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Hi everyone! This is something I've been thinking about recently. 

Do you believe it's still possible to find genuine connections in SL? Nowadays, it seems that people's interests lie mainly in creating and/or blogging. They also prefer to keep their circles small. 

I don't think there are any issues with this at all, as everyone is free to form a Second Life that best suits them. 

I'm curious to know your thoughts and whether this has changed over the years. 

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Great topic question AutumnSu, or as Shakespeare wrote, "to connect or not to connect?"  That is the question.   My experience in world these past few years is that there are many ways to connect with people in meaningful ways through shared experiences and activities.  I find having a close circle of friends (5 or 6) works best for me in keeping up with their lives and "connecting" on a regular basis, however, I have one acquaintance in SL who has 50 friends!

One group of people i have met in SL is the anti-Facebook crowd.  These are individuals who reject RL social media for SL social media.  They typically have business interests in SL, or are land owners who have customers and tenants that they interact with and provide services.  Many of these individuals use SL as a way to connect through commerce and chat groups in SL and some do not even have a RL Facebook page.  Never saw that coming😀

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1 hour ago, Jace2112 said:

Great topic question AutumnSu, or as Shakespeare wrote, "to connect or not to connect?"  That is the question.   My experience in world these past few years is that there are many ways to connect with people in meaningful ways through shared experiences and activities.  I find having a close circle of friends (5 or 6) works best for me in keeping up with their lives and "connecting" on a regular basis, however, I have one acquaintance in SL who has 50 friends!

One group of people i have met in SL is the anti-Facebook crowd.  These are individuals who reject RL social media for SL social media.  They typically have business interests in SL, or are land owners who have customers and tenants that they interact with and provide services.  Many of these individuals use SL as a way to connect through commerce and chat groups in SL and some do not even have a RL Facebook page.  Never saw that coming😀

I have to admit that I'm the same way! 😅 I'm not a user of RL Facebook but I have one for SL. Though in my case, it has only helped slightly in connecting with other Residents. This is the main reason as to why I thought about this topic to begin with. Many of them are bloggers and creators, so much of their time is spent doing that.

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10 hours ago, AutumnSu said:

Hi everyone! This is something I've been thinking about recently. 

Do you believe it's still possible to find genuine connections in SL? Nowadays, it seems that people's interests lie mainly in creating and/or blogging. They also prefer to keep their circles small. 

I don't think there are any issues with this at all, as everyone is free to form a Second Life that best suits them. 

I'm curious to know your thoughts and whether this has changed over the years. 

Good morning!

I think you have a point when you say that SL is changing. I mean, the way I see it, it is still possible to connect, but whereas before that was the main aim of people coming into SL, it might be true that nowadays the mainstream position is that of bloggers and creators, as you point out.

Being around since 2007, I have seen many trends come and go, and I hope to be able to see many more. But there is a bunch of people who enjoy meeting really interesting people, maybe connecting with them, and becoming Friends (uppercase). I know people with lists comprising so many people that it is truly impossible to keep up with them all. I agree with Jace that it is better to have a small number of them to be able to really make significant connections.

Oh, and by the way, here’s another one who doesn’t have Facebook or Instagram or such things. I know, I am a weirdo...

Have a great day!

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Depends where you go. At hangouts it’s almost the contrary... people do little else but to try & connect, sometimes so broadly that you can tell they’re not being selective enough to care if there is, or will be, any meaningful connection through the seemingly random offers. But they’re still great places to stay at, waiting for the good ones. I spend most of my time at London City, one of the best.

Nothing much that I can see has changed thru the years, in this sense. At most, big hangouts aren’t easy to maintain, and some do close eventually.

Edited by Ren Toxx
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   Probably.

   Depends on how you define a 'genuine connection'; people have different expectations from SL and their interactions through it. You certainly can find people who wants the same things you do, with whom you can connect in various ways.

   Personally I spend 98.7% of my time on my photo platform by myself, still I have a fair amount of people with whom I have excellent, lasting connections. Works for me!

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I absolutely have connections I feel are genuine through second life-- but the type of connection varies. A good writing partner in a roleplay is a connection in a creative level. I have friends I connect with on an emotional level. I also have outside of SL friends who use SL these days with me as a means of connecting and doing things together while we cannot visit.

I wouldn't say this is any easier or harder than previous years to make friends in SL. I would say, as a baseline, it's never been easy. Second life has a lot of folks who want to stay in their bubble and have distrust for anything outside of it. 

