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I think a lot really has to do with people still being cooped up for so long and so much change happening this summer..   Even a lot of introverts are like, C'mon! Let me outta here!! \o/

God you people need thicker skins. It is cartoon avatars, get over it.

Just now, Jordan Whitt said:

I dunno.  I worry about some people 🤐

I finally realized I'm wasting my worry on some that don't really deserve it. Deserve isn't the word I really want to use but since I can't come up with a better one it will have to do for now.

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In world, people can be ejected/banned by any old schmuck that has the money to pay for the land, for any reason whatsoever. That's a little bit of incentive to behave. Here on the forums, only breaking LL's rules gets you in trouble.

Much more latitude here.

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3 minutes ago, Paul Hexem said:

In world, people can be ejected/banned by any old schmuck that has the money to pay for the land, for any reason whatsoever. That's a little bit of incentive to behave. Here on the forums, only breaking LL's rules gets you in trouble.

Much more latitude here.

You behavin' Paul?

(I always lie and say I am when folks ask me :P)

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10 hours ago, Bagnu said:

I have received accusations and insults though. 

An accusation is not necessarily uncivil and pointing out antisocial behaviour as people might perceive it is not necessarily an insult. 

It is also entirely possible to be very insulting and offensive (even unintentionally) while still being "civil", as we saw the other day. Actually, one definition of "incivility" is an offensive comment.

 

 

Edited by Amina Sopwith
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4 minutes ago, Amina Sopwith said:

An accusation is not necessarily uncivil and pointing out antisocial behaviour as people might perceive it is not necessarily an insult. 

It is also entirely possible to be very insulting and offensive while still being "civil", as we saw the other day. Actually, one definition of "incivility" is an offensive comment.

 

 

Accusations are apparently considered uncivil even if said in a joking manner.  Or someone is just watching this thread way too closely and slapping the report button.

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6 minutes ago, RowanMinx said:

Accusations are apparently considered uncivil even if said in a joking manner.  Or someone is just watching this thread way too closely and slapping the report button.

I don't know about any of that. Threads about threads are always a bit risky.

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4 hours ago, AdminGirl said:

be careful who you allow to get close to you. You just never know - a time may come when that behaviour gets directed to you. I've trusted the wrong people before and got burnt for it.

This!

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7 hours ago, AdminGirl said:

Exactly this @Bagnu (Pearl), just because someone seems to be backing you at one point in time, doesn't mean they're a nice person, so be careful who you allow to get close to you. You just never know - a time may come when that behaviour gets directed to you. I've trusted the wrong people before and got burnt for it.

This is how it should always be.. never completely or blindly trust anyone ever. 

The more they sound to good to be true.. the more they are not worth your trust or belief or friendship.

But...

There is an old saying... keep your friends close but your enemies closer. 

But...

This only really matters if you worry what  random people on the internet think about you. Otherwise just block them if need be. 

You can't be hurt or shamed by others if you are shameless.  Which takes time to learn to be. 

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1 hour ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

This is how it should always be.. never completely or blindly trust anyone ever. 

The more they sound to good to be true.. the more they are not worth your trust or belief or friendship.

But...

There is an old saying... keep your friends close but your enemies closer. 

But...

This only really matters if you worry what  random people on the internet think about you. Otherwise just block them if need be. 

You can't be hurt or shamed by others if you are shameless.  Which takes time to learn to be. 

Well, I’m not a nice person. Never pretended to be. Never played one in a movie. What I am is REAL. 

I treat people how they deserve to be treated. That’s justly. 

If you’re my friend, it’s you and me, all or nothing against the world. Your enemies are my enemies. No questions asked. I don’t care if you’re right. I don’t care if you’re wrong. Your side is the ONLY side. 

Everybody knows that about me.  Now,  if you’re fake. Bad on the inside. A follower or weak. Jumpy might just burn a little to bright, for he IS the Sun 🌞, smiling down on every one.  Best look for some shade hahaha 

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1 hour ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

There is an old saying... keep your friends close but your enemies closer. 

