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Women post, show off them pictures and let the boys comment on them!


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Why does that matter? You're supposed to be commenting on the pictures, not on the people behind the avatars. And for those guys who won't post here for fear of being accused of objectifying wome

OK, since I jokingly went all Queer Eye from the Pixel Guy (which, incidentally, is my blog's byline) on Amanda's couch-n-candles pic, I guess I may as well be gentleman enough to offer some comments

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13 hours ago, Zeta Vandyke said:

Now that's nice and all, but where are all the men that should be commenting on our pics?!

   I don't know if I dare comment on your pics .. :P

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@Orwar

Personally and lol lets face it I have been out tonight too much wine , I regret that the guys who used to post on the 'how does your avi look today' stopped doing it because of the negative comments, i loved seeing them but hey who am I to say I'm not a forums favourite as my mouth runs away too much but come on guys keep posting I for one love seeing you. Just dont stop. 

 

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On 8/20/2020 at 9:11 AM, Zeta Vandyke said:

Now that's nice and all, but where are all the men that should be commenting on our pics?!

Quietly enjoying the pics and not saying a word so as to not get blasted for objectifying women.  We are not allowed to openly enjoy the beauty of women.  At least not in the US where I'm from. 

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46 minutes ago, Nando Yip said:

pointed ears, colored hair, hairy tails, perfect proportions ... I wonder what really exists behind all these pixels ...?

Why does that matter? You're supposed to be commenting on the pictures, not on the people behind the avatars.

And for those guys who won't post here for fear of being accused of objectifying women - how about... not objectifying women? How about finding something in the image to comment about that is not even remotely sexual?

  • Comment on her outfit. Look beyond anything sexual in it. What else is in the image, besides the bikini/lingerie/boobs/butt?
  • Comment about the image composition
  • Comment about the atmosphere or mood that the image evokes. Ignore any moods that begin at your crotch ;)
  • Comment about her avatar's eyes, hair, elegant hands, pose, accessories, makeup, etc

Just find something nice/interesting/striking/atmospheric in the image and comment on that. It could be the bright colour of a hat that really stands out against a grey background (even if her bikini top is actually two postage stamps and a bit of string and all you can really see is her boobs) or it could be that she's clearly taken the time to frame the composition perfectly and is using a fantastic deeply-shadowed Windlight setting (even if she could possibly be naked and you're trying to squint at the deep shadows at her crotch to find out if she's got panties on or not).

Crucially: the thing that you comment on should be something that she has had agency in. She put together that outfit. She matched that nail polish colour to the exact tone of her eyeshadow. She framed the image perfectly. She chose the Windlight setting and fiddled with the environment sliders to get those shadows just right. You're commenting on what she has done with that image, so don't say "Oh, you took that at XYZ place. It's great for exploring."

If you can do that, you won't "get blasted for objectifying women". I commented on ten images (one of them was a female poster's male alt; which for me might evoke the same feelings that looking at female avatars would for a straight dude) at the top of page 2 of this thread. I didn't get blasted once. In fact - reading the responses by women to my remarks - I saw varying degrees of delight, which in turn made it pretty clear that non-sexual compliments such as mine are probably a rarity for them in SL (and most likely IRL too).

Women deserve more compliments that make them delighted like that.

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Normally I would stay out of the whole potential bombs of threads with the male vs female potential, but I will wade in here (and at pg 5 I don't see any flame wars, were they on 3-4?).

I'd love comments. I just recently got out of a relationship that has me playing songs like "Mad woman" by Taylor Swift "No one likes a mad woman, You made her like that, And you'll poke that bear 'til her claws come out, And you find something to wrap your noose around, And there's nothing like a mad woman" and "Rolling in the Deep" (Adele) "you could have had it allllllllllllllll...."  So, yeah, feeling all warm and fuzzy :p  :) 

Part of that is the dude was insisting I make major changes to my avi. First, I was to be a giant, 100% height. Also I needed to be more curvy, more sexy. I bumped up the curve and it wasn't enough. He swore he didn't want the hyper shape of the huuuuuuuuge ***** and butt. But. So, this is SR at original non-bumped up shape and height (6'2" or so)

Comments, dudes? Not curvy enough? Ummmm.... objectify away, folks! :)

NSFW: https://www.flickr.com/photos/157137235@N03/50077254526/in/dateposted/

(fwiw: the orange dress one is raw screenshot, the strawberry one is a little PShop)

 

 

 

Everwinter 070820_002 copy.jpg

The Finder 070620 signed no nip.jpg

Edited by Seicher Rae
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On 8/20/2020 at 9:15 AM, Cinnamon Mistwood said:

I didn't realize you were no longer posting in the threads due to drama.  I loved your intense look and photo style.  Yup, hot stuff.  Maybe you will choose to post again so I can quietly objectify you from corner I lurk in.

