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Sexual Orientation in SL and RL


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I have found that, now that I find myself a little more open to a relationship on SL, I am more fluid in my orientation. Genders and genitalia which I had never before imagined playing with or falling in love with are slowly becoming more appealing to me.

I wonder if this had happened sooner if I would have allowed myself to have relationships in SL sooner too.
I have never been sexually or romantically active in SL and although I am nowadays at liberty to play and fall in love to my heart's content, I find that nowadays I want an emotional bond with someone before I share my pixels with them in SL. But had I felt this freedom in my earlier days, I would have experimented more, played more, fallen in love more (and prolly get hurt more, but also learned more).

But could I call myself bi? No. If I am bi-anything, it would be bi-open, as in open to the possibility.


 

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Not possible for me, my sexual preference is clearly towards specific RL female looks (plus voices and characteristics) so any alternatives or avatar looks won't work.

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I'm curious about this too. My sexual orientation doesn't change rl vs. sl, but I have read in some people's profiles where their orientation is different in sl. I've wondered if they mean that they're interested in rp'ing another sexual orientation or if sl is an opportunity for them to experiment or something else.

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I'm in two minds about this. 

The first mind is open and says that it is a safe place to experiment and maybe let RL urges and curiosities out to play.  The other mind is more jaded and has been around too long and says it's mostly an attention seeking thing - especially with females who play at being all sexually flirty with their female friends to get the attention of men.

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12 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said:

The other mind is more jaded and has been around too long and says it's mostly an attention seeking thing - especially with females who play at being all sexually flirty with their female friends to get the attention of men.

OMG, That totally reminded me of this skit by Karen Taylor.

 

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1 hour ago, Jordan Whitt said:

I'm in two minds about this. 

The first mind is open and says that it is a safe place to experiment and maybe let RL urges and curiosities out to play.  The other mind is more jaded and has been around too long and says it's mostly an attention seeking thing - especially with females who play at being all sexually flirty with their female friends to get the attention of men.

From my end it's not that. I've been owned by both men and women. But RL I couldn't be with another woman. Maybe it's because it's the personality that attracts me in SL more than the gender. I don't know. 

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2 hours ago, Jordan Whitt said:

I'm in two minds about this. 

The first mind is open and says that it is a safe place to experiment and maybe let RL urges and curiosities out to play.  The other mind is more jaded and has been around too long and says it's mostly an attention seeking thing - especially with females who play at being all sexually flirty with their female friends to get the attention of men.

I've always thought this, too.  It would explain the huge amount of submissive/bisexual women in SL.  Its what a lot of men are looking for in a woman.  It would also explain the deluge of those same women who are now babygirl/brats.  Most women know men love that girl on girl porn.  Not saying that's what it's all about.  SL would be a safe place to experiment but I've always wondered too if those women very much into the bisexuality are really men in rl.

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4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

I've always thought this, too.  It would explain the huge amount of submissive/bisexual women in SL.  Its what a lot of men are looking for in a woman.  It would also explain the deluge of those same women who are now babygirl/brats.  Most women know men love that girl on girl porn.  Not saying that's what it's all about.  SL would be a safe place to experiment but I've always wondered too if those women very much into the bisexuality are really men in rl.

It's possible I guess, but I don't know if it would be in an actual SL relationship.

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I’m bisexual in RL but identify as homosexual (with exceptions) in SL.

I’m in a LONG-term committed relationship in SL, but if my Partner suddenly wanted to Swing, take on a Poly partner or kicks me to the curb - these would be the exceptions;

-Male avatar with female typist  would be fine so long as she was not out to role-play the “darker side” of masculinity. Believe me; in 15 years I’ve seen that happen.

-Female avatar with any-gender typist. If a male on a female avatar carried Herself well, makes me laugh, can be loyal and our kinks match, that could work.

I’m not in Sl to live by my RL limitations (I have a small disability) and I prefer to be involved with people who are emotionally accessible and are (a) fun, (b) emotionally stable and (c) have a high level of empathy.

I’m a Hugger and a Cuddler and I rescue stray animals. That should tell you what you need to know about me 🙂

I don’t *avoid* the segment of the population Limits themselves to their RL demographics By Choice, unless they become disparaging of the segment that took the mantra “Your World/Your Imagination” to heart.

giphy.gif?cid=4d1e4f296f6fea316c23bf7127

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Ridiculously straight in RL and SL.

I suspect most people will be the same in SL as RL. Preference is preference. You might expand in SL a little, but you'd have to be at least a little into it in RL to get any enjoyment out of it, I think.

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1 hour ago, Paul Hexem said:

I suspect most people will be the same in SL as RL. Preference is preference. You might expand in SL a little, but you'd have to be at least a little into it in RL to get any enjoyment out of it, I think.

Paul, I agree with that statement.

