Gesture spam and why is it a thing

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

16 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

They can not wear it in public places?

Just an idea.

But see its their choice to do so and others choice to mute them if it bothers them. They dont have to not wear it in public just because a few people dont like it.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

2 minutes ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

But see its their choice to do so and others choice to mute them if it bothers them. They dont have to not wear it in public just because a few people dont like it.

Yes yes, blah blah. You can have my talking dick when you pry it from my cold, dead, whatever. It's my right to be sexually in-your-face and publicly annoying yada yada yada.

Much depends, obviously, on context. There are places where this sort of thing is appropriate. Boring and stupid, still, but appropriate.

But wearing your chatty hoo-hoo to a moderate rated club in which the majority of visitors are likely to care far more about the music than about your sexual predilections? That's just obnoxious.

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

8 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Yes yes, blah blah. You can have my talking dick when you pry it from my cold, dead, whatever. It's my right to be sexually in-your-face and publicly annoying yada yada yada.

Much depends, obviously, on context. There are places where this sort of thing is appropriate. Boring and stupid, still, but appropriate.

But wearing your chatty hoo-hoo to a moderate rated club in which the majority of visitors are likely to care far more about the music than about your sexual predilections? That's just obnoxious.

Maybe so, but they don't have care about it unless the sim/club owner or a staff member request them not too or puts it in the rules not to. What any other person there thinks or feels or likes or doesn't is irrelevant really.

No one really has to care what anyone else likes or doesn't here or in world ever. People need to stop thinking that others have to or should or need to and instead just uses the tools provided to remove that annoyance and then continue on. If they don't and then complain or get annoyed its their own fault, not the fault of the other person at all.

[Scylla Rhiadra]

15 minutes ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

Maybe so, but they don't have care about it unless the sim/club owner or a staff member request them not too or puts it in the rules not to. What any other person there thinks or feels or likes or doesn't is irrelevant really.

No one really has to care what anyone else likes or doesn't here or in world ever. People need to stop thinking that others have to or should or need to and instead just uses the tools provided to remove that annoyance and then continue on. If they don't and then complain or get annoyed its their own fault, not the fault of the other person at all.

There's this thing that we humans have developed over thousands of years called "having consideration for others."

It's gone out of fashion recently in certain parts of the world, but it's one of the reasons most of us manage to get along without banning, muting, ignoring, shooting, nuking, etc.

Edited October 14, 2020 by Scylla Rhiadra
missing word

[Mollymews]

3 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

There's this thing that we humans have developed over thousands of years called "having consideration for others."

It's gone out of fashion recently in certain parts of the world, but it's one of the reasons most of us manage to get along without banning, muting, ignoring, shooting, nuking, etc.

is circumstantial tho as you mentioned previously

with gestures in a club then the considerate thing is to take our lead from the hostee and/or DJ. If they are gesturing then is ok for us to do also. If they are not gesturing then we should not either

when not at a club then the consideration works both ways. A story

a long ago now. I was at a Linden public sandbox way over in the corner away from everyone else present.  A group of new and newish people gathered and were playing gestures at each other and giving them to each other. I was helping some of them to make gestures

a person with a Second Life Mentor tag over their head comes over by the group and starts to scold everybody about playing the gestures. That the behaviour is inconsiderate, rude and obnoxious to other people. And they are to stop gesture spamming the chat

and I say No they are not being anything of the sort. They are in a sandbox where we make things. Gestures are things to be made. And further, gesture chat has a range of 20 meters. That if the mentor observes then will see that the group is beyond chat range of the other people in the sandbox.  That the mentor moved to within chat range just to scold the people present about something they personally don't like. I tell the mentor to please move back beyond 20 meters of the group. The group was here before the mentor. The group did not invade the chat range of the other people in the sandbox, nor did they invade the chat range of the mentor. The mentor invaded the chat range of the group

the mentor person huffed and puffed with their supposed authoritah and said they will Abuse Report everybody. And I say that them doing this is an abuse in itself and if they continue with the scoldings and threats then I will be happy to raise the matter, with them present, at the next Second Life Mentor meeting so that they the mentor can know that they are wrong to be saying what they are

and I tell the group that they haven't done anything wrong and to please continue in the manner they are, which does not, and has not, disrupted anyone else in the sandbox. Any disruption caused here, is by a person choosing to disrupt themselves. A decision that they make for themselves. Like this mentor here

the mentor person stormed off and that was the end of it, and the group just carried on

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

4 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

There's this thing that we humans have developed over thousands of years called "having consideration for others."

