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Hangout places for adults that are NOT sex related?


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So I don't know if its just me, but I've noticed almost every sim catering to adults is always sex related or adjacent in some form. I was wondering if any place exists for adult avatars that aren't catering towards sex or fetishes, just offering a fun, chill place to relax. And no, I'm not talking about a dance club either. If such a place doesn't yet exist, my hope was to eventually create a place for people to hang out that's quiet, where you can actually talk and hear yourself think without music pumping overhead. I love cute stuff, pastel colors, and anime but that sort of thing seems to indicate a baby-girl type sim which I don't want either. Can anyone offer some ideas or inspiration for me to look for? I'm tired of seeing every Adult place in Second Life being a strip club, fetish sim, BDSM place, you get the idea.

 

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Eat at Joe's. My little cafe in Zindra, at the corner of Charlesville and Kama Center. Free 20 minute parking out back. Well lit at night. I sometimes meet people here to talk business. I have so

Come and hang out at Mount Campion National Forest.  We have a huge natural area of forests, canyons, trails, and caves in a high alpine setting.  The community is great too, there are events and usua

There are actually a fair number of places that cater to non-sexual socialization, but they can be difficult to find. A lot of the ones I use are clubs -- the fact that they involve dancing and music

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There are actually a fair number of places that cater to non-sexual socialization, but they can be difficult to find. A lot of the ones I use are clubs -- the fact that they involve dancing and music is actually (for me) a bonus, rather than a drawback, and the best ones have created for themselves a dynamic and active community.

However, if trying clubs isn't your thing, I'd start with The Shelter, which, although primarily billed as a place for noobs, hosts a pretty diverse range of people, and is quite popular. It is also explicitly non-sexual.

http://maps.secondlife.com/secondlife/Isabel/37/223/81

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7 minutes ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

So I don't know if its just me, but I've noticed almost every sim catering to adults is always sex related or adjacent in some form. I was wondering if any place exists for adult avatars that aren't catering towards sex or fetishes, just offering a fun, chill place to relax. And no, I'm not talking about a dance club either. If such a place doesn't yet exist, my hope was to eventually create a place for people to hang out that's quiet, where you can actually talk and hear yourself think without music pumping overhead. I love cute stuff, pastel colors, and anime but that sort of thing seems to indicate a baby-girl type sim which I don't want either. Can anyone offer some ideas or inspiration for me to look for? I'm tired of seeing every Adult place in Second Life being a strip club, fetish sim, BDSM place, you get the idea.

 

Why does it have to be Adult?  I don't quite understand that.

My best advice I gave to another person...consider becoming a Premium Member and begin hanging out with the regulars where you live where it would be just like a real neighborhood with people you could get to know.   I'm sure it's mostly all adult there.

As far as an Adult hang-out on Adult land that isn't sex oriented, I'm not sure why it has to be on Adult land or Adult category.  Could you give more information.

As far as if you want a fun place to hang out, Raglan Shire.  Raglan Shire is considered home to many tinies but all avatars are welcome including human as long as they are clothed.  Tinies are small tiny avatar humanimals like Dinkies for example which are a walking domestic cat.  

Edited by FairreLilette
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Just now, FairreLilette said:

Why does it have to be Adult?  I don't quite understand that.

My best advice I gave to another person...consider becoming a Premium Member and begin hanging out with the regulars where you live where it would be just like a real neighborhood with people you could get to know.   I'm sure it's mostly all adult there.

As far as an Adult on Adult land that isn't sex oriented, I'm not sure why it has to be on Adult land or Adult category.  Could you give more information.

As far as if you want a fun place to hang out, Raglan Shire.  Raglan Shire is considered home to many tinies but all avatars are welcome including human as long as they are clothed.  Tinies are small tiny avatar humanimals like Dinkies for example which are a walking domestic cat.  

