Do you consider yourself a narcissist?

[cunomar]

I was unfortunate enough to meet one , or a group , i will never know , could be one person with 100 alts or 4 people with 25 alts each ?

And i'd say a true narcissist is revealed by their hatred of happy people . They have to consider themselves the best and brightest , the happiest , and so they are completely unaware that they are the cause of their own misery . They promote bitterness and hatred wherever they go for whoever they meet .

They thrive in SL because "if you have a problem just block them and get over it" , which is like telling someone who has radiation poisoning to take an aspirin and get back to work .

Eventually you just have to accept that they are everyone in SL

Edited June 29, 2021 by cunomar

[Innula Zenovka]

Since narcissism isn't a binary state, shouldn't the question be about how narcissistic we consider ourselves to be as compared with other people (possibly with a follow-up about how we reached that comparative evaluation)?    

[Luna Bliss]

19 hours ago, Marigold Devin said:

21 hours ago, Jordan Whitt said:

Nope.  Most days I hate myself.

True narcissists actually hate themselves, and envy others for what they have; money, status, good looks, etc. 

So true, Marigold, and they tend to fill that hole caused from hating themselves by controlling others...others are not seen as persons in their own right, rather they are seen as something to manipulate and suck off of to fill the hole. One often feels drained after interacting with a person who has Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

[stlshayne]

22 hours ago, Jordan Whitt said:

Nope.  Most days I hate myself.

David Foster Wallace said "There's a lot of narcissism in self-hatred." 

Edited June 28, 2021 by stlshayne
damn typos

[Nova Convair]

No I'm not.
But my avatar is. 😁

[Bree Giffen]

I have an aunt who is a narcissist. During conversations at parties she'd find ways to insert how amazing she is or how her family is great. In the same conversation she would try to minimize the accomplishments mentioned by others or she'd try to one up them. She'd also criticize her kids all the time because they made her look bad. I heard a lot of stories the she was always that way since she was a child. All her kids instantly moved far away as soon as they graduated college.

[BelindaN]

I scored 11/40. Mild tendencies.

HOW DARE THEY!

[Krystina Ferraris]

Oh a massive narcissist.. i plant hundreds in my garden and along all my fields borders 🌼🌼

 

[cunomar]

These are your results on the Narcissistic Personality Inventory.

Your score is 7, out of 40. Higher scores indicate greater levels of narcissism.

 

But then the narcissist I met was quick to play the weak victim whenever things weren't going their way, so i suppose they are perfectly capable of faking the test .

[Mollymews]

1 hour ago, cunomar said:

Narcissistic Personality Inventory.

i did the test at openpsychometrics org  (as if I was my avatar and then as what I think my really self is)

apparently Molly is 26 out of 40 narcissist. Which is higher than 89.2% of the sample set

i did it also as my ownself and got 9 out of 40 (about average).  So is a big gap between my ownself and what I could be if my virtuality was my reality. That whole behind the veil thing

[sirhc DeSantis]

Yes. Next question, peasants

[Paul Hexem]

There's at least 3 other N words to describe me, I hadn't even considered it.

[cunomar]

8 hours ago, Mollymews said:

i did the test at openpsychometrics org  (as if I was my avatar and then as what I think my really self is)

apparently Molly is 26 out of 40 narcissist. Which is higher than 89.2% of the sample set

i did it also as my ownself and got 9 out of 40 (about average).  So is a big gap between my ownself and what I could be if my virtuality was my reality. That whole behind the veil thing

Interesting .

See i don't get that , or rather it doesn't work for me if you see what i mean . I have done lots of things in SL that i will/would never do in RL but my moral compass is part and parcel of who i am , which is to say my sense of right and wrong remains the same .

I guess its because i never had a photoshopped online alter ego .

[Mollymews]

1 hour ago, cunomar said:

Interesting .

See i don't get that , or rather it doesn't work for me if you see what i mean . I have done lots of things in SL that i will/would never do in RL but my moral compass is part and parcel of who i am , which is to say my sense of right and wrong remains the same .

I guess its because i never had a photoshopped online alter ego .

is always interesting these things yes

a thing that comes up in the real world is that we are not always what we present as, or even what we think we are.  Often in the real world we self-condition to give responses that we feel are acceptable to those who can observe us. Family, friends, work colleagues, neighbours, etc. And a result of that self-conditioning is that sometimes we accept/believe that what we think we are is who we are. And is not until we don the veil (anonymity) that we discover things about ourselves that we don't think we are

i just mention also that narcissism is not a moral. Is a clinical disposition, which many of us can suppress. That we can suppress a clinical disposition to narcissism doesn't mean that we are not narcissistic, it just means that we are able to suppress  it, at least in how we present ourselves to others  and how we think about ourselves

 

[cunomar]

Says it all really that several here are happy to call themselves toxic scum deserving of no humane consideration .