It's gone out of fashion recently in certain parts of the world, but it's one of the reasons most of us manage to get along without banning, muting, ignoring, shooting, nuking, etc.

See, here is the issue. You think your entitled to people caring about how you feel. You are not. No one has to care how anyone else feels about anything as long as it is not breaking the rules of the sim or the tos. It doesn't matter if one person or even several get upset or annoyed, they have the choice and power to do something about it, put the person offending them on ignore. If they don't its their own fault for not using the tools that were given to them. Tough if they don't like the idea of having to do so or don't want to because they want to be lazy and just expect the other person to care about how they feel instead because they are entitlement minded children. Life doesnt work that way. Its evolved beyond that level of manipulation by others.

No one here has any special rights or entitlements or privileges as to how anyone else has to act around them ever. Yet a lot of people in world and on the forums want to think they do.

[Sassy Kenin]

Gesturebating is an Art Form

[Da5id Weatherwax]

Apart from reasonable use of "applause", audible gesture spam in the Boiling Point when there's a DJ or other performer on the stream - and "audible gestures" includes "intimate sound effects" from body parts even though its an adult club - will result in I or one of my minions on the security team politely asking you to mute them. Same applies to overuse of text gestures disrupting chat in the club.

If the polite request has no effect we ask impolitely. After that, regardo boot.

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

2 minutes ago, Da5id Weatherwax said:

Apart from reasonable use of "applause", audible gesture spam in the Boiling Point when there's a DJ or other performer on the stream - and "audible gestures" includes "intimate sound effects" from body parts even though its an adult club - will result in I or one of my minions on the security team politely asking you to mute them. Same applies to overuse of text gestures disrupting chat in the club.

If the polite request has no effect we ask impolitely. After that, regardo boot.

But you see not every staff member in every club of venue does the same thing. So this is the you and your place rule thing. Which is completely fine and within your rights to do.

The problem is not a lot of clubs have staff members or owners that think or feel the same way about gestures.

What this topic really is about secretly is one persons dislike of gestures and wanting everything to be dull and boring because they don't like any distractions in what they are doing. They want to be at a club and think its has to be quiet except for the music or the dj. That is not how a club works..

[Da5id Weatherwax]

1 minute ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

But you see not every staff member in every club of venue does the same thing. So this is the you and your place rule thing. Which is completely fine and within your rights to do.

The problem is not a lot of clubs have staff members or owners that think or feel the same way about gestures.

What this topic really is about secretly is one persons dislike of gestures and wanting everything to be dull and boring because they don't like any distractions in what they are doing. They want to be at a club and think its has to be quiet except for the music or the dj. That is not how a club works..

True, but  - possibly because the club owner is herself a DJ - it's in *that* clubs rules that you don't disrupt the performance. That doesn't mean folks have to be quiet, they don't. Only a fool would expect that. Just keep it within reasonable bounds to let other folks enjoy the performance. Gestures aint banned, gesture spam during a performance is.

[Rat Luv]

Not gesture spam but I always felt bad for DJs when people mass posted Youtube links in local chat during sets. Very rude IMO.

Edited October 14, 2020 by Rat Luv

[Sassy Kenin]

55 minutes ago, Da5id Weatherwax said:

Apart from reasonable use of "applause", audible gesture spam in the Boiling Point when there's a DJ or other performer on the stream - and "audible gestures" includes "intimate sound effects" from body parts even though its an adult club - will result in I or one of my minions on the security team politely asking you to mute them. Same applies to overuse of text gestures disrupting chat in the club.