One, I'm not paying for premium as honestly it isn't worth it for the cost. Two, I would like an Adult sim because to put it plain, I don't want little kid avatars running around, especially at a place meant for adults to come socialize and interact with people their own age.

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1 minute ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

One, I'm not paying for premium as honestly it isn't worth it for the cost. Two, I would like an Adult sim because to put it plain, I don't want little kid avatars running around, especially at a place meant for adults to come socialize and interact with people their own age.

Okay, avoid child avatars...I thought that might be the reason.

Hmmmm...well, you need to spell everything out that is allowed and not allowed in your advert.  As far as ideas for an Adult hang-out that is not sexually orientated or not a club...just a chill place...perhaps make builds and get them into Editor's Picks for explorers and photographers and/or a cafe is the best I can think of at the moment.  

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Eat at Joe's. My little cafe in Zindra, at the corner of Charlesville and Kama Center. Free 20 minute parking out back. Well lit at night. I sometimes meet people here to talk business.

I have some demo NPCs moving through there. They'll say hello when you show up, to be polite, and then go on with what they're doing. So the place looks busy.

Linden Lab has a nice outdoor cafe about 100m away, in Bronlen, in a Linden park. Bronlen also has a 24-hour co-working space and cafeteria and a tiny cafe with a jukebox.

SL has no shortage of little places to hang out.

 

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I'm not sure where you've been but to my mind, there just are not that many child avatars running around SL that it's a problem. And even then, the child avatars are really adults that just enjoy pretending to be children.  So I'm not sure why excluding child avs is so important.  As for "their own age" the age range of people in SL equals anyone over the age of 18, and you really can't tell how old anyone is based on their avatar. One thing that music clubs manage quite well is bringing people together with similar tastes.  Some might say that your musical tastes can identify your age group better than the look of your avatar. As for not liking the sound, you have total control of how loud the sound is or if you want to listen to it at all.

If you want to have non-sexual adult conversation then forget about adult sims, those are mostly for adults that want sex. There's other things in SL besides music clubs, sex clubs and shopping. I would go to the places that you like and talk with the people who make them.  If they have a group, join it, if they need volunteers, volunteer. Do the things you are interested in and you will find people that are interesting to you as well.

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We're all adults here.  When you do a search for something of interest such as chat hotspots, just untick the "adult" box.  Adult generally means adult activities are allowed.  The others are also for adults just not sexually oriented.  I rarely run into child avatars except when I'm shopping to be honest.

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2 hours ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

 I don't want little kid avatars running around, especially at a place meant for adults to come socialize and interact with people their own age.

Child avatars are able to be on Adult land. 

Your chances of meeting one on adult land at a none sex/sex adjacent hangout are vastly higher than at a sex/sex adjacent one.

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2 hours ago, Coffee Pancake said:

Child avatars are able to be on Adult land. 

Your chances of meeting one on adult land at a none sex/sex adjacent hangout are vastly higher than at a sex/sex adjacent one.

I was waiting for someone to say this because it's true.  I was under the assumption they want their own land or build since they were asking for "inspiration and ideas".  So, I'm not really sure.  That's why I asked why Adult land when they can go to non-sexual places all over.  

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6 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

I built one.

90% of the people that show up complain because there's no sex, and then leave.

It often fascinates me how different one's SL experience can be from that of others.

I travel around a fair bit, to clubs, chat spots, beautifully built sims, shopping places, even rp sims sometimes . . . and I almost never run across actual sex. I get hit on occasionally, but . . . the sex bit really just doesn't pop up that often. And it's not like I'm consciously avoiding it, either.

ETA: And to reinforce something Rowan, I think, said, I rarely run across child avatars outside of shopping.

Edited by Scylla Rhiadra
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4 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

I used to hold Friday night discussion groups and I may do that again but they are griefed mercilessly, including by Linden alts.

How do you know they were Linden alts?