That would also cover the ones who are secretive in RL about their sexuality, but can live it openly in SL.

They are consistent between RL and SL, just more open in SL.

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Edited by Amanda Crisp
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1 hour ago, Paul Hexem said:

I suspect most people will be the same in SL as RL. Preference is preference. You might expand in SL a little, but you'd have to be at least a little into it in RL to get any enjoyment out of it, I think.

I agree, and speaking for myself and myself alone, my (perceived?) shift in orientation would definitely not be an SL-only thing.

I am actually quite fascinated by this, how far will my tastes shift? Is this as far as it will go? Or will I one day actually fantasize about the body parts which once held no attraction for me?
I know one thing; I may try to resist this change, but mostly out of habit rather than actual repulsion, and for that I must watch myself.

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2 hours ago, Paul Hexem said:

Ridiculously straight in RL and SL.

I suspect most people will be the same in SL as RL. Preference is preference. You might expand in SL a little, but you'd have to be at least a little into it in RL to get any enjoyment out of it, I think.

 
Exactly, i had a similar talk 2 days ago with one of my ex's. She is actually bisexual and although had sex with one of her friends in RL she considered herself straight.
But fact is it doesn't work that way.
We had a nice cozy chat and listened to her views that actually were the usual stuff you hear that the female body is different and very attractive.
(Well if you ask a homosexual man he will tell you that he finds the male body very attractive, that is why his sexual orientation is towards men.)
And of course she used the usual cliche that every man wants 2 women in his bed.. 
(That is actually nonsense, doesn't apply for everyone and of course has nothing to do with why a woman is sexually attracted to another woman.)
 
When someone is sexually attracted to both genders that means they are bisexual. It really is that simple, no need to make it complicated.
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7 hours ago, Nick0678 said:
 
 
And of course she used the usual cliche that every man wants 2 women in his bed.. 
(That is actually nonsense, doesn't apply for everyone and of course has nothing to do with why a woman is sexually attracted to another woman.)
 
When someone is sexually attracted to both genders that means they are bisexual. It really is that simple, no need to make it complicated.

This may be true in RL but I know for a fact a lot of women in SL use bisexuality to attract men.  As far as men wanting 2 women in bed, again this may not apply in RL but it dang sure does in SL.  

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18 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

This may be true in RL but I know for a fact a lot of women in SL use bisexuality to attract men.  As far as men wanting 2 women in bed, again this may not apply in RL but it dang sure does in SL.  

IMHO 3+ in a sexual liaison is more of a geometry problem  🙂

Sometimes its nice to get lost in the crowd; unless its in the bedroom ........

giphy.gif?cid=4d1e4f29a592198269c39f629a

 

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11 minutes ago, Amanda Crisp said:

IMHO 3+ in a sexual liaison is more of a geometry problem  🙂

Sometimes its nice to get lost in the crowd; unless its in the bedroom ........

giphy.gif?cid=4d1e4f29a592198269c39f629a

 

I agree and prefer one on one encounters.  I was speaking to the overabundance of bisexual women in SL and the possible reason behind it.  The fact is the geometry works better with 2 men and one woman. 

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4 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

I agree and prefer one on one encounters.  I was speaking to the overabundance of bisexual women in SL and the possible reason behind it.  The fact is the geometry works better with 2 men and one woman. 

The great heartache of kissing girls in the club; when only one is pretending 😞

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1 hour ago, RowanMinx said:

This may be true in RL but I know for a fact a lot of women in SL use bisexuality to attract men.  As far as men wanting 2 women in bed, again this may not apply in RL but it dang sure does in SL.  

Oh i bet many will do, people try all kind of stuff in SL.

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My GF's and I have great fun with two of us with 1 man. We take turns a lot of times though. , Or the man want's to watch  the two of us. Then of there is the standard 3 way with alternations. But we are very kinky, so RP is a big part of it. But there are lot's of variations. I haven't been asked for MMF yet, but I would be right into it!!!

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There aren't all that many differences between my SL and RL sexuality and experiences but to give a non-ordered list of those differences:

  • I have had a fair few male on male encounters in Second Life, some involving more than one male even
    • Whereas in RL I can count the number of male partners I have had on one hand
  • I have had a couple of three-ways in Second Life (see above) yet of those, none have involved a second woman
    • In RL I have only ever had one three-way that involved a woman and as noted above, involved a second male
  • In both Second Life and RL I have had (and do presently have) "Pets" (not quite Submissives as most would see them)
    • However in neither am I the "Pet" (despite wanting to be such from time to time, my current SO in RL is still getting used to her more dominating side as well)
  • In Second Life it is far easier for me to open up and i am a lot more relaxed in my attempts to have a bit of fun - be it one time or more often

And yes I realize this is a bit more information than originally asked for but I did notice the thread had evolved into differences in experiences on top of sexuality.

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