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How do other people react to your avatars?


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Just now, Ayeleeon said:

Maybe, but why are they standing around in a place where people dance? Sometimes I wonder if part of the issue is that this account does not have payment info attached. Of my three accounts only one does, I see no reason to add it more than that, it is easy enough to transfer Lindens. If they are looking for a Sugar Daddy though I am not thier guy anyway.

You might have hit on something there. Especially if the place was somewhere jazzy and up-market, like Frank's or somewhere similar.

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I bet thats it then. 

You can put payment info on file, use it once then remove it again. It will show on your profile but you can still carry on as before, using your alt instead.

On the other hand if you don't want to attract the gold-diggers, maybe leave yourself as no PIOF. 😁

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18 minutes ago, Maitimo said:

I bet thats it then. 

You can put payment info on file, use it once then remove it again. It will show on your profile but you can still carry on as before, using your alt instead.

On the other hand if you don't want to attract the gold-diggers, maybe leave yourself as no PIOF. 😁

Is that a thing?  Using PIOF as a way to decide who to socialize with?  I don't think I've ever checked to see if anyone has that or not.

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35 minutes ago, Ayeleeon said:

Maybe, but why are they standing around in a place where people dance? Sometimes I wonder if part of the issue is that this account does not have payment info attached. Of my three accounts only one does, I see no reason to add it more than that, it is easy enough to transfer Lindens. If they are looking for a Sugar Daddy though I am not thier guy anyway.

I'm not sure. I often think SL is more similar to RL than people acknowledge. In an RL club, if you try and strike up a conversation with strangers, some will be open to chatting, but many aren't, as they're just having fun with their friends and don't want to be disturbed, or simply you're not their type etc. 

I don't ignore guys who try and chat to me, but sometimes I shut conversations down pretty quickly when it's obvious to me we're not compatible or looking for very different things.

Nice thing about SL is that you have a profile which offers an opportunity to give a little insight into who you are and what you're about. It's more important than some people give it credit for. 

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1 minute ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

Is that a thing?  Using PIOF as a way to decide who to socialize with?  I don't think I've ever checked to see if anyone has that or not.

Same. I've never even thought to look at that. I get that come people are cautious about engaging with alts, and suspect the worst, but for me, anyone who checks payment info first = a bit of a red flag!

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20 minutes ago, Ayeleeon said:

Maybe, but why are they standing around in a place where people dance? Sometimes I wonder if part of the issue is that this account does not have payment info attached. Of my three accounts only one does, I see no reason to add it more than that, it is easy enough to transfer Lindens. If they are looking for a Sugar Daddy though I am not thier guy anyway.

Couple things here. I used to go to dance clubs of all types (formal, jazz, blues, rock, industrial, techno, Latin, hip hop, etc.) very regularly. Usually alone - standing around or dancing. Often, I'd be up for a chat or dance. But eventually, it all became too tedious where a "care to dance?" would lead, within 5 minutes or less, to "we should go back to my place!" No thanks, I'm good. These days, I'm suspicious if anyone on the sidelines IMs me for dancing because it usually turns out that's not what they're looking for. Unless a guy is already out on the dance floor by himself busting grooves so hard he's throwing his back out when he IMs me - then I'll eagerly join in, because that's totally my jam.

Second thing - the no payment info on file is a general flag my female friends use to signal "alt" - not an immediate issue for me since Aya is technically an alt-turned-main (but both accounts have payment info) and I don't care all that much, but many of them have had bad experiences with that and are hesitant around them. I don't know if it's the first thing they check, but given the shenanigans they've run into in the past (like exes using alts to stalk/troll them), they don't entirely ignore it, either.

The hair thing is definitely not something I'd pay any attention to. My human avatars have the majority of their heads shaved and wear head tattoos. The day I start judging men on their hair is the day I'm going to have to start going back to traditional hairstyles (not happening).

Oh, and to get back on topic for a second - how people react to my avies? They don't. I get the occasional "wow cool avie!" IM, mostly from women, but SL is pretty silent for me these days and I kinda don't mind it. I got more frequent IMs when I looked more...ermm...I hate to say normal but...regular? Plain? Average? Once I started rocking more alternative human avies and non-human avies, the random IMs vanished (yay).

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1 hour ago, Ayeleeon said:

but why are they standing around in a place where people dance?

Sometimes people visit dance clubs and ballrooms just to listen to the music. Unfortunatelly sometimes they really stand close to the dance floor and it looks like they are looking for a dance partner. Or maybe they just like to be looked at :D idk, but anyway don't take it personally... It's not your fault. And sorry for offtopic.

Edited by tomm55
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23 minutes ago, Ayashe Ninetails said:

But eventually, it all became too tedious where a "care to dance?" would lead, within 5 minutes or less, to "we should go back to my place!" No thanks, I'm good. These days, I'm suspicious if anyone on the sidelines IMs me for dancing because it usually turns out that's not what they're looking for.

This right here.  ^^^^

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2 hours ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

Is that a thing?  Using PIOF as a way to decide who to socialize with?  I don't think I've ever checked to see if anyone has that or not.

Yes it is, it sounds shallow, but when I was single, and someone would IM me, I always checked to see if they have PIOF, especially if their avie is full mesh, if they don't have that, I automatically think they are an alt, they may or not be but  Ayeleeon has already said he is an alt. That could be a reason he gets no responses, sometimes woman are just suspicious. 

Oh! And on topic, I never received a lot of attention one way or the other, sometimes it just felt like I was invisible....(like here on the forums sometimes....)