 

There are quite a few of us no longer posting in photo threads due to drama and ... pedantic "one true way" to participate folks.

There are a few of us no longer posting at all, or much, in any thread because of the same. This coming from one, as you know, from the old flame-away old forums. :/

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25 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

Part of that is the dude was insisting I make major changes to my avi. First, I was to be a giant, 100% height. Also I needed to be more curvy, more sexy. I bumped up the curve and it wasn't enough. He swore he didn't want the hyper shape of the huuuuuuuuge ***** and butt. But. So, this is SR at original non-bumped up shape and height (6'2" or so)

Comments, dudes? Not curvy enough? Ummmm.... objectify away, folks! :)

   A clown in the backdrop .. You miss me, don't you?!

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@Seicher RaeMay have had our disagreements in the past but couldn’t agree with you more. Btw your pics are great so his loss if he wanted you to change. I’m just popping down to my local plastic surgeon who has a one day offer to drastically change mr RL body. Go me !! nope second thoughts can’t afford it. Story of my life . 

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17 hours ago, TT120 said:

We are not allowed to openly enjoy the beauty of women.

Yes. Yes, you are.

We even like compliments (please note, compliments, not wolf whistles) on how we look! I actually work very hard to look good -- and when a man notices, and compliments me on it in an appropriate and intelligent way that does not reduce me to my jiggly bits (which is what "objectifying" literally means: turning women into objects), I respond very well. What will annoy a great many of us is if that is all you find valuable or worthwhile to say about us.

To add to Skell's absolutely superb rundown . . . a couple of additional points.

1) There certainly are women who enjoy being "objectified." Sometimes, that's their particular kink. And that's absolutely fine: feel free to do that in a more intimate setting, which is a more appropriate context than a very public forum. (You wouldn't start pawing someone in public, would you? Same principle.) Assuming, or posting as though all women want to be admired solely on the basis of what you consider to be their "do-ability" is insulting to everyone else. Their kink isn't necessarily ours; keep it to your communications with them.

2) Talking about me or anyone as a purely aesthetic or sexually desirable being introduces a degree of intimacy that, for most of us, you must earn. There are men, in both RL and SL, with whom I am close enough that the occasional non-crude sexual comment is permitted, because they have earned that right -- by being good friends, by demonstrating that they don't think of me merely as a sexual partner. Some random guy on a forum, though? No, you don't get to talk about my ass. Earn that intimacy first. Do the work, and demonstrate to me that you see me as more than a bumpable collection of shapely pixels. Then, maybe, our conversation will rise to that level of intimacy.

This really isn't so hard, is it? Treat people -- women or men -- like they are people deserving of consideration and respect. Why is that basic golden rule even controversial?

Edited by Scylla Rhiadra
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1 hour ago, Seicher Rae said:

Normally I would stay out of the whole potential bombs of threads with the male vs female potential, but I will wade in here (and at pg 5 I don't see any flame wars, were they on 3-4?).

I'd love comments. I just recently got out of a relationship that has me playing songs like "Mad woman" by Taylor Swift "No one likes a mad woman, You made her like that, And you'll poke that bear 'til her claws come out, And you find something to wrap your noose around, And there's nothing like a mad woman" and "Rolling in the Deep" (Adele) "you could have had it allllllllllllllll...."  So, yeah, feeling all warm and fuzzy :p  :) 

Part of that is the dude was insisting I make major changes to my avi. First, I was to be a giant, 100% height. Also I needed to be more curvy, more sexy. I bumped up the curve and it wasn't enough. He swore he didn't want the hyper shape of the huuuuuuuuge ***** and butt. But. So, this is SR at original non-bumped up shape and height (6'2" or so)

Comments, dudes? Not curvy enough? Ummmm.... objectify away, folks! :)

NSFW: https://www.flickr.com/photos/157137235@N03/50077254526/in/dateposted/

(fwiw: the orange dress one is raw screenshot, the strawberry one is a little PShop)

 

 

 

Everwinter 070820_002 copy.jpg

The Finder 070620 signed no nip.jpg

missed your pics in here

c5f8c7a63bca3f966e997f32b8a789c2.jpg

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56 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

stuff

 

1) There certainly are women who enjoy being "objectified." Sometimes, that's their particular kink. And that's absolutely fine: feel free to do that in a more intimate setting, which is a more appropriate context than a very public forum. (You wouldn't start pawing someone in public, would you? Same principle.) Assuming, or posting as though all women want to be admired solely on the basis of what you consider to be their "do-ability" is insulting to everyone else. Their kink isn't necessarily ours; keep it to your communications with them.

more stuff

:::waves hand in air::: "ME! me!" I do enjoy being objectified. And I could get all school-marmy lecturey as to why, but meh. However, and this is a big "however" I am not a submissive to the grid. I don't share my kink with the whole grid. And so even in BDSM sims, I do not consent to being objectified (or anything else) by random pixels with male attachments. (Or female ones for that matter, or non-binary, or... flying toasters.) So, yup, I can get all high-horse miffed with inappropriate comments, too. As you were describing.