[Mollymews]

8 minutes ago, cunomar said:

Says it all really that several here are happy to call themselves toxic scum deserving of no humane consideration .

really ?! rage much

[cunomar]

Aye its a coping mechanism i learned as a kid , it sobers violent drunks astonishingly quickly . A talent forgotten decades ago turns out to be my only sl revelation .

[Maryanne Solo]

No I don't have a nastysiss.
All three of them are wonderful. ❤️
My result was the same as Orwars - nein, nope, nuffin.

[MartinaVaslovik]

Short answer, no.

[BiliEyelash]

The test I took said I was 10 percent narcissistic. Well adjusted with some narcissistic traits.

[Doris Johnsky]

I scored in 12-15 range (mildly narcissistic)

It did add this: "You scored particularly high in authority, suggesting you see yourself as a leader or as someone who values power."

But I am a teacher in RL, so I suppose that's a natural progression in my personality.

[Sukubia Scarmon]

Interessting one.
So, I do have a full blown narcissist in my family. My grandmother! While she is not diagnosed - and likely never will be, as she sees psychiatrists as people who only want your money (you don't directly pay them yourself here), but is convinced a fortuneteller does not (you have to pay them yourself, of course).The difference between them is, the fortuneteller tells you exactly what you want to hear - the psychiatrist tells you what you don't want to hear, heh - it is pretty obvious that she suffers that particulary personality disorder.
(While I am no psychiatrist, I have a natural knack for it, as well as a lot of therapy-time under my belt discussing my family with professionals who all agreed.)

The thing is - most people have narcissistc traits. Almost everyone. Some more pronounced than others. Victims of narcissist more so than others, because the narcs behaviour got normalized. Like Mollymews said, normal people are able to surpress them for the most of it. You just think that's how it is. That the family/friend/partner dynamic is supposed to be that way. The more isolated from others you are, the more internalized that becomes.
That is something I observed with my mother, who does exhibit pronouned narc behaviour. She herself is not a narcissist, tho - she is victim that became an enabler and flying monkey towards me - basically, she trows me under the bus to safe herself from my grandma's temper tantrums. I can tell you, that was not a fun childhood, lol.
So, that leaves me. I do have some pronounced narcissistic traits due to that. It took quite some time to come to see and understand that - but unlike my mother, I actively work against those. 

funfact: I had an uncle I never got to know. For most of my life, they explained his absent as being caused by his wife who forbade him to have contact with his family. It's more likely that he learned that this family is not how a family is supposed to be like that, and chose to cut contact, as many people who came out of the fog tent to do. They either severely limit the contact based on the narcissists behavour, or cut the ties completely. 

Also, no, a narcissist will of course not consider themselfes a narc. In their mind, everything makes perfect sense, is fully reasonal, rational and logical. It's super rare for a narc to accept the diagnose and to make an attempt to change themselves due to that. They are right, no matter what, after all.  Narcissism tests are utter bollocks for that reason as well. 

Also, what Marigold said is very true. Narcissist have extremely low self-esteem, despite appearing as super-confident in themselfes.

Oh, and yes, I cut ties with my grandmother, and mother as well. There's been people who called me heartless and cold and selfish for it, but they'll never understand how much a single narcissist in your life can harm you. Almost all the mental health problems I struggle with today are directly or indirectly caused by my grandmothers narcissism. Since I've severed the ties to them, I have never felt more free and alive. (having an extremely supportive partner helps a lot as well, heh)


 

[Silent Mistwalker]

54 minutes ago, Sukubia Scarmon said:

narc behaviour.

In the US, a narc is a narcotics officer. They use snitches (informers) to narc on people for drugs. At least that's what we called them in the 70s. Narcs and snitches.

[Lancewae Barrowstone]

...partial narcissist,  percent narcissist...  

OKAY!!.. Let’s settle this!  To the OP:  No, you are not a narcissist, just another spoiled brat!

:p

 

OK…OK…. I’ll admit it, I’m one too.  Alright…?  Alright!  Now, get off my back!

[Robin Kiyori]

Temporary return to say that I am kinda unerved by the degree of misinformation and ableism towards NPD sufferers.

They aren't inhuman monsters or 100% always absuers. Or completely in love with themselves. Or any other werid misconception. They are just people who have a mental disorder. They are as varied and multifaceted as any other person and like many other mentally ill person more likely on average to be victims of violence and abuse.

Not to say there aren't any NPD sufferers who aren't also awful people because anyone can be awful. But to claim evey single NPD sufferer is inherently evil is wrong.

 

[Goes back to the void]