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It depends on you, I suppose. If my partner and I had rented the parcel specifically so the other person could live there with me, probably. If the other person “moved into” my parcel, it would be nice if they shared. But there are also those who expect the more dominant personality in the relationship to pay the tier. My suggestion: talk it out with your person, for each relationship is different 

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   If you are in a 'new' relationship and considering moving in, perhaps rent isn't the subject that ought to be reflected upon ...

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1 hour ago, ballparkdogg said:

If you are in a new relationship in SL and you have a house, Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

that totally depends upon you and them and what was agreed/negotiated too when they moved in with you. that would have to be discussed with the person or company that you rented the land from.

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It depends. I would also hope that the person "moving in" would volunteer to help pay, rather than forcing the owner to ask.

This recently happened to me: I have a rental on a gorgeous region that I have been lusting after for years (if the homes become available they are scooped up in the blink of an eye). That expense was purely for me. Recent things brought someone back into my life. He put stuff up in my skybox area. Normally I would not ask for rent, unless his items were pushing my LI limits causing me to get more prims and increasing my cost. Why wouldn't I ask? Because I was paying rent there before he showed up, it was my place, and I'm keeping the rental because I want to. So I wouldn't ask. (I would accept if he offered.)

BUT turns out my finances took a hit and now that rental that I love and want to keep is a burden on me IRL. I swallowed my pride and asked. He's now chipping in. He likes the place too, plus he's got stuff there. 

So, it depends. And "require" is a very strong word... which makes my initial thought to answer the question simply as "No." I'd never require it.

Edited by Gatogateau
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18 hours ago, ballparkdogg said:

If you are in a new relationship in SL and you have a house, Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

I have never been in the house owning side of this situation, however no one has ever asked me for rent money.

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Unless I needed to get a larger parcel to accommodate that person moving in with me, I don't see why they would need to make a contribution. I have the land anyway, I have been paying for it quite happily. I have never asked a partner to contribute to my tier, I don't see that that would change if I was renting. Maybe people who move from some kind of 30L rental to a proper home that is going to be a big difference in cost when they get a partner may need to talk about this stuff.

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On 10/26/2020 at 7:00 AM, ballparkdogg said:

If you are in a new relationship in SL and you have a house, Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

Well i don't date in SL anymore but when i did in the past i never asked for such stuff.
Considered it funny to ask the other person to contribute 2-3 US dollars per week, especially since with most we also met in RL and that's the cost of a cup of coffee at the cafe.
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Where I am from it is a cultural expectation that the man pays for everything; we have no concept of 50/50 or splitting bills here and it is the bare minimum requirement that the man provides. The mentality here is that if you are a man and your girlfriend or wife still has to work to make ends meet, maybe you should stay single. A bit old-fashioned I admit but this is one of those RL things that bleed into my SL so if I were single and met someone I liked enough to be in a relationship with whether in SL or RL (I am already married in RL and play a grandma avatar on SL so no dating for me), it would be a dealbreaker if he asked me to “chip in” and in the first place I would not consider him to be boyfriend material if he has not secured a house even a L$50 skybox for himself. I have heard stories from women both in 1st and SecondLife where they are sharing living expenses and sometimes they end up being the one paying for everything. One girl from a discord server I am actively participating in told me that her boyfriend on SL was homeless and he moved in with her for free because he declared that he is not a sponsor or sugar daddy and hates how Girls Just Wanna Have Funds. I thought that was a big ass red flag but who am I to judge, it is their relationship and maybe in other cultures that is perfectly acceptable.


I may be biased due to my cultural upbringing, I do not mean to offend anyone. It is actually quite interesting to see contrasting views on this subject.

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On 10/26/2020 at 6:00 AM, ballparkdogg said:

Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

Mainly i only do what i can afford myself.
There are exceptions, where i accept some "help", but thats rare, as i value my own independent achievements more than money incoming.

58 minutes ago, Ajumeoni said:

I have heard stories from women both in 1st and SecondLife where they are sharing living expenses and sometimes they end up being the one paying for everything.