The only time I've run into grief from "company accounts" was when a group of ProductEngine accounts a few years ago thought it was funny to raid a sandbox I adminned and shoot guests with giant physics and continued to do so from outside of banlines once they were banned.

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4 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

Live Music can be better, but here, too, idiots with gestures, etc. 

It's too bad nobody has a club that bans gestures and graphics in chat, that would improve the experience immensely. 

This is one area that I can agree with. Are you there to enjoy the music, or are are you there to play the fool, spam chat with picture characters, destroy the soundtrack and make a huge nuisance of yourself? If the latter, you shouldn't be there.

 

4 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

truth to tell, they are often empty.

Why? Because somebody turns up, finds nobody there and leaves. Then somebody turns up and finds nobody there and leaves...... ad nauseum.

When the "somebody should have made sure there were people here for me" mentality stops, the problem will eased greatly. I'm not holding my breath though.

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In RL I spent a period of time living in Las Vegas. A friend I went to school with asked what it was like to live in a modern-day Sodom & Gomorrah? I told him that Vegas is a giant neon-framed mirror. It reflects what you seek out. There is another Las Vegas that has nothing to do with Gambling, sex and baccanal revelry. I have found Second Life to be the same. It would be naive (ok... scratch that... ignorant) to say that sex doesn't exist or play a major part in SL. However, there are a lot of areas (some of which are covered in other responses) that are more focused on conversation, learning, and general communal interaction. 

That being said,, I have a few communities that I am part of that are "BDSM, or fetish" sims that are quite fun, active, accepting, and open to all (you don't have to part of the lifestyle.) I got over my pose ball hoping experimentation with SLex years (more than a decade) ago. I rarely (almost never) get pixel intimate with anybody anymore. 

 I have found that a probing conversation can be exponentially more intimate and more satisfying. So with that in mind, I avoid the blatantly overt sex clubs and offerings; I am tolerant of lifestyle sims and have discovered many friends there who embrace my asexual leanings, And I have had some pretty engaging (nigh unto hot) interactions with diverse residents in G-rated sims. My experience in SL virtual geography then reflects who I am rather than the other way around. 

I'm not preaching here. Agree or disagree as you seem fit. My experience may be different than yours. Individual outcomes may vary. No guarantee is implied  or directly expressed. Offer void in Alaska and Hawaii. 

Edited by Alma Palmira
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4 minutes ago, Alma Palmira said:

In RL I spent a period of time living in Las Vegas. A friend I went to school with asked what it was like to live in a modern-day Sodom & Gomorrah? I told him that Vegas is a giant neon-framed mirror. It reflects what you seek out. There is another Las Vegas that has nothing to do with Gambling, sex and baccanal revelry. I have found Second Life to be the same. It would be naive (ok... scratch that... ignorant) to say that sex doesn't exist or play a major part in SL. However, there are a lot of areas that are more focused on conversation, learning, and general communal interaction. 

That being said,, I have a few communities that I am part of that are "BDSM, fetish" sims that are quite fun, active, accepting, and open to all (you don't have to part of the lifestyle.) I got over my pose ball hoping experimentation with SLex years (more than a decade) ago. I rarely (almost never) get pixel intimate with anybody anymore. 

 I have found that a probing conversation can be exponentially more intimate and more satisfying. So with that in mind, I avoid the blatantly overt sex clubs and offerings; I am tolerant of lifestyle sims and have discovered many friends there who embrace my asexual leanings, And I have had some pretty engaging (nigh unto hot) interactions with diverse residents in G-rated sims. My experience in SL virtual geography then reflects who I am rather than the other way around. 

I'm not preaching here. Agree or disagree as you seem fit. My experience may be different than yours. Individual outcomes may vary. No guarantee is implied  or directly expressed. Offer void in Alaska and Hawaii. 

