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why message someone if you wont continue the interraction?


Todeuz
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Things are very simple, if you have a problem then it's your job to notify other people so they will know and then maybe some will want to tolerate it (which is fine because it really is your problem). Doing so will make everyone's life easier. If you act like you don't have a problem then you will be treated like you don't have a problem and nobody is supposed to act like a certified psychologist and figure it our while playing/chatting/socializing in an Online game.

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I'm convinced these people just want you to entertain them while contributing nothing themselves.
I get messages so often where someone will just say "hi." Then I respond with a similarly engaging response, and they evaporate into thin air. I always wonder how they expect me to respond. 

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3 hours ago, Reyetta Claven said:

I'm convinced these people just want you to entertain them while contributing nothing themselves.
I get messages so often where someone will just say "hi." Then I respond with a similarly engaging response, and they evaporate into thin air. I always wonder how they expect me to respond. 

try to respond with sexy sentences🤣

ex:

“I love it when you wear that shirt/those pants. It really brings out your *body part*.”

Edited by Kalegthepsionicist
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3 hours ago, Coffee Pancake said:

This is probably exactly what they are expecting.

This!

I don't think I've ever had an interaction that began with "hi" and -didn't- end in them asking for sex. 🤣 I used to just say "hi" back and then keep replying with one word like they do, but it would still eventually get to something sexual, now I just ignore them completely (unless of course there's context to the IM or we've interacted before).

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14 hours ago, Reyetta Claven said:

I get messages so often where someone will just say "hi."

Ikr.. won't even reply to any of those.Too boring.

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4 hours ago, Coffee Pancake said:

The best part is when they get aggressive because you didn't carry the conversation, throw yourself upon them, put out instantly, dared to ask what they wanted .... 

That's often my favourite part of being male IRL and female in SL. It's those type of guys that I am almost tempted not be honest/forthcoming with, at least, you know, until they've got me home ;)

 

 

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On 12/30/2021 at 1:51 PM, KyrasCorric said:

I never said that they didn't have the right to choose. What I'm getting at is going from "You're funny, I like you" straight to "Oh, well you're broken, and you're not worth anything to me" over and over and over and over and over again does not help. There's a difference between being okay with something and having something so *****ing drilled into your head that it permanently scars you to the point where recovery doesn't even feel like it's possible. And when you get to that point, you're not going to find those that want to be with you because you're not even going to make the attempt to find those that want to be with you because your first immediate thought is that they're going to be the exact same thing as everyone else, why should I even bother to try. If a relationship doesn't happen, then it doesn't happen, and that's fine. But when you're flat out deemed unworthy of even being seen as a person over and over and over and over and over again, there's no just ''being okay with it."

Hey Kyras! This is a bit of an older post I missed (and super sorry to have missed it, too) And I don't know if this might help at all but -

My psychiatrist at one point put it this way - think of your depression and anxiety like it was another health condition (which it is. It's literally a medical condition). Like...let's say a heart condition for example. Now, say you mentioned it to someone who was interested in you. Just...hey, you know...this has happened. And they walked out. They totally have the right to (obviously) but also...huh. Not really a person I'd want to spend time with.

I know how depression twists thoughts, man. Just so you know - here's an outside person telling you that a****** is lying to you. Like straight up lying. You did a brave thing by being vulnerable. The other person was not able to handle that vulnerability. Which is not weakness (I know all about those awful lies the D tells) It's actually a strength. Good on you. As to the others? *shrugs* They are who they are.

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6 hours ago, Coffee Pancake said:

The best part is when they get aggressive because you didn't carry the conversation, throw yourself upon them, put out instantly, dared to ask what they wanted .... 

For me it almost always goes...

Them:  hi

Me:  Hello

Some time later...

Them:  I guess you're busy with other IMs.

Me:  

and rolling my eyes 

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Them: Hi! You really a former ballet dancer.

Me: Yes, 21 years of dancing internationally.

Them: Is it true that ballerinas are really flexible and kinky?

Me: If it is, you're not finding out.

And that's the family-friendly version of the usual pickup lines.

Edited by Giselle Kiyori
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25 minutes ago, Giselle Kiyori said:

Them: Hi! You really a former ballet dancer.

Me: Yes, 21 years of dancing internationally.

Them: Is it true that ballerinas are really flexible and kinky?

Me: If it is, you're not finding out.

And that's the family-friendly version of the usual pickup lines.

This is so, so, so gross. As someone with a massive interest in belly dance, I've long since stopped mentioning that hobby in casual conversation. You can imagine how those convos used to go. Took it out of my profile years and years ago. I took ballet classes when I was a kid, too. I don't mention that either. Just saying you love dance opens up a whole can of worms I'd rather avoid entirely.

As for random IMs that evaporate into thin air after hello, they're a slight bit better than the random "Hi, come over" *instant tp* IMs, that's for sure. Got one of those once while sitting in my own house on my own plot up in the sky on an empty sim and it weirded me out. Guess he found me in a random group or something.

I've started running around with "Sir, ThisIsAWendys" as my group title, and come to think of it, I've not gotten many random IMs since I started wearing it, minus a few guys who playfully tried to place orders. 😄

Oh and to answer the original question about people you know messaging and leaving you out there, I'd probably get tired of that, too. But knowing me, I'd just ask outright why they keep doing that.

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On 12/28/2021 at 1:29 PM, Todeuz said:

 but it feels like no matter what response I give they don't feel satisfied and never throw the ball back. 

 Try including a call to action in your responses, based on something you found on the profile.
Picks are good starting point, and groups.

 

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You are all lucky, getting those "hi" comments, Ive been hit with the "/me smiles" and "/me winks" as conversation starters. And Im going to be honest, it makes my blood boil, most of the times I decide to make it as frustrating for them as it is for me, for example, answering only with smileys, or :/ faces.

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7 minutes ago, StarlanderGoods said:

You are all lucky, getting those "hi" comments, Ive been hit with the "/me smiles" and "/me winks" as conversation starters. And Im going to be honest, it makes my blood boil, most of the times I decide to make it as frustrating for them as it is for me, for example, answering only with smileys, or :/ faces.

I have something about that on the first page of my profile...

However, please don't IM me with /me smiles.  This shifts the responsibility of the conversation onto me whereas it should remain with you.  

I just ignore them now.  I used to /me looks over and seeing the strange person with the creepy smile looking at her, hides behind the man next to her.   Or some variation of that.

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On 12/30/2021 at 7:13 AM, KyrasCorric said:

"Gain self confidence bro, you'll never gain self confidence if you don't try but you can only gain it if you try because you have to have it before even trying bro."

That is one of the most contradictory statements I've seen in my life. It doesn't even make sense.

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1 minute ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

That is one of the most contradictory statements I've seen in my life. It doesn't even make sense.

You'd be surprised by some of the many gems like this you hear in the military.

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On 1/3/2022 at 2:07 PM, Giselle Kiyori said:

Them: Hi! You really a former ballet dancer.

Me: Yes, 21 years of dancing internationally.

Them: Is it true that ballerinas are really flexible and kinky?

Me: If it is, you're not finding out.

And that's the family-friendly version of the usual pickup lines.

Baryshnikov wasn't such a nice guy after all.

Dancing-on-My-Grave-Kirkland-Gelsey-9780

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