customizing yourself..when enough is enough..

[xBaeBeex]

 

so I was looking over my alternate account last night, its one that I made about 2 weeks ago with all this "stay at home" giveaways going on..and plus the free strong face genus head..like, how could you pass that up? .. the only thing i've spend on my alt account is for a Maitreya body...because..well, i want a decent body to play with. .. i set it out as a challenge for myself, not to spend anything else on the alt account... so i got a free head, a free skin at 7DS.. a free AO,  and free clothes at Blueberry, Mesh body Friends, Evie and a feww freebies from the Market Place. ..plus hair from Sintiaka.. and I was SHOCKED how decided my av came out..like it looks good considering the ONLY money i spend was on a body.

now i went back to my Main account last night..and i was a bit disgusted with myself at all the stuff i had bought over the last say 7 or 8 months..with the premium account getting $300 a week into my account from Linden..PLUS i fill it up sometimes when i really *want* something.. which only temps me to buy MORE..more and more and more..

on my main account i swear most stuff i might wear once.. and im so embarrassed about it.. when i think to my other freebie challenge account..and how simple but pretty it is.and how it doesnt give a total headache... i had to start to wonder..Why do i need so much on my main account. ..its like a compulsive urge to buy *****..and my biggest problems for spending at the 50, 60 and 75 day sales.. 

so im TRYing to stop myself from buying.. wallet closed..i want to try and only focus on decent quality free stuff rather than always relying on lindens to buy .. because.. when is enough enough?

 

does anyone else feel the same? .. have you ever come to this crossroad and think "i need to stop" ..or "how much more do i need" ..

[Jordyn McGregor]

E v e r y d a y...and yet it doesn't stop me!  Although I have stopped myself buying things I really really like because I know I just won't use/wear them.

[xBaeBeex]

*chuckles..* i'm glad im not alone.. and i didn't even notice till i had an alt account that i wasnt going to spend money on. the money that came for the maitreya body was from my main account...so really.. i didn't spend anything on her.. and i swear, logging in is like a breath of fresh air because im not hit with so much..folders..and stuff..its Stuff. ..and im almost tempted to just "delete delete delete" stuff from my main..but then i think.. "i might use it" ..but i know i never do >_<

[Dementia Obviate]

I hear you on the 50-60-75L weekend sales. I'm getting to the point where I'm forgetting what I bought or not remembering the name of it when I want to find it. But  I'm really only buying 1000L a week and that pays my weekly rent, plus a few new items on the sales. I justify it by considering it my entertainment budget. I rarely buy clothing at full price (sorry to all the clothing creators).

[Jordyn McGregor]

18 minutes ago, xBaeBeex said:

but then i think.. "i might use it" 

Which is why I have things like a cremation oven...

[xBaeBeex]

what does that mean? ..lol

[Zzevir]

Cremation oven? That's the thing what turns dead bodies into ash. 

[BelindaN]

I think this may be "normal". My main has way too many outfits, but I do try to wear as many as I can. Despite that I have favourites, so some just gather dust. And let's face it, even with two outfit changes a day, that's only 14 in a week, and I have around 160, which I also know isn't many compared to some on here.

And yes I went through the alt thing, keep it simple, just a few outfits, blah blah blah.

It doesn't work. I'm trying hard not to spend now but even limiting my alts to sixty each........I still want to buy more everything. ♥️♥️

[Jordyn McGregor]

55 minutes ago, Zzevir said:

Cremation oven? That's the thing what turns dead bodies into ash. 

I ran out of places to bury the bodi...um I mean, I use it as a pizza oven.

[Zzevir]

23 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said:

I ran out of places to bury the bodi...um I mean, I use it as a pizza oven.

what ever floats your boat 

[Talligurl]

28 minutes ago, Jordan Whitt said:

I ran out of places to bury the bodi...um I mean, I use it as a pizza oven.

Remind me not to go over to your place for dinner.

[Fauve Aeon]

I think it’s a harmless indulgence if you are spending hobby money well within your budget on SL for fun. If something is $L250, I ask myself, ‘well...will you get a dollar’s worth of fun or amusement over that thing?’ (USD)

A cremation oven is a dandy item in my book. A unique conversation piece for sure. 🤣

[LittleMe Jewell]

9 hours ago, xBaeBeex said:

on my main account i swear most stuff i might wear once.. 

This has actually been my motto since very soon after I started back in 2007.  There are just so many things to buy and wear, that I almost always only wear something once and then I truly toss it in the trash.  The only exceptions are underclothes & stockings/socks, some basic tops that I use for layering under things, and some specialty outfits -- like Halloween avatars & such - and a couple of favorite ball gowns.  Other than that, every dress, top, skirt, pants, shorts, all get deleted as soon as I change to another outfit - and my inventory is still overflowing with clothes.