I'm actually asexual myself, hence the reason why I'm not particularly fond of all the Adult sims that seem to revolve constantly around sex and escort clubs and fetishes. I just want a quiet place to hang out with people and talk, relax, etc. I'm also on the autism spectrum and I was hoping to create a place where those on the spectrum could feel comfortable hanging out and not feel overwhelmed as it were? So many sims seem to be full of noise, loud music, etc. And any that are quiet or the like are dead. I suppose I'm trying to make something of an in-between where people can congregate but not to the point of excess. And the reason I seek an Adult sim is because I want a place where adults can be free to talk about topics that may or may not be too sensitive for children to hear.

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2 minutes ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

I'm actually asexual myself, hence the reason why I'm not particularly fond of all the Adult sims that seem to revolve constantly around sex and escort clubs and fetishes. I just want a quiet place to hang out with people and talk, relax, etc. I'm also on the autism spectrum and I was hoping to create a place where those on the spectrum could feel comfortable hanging out and not feel overwhelmed as it were? So many sims seem to be full of noise, loud music, etc. And any that are quiet or the like are dead. I suppose I'm trying to make something of an in-between where people can congregate but not to the point of excess. And the reason I seek an Adult sim is because I want a place where adults can be free to talk about topics that may or may not be too sensitive for children to hear.

There are no children in or using Second Life. An Avatar is not the actual person and the Teenagers allowed in (provided correct information is given) are restricted to G rated regions. 

Furthermore, Child Avatars are allowed to be on Adult Rated regions with only a singular exception to this as far as the Terms of Service are concerned.

This is not all that hard to grasp and negates your stated reason for wanting an Adult rated region.

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On 1/1/2021 at 2:08 PM, animats said:

animatscafe.thumb.jpg.1deef3e5a83c13748754e1058a3379e9.jpg

Eat at Joe's. My little cafe in Zindra, at the corner of Charlesville and Kama Center. Free 20 minute parking out back. Well lit at night. I sometimes meet people here to talk business.

I have some demo NPCs moving through there. They'll say hello when you show up, to be polite, and then go on with what they're doing. So the place looks busy.

Linden Lab has a nice outdoor cafe about 100m away, in Bronlen, in a Linden park. Bronlen also has a 24-hour co-working space and cafeteria and a tiny cafe with a jukebox.

SL has no shortage of little places to hang out.

 

I find those NPCs super sad, but I guess you have to take friends where you can find them.

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25 minutes ago, Prokofy Neva said:

I find those NPCs super sad, but I guess you have to take friends where you can find them.

Reading many of Animats' posts in the past, I have the impression that his NPCs are more of a technical experiment than anything else. Maybe something was lost in translation, but  if your comment was meant in jest, fair enough. Otherwise, I found it rather uneccessary. I trust you meant the former.

Edited by Odaks
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2 hours ago, Lucia Nightfire said:

How do you know they were Linden alts?

The only time I've run into grief from "company accounts" was when a group of ProductEngine accounts a few years ago thought it was funny to raid a sandbox I adminned and shoot guests with giant physics and continued to do so from outside of banlines once they were banned.

Because one Linden who left the Lab, not sure under which circumstances, was linked to his regular avatar and that's how it was confirmed. Yet another Linden was spotted hanging with known griefers right on an infohub I run and he was there to make common cause, not police them. And still another Linden admitted it to another person who relayed it to me. In earlier days, as much as 30% of the staff were former residents. That's what they could find. Today, they have broadened their horizons. 

I think it should be mandatory for all Lindens to disclose the name of their resident accounts. If they want to form another alt after they become Lindens for privacy, understood, but we should understand whether they had large stores or businesses or other influential operations before they were hired so that any temptation for bias in helping their friends' circles is eliminated.