What you call "ending up", i would like to name as "evaluation of the disposal income" of both partners. If one has 1K USD to spare each month for things like entertainment and luxury things, while the other one barely can afford food, then its not a question about outdated gender rules anymore. 
Just my two cents ^^

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When my SL wife and I took the first step to living together because I am a traditional guy in that regards I insisted on paying my own way. I didn't ask permission either. Keep in mind I originally moved in with her. So when I did I simply asked how much do you pay for tier? She told me. I dropped that same amount on her. lol We had a big conversation about it where she told me I didn't have to do that and how she could pay her own bills. I think she was concerned about giving up to much control at the time with the relationship still being so new and I had to reassure her that is not what it is about. I said look here. Do not look at it as me saying you can't pay your bills or that I'm taking over your space. If we're gonna do this that means we're a team and teams reply on each other. I'm a dinosaur man and dinosaur men pay their bills unlike some of these younger punks on here who like to take advantage of women. So consider half the money my part of the rent payment and the other half shopping money for you and the kids to go do something nice on here. So she was good with that and life moved on. ;)

Funny story though. With 24 hours of moving in I did manage to piss off entirely every female in the family and make BIG fans out of my little girls all at the same time on here. lol Now I am not gonna say what was done due to the personal nature of it, but I will say it was bad enough to warrant the response I gave afterwards. Keep in mind I made sure I got the wife green light approval before doing this because Jaden is one of the most big hearted, loving, and forgiving people I have ever met on this planet to a fault sometimes, but I don't think even she could imagine my particular flavor for delivery at the time when she gave me the all mighty green light to go wuff, wuff, wuff. lol It was definitely a new experience for her. lol An oh crap one if that. lol:D

Now Jaden doesn't have an issue sticking up for herself, but she is one of those nice people that will give you so much rope to hang yourself with that it isn't even funny. I however am not. I got zero patience for certain things on here. So when said situation went down and I was given the opportunity to handle it I did so accordingly. lol I came threw the door and threw one of the ladies who did royally messed up thing that called themselves so called family straight out the house with the eject/ban stick and gave them boot right out of the family group. I was like do not pass go. Do not collect 200 lindens. I do not care you went away mad because you and your BS is just going to go away. :)

I then sent out a notice aka a warning to the rest of the family and let them know straight. Them days of disrespecting Jaden and getting away with the silly mess are now gone. Her kindness has been abused enough. If she drops so much as a single tear over something one of you idiots has done then I'm shutting that shirt down, no exceptions! So get it together or get out before I put you out. Needless to say her IM box exploded with who the heck does he think he is complaints. lol Those who asked me that question personally got the The Claw version of the answer. I'm big dog. Nice to meet you. Ima pee all over my territory here right now and then go back to sleep on the porch. Have a nice day. Lmao!!!! 😁

 

Edited by Velk Kerang
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On 10/26/2020 at 1:00 AM, ballparkdogg said:

If you are in a new relationship in SL and you have a house, Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

The one moving in to the other's place should offer without having to be asked.  

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3 hours ago, Resi Pfeffer said:

Mainly i only do what i can afford myself.
There are exceptions, where i accept some "help", but thats rare, as i value my own independent achievements more than money incoming.

What you call "ending up", i would like to name as "evaluation of the disposal income" of both partners. If one has 1K USD to spare each month for things like entertainment and luxury things, while the other one barely can afford food, then its not a question about outdated gender rules anymore. 
Just my two cents ^^

I can actually agree to this. I've dated women on here in the past who have owned one or more full on sims. And honestly right or wrong I never moved in with any of them because I knew I wouldn't be able to keep up with half a sim payment let alone a full sim payment. If anything they had moved in with me and I would help them with what ever on their sim, but I would never move in or use prims on their sim if for no other reason then I didn't want them to ever be able to accuse me of using them because they had money. I've seen that happen a lot on here and I just wasn't going to ever put myself in that position. That's just me though. ;)

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Plenty of RL thinking. But many have no virtual lifes but just more or less a copy of their RL here. That's fine by me btw. I don't care.

If I build and want some of my stuff rezzed permanently then of course sharing the costs of that place would be quite normal.
But if I don't care for having some boring house and stuff then it's just an additional spot to hang on. Definitely no base for sharing costs.