If the polite request has no effect we ask impolitely. After that, regardo boot.

Place sounds kinda stuffy, do you offer an early bird special on Tuesday?

[Scylla Rhiadra]

5 hours ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

See, here is the issue. You think your entitled to people caring about how you feel.

Well, no, actually. This is not "the issue."

I have nowhere suggested that jerks shouldn't have the right to be jerks. They do. Nor have I at any point suggested that I have the right -- the "entitlement" -- to stop them from being jerks. It is you who insist that this is about rights and entitlements, not me.

What I am suggesting is that people who are jerks don't need to choose to exercise their rights to be jerkish.

A civilized, well-functioning society is not made up of individuals continually battling to assert their "right" to be this or that -- although rights are, of course, important. A really civil society, one that works well and that therefore is most conducive to people being happy together in a community, is one in which there is a fine and dynamic balance between individual rights and the good of others, and of the community -- between our own rights, and our responsibility to others. It is one in which choosing not to do something that is my "right," but that will be disruptive, uncomfortable, or obnoxious to someone else is an expression of my understanding that my happiness is inextricably connected to that of other people around me. And it is, of course, also an expression of my respect for other human beings.

Here's the thing. This vision you evoke so frequently of a world where everyone is in conflict, and obnoxiously asserting their rights in defiance of everyone else, is totally, completely, and utterly alien to me. I don't live in a world like that, in RL, or in SL. Because, you see, I choose to hang out with people who are caring, and supportive, and generous, kind, and considerate of others. My friends, without exception, and beginning with Maddy and the three lovely women I live with here, all care about me, and other people. That's actually a basic qualification of being my friend in the first place. 

I'm not interested in socializing or associating with jerks, so . . . I don't.

Why do you?

Edited October 15, 2020 by Scylla Rhiadra

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

6 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Well, no, actually. This is not "the issue."

I have nowhere suggested that jerks shouldn't have the right to be jerks. They do. Nor have I at any point suggested that I have the right -- the "entitlement" -- to stop them from being jerks. It is you who insist that this is about rights and entitlements, not me.

What I am suggesting is that people who are jerks don't need to choose to exercise their rights to be jerkish.

A civilized, well-functioning society is not made up of individuals continually battling to assert their "right" to be this or that -- although rights are, of course, important. A really civil society, one that works well and that therefore is most conducive to people being happy together in a community, is one in which there is a fine and dynamic balance between individual rights and the good of others, and of the community -- between our own rights, and our responsibility to others. It is one in which choosing not to do something that is my "right," but that will be disruptive, uncomfortable, or obnoxious to someone else is an expression of my understanding that my happiness is inextricably connected to that of other people around me. And it is, of course, also an expression of my respect for other human beings.

Here's the thing. This vision you evoke so frequently of a world where everyone is in conflict, and obnoxiously asserting their rights in defiance of everyone else, is totally, completely, and utterly alien to me. I don't live in a world like that, in RL, or in SL. Because, you see, I choose to hang out with people who are caring, and supportive, and generous, kind, and considerate of others. My friends, without exception, and beginning with Maddy and the three lovely women I live with here, all care about me, and other people. That's actually a basic qualification of being my friend in the first place. 

I'm not interested in socializing or associating with jerks, so . . . I don't.

Why do you?

Even so called friends can be jerks at time and you shouldn't trust them so much that they wont be when the time is right for them to do so.

Even your best friends can and will betray you at some point when you least expect it and it suits them. But of course you will probably be one that just takes it on the chin and forgives them for it and makes nothing about it. Or you will oblivious too it until someone ever points it out and even then you still probably will discount what ever is said.

I don't choose to be around jerks, it just happens. When I can I keep away from them, but it doesn't stop me from realizing they are there and how they will act when they want.

My views may be alien to you, but they are none the less real and do happen more often then you realize or wish to think or believe. Most people are not nearly as considerate as you wish to think all the time. Just because you have a few around you that currently act or play as if they are, doesn't mean they are all the time.

people wear masks even friends, they will act one way around you and another to strangers. so even the most well behaved friend may be a total jerk to other people.

