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11 hours ago, Seicher Rae said:

Funny/awful how body issues can morph from RL to SL.

I find this a fascinating subject, actually.

I look at my old, pre-mesh shape now with dismay: waif like proportions, except for the D cups. My back aches just seeing the old pics. I tend, nowadays, to prefer my body proportional and "realistic" -- which is one of the reasons I like your #3; it's pretty similar to my own default shape. I think Nalates put it rather well: I don't want to look like a "girl"; I want to look like a woman. I have no desire to revisit my teens or early 20s, even virtually. So, a slightly more thickish body is my preference.

But there are, of course, a lot of people here whose aesthetic and understanding of their avatar is very different. I'd call it "cartoonish." I don't mean that as an insult: our avatars are cartoons! I mean that their avatar appearance represents a deliberately exaggerated version of RL beauty ideals, in the same way that Mannerist art elongated limbs to unrealistic proportions, and that Betty Boop represents a cartoonish "idea" of the woman's body of her time. So, women with HUGE hips and breasts, but wasp waists, and men with torsos that are like equilateral triangles.

Not at all my thing, but that's fine: I can still understand it. In some ways, it's at least potentially a more sophisticated understanding of the relationship between the real and the virtual than my own "realistic" approach embodies (so to speak).

(What I don't like -- and yes, this is again personal preference -- is the default look of so many faces of both genders. The men tend to look brutish and violent, and the women often judgy, unpleasant, and mean. I worked hard to avoid the latter look in my own avatar.)

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Why does that matter? You're supposed to be commenting on the pictures, not on the people behind the avatars. And for those guys who won't post here for fear of being accused of objectifying wome

OK, since I jokingly went all Queer Eye from the Pixel Guy (which, incidentally, is my blog's byline) on Amanda's couch-n-candles pic, I guess I may as well be gentleman enough to offer some comments

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17 hours ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

I find this a fascinating subject, actually.

I look at my old, pre-mesh shape now with dismay: waif like proportions, except for the D cups. My back aches just seeing the old pics. I tend, nowadays, to prefer my body proportional and "realistic" -- which is one of the reasons I like your #3; it's pretty similar to my own default shape. I think Nalates put it rather well: I don't want to look like a "girl"; I want to look like a woman. I have no desire to revisit my teens or early 20s, even virtually. So, a slightly more thickish body is my preference.

But there are, of course, a lot of people here whose aesthetic and understanding of their avatar is very different. I'd call it "cartoonish." I don't mean that as an insult: our avatars are cartoons! I mean that their avatar appearance represents a deliberately exaggerated version of RL beauty ideals, in the same way that Mannerist art elongated limbs to unrealistic proportions, and that Betty Boop represents a cartoonish "idea" of the woman's body of her time. So, women with HUGE hips and breasts, but wasp waists, and men with torsos that are like equilateral triangles.

Not at all my thing, but that's fine: I can still understand it. In some ways, it's at least potentially a more sophisticated understanding of the relationship between the real and the virtual than my own "realistic" approach embodies (so to speak).

(What I don't like -- and yes, this is again personal preference -- is the default look of so many faces of both genders. The men tend to look brutish and violent, and the women often judgy, unpleasant, and mean. I worked hard to avoid the latter look in my own avatar.)

On something this subjective, it is hard not to be a bit judgey.  I truly don't care how others choose to represent themselves inworld, but I still roll my eyes at times. :) I had been having some wonderful chats with an oldbie avatar, and a system look mattered not one iota in the conversation. 

I want to believe that the people who are walking around with the highly exaggerated bodies are doing so ironically, or as social commentary, but I'm too much of a misanthrope to believe that to be true except for maybe one or two folks on the grid. 

Seicher has been the "boyish" (grrrrrrr) shape since ever, with reason. While not exactly my body type, she is similar (just like her face has many of "my" features... just slung together better!). That body type is my ideal "me" in real life, but it based on "real" me when I was younger...a girl in my early 20s. Like you I don't want to revisit those years per se but good jeebus yes, give me that body back! :) But Seicher IS a cartoon, and yet, when "shamed" by another cartoon (who happens to be a giant avatar, like 9 ft tall) the negative comments bothered me in real life. Oh I have had trolls tell me "ugly avatar" and I laugh it off, but this one...?

The whole incident has made me think about how screwed up our society is in terms of body acceptance, its shape, age, and yes color. I'm insecure about a LOT of things, and it wouldn't surprise me in real life to be made to feel "less than" by careless remarks made by an asshat. It *was* surprising how real it felt in SL. We are programmed deep.