 

9 hours ago, xBaeBeex said:

i had to start to wonder..Why do i need so much on my main account. ..its like a compulsive urge to buy *****.

For me, probably.  However, in the grand scheme of things, I still don't spend that much RL money in SL, so I just flat don't worry about it much -- other than the exploding inventory.

I'm actually much better now.  In my early days, if something was on sale and I liked it, I pretty much bought it in every color that I might wear.  These days, if it isn't already a fatpack, I limit myself to only 1-2 colors with the super occasional 3rd.
 

 

[Beth Macbain]

I subscribe to the Ariana Grande method of shopping in SL... “I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.” 

If it’s something that costs over $20 in USD, I’ll take a little time to think about it but I usually end up getting it. I can only think of one large purchase in SL that I regret, but that’s more to do with the excruciatingly bad customer service I got than the item itself.

[So Whimsy]

It's funny how when I shop for clothes I nickel and dime everything but a 5k Linden house? Instant buy.

[xBaeBeex]

Yeah but see im aussie so 20usd is pretty much double for me here..which is why i really try not to put money into SL.. if i only had to spend 20 bucks here and there I'd be laughing. 

I dont go overboard with different colours and stuff when its on sale. I think my biggest purchaes were the bodies.. i get body envy of others and then i'll go out and purchase. So i startef with Maitreya... then i got Legacy, Belleza and Perky.. did i need them? .. probably not.. i mean i do love them.. but it wasnt *needed* .. another bad habit is buying skins.. i cant help myself. .. 

And finally its the fatback or two.. 

I might need to just bite the bullet and start being serious with myself and say "you never wear that" ... i swear, i am SO much better at this in rt.. "does thie spark joy" oh yes.. im one of them. ..but in SL.. *kicks a rock...*

 

[FairreLilette]

22 hours ago, xBaeBeex said:

so im TRYing to stop myself from buying.. wallet closed..i want to try and only focus on decent quality free stuff rather than always relying on lindens to buy .. because.. when is enough enough?

I will tell you a story I haven't shared here yet.  I was on SL about a year after it began (so a long, long time ago) but left for quite a while as my real life husband, a child, taking care of a home and part time job took most of my time.  

I was remembering how SL was in the beginning where there were all styles of clothing and just natural clothing but very fashionable and all the avatars just looked like people.  We had styles like Gothic, Punk, Boho...etc...but the clothes were more real looking.  Today I find so much BDSM stuff and mini skirts and the basic mini club dress I want to scream.  I just want some California natural girl clothes and bohemian...perhaps a bit like the real life Free People, but it's very hard to find.   I know there are difficulties with prim clashes so it's difficult to layer clothes but most of the clothing styles are not for me.  And, if I go shorts and tanks...it's not enough fashion...it's too boring for me.  California clothing just has way better fashion than here.  It's not stuffy...it's exciting...I can't find that here anymore.  It used to be here but not anymore.  I don't want to look like a porn sex doll and the majority of clothing for SL is that style now.

And, when SL first started it wasn't so avatar customization like it is now.  It was just make an avatar, buy some clothes you like, and then dance and chat.  No big intense avatar customization existed back then like it does now.    

I think you are thinking in the right direction for you.  Set yourself up on a budget.  You can change the course of your life into better directions...and maybe it's time for a change.  All things evolve eventually.  Reward yourself once in while in SL for making positive changes in your life.

I wish SL could be more simple and not so avatar customization like it is now.   It honestly was a better experience for me back then as it was way more focused on just getting together for a chat and goofing off.  

I'd also suggest maybe you could get a job in SL.  When SL started, a lot of us and/or most of us had a job of some kind when SL started because the vision then was this was a world, so we had a home, a job, etc.  We shopped inworld and it took time to look around and find stuff...with MP it's just so easy.  There was no MP when I was on long, long ago.  I remember when X Street started...the precursor to MP.  If you get some experience, a job could eventually pay off....maybe...but even jobs were way, way better back then and plentiful...jobs are not so plentiful now, sadly, unless you go into the "sex business" arena and/or the live musician arena with an agent.  The live musicians here can make a fairly good salary, like $20 dollars an hour.  Maybe you could be an agent?  Let people know your real life skills....you could make money here.     

Edited April 27, 2020 by FairreLilette

[Wulfie Reanimator]

-

Edited April 27, 2020 by Wulfie Reanimator

[Marianne Little]

So far I have not bought anything from the last weekend sales. It was becoming too much. Like a job, to teleport from store to store and pick up things just because they are cheap. From Friday to Sunday. I have not used much of it.

