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Interesting Question About Our AV's and Friendships


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18 minutes ago, Lewis Luminos said:

This. It's all very well saying you only go for personality, but you can't know that on first meeting, so you still need to make a decision based on other factors. One of those factors is going to be the avatar's appearance (unless you are using a text-only viewer, or you are legitimately blind).

That may be a deciding factor for a lot of people but not for me, actually i almost always have Show Friends Only enabled and Voice disabled so you could say in SL terms that i am blind and deaf when it comes to those who roam around.

Regarding friends I have an easy way to decide who i consider a friend and who is just a person that we simply talk and of course adding a person in my SL friend list doesn't mean i consider them a friend. The deciding factor according to my logic and the way i prefer to play Second Life  is how easily we interact, what interests we have in common plus if the other person is comfortable to talk in RL, Skype etc

So the fact that someone has spend 50-100euros to make a fancy avatar or prefer to look whatever in SL never bothered me. It really has to do with personal choices and how a person chooses to interact with other people in SL. You can dress an idiot like a king but still will be an idiot.

1 hour ago, Lewis Luminos said:

I'd message the bottom two for sure. The top two, maybe. It would depend more on the profile in those two cases. And the responses so far prove that appearance is very much a subjective thing. Everyone has different opinions on what they consider to be an attractive or interesting avatar. Heck, some people even think my avatar is unusual and interesting 😄

Yes and the choices are endless. SL unlike other games has plenty of options to choose from and make the virtual character look like anything.

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Is it wrong that I was licking my screen?

I think there is probably an initial "attraction", so to speak, of who you are drawn to, because let's face it, we're shallow!  But it does take more than pretty pixels to keep interest and maintain a

Personally, I'm wary of anyone visiting an escort area but hey, that's just me. 

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4 hours ago, RowanMinx said:

I'm sure that 'bad vibe' might be appropriate in some instances.  I will say that I and friends have dressed up in odd/creepy/inappropriate avatars just for sh**s and giggles.  I'm not creepy (at least I don't think I am) yet I do love to just goof around at times.  

You reminded me of years ago when two friends and I used to put on Nutella Jar avatars and go to strip clubs for lap dances!!!  And another one who would put on a fat shape with me, dress skanky and hit the clubs!

I miss them, and those days!!  

 

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22 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said:

And another one who would put on a fat shape with me, dress skanky and hit the clubs!

We used to hit the beaches ( the adult ones too). The point is to have fun.

Screenshot_2020-08-09_03-02-05.thumb.jpg.8f5b3b57fb735ea466ade40d32ef572e.jpg

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7 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

I had an old lady avatar and a purse used to hit people.  I only hit friends of course.  You said it Nick.  It's all about having fun.

OMG!!! Monty Python!!! I love it!!!

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1 hour ago, RowanMinx said:

I had an old lady avatar and a purse used to hit people.  I only hit friends of course.  You said it Nick.  It's all about having fun.

Of course and to be honest whenever i meet a person who has forgotten that SL is also a game and is only obsessed with dressing the avatar my usual reaction is....

giphy.gif

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19 minutes ago, Bagnu said:

I disagree about SL being a game, but we all have our own opinions on that.

Sure that is why i said :is "also" a game. It does have many aspects. Some call it a game, some call it a social app, some call it a virtual world, others a virtual chatroom, others see it as an opportunity to do business and the list goes on, It depends on a persons point of view and what is the reason they choose to login.

It isn't reality for sure though so it's best for people to feel relaxed, have fun and enjoy it.

Edited by Nick0678
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11 hours ago, Nick0678 said:

That may be a deciding factor for a lot of people but not for me, actually i almost always have Show Friends Only enabled and Voice disabled so you could say in SL terms that i am blind and deaf when it comes to those who roam around.

Now I am confused. Didn't you say somewhere else that you communicate only in voice? 

I also have voice almost permanently disabled. I don't own a headset or a mic and my speakers are for music, which is on permanently when I am in SL. The only occasions I'll turn voice on are when I'm listening to some kind of lecture, class or presentation, or if I am communicating with someone who is blind and unable to read text (which has actually not yet happened in all my 14 years in SL).

So one of my other criteria for making friends with someone in SL is their willingness to communicate in text only.

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2 hours ago, Lewis Luminos said:

Now I am confused. Didn't you say somewhere else that you communicate only in voice? 

I probably have said that i prefer voice because writing becomes boring after a while, of course i turn voice on when i am about to talk with friends or anyone if i am not skyping with somebody at that moment.

The music part coming from speakers etc in case i don't have a headset on never bothered them, pulseaudio echo cancelation/noise reduction works great on filtering that.

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Yes and no, I'd say. I'm not a huge socialite; in fact, I'm pretty shy and going out is pretty rare. When I do go out, I find myself intimidated by bigger crowds of people and end up viewing certain avatars as intimidating, whereas others are more approachable. I've noticed the more "serious" (i.e realistic human appearance, a resting b face, "confident" type AOs with authoritative body posture, etc) the avatar looks, the less likely I am to interact with them unless prompted.

