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Inworld random friend requests.


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16 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

I've considered changing my auto-response to "Sorry, but I'm not really a people person".

   For a while I had "I'm not a people person. It's not me. It's people." on my profile. 

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1 hour ago, Sam1 Bellisserian said:

If I get one from a guy it's usually because they are lazy and just want to friend as a placeholder.

I find it's usually because you're female and they want to know as soon as you come online so they can add you to their booty-call list.

I have an auto-response on my alts which says something like "This is not my main account, so I don't accept friends requests here, but if we have had an interesting conversation that I enjoyed, I would be happy to friend you from my main account". Funnily enough, that has never happened.

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8 hours ago, Tama Suki said:

When a complete stranger sends you an unrequested friend request suddenly, how do you react?
Of course there is a profound difference if the subject is a noob or if he has an account born ten years ago.

I'm always weirdly on edge about it...it's like someone asking me for my phone number and I can't even tell their face in a crowd. Even with newbies - I kinda side-eye it. We live in a largely digital world now, and the rules that would apply outside of here (sending a message along with a friend request to a stranger) would still apply in here.

On another note - I can totally understand poofing in panic. I have had times where that certainly seemed like the most viable answer to an overly aggressive and uncomfortable situation. 

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4 minutes ago, Randall Ahren said:

I think you're missing the point. Random friend requests are not a big deal and they're pretty rare. If you get one, you should be happy. It's like finding a four leaf clover. Why be offended?

The other day, while I was concentrating to observe the beautiful works of an artist in a gallery and I was doing it while suspended in midair because I like to listen to the wind of SL loud in the headphones, suddenly the BLING of a request friendship ripped my soul away from my body and bleed my eardrums making me fall off my chair in RL.
After I recovered I climbed onto the desk and opened the guy's profile and I see that he is over 10 years old.
I ask him if he thinks it's a good thing for a senior account to send out random friend requests to another senior account without even attempting the slightest approach and why he behaves that way.
He replied that he sent the request simply because he liked my avatar.
I wear a female avatar for the record.

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31 minutes ago, Randall Ahren said:

I think you're missing the point. Random friend requests are not a big deal and they're pretty rare. If you get one, you should be happy. It's like finding a four leaf clover. Why be offended?

No, they aren't a big deal. But they certainly aren't rare either. 😂 I'm usually not offended personally, but I'm certainly not overjoyed about some random man demanding interaction with me out of the blue with zero context lol. I might be more excited to get them if they weren't just annoying sex pests 99% of the time.

24 minutes ago, Tama Suki said:

The other day, while I was concentrating to observe the beautiful works of an artist in a gallery and I was doing it while suspended in midair because I like to listen to the wind of SL loud in the headphones, suddenly the BLING of a request friendship ripped my soul away from my body and bleed my eardrums making me fall off my chair in RL.
After I recovered I climbed onto the desk and opened the guy's profile and I see that he is over 10 years old.
I ask him if he thinks it's a good thing for a senior account to send out random friend requests to another senior account without even attempting the slightest approach and why he behaves that way.
He replied that he sent the request simply because he liked my avatar.
I wear a female avatar for the record.

That's so weird to me lmao. Why couldn't he have just sent you an IM saying "hey, your avatar is really cool!" I would much prefer just getting a message like that.

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49 minutes ago, Randall Ahren said:

I think you're missing the point. Random friend requests are not a big deal and they're pretty rare. If you get one, you should be happy. It's like finding a four leaf clover. Why be offended?

perhaps they affaid for being harras,

actually i am confuse

since nobody can hurts you in virtual worlds  even touching you lol

besdie you can block them

so simple

 

Edited by Kalegthepsionicist
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13 minutes ago, LilNosferatu said:

That's so weird to me lmao. Why couldn't he have just sent you an IM saying "hey, your avatar is really cool!" I would much prefer just getting a message like that.

And above all we were in an art gallery.
If you are a male hunter of women, what better opportunity to approach a lady talking about the works of art present?
He wasn't very smart.

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47 minutes ago, Tama Suki said:

And above all we were in an art gallery.
If you are a male hunter of women, what better opportunity to approach a lady talking about the works of art present?
He wasn't very smart.

well actually avi do something to other avi  cant kill you lol unless your reality inside the virtual.

 

Edited by Kalegthepsionicist
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1 hour ago, Randall Ahren said:

I think you're missing the point. Random friend requests are not a big deal and they're pretty rare. If you get one, you should be happy. It's like finding a four leaf clover. Why be offended?

 

13 minutes ago, Kalegthepsionicist said:

perhaps they affaid for being harras,

actually i am confuse

since nobody can hurts you in virtual worlds  even touching you lol

besdie you can block them

so simple

 

These reactions are disappointing.  Not everyone is a social butterfly.  Not everyone wants to be interrupted.  Not everyone enjoys confrontation (which is how unwanted communication can feel.)  Suggesting  that things are "no big deal" or "you should feel flattered" are completely emotionally blind.  

 

 

 

Not everyone you meet is just like you.

I'm up for a chat, so everyone else should be as well.

I'd be super flattered to receive a friend request for absolutely no reason from someone I've never seen and knows nothing about me, so everyone else is too.

You can't be physically hurt, so I don't have to take your feelings or personality into account. 

I'll just push my personality onto others until they block me.  That's entertainment. 

I don't feel anxiety when meeting new people unexpectedly,  so no one else does either.

I'm logged in.  You're logged in.  We must be here for the same reason and the only reason that I can see is my reason.

 

 

If someone poofs, maybe it is personal to someone who only considers themselves.  Being an extrovert is seen as a virtue in most places. It's not.  Being an introvert is seen as a weakness.  It's not.  It's just not your way.  Not everyone is here to chat and party and they're certainly not here for your entertainment. 

Be understanding if someone poofs.  You can help by asking an open ended questions.  Interact in public chat first.  Skip the friend request and ask for or give a calling card if you get past "Hi."  Keep it light.  Don't make any demands on their time. Lasting friendships take time.  Those introverts are worth it.  If you can't see the value of these differences, that's a real shame

Yes, people can feel panic when the ding of an IM comes through.

There is one thing most introverts have really enjoyed over the last 2 years.  Quarantining.  Zero stress.

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As @Cinnamon Mistwood said, each of us has a different sensitivity.
Anyway bots are a service that you can also appreciate when you enter a shop or an art gallery or a thematic sim or a club because they are created to serve a specific role and deliver a message created for the visitor, they don't send firendship request.
Messages from groups are the same more or less, a service that you have knowingly subscribed to.
What you are rambling about has nothing to do with the theme of the post.

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- no talk, nothing in common, hey you sex now, and a few more  .....declined ..possible even with mute and derender
-  try to make a conversation, but a visit to the dentist more fun?... "lets chat next time we meet "

for me friends don't have to be on the list, but also not collecting names to see them pop on and off.
SL isn't FB or Twitter or any other thing where status is gotten by numbers.
 

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15 minutes ago, Alwin Alcott said:

mute and derender

I think derender is the most heinous of punishments that can be inflicted. 😄

 

16 minutes ago, Alwin Alcott said:

SL isn't FB or Twitter or any other thing where status is gotten by numbers.

Agree 100%.
It is also true that for those who have a very large list of friends (I have cleaned mine recently and I have gone from a hundred to about fifteen) You cannot remember them all.
But if you know in principle that you do not accept random friends, you are sure that at least the other person remembers you. And then you can open his IM chat to realize you've been talking in the past and it comes back to you who he is.

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