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Does gender matter?


Tama Suki
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On 12/20/2021 at 1:30 PM, Tama Suki said:

I never change my clothes very often.
I've been wearing my avatar for years now, every now and then I add something and every now and then I replace something but always remaining a female-cyborg-android-combat-ninja.
But today I was thinking of an important thing that I never really paid much attention to.
I always wear a female avatar.
Actually I am a stright man in real life.
I don't like anything about sex and pornography and have never looked for anything within that horizon. Of course I don't condemn anyone who deals with those things in a playful way. Everyone can do what they like and if you are a person respectful of my individuality and you don't throw that landscape in my face you can easily be my friend even if in private you have fun with tentacles and weird stuff.
I'm not sure why I like to wear a female avatar.
Perhaps because I find women aesthetically much more beautiful than men not only in physical form but also and above all for the grace of their attitudes in moving.
But I was wondering:
Do you think it is right to always represent yourself to everyone as a woman even if you are not in reality?

Hashing this out again for the 10,000th time on the forums, are we? 

It's SL, be who you want. 

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I don't think gender matters  really. Just be who you want to be. My best friend is male in rl but he always uses a female avatar on sl and his avatar always looks absolutely amazing. Also I am a woman in rl but I have both male and female avatars that I am happy to walk around as. When i started sl I began sticking to being a female avatar up until I got ahold of a male mesh body and then things changed. So yes I don't think it matters whether someone wants to play as the opposite gender to what they are in rl just like people can choose whether to dress up like their rl self or have different hair and style.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 12/20/2021 at 7:30 PM, Tama Suki said:

But I was wondering:
Do you think it is right to always represent yourself to everyone as a woman even if you are not in reality?

I did not read the whole thread, so maybe I will just repeat what has already been said.

In SL you can be whatever you want, so there is no question what is right. However, I think it would not be right to leave someone (probably a guy) believing that you are a woman in RL if he invests time and/or feelings into you.

I hope I wrote that right lol (English is not my 1st language).

16 minutes ago, Ren Toxx said:

Of course it matters. If it’s a male and he wears a tutu, that’s bonus points.

I don't think it would be very appreciated if I wore a tutu 😄

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On 12/20/2021 at 1:30 PM, Tama Suki said:

I never change my clothes very often.
I've been wearing my avatar for years now, every now and then I add something and every now and then I replace something but always remaining a female-cyborg-android-combat-ninja.
But today I was thinking of an important thing that I never really paid much attention to.
I always wear a female avatar.
Actually I am a stright man in real life.
I don't like anything about sex and pornography and have never looked for anything within that horizon. Of course I don't condemn anyone who deals with those things in a playful way. Everyone can do what they like and if you are a person respectful of my individuality and you don't throw that landscape in my face you can easily be my friend even if in private you have fun with tentacles and weird stuff.
I'm not sure why I like to wear a female avatar.
Perhaps because I find women aesthetically much more beautiful than men not only in physical form but also and above all for the grace of their attitudes in moving.
But I was wondering:
Do you think it is right to always represent yourself to everyone as a woman even if you are not in reality?

No. But people who keep starting threads on this topic want it to.

Edited by Prokofy Neva
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5 minutes ago, Prokofy Neva said:

No. But people who keep starting threads on this topic want to.

I think this attitude of yours may be more profitable on Twitter which is designed to fuel such behavior.
You would feel happier over there in my opinion.

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25 minutes ago, Tama Suki said:

I think this attitude of yours may be more profitable on Twitter which is designed to fuel such behavior.
You would feel happier over there in my opinion.

I think your own review of all your posts, which you can do on your own account page, might help you to understand what "fueling" is, although I don't think you will find happiness. 

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55 minutes ago, Prokofy Neva said:

I think your own review of all your posts, which you can do on your own account page, might help you to understand what "fueling" is, although I don't think you will find happiness. 

All within the perimeter of my personal content dear friend, I don't go around in other people's posts bothering them with personal matters that have nothing to do with the topic being discussed.
I think if you have had a bad day you shouldn't blame me.

Edited by Tama Suki
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3 hours ago, Tama Suki said:

All within the perimeter of my personal content dear friend, I don't go around in other people's posts bothering them with personal matters that have nothing to do with the topic being discussed.
I think if you have had a bad day you shouldn't blame me.

Just a quick point.. You lash out at anyone who even remotely criticizes your topics or posts. I would think it more fair to ask if you are having a constant bad day. 

This topic has been brought up ad nauseum for the past 15 years. No one cares who you are behind the keyboard. Be whoever you want in SL. Heck, be WHATEVER you want. 

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14 minutes ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

Just a quick point.. You lash out at anyone who even remotely criticizes your topics or posts. I would think it more fair to ask if you are having a constant bad day. 

Unfortunately when I am attacked without a real reason I have a tendency to defend myself, I have this flaw.
I also tried to do psychotherapy to correct my neurosis but then the psychologist was too expensive and I had to stop the therapy. I ask you to be indulgent.

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31 minutes ago, Tama Suki said:

Unfortunately when I am attacked without a real reason I have a tendency to defend myself, I have this flaw.
I also tried to do psychotherapy to correct my neurosis but then the psychologist was too expensive and I had to stop the therapy. I ask you to be indulgent.

