Accused of being a child avatar

[Leslie673]

Urrrgh! This makes me so mad! Ok! So, in real life, I am very short; 4'10" to be exact. And I have decided to put my rl size onto my sl avatar. Unfortunately, because of that, I'm being constantly accused of being a child avatar, despite many contradictions otherwise (I mean seriously, how can a child have six babies?)! How can I stop this, because to me, this is discrimination!

 

[Rolig Loon]

That really stinks.  There's nothing you can do about landowners who set those minimum height detectors to weed out child avatars except, of course, add those places to your "I'm Never Going Back There Again" list.  If they don't want you, it's their loss.

[Leslie673]

But my sl brother is there and I like to see him while playing Bingo (that's what they do). 

[Rolig Loon]

Bummer.  Now that really stinks.  Just for the occasion, can you wear elevator shoes or stilts?  Or maybe, can you talk to the landowner and see if he can whitelist you in their system? (Probably not, but it's worth a try.)

[Leslie673]

I highly doubt they will. What's worse is they have the gall to say we're not SL brother and sister SIMPLY because I'm not part of their family. We were both in the same family years ago, but of course things change.

[LittleMe Jewell]

Landowners get to decide who they permit on their land.  You can either play by their rules and temporarily make yourself taller for that area or write the locations off of your list. 

[Rowan Amore]

RL height has never scaled well in SL.  It's better than it used to be but even at almost 6', my avatar is still shorter than a lot of people around me.  At least I can see over the bar!

That being said, as others have commented, their land, their rules.

[Coffee Pancake]

1 hour ago, Leslie673 said:

Urrrgh! This makes me so mad! Ok! So, in real life, I am very short; 4'10" to be exact. And I have decided to put my rl size onto my sl avatar. Unfortunately, because of that, I'm being constantly accused of being a child avatar, despite many contradictions otherwise (I mean seriously, how can a child have six babies?)! How can I stop this, because to me, this is discrimination!

 

RL scale and SL scale are not interchangeable. Blame SL's high camera (probably) .. but we have never been very good at accurately portraying scale.

Accurately scaled buildings have low ceilings and feel cramped, even with an accurately scaled avatar.

Relative scale matters - if you look super short relative to other avatars or your surroundings then regardless of what the measurement says, you're going to have problems.

Under 5' in SL is widely read as under 18, under 4' and it's perilously close to 12. 

 

Sadly the fix is the one thing you probably don't want to do - make your avatar taller. You can still be shorter than everyone else and not trip people's perceptions.

[Wulfie Reanimator]

2 hours ago, Leslie673 said:

Urrrgh! This makes me so mad! Ok! So, in real life, I am very short; 4'10" to be exact. And I have decided to put my rl size onto my sl avatar. Unfortunately, because of that, I'm being constantly accused of being a child avatar, despite many contradictions otherwise (I mean seriously, how can a child have six babies?)! How can I stop this?

Find better people/places to hang out at.

I think people who only care about relative height are pretty dumb small-minded people, unless there are other correlating factors about your avatar. You should include a picture, but the number of "babies" you have doesn't really mean anything in a virtual world. We already have cats and dogs living together and walking on two feet.

I primarily use very short avatars (my main avatar is 150cm or 4'11") and I've almost never been called a child (happens maybe once every 3 years), not even my human avatars which are quite realistically tall (all under 6 feet).

2 hours ago, Leslie673 said:

To me, this is discrimination!

While it could be considered discrimination (depending on your specific circumstances, which we don't know still), that's totally fine in SL and height is not a protected class even in real life. Height discrimination is a form of equal opportunity in sports, or protecting your life in rollercoasters, for example.

Edited June 19, 2021 by Wulfie Reanimator

[Coffee Pancake]

34 minutes ago, Wulfie Reanimator said:

I think people who only care about relative height are pretty dumb small-minded people

When it comes to human avatars, especially in an adult context, that is all that matters. Non human avatars get more of a pass.

It's a stupid hill to get a permaban on and wont garner any sympathy after the fact. Game over, go find another game and new friends.

Is it fair? Not in the slightest, but that is how SL goes and there is no way to put that genie back in the bottle.

[Wulfie Reanimator]

14 minutes ago, Coffee Pancake said:

When it comes to human avatars, especially in an adult context, that is all that matters. Non human avatars get more of a pass.

It's a stupid hill to get a permaban on and wont garner any sympathy after the fact. Game over, go find another game and new friends.

Is it fair? Not in the slightest, but that is how SL goes and there is no way to put that genie back in the bottle.

I don't disagree with your point that simply making your avatar taller is the easiest and safest choice if your main goal is to avoid bans or drama. You're entirely right there. Same about non-humans.

But if your avatar is simply a realistically sized human adult and you don't think there's anything wrong with that, keeping your avatar as-is and searching for places where you are accepted the way you are is what I would consider the best thing to do in the long run, as it will push you toward people who have a similar mindset. (These people exist, I promise.)

I don't condone intentionally going to "no kids" places with your super-short avatars to stand your ground against a group that's not gonna like you. If you are asked to change or leave, you should respectfully do so (that's what I do), it's not a big ask. If the staff operates under a "ban first, warn after" policy, that's a bullet dodged regardless of what the reason was.

OP also hasn't specified if there's anything adult going on. The only context we have is that there's bingo involved.

[PixelBerry]

I think it also depends on how you dress, how mature/young your face looks, breast size, it all comes down to a little bit of everything, even if you say that you are an adult and your character is an adult, but your avatar is wearing lots of pastels, frills, got small breasts or no breasts at all and have a very young looking face, perhaps wearing baby girl themed things, it comes to a point where you end up looking like at least a young teenager and even sometimes a child.