Edited by Seicher Rae
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3 hours ago, Seicher Rae said:

But Seicher IS a cartoon, and yet, when "shamed" by another cartoon (who happens to be a giant avatar, like 9 ft tall) the negative comments bothered me in real life. Oh I have had trolls tell me "ugly avatar" and I laugh it off, but this one...?

Only had this happen to me once, that I can recall -- and it was from a mutual *coughs* friend we both know well, who suggested, early on in my experiments with mesh heads, that I looked "barely human." He was right, insofar as I hadn't yet got the look "right," but I'm still trying to work out why it peeved me. Was it because it was insulting my appearance -- or my ability to tweak sliders? I'm not sure.

3 hours ago, Seicher Rae said:

The whole incident has made me think about how screwed up our society is in terms of body acceptance, its shape, age, and yes color. I'm insecure about a LOT of things, and it wouldn't surprise me in real life to be made to feel "less than" by careless remarks made by an asshat. It *was* surprising how real it felt in SL. We are programmed deep.

For sure. All you need to do to see that is see how cookie-cutter most of us are, in terms of body type and shape. Even those of us who take pains to use "realistic" proportions, and add a pinch or so of fat around the waist. It is literally impossible to achieve some very common RL body types in SL using mainstream mesh bodies. Until very recently, it was difficult even to have smaller (i.e., less than a C cup) boobs without distorting the mesh.

Yep, the programming goes very deep indeed.

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I tend to reserve airing any judgments about other peoples avatars unless I am explicitly asked to give opinions on improvements. It can be such a sensitive topic, and sometimes people don't really want you to be critical, but just want some reassurance from a friend that they are indeed awesome.  I am usually happy to help either way. I love seeing the range of avatars on the grid though, it would make people watching in public and fashion events so boring if we all had the same sensibilities about how to shape avatars.

For whats it's worth I am definitely on #1 Seicher bandwagon.

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On 8/23/2020 at 7:46 AM, Seicher Rae said:

So I'm still fussing over the comment that my avatar needed to be curvier, that it was "boyish"!!!, and unsexy. I shouldn't. The person is an asshat. But still, you can get 10,000 compliments and 1 bad remark and the brain tends to focus on the one bad remark, or mine does. So here are three pictures. Let's see if I can get them in the order I want. Top is original Seeker, basically how I've been for 11 years. Second one is a purchased shape (same head) that was very curvy (bust at 75 for starters). Third one is an in-between the two (bust at 47). Comments? Besides "quit paying attention to asshats"? (These are very quick snapshots, not taken for any artistic anything. )

Boyish???? :o

New shape original 82220_001.jpg

New shape paid 82220_001.jpg

 

New shape curvy 82220_002.jpg

i like nu,mbers 1 and 3. Before you i saw the word boyish i don t even thought about it, i see here sporty shaped girl.🥰

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this are 2 of my looks. while wearing 1 st one i got    A LOT of compliments about how sexy,curvy,etc. The second one is with what i started my new era with new head,got less "hits" by guys, but more complains about that my shape looks like a kid and also not curvy,lol. 

imgonline-com-ua-Compressed-kvZjeB595RYVbDr.jpg

Snapshot_009.png

Edited by Panteleeva
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41 minutes ago, Panteleeva said:

The second one is with what i started my new era with new head,got less "hits" by guys, but more complains about that my shape looks like a kid and also not curvy,lol. 

Those folks must have met pretty mature kids... but if you'd like a mix of, well, "best of both worlds" aka your new head and the former body, that shouldn't be too hard to mix. Take not of the numbers of the body sliders and put them on a fresh copy of your head shape.

The head would look lovely on either body, me thinks.

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The first one is how I used to look earlier. But I changed to the #2 because many people started saying that I look like a kid, and also I was removed from a lot of adult regions. 

:3

bliss

 

Edited by shiviex
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2 minutes ago, Lillith Hapmouche said:

Regarding the title of the FlickR post: with fries?

   Nah, trying to take it easy with the carbs. ^_^

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4 hours ago, shiviex said:

The first one is how I used to look earlier. But I changed to the #2 because many people started saying that I look like a kid, and also I was removed from a lot of adult regions. 

:3

bliss

 

I think you look pretty child like in the top one. More like a teenager in the bottom one.

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19 hours ago, Elora Lunasea said:

stud.jpg

   About the image's title on Flickr? Not on the forums! :P

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