Edited by Annie Nova
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2 hours ago, PixieGirrrrl said:

a bit of a red flag

A red flag, I suppose I understand why, maybe because the person is a gold digger, and that could be true, for myself, the no PIOF is a red flag, because it could mean they were an alt and trying to stir up crap. I didn't use to be this cynical but the longer I'm in SL the more I just simply don't trust a lot of people, having been burned so many times. 

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I suppose I profile people as well and make assumptions.  I check out profiles and will be suspicious of empty ones.  I read picks and steer clear of people who say they don't like drama or will send their families after me if I do them wrong.  I check out groups to see what they might do for fun in SL.  I don't like seeing all groups hidden.  I hide shopping groups because who cares where I shop, but I keep social groups and interest groups showing on purpose.

I hadn't thought of POIF as meaning much.  I don't care if the avatar is all updated mesh, or their age, or even if it's an alt.

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I'm not looking for a partner but if I was, no PIOF would make me suspicious that (a) the other person is an alt and (b) they have a main account who's already partnered to someone else.

Single or not, I would not want to be involved in anyone else's adultery fetish.

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18 minutes ago, Maitimo said:

I'm not looking for a partner but if I was, no PIOF would make me suspicious that (a) the other person is an alt and (b) they have a main account who's already partnered to someone else.

Single or not, I would not want to be involved in anyone else's adultery fetish.

Is that what it is then?  If a person is looking for a relationship (or even a one-night stand), then no POIF might be a clue that there is deception going on.  Does deception matter if it's a one night stand?

Since I socialize for neither reason, that isn't an issue.  I can't be used for unknown sex drama.  

Unless...  it is someone's fetish to dance and chat platonically for an hour and nothing else.  I will even dance and chat with people who have a partner showing in their profiles. Why not?  I have a partner showing in mine. If it matters to the potential dance partner, I assume they won't IM for a chat.  I don't consider dancing and chatting to be particularly drama inducing. 

Edited by Cinnamon Mistwood
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22 minutes ago, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

Is that what it is then?  If a person is looking for a relationship (or even a one-night stand), then no POIF might be a clue that there is deception going on.  Does deception matter if it's a one night stand?

 

It would if his jealous girlfriend finds out and wants to kill me...

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I perve profiles occasionally. If I get an IM, first I zoom and check out the avi. Second I do a three phase check. 

1) PIOF? If not probably an alt.

2) Groups

3) Picks

Plus the overall content and tone, which builds a picture.

I once told a guy his groups put me off, and he accused me of pre judging him.

Well yeah.

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3 minutes ago, BelindaN said:

I perve profiles occasionally. If I get an IM, first I zoom and check out the avi. Second I do a three phase check. 

1) PIOF? If not probably an alt.

2) Groups

3) Picks

Plus the overall content and tone, which builds a picture.

Same. I tend to check the profile of anyone unknown who IMs me, since it can usually give me a clue or two about who they are and what they're after.

If a guy IMs me asking to dance, with a profile bio bragging about being a super alpha chad who loves sex with women he meets at clubs, multiple daddy dom related groups, and picks full of sexual conquests... then, sure I'll take the risk of seeming a bit judgmental when I decline or ignore his IM entirely.

Thank god once I went for an anime avatar, the creepy IMs slowed down tremendously. 😵 I personally don't really pay much attention to whether they have payment info or not, but I definitely see how/why that could be considered a red flag in certain scenarios.

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9 minutes ago, LilNosferatu said:

Same. I tend to check the profile of anyone unknown who IMs me, since it can usually give me a clue or two about who they are and what they're after.

If a guy IMs me asking to dance, with a profile bio bragging about being a super alpha chad who loves sex with women he meets at clubs, multiple daddy dom related groups, and picks full of sexual conquests... then, sure I'll take the risk of seeming a bit judgmental when I decline or ignore his IM entirely.

Thank god once I went for an anime avatar, the creepy IMs slowed down tremendously. 😵 I personally don't really pay much attention to whether they have payment info or not, but I definitely see how/why that could be considered a red flag in certain scenarios.

Along with the things you mentioned, if the profile pic is from 2009, no no no.

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2 hours ago, Maitimo said:

It would if his jealous girlfriend finds out and wants to kill me...

Still not my drama.  She can take it up with her partner, not me.  The idea that someone is so screaming mad that even their avatar is bursting blood vessels and having a stroke is kinda funny.  I am probably the least fun person to argue with in SL.  Watch me NOT get mad or defensive as I walk slowly away to find someone sane to interact with.

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8 hours ago, Ayeleeon said:

Maybe, but why are they standing around in a place where people dance? Sometimes I wonder if part of the issue is that this account does not have payment info attached. Of my three accounts only one does, I see no reason to add it more than that, it is easy enough to transfer Lindens. If they are looking for a Sugar Daddy though I am not thier guy anyway.

First thing i do on my Radar while in a club (or anywhere) and i want to socialize, is sort by Account Age..

What usually works for me is that less than 2000 days works better..It isn't fools proof method cause people have way too many alts in SL but give it a try.

Screenshot_2022-01-13_00-15-31.thumb.png.2d206fea154d272b3f1f9bb89993ccca.png

Edited by Nick0678
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8 hours ago, Maitimo said:

alt

 

8 hours ago, PixieGirrrrl said:

alt

 

7 hours ago, Ayashe Ninetails said:

alt

 

5 hours ago, Annie Nova said:

alt

 

3 hours ago, BelindaN said:

alt

Great, sometimes I really wish i had just stuck with my main.

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