You would never partner with someone thinking like that so that doesn't happen to you? hahaha .. maybe 😎😁

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If it's expensive land and they are using a lot of the available land impact..but most importantly have have helped themselves to rezzing on a good chunk of the ground itself. any relationship is 50/50 so it's time to work it out like adults adding that person to the tier box for there fair share.

Be careful, one day in the future someone might claim and Win! that if you got married and lived together over a year in SL or another Virtual world then they deserve Alimony in RL!🥴

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On 10/26/2020 at 1:06 AM, Orwar said:

   If you are in a 'new' relationship and considering moving in, perhaps rent isn't the subject that ought to be reflected upon ...

Agreed.. most people in SL relationships come.. and go 😉. When you are in a new relationship, IMO, don't be rash and rent land that you cannot afford to pay by yourself (next month). Right? riiiiighttt...

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Hubby and I have never been apart from the moment we met. He moved into the rental I had at the time. I never expected him to pay rent, but made sure he was added as a tenant so he had rezzing rights. I started noticing the rent was already paid as I went to pay it though. I thanked him profusely for such a sweet gesture. So we just both would add time to our home as we saw it needed it. I appreciated the help, but never expected it because the house was something I picked out on my own for my daughter and I. So he just really adopted myself, our daughter and the house at the time quite naturally. It just happened.

When Bellisseria opened, we got a more traditional home with my premium account and houseboat with his. Both family homes are very lived in. They are ours, not his or mine. We gave up on renting because we love Belli. 

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On 10/26/2020 at 5:00 AM, ballparkdogg said:

If you are in a new relationship in SL and you have a house, Would require the person you are with to help pay the “rent”if they move in?

No, but I wouldn't ask them to move in, nor would I move into their place. It might be nice to rent an extra place that we can share, and if we did that then yes I would expect them to pay half. 

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24 minutes ago, Dafadilia Wayfarer said:

When Bellisseria opened, we got a more traditional home with my premium account and houseboat with his. Both family homes are very lived in. They are ours, not his or mine. We gave up on renting because we love Belli.

Same situation as you, and same homes too! We love Bellisseria so much that we could no longer imagine living anywhere else. 

Going back to the OP question: When I was still renting parcels on the mainland, I made sure that I could pay an entire month before moving in, and that I really wanted it all for myself so no, unless they wanted to rez their own things especially high LI objects like cars or those animesh pets then I think it is reasonable that I expect them to shoulder the cost for extra prims.

Edited by Yuumo Ichibara
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14 hours ago, Ajumeoni said:

sometimes they end up being the one paying for everything.

I once had a guy invite me to build a house on an island in his sim. He never said anything about me paying so I jumped at the chance. Put my house down and started decorating. After a few weeks he asked me for my share of the rent, which was a substantial amount. he claimed we had agreed to this, but I assured him I would never had agreed to that number as I couldn't afford it, I told him I had to leave and took my house and everything else from his sim and said goodbye. A few weeks after that I dropped by the sim to say hi, and found it abandoned and available for rent. Sure enough the price he was asking me to pay as "my share" was the total rent for the place. 

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1 hour ago, Talligurl said:

Sure enough the price he was asking me to pay as "my share" was the total rent for the place. 

That reminds me of a story a friend told me of something he did RL about 30 years ago...

A group of them were renting a house and another friend wanted to move in.  So they told him "Sure, your share of the rent is $100 a week."  He was fine with that and happily paid it.  He never found out that the total rent for the house was $100/week!  

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For me, it would depend if the person I was going to live with wanted something super expensive I couldn't afford. Presently, we don't have to pay rent for the land we live on, so it's a non issue. And it's not extravagant. My last partner didn't ask me for rent, and they were in financial control. I lived with my best friend for a bit, but I had to pay half the rent. Generally though, I would not ask for money from a partner, in a reasonable situation if I had to pay rent. And I wouldn't ask my present partner for it.

Edited by Bagnu
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I wouldn`t ask, but after a while (a couple of months top) I would expect them to offer paying half the rent or participate in some way (I know I would if situation was reversed)...I might not accept their offer, depending on their financial situation and how serious I am about the entire relationship, but I would feel better knowing they aren`t cheap and selfish (major character flaws in my book)

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