People should learn to ignore, let go and move on otherwise they are wasting energy reacting to things/people of absolutely no value.

1 hour ago, Drakonadrgora Darkfold said:

This only really matters if you worry what  random people on the internet think about you.

That is a waste of time unless you are a celebrity or a politician and it has a negative effect on your public image/career. It's pointless to be clingy or codependent on such things.

The sun is high and so am i.

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2 minutes ago, Nick0678 said:

People should learn to ignore, let go and move on otherwise they are wasting energy reacting to things/people of absolutely no value.

That is a waste of time unless you are a celebrity or a politician and it has a negative effect on your public image/career. It's pointless to be clingy or codependent on such things.

The sun is high and so am i.

Yeah, people like you should catch some shade lol. 

Everybody is an expert lol. 

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5 hours ago, Jumpman Lane said:

I treat people how they deserve to be treated. That’s justly. 

If you’re my friend, it’s you and me, all or nothing against the world. Your enemies are my enemies. No questions asked. I don’t care if you’re right. I don’t care if you’re wrong. Your side is the ONLY side. 

You would certainly be a loyal friend!  What is someone else doing when they become your enemy....I mean how do you decide they are an enemy?  It's more than simply disagreeing with you right?

This seems very crucial to understanding civility in general, as we tend to treat our enemies with less civility than our friends.

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17 hours ago, Arielle Popstar said:
On 8/5/2020 at 10:18 AM, Luna Bliss said:


Since you like conservatives so much, a conservative actually said this, Arielle, so perhaps you should take note -- "The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing".

Actually left of center according to one of those bias tests you like us to take but I guess not as far left as you, which seems to qualify me as being in that "nefarious" conservative group you don't accuse anyone of being in. :)

I don't consider all people to the right of me nefarious at all.  And I can be civil to them unless they are hurting others in a major way.

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8 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

You would certainly be a loyal friend!  What is someone else doing when they become your enemy....I mean how do you decide they are an enemy?  It's more than simply disagreeing with you right?

This seems very crucial to understanding civility in general, as we tend to treat our enemies with less civility than our friends.

That's actually very insightful. I can't go into specifics as that would be bringing personal disputes into the forums. So, only broad strokes.

Generally, my enemies have logged into second life every day, dreaming up new ways to stab back at me and i at them until they cracked and i won. basically, they didn't like me and i didn't like them and we let each other and THE WORLD know.

You can always google me if you want specifics. some of its still online. I'm pretty sure I've gone into great detail before.

 

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15 hours ago, Jumpman Lane said:

Generally, my enemies have logged into second life every day, dreaming up new ways to stab back at me and i at them until they cracked and i won. basically, they didn't like me and i didn't like them and we let each other and THE WORLD know.

Since this thread is about incivility on the forum I'll try to stay on topic.

INCIVILITY
     rude or unsociable speech or behavior.
    
    synonyms:
    rudeness · discourtesy · discourteousness · impoliteness · lack of politeness · bad manners · ill-manneredness · lack of manners · unmannerliness · disrespect · disrespectfulness · boorishness · uncouthness · lack of refinement · ungraciousness · lack of social grace · ungentlemanly behavior · unladylike behavior · insolence · impertinence · impudence

My theory is that (barring some kind of personality disorder) it's when we consider someone an enemy that we are most likely to become uncivil. And so I'm trying to explore the concept of 'enemy'. You've said you've become enemies with others when you don't like each other, and that makes a lot of sense to me, yet I see some people disliking each other but don't feel they are enemies with each other, and so simply disliking each other can't be the whole story.

What happens when people take that final step and consider another as having no redeeming value whatsoever except the focus of one's hate? It appears to me to be a kind of 'black and white thinking' so prevalent today, where there can be no nuance and all conflict must be resolved as either good or bad with no gray areas, and not liking aspects of another, or not liking aspects which are vitally important to the 'hater', can only mean for them that the entire person is worthless.

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