Adamburp Adamczyk Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 38 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said: Posts can only be edited within 24 hours - after that you've only the option to report the post and ask a moderator to delete it. You could perhaps ask for this topic to be locked and start afresh with a new title - the one you want - and with the new topic explained. Garnet has a LOT of common sense ideas. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jordyn McGregor Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Orwar is a person who responds to respond, not to discuss. These types should be ignored until something useful comes out of them. Yes @Orwar responds. After all, isn't that the whole point of forum boards? To post something in the hope it elicits responses, conversation and debate. More often than not, his posts do exactly that...like them or loathe them. 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: All this being said, I wrote him personally, to be kind, and explain that I changed my mind because of him, harsh or not... but he did not even have the tact to answer me at all... Sticking with the topic...only a complete narcissist would think someone is just hanging out waiting for your messages! People DO have real lives. He hasn't been around, so I doubt he even knows you have messaged him. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 18 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said: 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: All this being said, I wrote him personally, to be kind, and explain that I changed my mind because of him, harsh or not... but he did not even have the tact to answer me at all... Sticking with the topic...only a complete narcissist would think someone is just hanging out waiting for your messages! People DO have real lives. He hasn't been around, so I doubt he even knows you have messaged him. abusive and uncalled for, Jordan 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Many of you made suggestions I forgot to mention that there are numerous groups, some with a parcel or even an entire region, that deal with various conditions in society where people are attempting to heal. Could be they might funnel some people to your group, or even have ideas. I designed regions for some of them, but I'm not sure but one still exists, and I don't even remember her name...otherwise I'd provide some destinations. But if you try Search inworld for various conditions you might discover a few good resources. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adamburp Adamczyk Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: So I can finally respond to this post well! I feel I should respond for ORWAR first, who has not graced us with a response, because Orwar is a person who responds to respond, not to discuss. These types should be ignored until something useful comes out of them. This is not to say he is useless in general, he has many posts and he is even funny. He has a good sense of humor, and is intelligent enough. All this being said, I wrote him personally, to be kind, and explain that I changed my mind because of him, harsh or not... but he did not even have the tact to answer me at all... Let us just be at peace with this for now. Perhaps he will show up at a later date.... I decided to change the original post from Females only to Everyone for a few reasons, and some other edits/ additions 1. being that one of my Fave things about SL, is the fact that you can BE ANYTHING, not just anyone, but ANYTHING. requiring knowledge of Gender would ruin this, for me and others. 2. New and beautiful gender discoveries are happening every day, and I would not want any hesitation pertaining to this subject, to stand in the way of someone finding a place to feel safe and talk. That is not who I want to be, so you be who you want to be. Relationships will evolve as they should, and naturally. Gender will not even be questioned. 3. I will also be editing the post to be PARENTAL ABUSE for now. There were suggestions that Narcissism is not widely diagnosed/ many don't know this is what is happening, so in order to be even more inclusive, I will be making this edit. 4. I will edit to include the kinds of activities I hope to lead/teach, and a few types of leaders/teachers we might have use for as well. I thank all of you for your input, tolerations, and interest. Many of you made suggestions I hope it is clear I was listening, if not, write me or post again. Sorry I am not a born leader or anything, I love to teach and share but I have never run a group or implemented something people might rely in the way this might go. I am nervous, and I am excited, and I just want to help, and in the process, help myself too... As I said I edited a bunch so , re-read, and criticize away! I can take it. I need it. Just do what I do, and many others do, as per the standard Governance advice - mute those who just try to hijack your thread, you'll feel a lot better. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jordyn McGregor Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 7 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: abusive and uncalled for, Jordan 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 (edited) 39 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: 58 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said: 2 hours ago, Elyse Gaspara said: All this being said, I wrote him personally, to be kind, and explain that I changed my mind because of him, harsh or not... but he did not even have the tact to answer me at all... Sticking with the topic...only a complete narcissist would think someone is just hanging out waiting for your messages! People DO have real lives. He hasn't been around, so I doubt he even knows you have messaged him. Expand abusive and uncalled for, Jordan Not at all. A simple statement of opinion on what sort of person would expect a quick response from someone in a virtual world, as if expecting them to always be around in order to respond while not knowing whether or not said person has even seen the message. Edited February 9, 2021 by LittleMe Jewell spelling 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 1 hour ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Orwar is a person who responds to respond, not to discuss. These types should be ignored until something useful comes out of them. This is not to say he is useless in general, he has many posts