A contrary opinion to yours is not an attack. Just because someone disagrees with you does not mean they are attacking you nor should you automatically attack in return. You keep asking for us to be indulgent, i ask you to take 5 minutes before responding to a perceived attack and let yourself calm down before posting.

Threads like this have popped up hundreds of times over the years. In any society gender should have no bearing on how you treat someone. That is why we are tired of seeing this question over and over.

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7 minutes ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

A contrary opinion to yours is not an attack. Just because someone disagrees with you does not mean they are attacking you nor should you automatically attack in return. You keep asking for us to be indulgent, i ask you to take 5 minutes before responding to a perceived attack and let yourself calm down before posting.

Threads like this have popped up hundreds of times over the years. In any society gender should have no bearing on how you treat someone. That is why we are tired of seeing this question over and over.

Yes, you are probably right.
The fact is that I have recently been here and I cannot know how many times a subject has been posted even if I do a thorough search it would be very difficult to do so and I would have to do a keyword research first to then be able to understand the context in which those keywords are expressed in the search result.
Not to mention that in all threads that are of a certain age there is a warning asking if you are sure you want to brush up on that old thread.
Please be indulgent.

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I am a collection of pixels, spouting the options of a RL Hooman you will never see.

Other than the fact that I am of legal age to be on the Main Grid - all my other demographics (and every other avatars) are irrelevant.

I’m not here looking for Real-World sex - I want something that lasts longer 🙂

No hate towards people who *are* in SL, but IMHO my way works for me !

image.gif.7bbc1ff84cc2db55f9c9b7d150adafb4.gif

Edited by Amanda Crisp
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I think it depends on how you RP them, I actually made a male alt right after I created Nyx here, but I mostly use him for driving and sailing since he doesn't get a million IMs as soon as he logs in asking for ERP.

Tried that once, with a friend who wanted someone they knew to get them pregnant (even bought him the HUD for it) so they wouldn't have random "fathers" from an "adult" party but could still have the HUD on for people who wanted "risk" in the RP, but I decided not to play that way with people I don't know as a man because I couldn't for the life of me keep my pronouns straight.

Six foot two well armed biker guy who looks like he fell out of the Russian Mob accidentally referring to himself as "she" kinda breaks the RP XD

A few of my regular partners are herm or shemale, most of them RL men, though a few are actually trans. What they have between their legs on the other side of the screen seems irrelevant to me as long as they are creative, literate, and able to stay in character...

And don't start sending **** pics after fifteen minutes.

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Okay, time for me to fess up. I'm actually a cat.

Part Abby, and then a mix of whatever tom was in the neighbourhood that night, my mom didn't get into details. 

This whole thing about me being male behind the keys of a stunning redhead female avatar? That was simply me RPing human.

Fooled ya all, suckers!!! Now, I'll let Bast know the takeover can begin.

PS. Obviously my feline gender doesn't matter.

Edited by Katherine Heartsong
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On 1/16/2022 at 10:33 AM, Tama Suki said:

I also tried to do psychotherapy to correct my neurosis but then the psychologist was too expensive and I had to stop the therapy. I ask you to be indulgent.

Don't you live in a country with universal health care?

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Gender should not matter - to a point. If an interpersonal relationship develops along the lines of partnership then one would expect openness from both parties involved.

That said though it is down to each individual and their right to decide whether or not they are happy with gender switched avatars / players behind the screen.

Edited by Kyle Blackwood
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To me, it doesn't matter in the least. On SL, you are who you want to be. For example..

 

There are... Dogs, cats, dragons, robots, escorts, dancers, djs, auctioneers, etc... on SL.
While in "real life" there are people, of various skin colors.

One of my avatars, for example, is a creature with fiery eyes, wings, a tail, scales, elf ears, and wings, yet isn't a dragon or demon. 
Another of my avatars is a Dr. Who inspired android, whom has the soul purpose of being the account I store my L$ on, so I don't constantly go broke.

But, to be honest, no, gender doesn't matter. 99% of the time, you're not ever going to meet the other person, much less talk on voice or do a cam session, so, being a judgmental, self conscious, little freak that tries to "demand" someone voice verify, or whatever else, is quite frankly not only old hat, it's tiring, it's played out, and it's absolutely immature. I don't know how many times I've had wanna be "doms," for example, try to 'demand' I voice verify. Why should I? We're never going to meet, in real life, so, why should I allow you to encroach upon my privacy, just to pander to your narrow minded, self consciously driven, feebly established 'comfort' in knowing for sure what my 'gender' is? Just to make you 'feel' better, that the entity behind the avatar matches what I look like inworld? What, then, if I were to reveal that my "real" name isn't actually Luna? Am I to be judged for that, as well? Especially by someone whom I will more than likely never meet in person? Certainly not.

 

Having said that, most people I've met inworld didn't make a big deal about it. Some of them are friends, some are customers, but all of them are better people than the judgmental, the users, the manipulative, sociopathic, psychopathic, the ones that see people merely as objects for their own sick amusement.

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I much respect people that do voice actuallt

well some my friend dj they talk, and I trust them more than other avatar, its very possible they have alt that not do voices,  but my respect ges to the voice avatar than ninja avatar with many faces.

imho

Edited by Kalegthepsionicist
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