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Yes, absolutely. I have friendships I have maintained for over 14 years. I find though that the more genuine connections that I have extend to communicating in other ways outside of SL, although they are still online connections they are more "real life". I have a means of contacting most of my true friends if they suddenly disappear from SL. Like all of us, I have had people I like or care about suddenly disappear from SL and been left wondering where they have gone, with no way to contact them. While I worry about them, sometimes that also leaves me questioning the significance of the relationship.

And I can't imagine, for example, calling a relationship that was solely based on roleplaying in SL a genuine connection. That sort of thing for me is just make believe. Depending on the amount of time invested though it may well feel like a significant connection, I know people get pretty heavily into that whole family thing, and I suppose you could get swept away by a roleplaying romance too, like reading a romance novel, a grand fantasy. I have a roleplay alt I play very occasionally, she is not me, she is superficial so I avoid making friendships on her because I feel disingenuous. I suppose those who never combine SL and RL (how you do that, I do not know) may not worry about such things. 

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On 2/16/2021 at 1:19 PM, AutumnSu said:

Hi everyone! This is something I've been thinking about recently. 

Do you believe it's still possible to find genuine connections in SL? Nowadays, it seems that people's interests lie mainly in creating and/or blogging. They also prefer to keep their circles small. 

I don't think there are any issues with this at all, as everyone is free to form a Second Life that best suits them. 

I'm curious to know your thoughts and whether this has changed over the years. 

I believe its a good thing to find connections of all sorts, I have friends whom I hangout with on a weekly or daily basis but I expand if I find people I connect with. Besides roleplaying I go to clubs and sometimes explore different sims to see what its all like. Finding the right people with similar interests may seem hard but on SL there are limitless types of people around not hard to find for a good chat. 

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Connections come in many types, it all depends on the type of connection and the people involved. In SL people come here for diverse reasons and that makes forming lasting connections difficult. If you find someone who sees SL like you do however, a true connection is possible.

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I am quite new to SL (Very new actually lol) , and have been looking at other residents' profile, some of them have very IC profiles, some are more causal. But I am a little scared to say hello to them when I am inworld as it seems in SL everyone concerns privacy a lot ? If I start talking to someone (such as your jacket looks lovely on you will already get you reported?)

How should I start a conversation to them ? Or I gotta join groups/community before connecting with people ?

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55 minutes ago, SuraCiel said:

I am quite new to SL (Very new actually lol) , and have been looking at other residents' profile, some of them have very IC profiles, some are more causal. But I am a little scared to say hello to them when I am inworld as it seems in SL everyone concerns privacy a lot ? If I start talking to someone (such as your jacket looks lovely on you will already get you reported?)

How should I start a conversation to them ? Or I gotta join groups/community before connecting with people ?

Here is something I wrote in another thread where someone was asking about making friends (so I am quoting myself !):

 

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5 hours ago, SuraCiel said:

I am quite new to SL (Very new actually lol) , and have been looking at other residents' profile, some of them have very IC profiles, some are more causal. But I am a little scared to say hello to them when I am inworld as it seems in SL everyone concerns privacy a lot ? If I start talking to someone (such as your jacket looks lovely on you will already get you reported?)

How should I start a conversation to them ? Or I gotta join groups/community before connecting with people ?

Someone would have to be a real jerk, and not worth talking to at all, to be offended by a compliment about their virtual clothing. Just like in the real world, SL is full of all types and some people are more approachable than others. Some people are not worth your time. You have worked out already that profiles can be a good way to determine that. Just be yourself and be friendly. You're new so a conversation topic could be asking them if they have ideas of nice places you could visit in SL, based on your interests. Steer clear of any personal real life questions with those you don't know. My personal experience is that it really sucks having a friendly chat with a new person and they suddenly start asking you a heap of questions about your real life. 

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I make most of my SL friends through randomly IMing and complimenting their outfits. It's how you say it, I guess. I've made genuine connections. I am myself in SL and look for people who are also themselves. I can't really get close to someone who's super private or "SL does not interfere with RL" in their bio. I feel things intensely, and treat SL just as I would communicating with anybody over the internet - it's no different than if I met someone face-to-face.

 

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Thank you all the suggestions ! I asked this because there was once I saw someone with an outfit (I should not use outfit, because there are all kinds of effect, flying prims around him) For someone who is very new, it is like watching a Demon Lord teleporting through a portal with sound effect and a complexity of 400000 (Like power gauge !!!!!!) I play other games but have no idea SL will let you build your character like that

So I tried to look at his profile, it said

*I know you are watching me, but you cant steal my style*

I know he said that to everyone but that makes me a little scared lol , but with everyone's ideas I will try another approach now !