and he is even funny. He has a good sense of humor, and is intelligent enough. All this being said, I wrote him personally, to be kind, and explain that I changed my mind because of him, harsh or not... but he did not even have the tact to answer me at all... Let us just be at peace with this for now. Perhaps he will show up at a later date.... I didn't feel obliged to discuss the subject any further; the main point of this thread appeared to be of little interest, and your immediate surrender concerning your 'females preferred' statement seemed to point out that my initial call-out was both correct and successful. Thus, there was nothing left for me to discuss. Now .. How you find yourself to be in any position to judge my character and publish your personal conclusion about my person does raise something quite interesting one might consider discussing; how self-centered you are, to think that you are in any way entitled to my time to compose a response to a PM that had a composition which's tone brought to mind the fourth stage of inebriation. I obviously can't divulge too much of the content of said PM with respect to the rules, suffice to say I did not find it worthwhile to spend my time to compose a response. I, personally, don't find narcissism must necessarily be an unfavourable trait; the world isn't binary, 'good and bad' are matters of perspective, and I'd pick a touch of narcissism above people with a saviour complex any day. How you manage to be both, however, that really is quite fascinating. A tale comes to mind, distantly, wherein a fox convinces the farmer to hire him to watch his chickens. Or was it a wolf and a shepherd. Either way, I'm not the kind of person to consider myself a 'victim' or 'survivor' of my parents, in spite of whatever flaws they may have; nor would I, if I were, seek support from someone who themselves appear to display the very same flaws. But then, I'm a picky consumer. 5 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elyse Gaspara Posted February 9, 2021 Author Share Posted February 9, 2021 (edited) Well color me kind and you NOT... Orwar, at this point i am disintereted in you completely. your history and statements everywhere show you as you wish... I have no energy for your type of "discussion" , and never will. thank you for your input. You are correct, you are not needed here. lol My feelings aren't hurt. You people who hope so, will find yourselves wasting your energy. please don't. I am a professional troll killer...haha with what I have been through, SL griefers are my ab fave !! There's no telling whats going on in there... no tellling. I assume the worst and let them be As for other peeps who made comments, if what you said was in ANY way accusatory, or rude, believe me you've ALREADY been ignored. its not that hard. this post has outlived its use. I have learned more and changed some things, and been advised to begin again. Than is what I am going to do. I have met one possible person interested so far, so.... I don''t quit. THANK YOU YOU ARE ALL VERY SWEET ( even orwar who really was an UNNECESSARY jerk to me ) ( I mean, don't we all know by know that bullying and bull***** is wrong??) Its black and white people! Never gray Edited February 9, 2021 by Elyse Gaspara 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 11 minutes ago, Elyse Gaspara said: this post has outlived its use Yes I'm afraid so Let's just hope there were many others who read the thread but didn't comment, perhaps needing your project, and contacting you inworld. Truly, I'm embarrassed to be a member of this forum 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orwar Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 4 minutes ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Well color me kind and you NOT... Orwar, at this point i am disintereted in you completely. your history and statements everywhere show you as you wish... For being completely disinterested in me, you sure seem to be looking a lot at my history, and spend a lot of time profiling me. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adamburp Adamczyk Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 43 minutes ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Well color me kind and you NOT... Orwar, at this point i am disintereted in you completely. your history and statements everywhere show you as you wish... I have no energy for your type of "discussion" , and never will. thank you for your input. You are correct, you are not needed here. lol My feelings aren't hurt. You people who hope so, will find yourselves wasting your energy. please don't. I am a professional troll killer...haha with what I have been through, SL griefers are my ab fave !! There's no telling whats going on in there... no tellling. I assume the worst and let them be As for other peeps who made comments, if what you said was in ANY way accusatory, or rude, believe me you've ALREADY been ignored. its not that hard. this post has outlived its use. I have learned more and changed some things, and been advised to begin again. Than is what I am going to do. I have met one possible person interested so far, so.... I don''t quit. THANK YOU YOU ARE ALL VERY SWEET ( even orwar who really was an UNNECESSARY jerk to me ) ( I mean, don't we all know by know that bullying and bull***** is wrong??) Its black and white people! Never gray read my post above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rowan Amore Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 We ALL know who's the real bully. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: We ALL know who's the real bully. Jeez, Rowan, you've allowed yourself to be absorbed by the Borg. I thought better of you...in the beginning... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted February 9, 2021 Share Posted February 9, 2021 28 minutes ago, RowanMinx said: We ALL know who's the real bully. Santa Claus. I never did get my pony even after being good all year. 3 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 1 hour ago, Garnet Psaltery said: Santa Claus. I never did get my pony even after being good all year. @Grumpity Lindenwas supposed to be following up on the Pony deliveries. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talligurl Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 4 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: Truly, I'm embarrassed to be a member of this forum Then why do you stay? I wouldn't stay if I found the whole thing embarrassing. I mean sometimes my family embarrasses me, but I am stuck with them, but no one is stuck with these forums, The fact you do stay tells me you are not "truly embarrassed" but instead just being overly dramatic. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 2 hours ago, Talligurl said: 6 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: Truly, I'm embarrassed to be a member of this forum Then why do you stay? I wouldn't stay if I found the whole thing embarrassing. I mean sometimes my family embarrasses me, but I am stuck with them, but no one is stuck with these forums, The fact you do stay tells me you are not "truly embarrassed" but instead just being overly dramatic. If we left every group or gathering on the planet where a few insensitive asshats resided we would never be a member of any group whatsoever. And I am truly embarrassed -- I've had friends ask me why I participate in the forum as they left long ago or stuck a toe in and backed out quick. I try to tell them that it's just a few who are such asshats and that they should ignore them, block them, and pay attention to the considerate people, but seems once bitten they do not return. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talligurl Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 8 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: ignore them, block them, and pay attention to the considerate people You on thr other hand seem to enjoy poking them with a stick. Hey, I get it, I do my own share of poking, it can be a lot of fun. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 (edited) 3 hours ago, Talligurl said: 11 hours ago, Luna Bliss said: ignore them, block them, and pay attention to the considerate people You on thr other hand seem to enjoy poking them with a stick. Hey, I get it, I do my own share of poking, it can be a lot of fun. You think I have enjoyed 'poking people' on this thread, simply attempting to rile people up whom I disagree with? Absolutely not. I have attempted to defend an abused person although I actually did not confront much in this case as it seemed a bit pointless due to the general lack of awareness among those who were so unsympathetic to the OP. A person who grew up with a bonified NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) mother, endured some of the worst abuse we can imagine being forced to deal with in life. I could opine on this for pages and pages, but basically they had a mother who was unable to provide the most basic of needs a child has that enables them to develop the needed sense of self which enables someone to cope with the demands of life.. Lots of extreme emotional, if not physical, abuse is part of it. If I had the talent and time to describe it adequately anyone with any humanity left or a heart would cry. The OP did not deserve forum members telling her she was narcissistic herself, or the 'real bully' in the thread, or slammed for her lack of writing ability, or weird for looking to others who had the same condition in an attempt to heal. She was a new person coming to this forum looking for help -- that's a vulnerable place to be in, both asking for help in and of itself as well as not knowing the forum 'rules' or being at the mercy of how the forum members might treat her -- that puts her at a disadvantage. We are in an advantageous position as regulars, we have most of the power, and whenever one has power they should treat those with less power in a sensitive and sympathetic manner. I hate power abuse, and I tend to confront it if I see it and if too severe -- that's not 'poking people for fun'. Edited February 10, 2021 by Luna Bliss 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talligurl Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 36 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said: I have attempted to defend an abused person Oh come on, Orwar simply made a suggestion and you jumped in and attacked him. If anyonr got abused in thid thread it is because you started stirring up trouble from the start. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madelaine McMasters Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 22 hours ago, Elyse Gaspara said: Aaaaand, I cant figure out how to edit.... "Edit" is in the ellipsis menu at the top right of your post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said: You think I have enjoyed 'poking people' YES 1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said: I have attempted to defend an abused person LOL - that is completely ludicrous. It is nothing more than your normal White Knighting for some perceived injustice. 2 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Luna Bliss Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 31 minutes ago, Talligurl said: 1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said: I have attempted to defend an abused person Oh come on, Orwar simply made a suggestion and you jumped in and attacked him. If anyonr got abused in thid thread it is because you started stirring up trouble from the start. Haha, so typical...the one who points out the insensitivity toward a new forum poster is blamed for the ensuing conflict. And I forgot that one -- accusing the OP of being a sexist for needing a 'woman only' group -- no doubt if I read the thread again I'll find more insults to the OP. Orwar accused her of being a sexist when she simply wanted to create the group in a way she had found beneficial in past therapy groups -- women only. I can't blame Orwar for not understanding how comfort and safety is of prime importance when trying to heal, and that groups always comprise themselves in ways to create safety in the same way that when we seek therapy it is generally asked from the get-go if we prefer a male or female therapist. I doubt he has much experience with healing and therapy groups, especially ones in the U.S., so how could he know -- and that's why I say I didn't confront very much...just enough to show I supported the OP in creating the group however she needed. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Love Zhaoying Posted February 10, 2021 Share Posted February 10, 2021 (edited) My mother said "You will only ever have one mother", despite knowing I had a stepmother, and am a mother worshipper (Hindu). Does that count as narcissistic? Edited February 10, 2021 by Love Zhaoying 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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