Another however, though, in this case, in this thread, on this topic, I did say "objectify" and so I am cool with it. (And no, Scylla, you didn't say otherwise and so people shouldn't jump down your throat as if you did.)  I'm cool with it for ME, in THIS thread. That does not mean I consent for everyone.

I don't know why all of this "appropriate" stuff is necessary to explain. It just seems like common sense and politeness and respect... but then again, those aren't all that common.

Edited by Seicher Rae
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8 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

::waves hand in air::: "ME! me!" I do enjoy being objectified. And I could get all school-marmy lecturey as to why, but meh. However, and this is a big "however" I am not a submissive to the grid. I don't share my kink with the whole grid. And so even in BDSM sims, I do not consent to being objectified (or anything else) by random pixels with male attachments. (Or female ones for that matter, or non-binary, or... flying toasters.) So, yup, I can get all high-horse miffed with inappropriate comments, too. As you were describing.

Thanks Seicher. I'm not in the position of being able to speak from that particular perspective -- and so I didn't. Thank you for doing so, and so very rationally and sensibly.

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My second life has always been, is, and will continue to be, totally mixed with real life, my name is Nando, just like the avatar, and if someone looks at my profile, they will see that there is a lot of information about me in the so-called Real Life. Having said that, it goes without saying that each person has their choices and ways of relating to "the worlds" and "images" and I always try to respect them in their opinions and peculiarities. But whatever "world" they are ... there is mainly a common denominator: the creature behind the keyboards and that is what interests me.

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23 hours ago, TT120 said:

Quietly enjoying the pics and not saying a word so as to not get blasted for objectifying women.  We are not allowed to openly enjoy the beauty of women.  At least not in the US where I'm from. 

Things are simple.

If a woman likes a man "usually" she enjoys being objectified by him. Never met a woman that would tell me "wtf Nick why do you like my ass or body that much." and that's normal because she likes to be desired by the man she also likes. (if one did i would definitely avoid meeting her again.) Same way tha when a woman grabbed my ass for example i never said "wtf are you doing! am i an object to you?"

If a woman doesn't like a man most of the time she will be annoyed.

There are cases of course that some women enjoy the attention regardless and don't mind.

(p.s Talking about straight women and always about RL. SL is just mesh objects)

Edited by Nick0678
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33 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

Things are simple.

If a woman likes a man "usually" she enjoys being objectified by him. Never met a woman that would tell me "wtf Nick why do you like my ass or body that much." and that's normal because she likes to be desired by the man she also likes. (if one did i would definitely avoid meeting her again.) Same way tha when a woman grabbed my ass for example i never said "wtf are you doing! am i an object to you?"

If a woman doesn't like a man most of the time she will be annoyed.

There are cases of course that some women enjoy the attention regardless and don't mind.

(p.s Talking about straight women and always about RL. SL is just mesh objects)

Hi Nick.

Thanks for these interesting insights into "what women like." They are based, I'm sure, on really extensive research.

If I might add a bit of, you know, nuance?

Wanting to be "desired," sexually or otherwise, is not the same thing as wanting to be "objectified." When women have sex (with a man or a woman), they generally want to be desired as a whole person. They want their partner to like them, to respect them, to love them even, sometimes, and not just for their interesting anatomical bits.

Objectifying someone, man or women, disregards them as full human beings. It treats them as a series of interesting and convenient flesh parts that you can do fun things with. You can't "make love" to an object -- you can only have sex with it.

Now, again, there are times when some women (and, maybe, some men!) want to be objectified. That's a kink, and again, it's fine. But it's by no means universally always true, even among women who do find that a turn on.

So, it's maybe a bit more complicated than your "simple" explanation?

Of course, I'm merely a woman. What do I know, right?

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5 minutes ago, Scylla Rhiadra said:

Hi Nick. etc...

i will quote what i already said which "covers" everything.

44 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

If a woman doesn't like a man most of the time she will be annoyed.

There are cases of course that some women enjoy the attention regardless and don't mind.

 

Edited by Nick0678
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