, suddenly decides it's NOT ok for the other to have multiple partners. (Close 2nd to above) *One side meets someone else to be bf/gf with so they make an alt and ghost the original. Binnnngo. Better yet - how about no relationship and just do what ya want (while telling potential partners to expect not a damn thing because you will be doing what you want). For companionship, just make a lot of male friends. Open relationships are such a mess in SL. RL might be easier to deal with - I dunno. But in SL?? You can set all the boundaries you want, but those are easily avoided with an alt (or 5). 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jester Shenanigans Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 10 hours ago, Paul Hexem said: Is it me, or does that sound like wanting your cake and eating it too? very much so 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jester Shenanigans Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 4 hours ago, Rowan Amore said: In my observations of SL.relationships over.the years, this is how this normally goes: *It's ok for the woman to have multiple partners but not the man. *It's ok for the man to have multiple partners but not the woman. (Most prevalent) *It's ok for both at the start but then one side, who isn't getting any other action, suddenly decides it's NOT ok for the other to have multiple partners. (Close 2nd to above) *One side meets someone else to be bf/gf with so they make an alt and ghost the original. Thats how it usually goes yes, i have never been in one myself sicne i dont do that, but from what ive seen with others this is spot on 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Persephone Emerald Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 (edited) 5 hours ago, Rowan Amore said: In my observations of SL.relationships over.the years, this is how this normally goes: *It's ok for the woman to have multiple partners but not the man. *It's ok for the man to have multiple partners but not the woman. (Most prevalent) *It's ok for both at the start but then one side, who isn't getting any other action, suddenly decides it's NOT ok for the other to have multiple partners. (Close 2nd to above) *One side meets someone else to be bf/gf with so they make an alt and ghost the original. My observations in RL are that most people don't really want or are not capable of handling an open or polyamorous relationship. I guess it's probably the same in SL. In both RL and SL, serial monogamy with some people cheating on the side seems to be the most common form. When I had a RL boyfriend who also played in SL, I was monogamous (not counting scripted objects such as alien plants - lol). When I had an SL only boyfriend, I was monogamous. He was still suspicious of me having male friends though. (I later found out he was cheating with another woman who was also giving him money for his sim.) All the rest of my time in SL I've either been not interested in relationships or have clearly stated that I'm SL polyamorous, meaning I can have pixel relations with whoever (or whatever) I want, and so can my partners. 🎂 🍰 🥞 🥮 🧁 👽 🍆 I agree with you on which are the most prevalent forms of SL relationships, based on the observations I've made. Edited May 20 by Persephone Emerald 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Caroline Takeda Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 She didn't asked to be lectured, did she ? 8 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 9 minutes ago, Caroline Takeda said: She didn't asked to be lectured, did she ? Funny, people hardly ever do! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 5 hours ago, Caroline Takeda said: She didn't asked to be lectured, did she ? Well, the SL forums aren't match.com. This section is explained as such... Lifestyles and Relationships Discussion on lifestyles and relationships in Second Life. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sam1 Bellisserian Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 Why even bother being BF and GF? Just go out and have sex with whomever you want and call it a day. Hang out with male/female friends. BTW, this isn't really called "experimenting" but it's a nice niche word to make it sound better. 11 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul Hexem Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 7 hours ago, Caroline Takeda said: She didn't asked to be lectured, did she ? Never post on open discussion forums if you don't want open discussion. 4 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colleen Criss Posted May 20 Share Posted May 20 Ok, wait. She did not ask for a lecture, that is true. Opinions have been given and the way I see it @Rowan Amore pretty much nailed it. I'm in an open relationship and we have zero issues. What it takes is adults and communication and honesty from everyone involved. I happen to adore him and have known him since 2008, we were friends 1st, we will be friends after/if it ends. Open discussions on the forum isn't how things always go because one or more tend to beat the topics to death. She will figure it out OR she won't. 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KyrasCorric Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 On 5/20/2022 at 10:14 AM, Sam1 Bellisserian said: Why even bother being BF and GF? Just go out and have sex with whomever you want and call it a day. Hang out with male/female friends. BTW, this isn't really called "experimenting" but it's a nice niche word to make it sound better. So the thing about it is that you don't always have to make emotional comfort and sex exclusive to one another. As someone who is poly and practices ENM, it's a nice comfort knowing that a relationship style allow for either partner to go out and just have that physical release with whoever wants to join them. But after all is said and done still be able to have someone you can be with who can be there for you in those moments that no one else gets to experience. I don't need to bare my heart and soul and hope for someone to accept all of it for me to stick my dick in them. But I do appreciate being able to have someone who is willing to see my vulnerabilities and those moments that would be behind closed doors, and share those moments together. On top of that there's times where you may just want a more sensual form of intimacy with someone. I'm more likely to spend an entire evening just softly exploring my partners body intimately and sensually before even getting to the point of penetration than I am an off the chance hook up or fling. Just because you can have sex with anyone doesn't mean that you're always going to get the kind of sex you want everytime. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
testsubjectseventynine Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 On 5/19/2022 at 2:53 PM, Persephone Emerald said: Cake in SL has no calories and can be re-rezzed over and over again, so there's no reason why we can't eat as much cake as we want, whenever and with whom ever we please. The cake is a lie. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 2 hours ago, testsubjectseventynine said: The cake is a lie. A good man will bring beefcake to the relationship. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 On 5/19/2022 at 6:26 PM, Ayashe Ninetails said: Binnnngo. Better yet - how about no relationship and just do what ya want (while telling potential partners to expect not a damn thing because you will be doing what you want). For companionship, just make a lot of male friends. Open relationships are such a mess in SL. RL might be easier to deal with - I dunno. But in SL?? You can set all the boundaries you want, but those are easily avoided with an alt (or 5). Is "friends with benefits" still a relationship? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayashe Ninetails Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 1 minute ago, Love Zhaoying said: Is "friends with benefits" still a relationship? Maybe. I've never done that, so I dunno. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 9 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said: Is "friends with benefits" still a relationship? Yes indeed it is. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted May 21 Share Posted May 21 1 hour ago, Rowan Amore said: Yes indeed it is. Sounds good to me! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Persephone Emerald Posted May 24 Share Posted May 24 (edited) On 5/21/2022 at 11:10 AM, testsubjectseventynine said: The cake is a lie. This is the perfect response. The cake is not real. The promise of cake in SL is thus a lie. Why are we arguing over a cake that doesn't exist? Edited May 24 by Persephone Emerald 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arielle Popstar Posted May 25 Share Posted May 25 On 5/20/2022 at 10:14 AM, Sam1 Bellisserian said: Why even bother being BF and GF? Just go out and have sex with whomever you want and call it a day. Hang out with male/female friends. BTW, this isn't really called "experimenting" but it's a nice niche word to make it sound better. Because well, time zones, real life priorities etc so that my partner and I are not always on at the same time but when we are, we are together because there is an emotional and genuine connection that transcends anything I could get with the occasional one nighters I run into when she isn't on. To depend on some random slex hookups as a replacement for something that is deeper and more meaningful, seems superficial and selling oneself short. Obviously both partners need to have a good level of maturity to be ok with such an arrangement but it is good because it dispenses with petty jealousies and wondering what the other was up to during times when one or the other cannot be online. 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katherine Heartsong Posted May 25 Share Posted May 25 11 hours ago, Persephone Emerald said: This is the perfect response. The cake is not real. The promise of cake in SL is thus a lie. Why are we arguing over a cake that doesn't exist? 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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