 

Edited by SuraCiel
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1 hour ago, SuraCiel said:

Thank you all the suggestions ! I asked this because there was once I saw someone with an outfit (I should not use outfit, because there are all kinds of effect, flying prims around him) For someone who is very new, it is like watching a Demon Lord teleporting through a portal with sound effect and a complexity of 400000 (Like power gauge !!!!!!) I play other games but have no idea SL will let you build your character like that

So I tried to look at his profile, it said

*I know you are watching me, but you cant steal my style*

I know he said that to everyone but that makes me a little scared lol , but with everyone's ideas I will try another approach now !

 

Look me up inworld, I can pass you a HUD that will scan & list everything an avatar is wearing & only you see the results of said scan. 

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Greetings,

The connections and relationships in SL, are just like the RL. You must have patience, perseverance and time, to find the people that you will have chemistry between you and them. Just travel, talk with many people without be afraid, enjoy the SL and have fun...and then, you will find the genuine connections  ☺️

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6 hours ago, SuraCiel said:

Thank you all the suggestions ! I asked this because there was once I saw someone with an outfit (I should not use outfit, because there are all kinds of effect, flying prims around him) For someone who is very new, it is like watching a Demon Lord teleporting through a portal with sound effect and a complexity of 400000 (Like power gauge !!!!!!) I play other games but have no idea SL will let you build your character like that

So I tried to look at his profile, it said

*I know you are watching me, but you cant steal my style*

I know he said that to everyone but that makes me a little scared lol , but with everyone's ideas I will try another approach now !

 

A lot of people in dress-up games are really concerned about "not being copied". Jokes on them, I always find a way to find out what someone's wearing... >:) There are HUDs you can use to scan an avatar's outfit and find the exact items, haha. 

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Thank you for telling me there are HUDs !

(Hand on Chin) I have no intention to copy them lol ! With so many shops here (Although I see some of them are very similar), and there are bloggers to give us ideas on different styles

I like to read the profile because I like to connect one's appearance to their profile stories, it is like the book cover and the content lol It helps me to understand someone before starting a conversation, and after about a month in SL, I feel that it is quite different from other games (More real !)

And !!!!!!!! Some guys asked me am I single / do I have partner in SL, does it matter?

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2 hours ago, SuraCiel said:

Thank you for telling me there are HUDs !

(Hand on Chin) I have no intention to copy them lol ! With so many shops here (Although I see some of them are very similar), and there are bloggers to give us ideas on different styles

I like to read the profile because I like to connect one's appearance to their profile stories, it is like the book cover and the content lol It helps me to understand someone before starting a conversation, and after about a month in SL, I feel that it is quite different from other games (More real !)

And !!!!!!!! Some guys asked me am I single / do I have partner in SL, does it matter?

I always read profiles, too.  If someone messages me, it's the first thing I do before I even look to see who it is.

If a guy messages you, asking if you're single or partnered, it tells you 2 things most of the time.  #1 He hasn't read your profile  #2  He might just be looking for the "sexy time".

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On 2/23/2021 at 8:17 AM, SuraCiel said:

Thank you all the suggestions ! I asked this because there was once I saw someone with an outfit (I should not use outfit, because there are all kinds of effect, flying prims around him) For someone who is very new, it is like watching a Demon Lord teleporting through a portal with sound effect and a complexity of 400000 (Like power gauge !!!!!!) I play other games but have no idea SL will let you build your character like that

So I tried to look at his profile, it said

*I know you are watching me, but you cant steal my style*

I know he said that to everyone but that makes me a little scared lol , but with everyone's ideas I will try another approach now !

 

I am a profile lurker because it gives me insight into the Avatar. I look for interesting or funny.   

 

When I see the ones like you describe I ignore them unless it offends me in some fashion at which point i make a rude remark and the fight is on.

 

Having said all that if I get a random IM i will respond politely unless it is "Do you want to have sex"  At which point I reply   "You can't afford me"

 

That all makes me sound like an awful person but I'm not.  I met my SL wife in an IM.

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On 2/23/2021 at 10:17 PM, SuraCiel said:

it is like watching a Demon Lord teleporting through a portal with sound effect and a complexity of 400000

 

On 2/23/2021 at 10:17 PM, SuraCiel said:

*I know you are watching me, but you cant steal my style*


Who wants to steal someones *****ty a$$ avatar anyway lmao

Avoid the ones who try to project and sound all that LordDarkEdgecoreMasterBate beeyatchness, there are many healthy and genuinely meaningful connections to be found on SL

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