Profiles definitely favor in too, as I tend to snoop. I might try to strike up a conversation regardless of avatar looks. If the profile is empty and the chat is dead, though, and all I have to go off of are avatar looks, I can definitely say I've been spooked away from talking to a lot of groups I've spotted around my occasional exploration attempts lol.

 

Though on the same token, it can be pretty hard to judge fully on appearance when I run around like this.

n8U6Wxh.png

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The whole how does avatar appearance affect friendships question reminds me of something that happened to me a few years back.

I was at a sim, on a dance pole, when I started chatting with this guy. Things were going pretty well, when another guy came by I was friends with. This second guy had bought art from me in the past, so I greeted him enthusiastically. Guy number two had a system avi. Guy number one was mesh. Guy one who I had been hitting it off with asked me why I would talk to someone with a system avi, and then told me that if I would lower myself to his level, I was not good enough for him, and he promptly blocked me. In this case it wasn't just my appearance but the appearance of my friends that this guy cared about.

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I take it for granted that many approach others on the basis of appearance but, one way or the other, a functional friendship only exists after frequently dealing with, and openly liking, each other. By that time most people know that avatar compliments go exactly nowhere with me; some will give up trying after 5 minutes, some within days, but they won’t be friends.

So no, I don’t think it influences mine.

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I find that it's a pleasure to see avatars that are weird/interesting/fun and show a some effort to personalise but it can be anything really and it doesn't need to have cost much if anything.  It doesn't stop me chatting with people at all.  There is another side of me that loves clothes and appreciates good looking and well dressed avatars in semi-realistic "real life" way.  My brain tends to think of the two types of avatar as separate worlds.

It's what comes out of the chat box that really makes the difference though.  I've had the most fun chatting people that have the oddest avatars (I like odd).  I often forget to look at profiles until a long time after the conversation started/ended so that doesn't really matter much at first either.  Sometimes that is a good thing because I am often more put off by what I find there.

Edited by Gabriele Graves
Thought clarification.
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I find I judge people far more by how they look in real than I do on Second Life. In real life, how a person presents themselves can sometimes tell you a lot about them. The same can be argued for SL, but I think on SL it comes more often than not down to the "fun" factor. Whatever you have fun wearing, being then do it! Your actions and how you treat other in-world should speak far louder than how you choose to present yourself. 

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53 minutes ago, kirishimarabbit said:

I find I judge people far more by how they look in real than I do on Second Life. In real life, how a person presents themselves can sometimes tell you a lot about them. The same can be argued for SL, but I think on SL it comes more often than not down to the "fun" factor. Whatever you have fun wearing, being then do it! Your actions and how you treat other in-world should speak far louder than how you choose to present yourself. 

Of course!

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On 8/8/2020 at 1:24 PM, Talligurl said:

Anything we created is a reflection of the creator, so if someone puts thought and effort into thier avi, then that avi will be a reflection of who they are. Of course some people don't do anything other than choosing a pre-made avi, but then even that choice says something about the chooser. Of course it is only a partial reflection. It does not represent the whole person behind the avi.

 

This nails it.

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On 8/9/2020 at 8:19 PM, Talligurl said:

The whole how does avatar appearance affect friendships question reminds me of something that happened to me a few years back.

I was at a sim, on a dance pole, when I started chatting with this guy. Things were going pretty well, when another guy came by I was friends with. This second guy had bought art from me in the past, so I greeted him enthusiastically. Guy number two had a system avi. Guy number one was mesh. Guy one who I had been hitting it off with asked me why I would talk to someone with a system avi, and then told me that if I would lower myself to his level, I was not good enough for him, and he promptly blocked me. In this case it wasn't just my appearance but the appearance of my friends that this guy cared about.

That is just simply awful and offensive!!! 

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53 minutes ago, Bagnu said:

That is just simply awful and offensive!!! 

why? it's common practice, have a look a the employment section, and in special your own branch .. mesh, good avi, good head, good AO,.... all requirements or you can forget it.

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That is true Alwin, but none of the requirements is that their customers have to be all that. But that is basically what happened to Talli. A classic example of trash taking itself out.
If someone would start crap like that with me, they'd get an earfull and I'd point out all their own flaws.

What an avi looks like has little to no bearing on whether or not I become friends with that person. A good friend of mine only ever wears one of the system-starter avatars. Likewise, someone I was very close with - they left to focus on their career - used a horribly outdated looking furry avatar. That's one of the kindest, smartest, funniest people I know.  Also, I know a few people who are regularely gushed over for their good looks, but I've expereienced their personalities, and their abusive, manipulative tendencies. There are of course, well put together mesh avies that are pleasant and interessting people, and there are pixelmesses whos insides are just as crappy as their outsides. 
I try to give everyone a chance. 

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On 8/10/2020 at 3:19 AM, Talligurl said:

This second guy had bought art from me in the past, so I greeted him enthusiastically. Guy number two had a system avi. Guy number one was mesh. Guy one who I had been hitting it off with asked me why I would talk to someone with a system avi, and then told me that if I would lower myself to his level, I was not good enough for him, and he promptly blocked me.

Lets be fair, when it comes to #1 you didn't miss anything interesting it was just another idiot who thinks his avatar is himself and definitely looks like sh*t in RL.

Probably hasn't taken a shower recently either..

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