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Ways to Meet People here on SL


DreamcatcherSirene
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Hello! Does anyone know of ways in which to meet new people of SL. I've only been on SL for a total of three months. And while, I have found people to talk with, I always feel like I'm the only one initiating the conversation. I know there's many reasons as to why people may not chat back all the time but I can't help but think "did the conversation not go so well?" Anyway, I'm open to suggestions on where to meet people here. 

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   It depends on what kind of people you wish to meet. Usually, the best way to meet people is to do something that you enjoy doing, and speak to people along the way. If you want to meet people for the sake of meeting people, there are plenty of clubs and hangout spots, but .. Well, they're usually full of other people who are just desperate for social attention and don't really know what they want for themselves either.

   As for people initiating conversations, it's usually a matter of A) what's in your profile, B) how your avatar is presented, and C) what kind of place you're at.

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8 minutes ago, Orwar said:

   It depends on what kind of people you wish to meet. Usually, the best way to meet people is to do something that you enjoy doing, and speak to people along the way. If you want to meet people for the sake of meeting people, there are plenty of clubs and hangout spots, but .. Well, they're usually full of other people who are just desperate for social attention and don't really know what they want for themselves either.

   As for people initiating conversations, it's usually a matter of A) what's in your profile, B) how your avatar is presented, and C) what kind of place you're at.

Thanks! @Orwar  I guess I'll look around and find things I'm into then.

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I would echo what @Orwar said and focus on finding places where people with shared interests congregate. It can be very difficult to break into pre-established groups at places like clubs. Spend some times browsing the groups that are around in SL. There are groups for many, many things not just parts of SL. If you are looking for specific suggestions for things you enjoy feel free to reach out and I can try and point you in the right direction.

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1 hour ago, seanabrady said:

I would echo what @Orwar said and focus on finding places where people with shared interests congregate. It can be very difficult to break into pre-established groups at places like clubs. Spend some times browsing the groups that are around in SL. There are groups for many, many things not just parts of SL. If you are looking for specific suggestions for things you enjoy feel free to reach out and I can try and point you in the right direction.

@seanabrady  I'll will most definitely do that! And thanks for your help

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As it has been said:

  • Appearance.
  • Profile.

For appearance, unlike popular believe, you don't just throw money at your avatar and call it done, having a mesh head and body doesn't mean an avatar looks great or has any personality, people can have an avatar with neither of those looking more alluring when they know what they are doing.
One of the most important elements in your avatar is your shape, most people in SL under utilize it, specially those with Bento mesh heads when they leave it close to stock, and that is what I meant when I said it's not about just throwing money at it. Think of it this way, I can go on Flickr and actually tell you the names of certain people just by looking at pictures, because they have made their avatars that memorable and with an actual identity that you can recognize them.
This is far from easy, and it DOESN'T involve throwing a million accessories on, a lesson Aesthetic thought us well.
It's a lot of hard work, but if you put it in you'll rip the rewards.

As for profile, it's all about what you want someone's first impression to be, there's really no right way to do it it comes down to taste.
But I will say this, you'll often see people using their Picks and as extension of their profile (I do this myself) the thing to remember is, Picks (not pics like it's so often referred to) were designed for people to advertise places that they like, and so when you press that New button it will automatically fill out with the parcel information you are standing on, including a teleport link to it. So do not make any while standing in your private house, I've lost count at the amount of people that asked me for help because someone was "tracking" them and found where they lived...
Also take some time to consider your display name, the group tag you'll have on, or even the groups you have on display in your profile.

When you have all that done and it's time to be social also remember the environment you are on. Finding the right place can be tricky, you'll be hard pressed to find anything good in the search result because a lot of places will game the system to come out on top, you can visit a couple of dozen of these find nothing good (trust me you won't) and then be under the impression there's nothing good in SL.
I can tell you that the good places don't really rely on advertising themselves, because that would bring the wrong crowd, instead they rely on word of mouth, people that are on them will bring other people as they see fit if they judged them to be "good enough" call it elitist and it might very well be but it's no different than RL, you cannot demand to be part of a circle.

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To me it sounds like you have figured out how to meet people, one you initiate conversations, and two you have to expect the most of those won't go anywhere. Now and then however you will make a connection that makes it worth it.

Edited by Talligurl
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On ‎1‎/‎17‎/‎2020 at 1:24 PM, DreamcatcherSirene said:

Anyway, I'm open to suggestions on where to meet people here

One suggestion is to find a place to live in SL.  Generally speaking, you can rent a nice place to live anywhere from 100 to 500 lindens a week (furnished!)  in communities where other people are living also.   Once I had established a place to live as a new person in SL,  I would occasionally interact with neighbors by saying hello etc.  Two friends today were neighbors when i first came on SL and we still check in with each other and say hello even though we live in different places today.  As a bonus, looking for places to rent an apartment or home is super fun in SL!

 

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Sometimes roaming around SL with no real sense of direction does wonders, as is wearing particular articles of clothing and etc. I've had some IMs come out of nowhere doing just that as well as having a title of mine referencing something like a favourite video-game and conversations just happen.

Winging it like that can get ya going places too.

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4 hours ago, Alwin Alcott said:

many people think it's one talk and others stick to you for years as friend... but that isn't happening, You'll (both) need to have the interest to go on the long way to become friends. Most converation is a kind of entertainment, casual and one time, no real need to do that again tomorrow.

Yeah I keep Alwin entertained with PM chats all the time and we aren't even inworld friends  😇

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8 hours ago, Alwin Alcott said:

many people think it's one talk and others stick to you for years as friend... but that isn't happening, You'll (both) need to have the interest to go on the long way to become friends. Most converation is a kind of entertainment, casual and one time, no real need to do that again tomorrow.

Some people have put it like this that the friends list is a contact list or acquaintance list and I think that sounds accurate indeed.

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50 minutes ago, Simo Vodopan said:

Some people have put it like this that the friends list is a contact list or acquaintance list and I think that sounds accurate indeed.

I see friend list as a doorbell, nothing more (I don't rely on a list to determine if someone is a friend or not). The purpose of the friend list is to notify you when they come or go, so you can get together to do stuff. If you want to be on my friend list and we don't ever do anything together, why should I suffer the ding-dong every time you come and go?

This is why there are Calling Cards. I actually use those.

Edited by Alyona Su
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Just now, Alyona Su said:

I see friend list as a doorbell, nothing more (I don't rely on a list to determine is someone is a friend or not). The purpose of the friend list is to notify you when they come or go, so you can get together to do stuff. If you want to be on my friend list and we don't ever do anything together, why should I suffer the ding-dong every time you come and go?

This is why there are Calling Cards. I actually use those.

For reasons like that and many others my friends-list is a rather small one. There are only about a couple of two or so people I could consider as genuine friends that I talk to semi-frequently.

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I mean honestly the best way I have gotten to know people on SL is by putting myself out there in certain communities. Usually it just starts off with a simple "hello" and see if they respond within a conversation. So, with that, don't be afraid to be yourself and put yourself out there! I know it sounds cheesy, but yeee.

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