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8 minutes ago, snugglebeard said:

How many of you have a partner in RL and someone else in SL?

I'm taken in RL but would consider a SL partner.

Or is that weird?

I believe many do and its not weird as long as everyone knows the boundaries

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1 hour ago, snugglebeard said:

How many of you have a partner in RL and someone else in SL?

I'm taken in RL but would consider a SL partner.

Or is that weird?

For me it would depend on what the SL partnership was based. If it's about late night cybersexting without my real life partner's knowledge, then that to me is most definitely cheating, and I would rather find out what it is that is missing in my real life to want to be pursuing such activities. I would never want to hurt my real life partner. 

I don't know what your situation is - in real or in Second Life - but if your real life partner is ok with the idea, then there is nothing stopping you.  I guess you'd have to ask yourself if it is right for YOU and your own set of circumstances. If you are just wanting to have your cake and eat it, no one is going to be happy in the end. 

 

 

 

 

 

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Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

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23 minutes ago, snugglebeard said:

Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

Do you feel like that, because Second Life has/is a virtual world, where everyone has an avatar and a made up name?

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57 minutes ago, snugglebeard said:

Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

Yes, it is a virtual dolls' house. Except no one is actually made of plastic, and unlike Barbie, Tressy and Cindy, there are brains and real emotions that get affected by this stuff.  

But you're a bloke, and we women know you're  not wired up the same. Be aware though that if you take on board an SL partner, she might be taking it a bit more seriously than you are. Be sure to be honest with her, let her know it is just an SL roleplay thing, and not a true declaration of your SLove and commitment to her. 

 

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1 hour ago, snugglebeard said:

Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

The feelings are real though, especially when they surprise you.

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I have an RL partner,  what I do online is my business and what he does on his own online that's his buisness.  It's our agreement and it's what works for us.

I'd consider an SL partner if it's the right person, but right now? i do a lot of RPing, so the only partner I have are people who get involved with my character.

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22 minutes ago, Marigold Devin said:

Yes, it is a virtual dolls' house. Except no one is actually made of plastic, and unlike Barbie, Tressy and Cindy, there are brains and real emotions that get affected by this stuff.  

But you're a bloke, and we women know you're  not wired up the same. Be aware though that if you take on board an SL partner, she might be taking it a bit more seriously than you are. Be sure to be honest with her, let her know it is just an SL roleplay thing, and not a true declaration of your SLove and commitment to her. 

 

Oh I know. I'm currently working on my ingame profile so I can be abundantly clear.

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55 minutes ago, Marigold Devin said:

But you're a bloke, and we women know you're  not wired up the same. Be aware though that if you take on board an SL partner, she might be taking it a bit more seriously than you are. Be sure to be honest with her, let her know it is just an SL roleplay thing, and not a true declaration of your SLove and commitment to her. 

Careful with the generalizations. Women and men are definitely not built the same, but men are just as likely as women to catch the feelings and take things seriously when they aren't meant to be. 

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47 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

Careful with the generalizations. Women and men are definitely not built the same, but men are just as likely as women to catch the feelings and take things seriously when they aren't meant to be. 

 

I'm an empath, and so far in my 57 years this has been my own experience, possibly (probably) because of the type of chap I tend to attract. 

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18 minutes ago, Cindy Evanier said:

Oi!  I resemble that remark 🧠  < apparently thats a brain 

Ohhh darling Cindy - and I give you a playful tap here - I meant the dolly dolls head, not you, you lovely person-behind-the-avatar that you are who obviously very much does have a brain (and one that doesn't look like a little piece of bubbly gum as that weird little thingy above does). 

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8 minutes ago, Marigold Devin said:

Ohhh darling Cindy - and I give you a playful tap here - I meant the dolly dolls head, not you, you lovely person-behind-the-avatar that you are who obviously very much does have a brain (and one that doesn't look like a little piece of bubbly gum as that weird little thingy above does). 

i know, you gave me a laugh and... it was Sindy with and S  that I had back then until she got lost with my brothers action man 🤔

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8 minutes ago, Cindy Evanier said:

i know, you gave me a laugh and... it was Sindy with and S  that I had back then until she got lost with my brothers action man 🤔

Oh buggeroo yes it was indeed with an 'S' - crikey my old bubble gum brain has failed me a little there. 

 

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2 hours ago, Cindy Evanier said:

Oi!  I resemble that remark 🧠  < apparently thats a brain 

Errr ..*scratching head* ... shouldn't that remark be resented when objecting instead of resembled ? :|

Edited by TDD123
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I tend to date workaholics in RL who are often busy and when they see how happy I am when I chatter about SL, they encourage me to occupy myself with others in game and never mind me participating in any relationships in world.

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8 hours ago, TDD123 said:

Errr ..*scratching head* ... shouldn't that remark be resented when objecting instead of resembled ? :|

 

8 hours ago, Marigold Devin said:

Nah, it's a long-known joke. 

Marigold knows me enough now to realise how I take the P out of myself often   (and many other people if I can get away with it 😇 )

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19 hours ago, snugglebeard said:

How many of you have a partner in RL and someone else in SL?

I'm taken in RL but would consider a SL partner.

Or is that weird?

Believe it or not a lot of people here do that. As long as both parties know about it and are ok with it, nothing wrong. But if you are keeping it a secret then you risk losing both when they find out.

People might have a SO or life partner in RL but have a completely different partner in sl. Or maybe a Dom or Master in RL and a different one in SL. Again as long as both know and are ok with it, nothing wrong in doing this if both parties are open or poly.

But if either is monogamous and you are doing it you are walking on very slippery grounds.

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18 hours ago, snugglebeard said:

Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

I feel this way too, and I found a guy who feels that way as well. We partnered a while and it was like we had each other's backs. Having each other in SL made the defenses we had set up to protect our RL relationships even stronger. Before I met him I didn't think I could ever partner in SL. We ended up ending it because changes in our RL schedules made it so we were almost never on at the same time. 

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21 hours ago, snugglebeard said:

Thanks for the information everyone. It seems to me that I may just not take this all that seriously. I haven't been around that long but for me it's kinda like a virtual dollhouse if that makes sense.

I'm not trying to demean anyone who thinks differently. It's all just not real to me.

That’s quite OK if your prospective SL partner knows that and goes along with it. Not all do, mostly because there’s a possible contradiction in wanting all (or most) of the perks of a ‘real’ relationship within SL, but none of the commitments—can’t have it both ways, ‘real’ for what satisfies you, unreal for what it doesn’t.

If she has the same exact expectations or lack thereof, great; but it’s gotta be clarified beforehand, for both.

Edited by Ren Toxx
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