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3 hours ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

I'm actually asexual myself, hence the reason why I'm not particularly fond of all the Adult sims that seem to revolve constantly around sex and escort clubs and fetishes. I just want a quiet place to hang out with people and talk, relax, etc. I'm also on the autism spectrum and I was hoping to create a place where those on the spectrum could feel comfortable hanging out and not feel overwhelmed as it were? So many sims seem to be full of noise, loud music, etc. And any that are quiet or the like are dead. I suppose I'm trying to make something of an in-between where people can congregate but not to the point of excess. And the reason I seek an Adult sim is because I want a place where adults can be free to talk about topics that may or may not be too sensitive for children to hear.

 

3 hours ago, Solar Legion said:

There are no children in or using Second Life. An Avatar is not the actual person and the Teenagers allowed in (provided correct information is given) are restricted to G rated regions. 

Furthermore, Child Avatars are allowed to be on Adult Rated regions with only a singular exception to this as far as the Terms of Service are concerned.

This is not all that hard to grasp and negates your stated reason for wanting an Adult rated region.

I think ChibiDragon007 was saying that she wanted an adult sim without the blatant sexuality for adult (grown-up)) conversations that are not too sensitive for children (in the home?) to hear. (I could be wrong?)) My wife of 35 years is on the spectrum and so are two of my sons, They tend to speak very literally with verbal shortcuts.

Also the absolute statement followed by "Furthermore" and "hard to grasp" seem a bit harsh to me. Every experience on SL is subjective to the person experiencing it. Condensation and absolutes are a hard place from which to find common ground and understanding to make constructive answers that actually help a person.

Again, I may be wrong. Just throwing that out there. 

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15 hours ago, ChibiDragon007 said:

I'm actually asexual myself, hence the reason why I'm not particularly fond of all the Adult sims that seem to revolve constantly around sex and escort clubs and fetishes. I just want a quiet place to hang out with people and talk, relax, etc. I'm also on the autism spectrum and I was hoping to create a place where those on the spectrum could feel comfortable hanging out and not feel overwhelmed as it were? So many sims seem to be full of noise, loud music, etc. And any that are quiet or the like are dead. I suppose I'm trying to make something of an in-between where people can congregate but not to the point of excess. And the reason I seek an Adult sim is because I want a place where adults can be free to talk about topics that may or may not be too sensitive for children to hear.

I really don't think that the kind of place you're looking for actually exists any more. And if you tried to make one, no-one would go.

The days of non-sexual, non-music places with activity/chat going on 24/7 disappeared years ago. There are still some chatty nightclubs but they tend to be active only when events are on and very few do that all day every day. Smaller clubs tend to be chattier than the really big ones (Muddy's etc). If you don't like the music, turn it off - no-one will know.

Furry places tend to be chatty but only in voice - I've yet to find one that uses local text chat any more.

The nearest to what you're looking for is The Shelter - however in that case, child avatars visit (at least one of the volunteers is a child avatar) and they are kinda strict on bad language. It's very much a PG venue. But it is probably the last of the old-style chat hangouts left inworld.

 

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18 hours ago, Lucia Nightfire said:

How do you know they were Linden alts?

 

 

15 hours ago, Prokofy Neva said:

Because one Linden who left the Lab, not sure under which circumstances, was linked to his regular avatar and that's how it was confirmed. Yet another Linden was spotted hanging with known griefers right on an infohub I run and he was there to make common cause, not police them. And still another Linden admitted it to another person who relayed it to me. In earlier days, as much as 30% of the staff were former residents. That's what they could find. Today, they have broadened their horizons. 

I think it should be mandatory for all Lindens to disclose the name of their resident accounts. If they want to form another alt after they become Lindens for privacy, understood, but we should understand whether they had large stores or businesses or other influential operations before they were hired so that any temptation for bias in helping their friends' circles is eliminated.

1) You say someone saw a Linden talking to people you identify as griefers.  How do you know what motivated him to talk to them, if this in fact happened; perhaps it was to establish common ground, with a view to modifying their behaviour?  As for the 'admission', you're relating the word of an unknown someone who says a Linden admitted it to him.

2) It is no-one's business whose alt anyone is, no matter what you think, and no matter what the alt does.

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