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Hooking up (for conversations) with total strangers.


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42 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

When we are out sitting at a bar, my husband will often comment to someone on something they said.  Since they are sitting right next to him, it is definitely easy to hear what is being said, but to comment on it always seemed like an invasion of privacy to me. 

That is the difference in our perspectives - he views the entire world as a huge social place where everyone should be chit-chatting with everyone else, whereas I see the world as something for me to explore while avoiding as many people as possible (kind of like my SL).

I do that sometimes, when I think I have an IN, like if it's something that everyone has been talking about or something in the news or things like that..

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3 hours ago, Muffinstuff said:

As long as you aren't a creep, people will generally reply. With that said, I also think it's a regional thing. Cliques are pretty easy to spot and I tend to avoid them.

So absolutely true about the creepers.... I've gotten more than enough compliments on my AVI, but really the only people that I am more than happy to talk to are the ones who actually read my profile. 

So guys, instead of just letting a woman know her AVATAR looks amazing, read the profile and comment on HER. You'd be surprised how much of a better reception you'll get in return. 

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On 8/3/2021 at 10:06 AM, PixelBerry said:

Yeah it is different over here ( Norway ), my boyfriend was shocked on how friendly and welcoming Americans are, meanwhile we Norwegians are afraid of starting a conversation with strangers, and tries to avoid any social interaction unless necessary, there are of course exceptions, but more likely most of us are like this.

I've heard this about Norway! But also most Norwegians seem laid back?

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I'm a bit shy and introvert...but I've been told that once I warm up, I can't shut up xD 

I don't agree that Londoners are unfriendly though! Most of us will talk to anyone...just not on the tube during rush hour 🙂 London's friendlier than villages where people come up and say "You're not from round these parts are you?" 😮

 

Edited by Rat Luv
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3 hours ago, Rat Luv said:

Yes ☹️ We just want to order a drink or food, not do maths ☹️

It's easy. Let's say you have a bill that comes out to $26.72 US and the sales tax is 5.6%. Initially, your bill is 26.72 + (0.056 x 26.72). To calculate your bill with a tip you simply calculate 26.72 + (0.15 x 26.72) + (0.056 x 26.72) where your tip is 15% of the cost of your meal without the sales tax. In this case your total payment would be $34.42. 

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5 hours ago, Rat Luv said:

Yes ☹️ We just want to order a drink or food, not do maths ☹️

That's kind of funny. That's all I ever wanted to do, too, but that space to add a tip is still on the ticket. Where did that come from? It wasn't there when I was growing up. Now it is. 

When I learned how low of a wage waiters and waitresses actually got paid, and years later, the workers were forced to share their tips with everyone else including the busboys, even the lazy SOBs that sat on their butts while everyone else toted barges and lifted bails...

Pay workers decent wages and they don't need tips to make ends meet from week to week. Yeah, been there. My feet never stopped hurting and the wages were like $2USD an hour.

Now see what you've done! Got me all riled up over the UK vs the US to tip or not to tip $2 tip. Get off my lawn! 👩‍🦯

Edited by Silent Mistwalker
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11 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

Let's say you have a bill that comes out to $26.72 US and the sales tax is 5.6%. Initially, your bill is 26.72 + (0.056 x 26.72).

What language is that? :S

 

(PS Just joking...I hate maths and my brain melted reading that!)

Edited by Rat Luv
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4 hours ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

 

Pay workers decent wages and they don't need tips to make ends meet from week to week. Yeah, been there. My feet never stopped hurting and the wages were like $2USD an hour.

Yes, please do, because I can't do maths to save my life and will end up tipping 1p or £100!

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Been several  times in the US and I find people there very kind and willing to talk to me and my partner who are strangers to them. So I think it is what also others have stated: it depends on the person who you will meet. I am an introvert, my partner an extravert so he will mostly begin the conversation. I am more at ease with a one to one conversation, like interviews :-).

As for the Netherlands where I live I think it is the same as elsewhere in the world. I guess we would not start the conversation with a total stranger as such. But as we see someone need help, then we will approach that person and will help. Or when a stranger will start a conversation we will certainly be willing to join.

To give an example. I live in the old city of Utrecht. Driving a car in the narrow streets with lots of one-way traffic is a horror. We saw a rather (for the situation clumsy) big car with tourists stranded in a place where no cars were allowed with two obviously panicking women holding maps.  We immediately went there, helped them out of their predicament, showed them nice places to go and had a very nice and funny conversation with them. Later, we saw them again in the city, fortunately much happier, and had a drink with them. That's how it goes sometimes, it depends on the situation.

 

Edited by archangel969
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24 minutes ago, archangel969 said:

As for the Netherlands where I live I think it is the same as elsewhere in the world. I guess we would not start the conversation with a total stranger as such. But as we see someone need help, then we will approach that person and will help. Or when a stranger will start a conversation we will certainly be willing to join.