 

[Sukubia Scarmon]

2 hours ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

Even your best friends can and will betray you at some point when you least expect it and it suits them.

PoV question: Will YOU betray your friends if they least expect it and it suits you?

[Sassy Kenin]

2 hours ago, Sukubia Scarmon said:

PoV question: Will YOU betray your friends if they least expect it and it suits you?

Maybe speaking in honesty is just telling the truth instead of being a hypocrite? don't quite me on that it's just a hunch😀

[Sassy Kenin]

4 hours ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

people wear masks even friends,

 

Edited October 15, 2020 by Sassy Kenin
Added Thingy

[Sukubia Scarmon]

6 minutes ago, Sassy Kenin said:

Maybe speaking in honesty is just telling the truth instead of being a hypocrite? don't quite me on that it's just a hunch😀

I'm not saying she's dishonest. I just wonder where she sees herself - the way I understood it, she believes everyone to be selfish by nature.
Personally, I think many people are selfish, and yes, if given the chance, or a good enough reason, they will absolutely betray their friends. Holy crap, I know parents who threw their own children under the bus for minor things and vice versa.
But I think there are many exceptions. 
I've been betrayed by family and friends in the past as well, so I know how *****ty that feels like. I'd not want my friends to feel the same way, so I don't. But maybe I haven't had the right reason yet, and would do so if I had enough to gain for it, who knows. I'd like to think myself better than that, tho.

[Sassy Kenin]

17 minutes ago, Sukubia Scarmon said:

Personally, I think many people are selfish, and yes, if given the chance, or a good enough reason, they will absolutely betray their friends.

 

Edited October 15, 2020 by Sassy Kenin

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

14 minutes ago, Sukubia Scarmon said:

I'm not saying she's dishonest. I just wonder where she sees herself - the way I understood it, she believes everyone to be selfish by nature.
Personally, I think many people are selfish, and yes, if given the chance, or a good enough reason, they will absolutely betray their friends. Holy crap, I know parents who threw their own children under the bus for minor things and vice versa.
But I think there are many exceptions. 
I've been betrayed by family and friends in the past as well, so I know how *****ty that feels like. I'd not want my friends to feel the same way, so I don't. But maybe I haven't had the right reason yet, and would do so if I had enough to gain for it, who knows. I'd like to think myself better than that, tho.

Not everyone, I did not say that, I said most people. There is a subtle difference between the two.

As toward myself; No, I dont intend to ever betray or hurt my friends. I find that deplorable and those that do and then try and excuse it away or make the other person think it was their fault for doing it.

[Rowan Amore]

5 hours ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

 

Even your best friends can and will betray you at some point when you least expect it and it suits them.

 

But you did say can and will with this.  Of all people, you'd expect it least from your best friend. 

Yes, people can be jerks.  Lots of people.  Most people?  I'd rather believe most people try not to be.  Of course, that's the world I live in so if yours isn't like that, *shrugs*.

[Drakonadrgora Darkfold]

1 minute ago, RowanMinx said:

But you did say can and will with this.  Of all people, you'd expect it least from your best friend. 

Yes, people can be jerks.  Lots of people.  Most people?  I'd rather believe most people try not to be.  Of course, that's the world I live in so if yours isn't like that, *shrugs*.

I dont expect anything from anyone not even best friends I have learned not too. For yes I have had a few so called best friends in my past betray and hurt me because it suited them to do so. Be glad you dont live in my world...

[Rowan Amore]

1 minute ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

I dont expect anything from anyone not even best friends I have learned not too. For yes I have had a few so called best friends in my past betray and hurt me because it suited them to do so. Be glad you dont live in my world...

Me too.

[Sassy Kenin]

4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

Of course, that's the world I live in so if yours isn't like that, *shrugs*.

There is no spoon!

 

[Rowan Amore]

1 minute ago, Sassy Kenin said:

There is no spoon!

 

Nor do I live in the Matrix. 😆