I have problems with sales. As long as it is "Ooh, cheap", I make myself forget that ten 60 L items is 600 L. Sale addicts anonymous next?

[Theresa Tennyson]

On 4/26/2020 at 2:37 AM, xBaeBeex said:

 

so im TRYing to stop myself from buying.. wallet closed..i want to try and only focus on decent quality free stuff rather than always relying on lindens to buy .. because.. when is enough enough?

 

does anyone else feel the same? .. have you ever come to this crossroad and think "i need to stop" ..or "how much more do i need" ..

The continued existence of Second Life depends on people buying things they don't need.

In this way it's just like the modern real life economy.

[FairreLilette]

34 minutes ago, Theresa Tennyson said:

The continued existence of Second Life depends on people buying things they don't need.

Yeah but as far as the sex dolly stuff...there are people who do need that stuff because they have a job here...so actually they do need it for a SL job.  

If a person is just spending and spending on sex dolly stuff but has no job...it's rather expensive habit to afford for some people.  I could justify buying some of the sex dolly stuff *if* I had a job in SL.  Otherwise, I don't have need of it and it's too expensive to afford on my own.    

I was remembering how SL was in the beginning...it was about having a life, an imaginary life...but also about just hanging out and being sort of "free".  Look at the banner at the top of this page...does that look like avatars that are spending endless money and hours on avatar customization...or just a bunch of regular folk getting together to hang out?  

To the OP:  It can be difficult to make money here but it's still worth it to try.  Put in your profile you want to be hired and what some of your skills are if you want to perhaps start looking for a SL job.  People need assistants for FB and shops (the inworld groups)...so maybe even that could be a lucrative job to look into.    

Edited April 27, 2020 by FairreLilette

[Theresa Tennyson]

8 minutes ago, FairreLilette said:

Yeah but as far as the sex dolly stuff...there are people who do need that stuff because they have a job here...so actually they do need it for a SL job.    

Theresa Tennyson sighs.

But you don't "need" a job in Second Life.

(And, of course, you don't need to be in Second Life at all.)

[FairreLilette]

15 minutes ago, Theresa Tennyson said:

Theresa Tennyson sighs.

But you don't "need" a job in Second Life.

(And, of course, you don't need to be in Second Life at all.)

Yeah, but SL is a hobby and I think hobbies are a need.  Many with a real hobby or passion to create will try to do something to help afford that hobby whether they sell goods on SL, Ebay or Etsy.  Hobbies are not so easy to afford on their own.  Some make great money on their hobby.  But, with SL, not all create...so the best bet is to get a job here.

Plus socialization is a need...and SL can provide that...however, it is a bit laggy for me in a human mesh avatar that it takes away some of the socialization probabilities.  As a Dinkie, I can socialize with 80+ tinies and no lag. 

But, I do know what you are saying Theresa...there is a difference between a need or a want.  In SL, you might need to start asking yourself "do I need this and for what reason do I need it?"  If a person can't come up with a reason that they need it...the OP may be looking at a shopping addiction.  

 

 

Edited April 27, 2020 by FairreLilette

[LittleMe Jewell]

1 hour ago, FairreLilette said:

I was remembering how SL was in the beginning...it was about having a life, an imaginary life...but also about just hanging out and being sort of "free".  Look at the banner at the top of this page...does that look like avatars that are spending endless money and hours on avatar customization...or just a bunch of regular folk getting together to hang out?  

Even in my early days, I spent tons and tons of L$ on clothing, possibly even more than I spend now - and I've never had a job in SL.  

I also spent countless hours just hanging out with friends.  It is very possible to do both.

[FairreLilette]

13 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Even in my early days, I spent tons and tons of L$ on clothing, possibly even more than I spend now - and I've never had a job in SL.  

I also spent countless hours just hanging out with friends.  It is very possible to do both.

Well, it's all unique user experience.  But, what I spent in SL "back in the day" was all from my inworld job.  So yeah, it's unique user experience.  But, I notice you say clothes here because it wasn't so avatar customization as it is now.  And, with BOM, which I think is a hassle at the moment, it's even more avatar customization with being able to wear 62 layers.  I don't have the time to put on 62 layers of stuff.  

But, still look at that banner up there...it looks like just people hanging out rather than so focused on avatar customization is what I'm trying to say.  But everyone has a different pocket book.  

Just to address shopping addiction for a minute here...I think a shopping addiction is trying to fill a void.  I think when we have a shopping addiction we need to ask ourselves what void am I trying to fill?  Because shopping can never fulfill that void, imo....maybe for a brief stretch of time but it's not sustainable; the void remains.   So, maybe then it's time to find something that is more productive...that is why I am suggesting a job...it's productive and rewarding.  

 

Edited April 27, 2020 by FairreLilette