 

I would like to add, if anyone here is planning to visit the Netherlands and would also like to go to Utrecht and you would like to have tips, please pm me. The city is older than Amsterdam and also has canals like Amsterdam - where I studied - and Delft - where I was born. I can give you a list of nice addresses with film houses, a film café, other nice pubs, wine tastings, restaurants, museums (I live in the museum district) and nice things to do in the area.

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8 hours ago, Rat Luv said:
14 hours ago, Bree Giffen said:

Let's say you have a bill that comes out to $26.72 US and the sales tax is 5.6%. Initially, your bill is 26.72 + (0.056 x 26.72).

What language is that? :S

 

(PS Just joking...I hate maths and my brain melted reading that!)

Unless the service is really bad, I stick to 20% because it is easier/faster to calculate.  Figuring out 10% is pretty easy - double it and write that number on the tip line.

But yeah, you do still have to do some math.

 

As Silent mentioned, I'd rather they just pay folks a flat salary and do away with the whole Tip thing.  It gets more complicated and confusing when tipping people like your hairdresser, delivery drivers, hotel maids, etc......  However, the tipping thing is so ingrained in us, that even if they increased salaries, many folks would still tip.

There are some locales in the US that automatically add a tip to all bills, no matter how small the parties.  I've had to get in the habit of checking for that when we travel -- I once tipped a waitress 20% on a tab over $100 and later found out when scrutinizing the bill that they had already added 18%.

Edited by LittleMe Jewell
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8 hours ago, Rat Luv said:

Yes, please do, because I can't do maths to save my life and will end up tipping 1p or £100!

I just do the simple one. I base it on the quality of the work done. Good waiters/waitresses will get the highest amount I can afford. If you get a $15- $20USD tip from me, you provided me with excellent service. When I just don't have the extra cash I leave my usual tip (no less than $2US) and let them know I do place a higher value on their service and wish I could give them more. Since I tend to be a repeat customer, most establishments are perfectly happy with my method and wish others would do the same.

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18 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

There are some locales in the US that automatically add a tip to all bills, no matter how small the parties.  I've had to get in the habit of checking for that when we travel -- I once tipped a waitress 20% on a tab over $100 and later found out when scrutinizing the bill that they had already added 18%.

Establishments that do that, don't get my business. I consider it theft. It is MY money and I will determine how much of it and when it is spent. 

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6 minutes ago, Silent Mistwalker said:

Establishments that do that, don't get my business. I consider it theft. It is MY money and I will determine how much of it and when it is spent. 

Yeah, I tend to not return to those places, but often you don't know they use such practices until you've already ordered something there.  They do typically have a notice, in very tiny print, either on the menu or the bill, but it is easy to miss said notice if you aren't really paying close attention.

Additionally, if an establishment is paying their wait staff a higher-than-normal minimum wage, they should notify customers of such.  That would impact my typical tipping percentage.  I don't need to tip a waitress 20% if she is being paid $15 per hour.

 

 

And sort of back to the topic -- discussing tipping with folks from other countries is always interesting conversation.  I've been told that in some places, tipping is actually seen more as an insult, though I've never really understood that.

Edited by LittleMe Jewell
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12 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Yeah, I tend to not return to those places, but often you don't know they use such practices until you've already ordered something there.  They do typically have a notice, in very tiny print, either on the menu or the bill, but it is easy to miss said notice if you aren't really paying close attention.

Additionally, if an establishment is paying their wait staff a higher-than-normal minimum wage, they should notify customers of such.  That would impact my typical tipping percentage.  I don't need to tip a waitress 20% if she is being paid $15 per hour.

That's why I don't use percentages and base it on quality of service. Every time this has happened without my knowledge, I have disputed the charge (just the tip) and each time that amount has been returned to my account. Someone was smart enough to realize that if they hadn't refunded the tip amount, they would have lost the money from the meal. It isn't worth it for them to fight it because it costs them more to do so. And the wait staff is happy because they got their tip in cash and didn't have to share it with anyone.

Edited by Silent Mistwalker
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On 8/12/2021 at 11:21 PM, Rat Luv said:

Yes, it's seen as rude in Japan. I don't really understand why...

Not just Japan but in many other Asian countries I've been to as well.

From what I understand, they consider their services as being fairly priced for what is provided, so there is no need to pay more than what is the agreed transactional value.

My Asian friends told me it's not so much insulting but rather weird, and something the cashier or waiter does not know how to handle. So that would put the person receiving the extra money in an awkward position, hence the "rude" connotation.

I can understand that as if I am tipping in an establishment I never know how much or little is crossing the rude line so I tend to leave 10%. Tipping is not required here in Ireland but is considered a nice gesture in most cafes and smaller restaurants.

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