Obliviously breast size should not matter, neither height because there are adult females being short and barely have any chesticles, but then again I think it depends on the rest as well, heck even how you behave, short avatar, small breasts, pinks and frills, young face, baby girl themed items, childish personality, all that combined ends up looking and seeming questionable.

I'm not assuming what you are wearing and all that, I'm just showing examples on perhaps some reasons why people will assume that some are a child or a young teenager because of a combination of things, sometimes the height is not the sole reason for it, giving us a picture of your avatar would probably help us giving you a better answer on what to do, but if the land owner is just super against short people then there really isn't much to do since it is their land and rules.

 

[Rolig Loon]

Most of those automatic systems are simply looking at height,  not breast size and clothing,  which a script can't see anyway. It would actually be easier to get in if a human were making the decisions. 

[Rowan Amore]

The only place I see the auto thing that checks height is at RP regions.  In my experience, it's usually an employee who says something if someone looks too young/short.

[Coffee Pancake]

Region owners err on the side of caution. There is a deeply ingrained fear that one misplaced child sized avatar could bring vengeful Linden gods to smite all.

There are also plenty of users who will aggressively report anyone they feel is undersized. Getting actual messages about it is probably the tip of the iceberg.

[Rowan Amore]

28 minutes ago, xxVi3perxx said:

It depends really on the rules if someone asks you change your avi around then you might as well do it and if banned because you were warned several times its all up to the land / region owners or renters. if your on adult land then you really should pay attention to the rules in regards to LL when it comes to being on those kinds of sims but with moderate or general land it varies. Every sim owner has rules everyone who comes in has to follow them regardless if it seems unfair. At least for my adult RP parcel I have a serious rule on no avatars under 1.30 meters tall if its under that height or looks under that height I send a message to ask someone to change to give them the benefit of the doubt some don't know how to edit shapes for avatars if it looks like a kid well I remove you from the land with no message since my land I rent is adult rated.

There is nothing in the ToS specifically banning child avatars from adult regions.  They just can't be in proximity to adult activity or visuals.  This doesn't mean region owners can't specifically disallow child avatars which many do.  I live on an adult region.  My furniture is all PG.  A child avatar would be allowed in my home.  

 

Are child avatars allowed on Adult regions?

Yes, child avatars are allowed in Adult regions, as long as they are controlled by a person who has verified themselves to be at least 18 years old. However, the avatar should not be in proximity to sexual content or activity; and must obey the policy prohibiting sexual *****.

Since Adult regions by design will often contain sexual content, child avatars should use caution in visiting Adult regions.

[Rolig Loon]

14 minutes ago, xxVi3perxx said:

My thought is as I have learned on a previous platform the avatar looks like a child it isn't allowed period on adult areas. At least that is my opinion on it PG or not I think it shouldn't be allowed. That is what moderate or general places are for with family friendly type places not adult places.

As the land owner, you are free to make that rule for your land if you wish. It's not Linden Lab's rule, though.  As Rowan pointed out, correctly, the TOS does not prohibit child avatars from being in Adult areas. 

[Maitimo]

On 6/19/2021 at 3:06 AM, Leslie673 said:

Urrrgh! This makes me so mad! Ok! So, in real life, I am very short; 4'10" to be exact. And I have decided to put my rl size onto my sl avatar. Unfortunately, because of that, I'm being constantly accused of being a child avatar, despite many contradictions otherwise (I mean seriously, how can a child have six babies?)! How can I stop this, because to me, this is discrimination!

 

SL avatars are on average much taller than people in RL. Being 4'10" in SL is like being 3'10" in RL. My avatar is around 7' tall, which would be freakish in RL. In SL, I'm often not even the tallest person in a group.

If you want to avoid being banned from almost everywhere except child-specific regions, you will need to make your avatar taller.  It's not discrimination because unlike RL, you have the ability to make your avatar taller. If you are absolutely insistent on staying at 4'10" then you will need to accept the consequences of that decision.

 

 

[Claireschen Hesten]

I'm 4'10" - 4'9" in RL too potential accusations of being a child are one of the reasons i've never decided to reflect my RL height in SL the other reason i can be tall in SL so why would i want to be a midget when i don't have to be. as long as people associate age with height i don't think you'll stop the accusations

 

[WereBeast Alpha]

15 hours ago, Rowan Amore said:

There is nothing in the ToS specifically banning child avatars from adult regions.  They just can't be in proximity to adult activity or visuals.  This doesn't mean region owners can't specifically disallow child avatars which many do.  I live on an adult region.  My furniture is all PG.  A child avatar would be allowed in my home.  

 

Are child avatars allowed on Adult regions?

Yes, child avatars are allowed in Adult regions, as long as they are controlled by a person who has verified themselves to be at least 18 years old. However, the avatar should not be in proximity to sexual content or activity; and must obey the policy prohibiting sexual *****.

Since Adult regions by design will often contain sexual content, child avatars should use caution in visiting Adult regions.

 

My thought is as I have learned on a previous platform the avatar looks like a child it isn't allowed period on adult areas. At least that is my opinion on it PG or not I think it shouldn't be allowed. That is what moderate or general places are for with family friendly type places not adult places.

[WereBeast Alpha]

It depends really on the rules if someone asks you change your avi around then you might as well do it and if banned because you were warned several times its all up to the land / region owners or renters. if your on adult land then you really should pay attention to the rules in regards to LL when it comes to being on those kinds of sims but with moderate or general land it varies. Every sim owner has rules everyone who comes in has to follow them regardless if it seems unfair. At least for my adult RP parcel I have a serious rule on no avatars under 1.30 meters tall if its under that height or looks under that height I send a message to ask someone to change to give them the benefit of the doubt some don't know how to edit shapes for avatars if it looks like a kid well I remove you from the land with no message since my land I rent is adult rated.