Jump to content
LexxiXhan

What does an SL relationship mean to you?

Recommended Posts

8 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

As in...?

   I was thinking more like ...

Arya_hitlist.gif

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For me, a SL relationship means to be with likeminded people who share some interests and values with me but who do not need to glue to my hip once i logged in. I am always very carefull about whom i let close and take my time to get to know them. Once i know (or think to know) they are mature enough to not want to cross the line between SL and RL (as a dating service!), i am all fine. My former long-term relatioinships (the last lasted around 9 years) started always in RP Sims. I find it ideal. We were able to get playfully known to each other and had plenty of time to figure out if we would get along in OOC, and also there was the RP aspect as a shared interest. 

I am always upfront and make it clear that SL is and will remain SL only. My RL is out of question as i do not want to change anything and once i logged out of SL, SL stopped to exist till i logged in again. 

Of course i am, while i am logged in, reliable to my friends (male and female) and once trust is there, even RL problems and happiness will be part of it all. 

  • Like 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said:

Precisely why I had to take you off my list!

   Because you suddenly realized that killing me would be bad, as you wouldn't know what to do without me - or because the fear of my morbid and cynical outlook on life outweighs the attraction?

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Beth Macbain said:

As in...?

giphy.gif.538ca4e7a3ceca2827b949007eae7da4.gif

Momo and I keep telling him that and he just doesn't believe us.  lol

  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Orwar said:

   Because you suddenly realized that killing me would be bad, as you wouldn't know what to do without me - or because the fear of my morbid and cynical outlook on life outweighs the attraction?

All of the above? 😬

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Conall DeCuir said:

For me, a SL relationship means to be with likeminded people who share some interests and values with me but who do not need to glue to my hip once i logged in. I am always very carefull about whom i let close and take my time to get to know them. Once i know (or think to know) they are mature enough to not want to cross the line between SL and RL (as a dating service!), i am all fine. My former long-term relatioinships (the last lasted around 9 years) started always in RP Sims. I find it ideal. We were able to get playfully known to each other and had plenty of time to figure out if we would get along in OOC, and also there was the RP aspect as a shared interest. 

I am always upfront and make it clear that SL is and will remain SL only. My RL is out of question as i do not want to change anything and once i logged out of SL, SL stopped to exist till i logged in again. 

Of course i am, while i am logged in, reliable to my friends (male and female) and once trust is there, even RL problems and happiness will be part of it all. 

I have some of the same thoughts.  It's impossible for me now to turn an SL relationship into reality (once it happened but was disastrous in both worlds).

I dislike being rushed or surprised; my brain prefers a clear situation or it races to examine every detail and make sense of it, and then I often end up making bad decisions, giving in to pressure.  I too do not want to be at someone's side all the time or constantly advertising my relationship (the disaster insisted on my wearing a group title that marked me as his property). 

Friendship, with good conversation and some shared activities appeals to me more at the moment; I leave the rest to the future.

I realise the OP wanted rather to hear thoughts about current relationships but I have none.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
38 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said:

(the disaster insisted on my wearing a group title that marked me as his property)

When I see couples with cutesy group tags, or the need to state someone is someone else's property like that, I assume it either is, or will soon be, a Very Bad Relationship, and that those people should be avoided at all cost due to the extraordinarily high probability of drama. 

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 hours ago, Orwar said:

   I may well go through a marriage ... A dark, epic marriage that will be more akin to a funeral, with possible hints of Devil worship and ritualistic sac-- I mean. The cake is going to be awesome, black and baroque! And I already have a collection of hearses to serve as the carriage!

I dunno, ladies, this actually might put Orwar ON my list. I could think of a few happy ritualistic sacrifices cake that would make it a most celebratory day. A dark, gothic ceremony would be cool.

Too bad I'm still boycotting Orwar due to his queasiness of giving me a kiss to appease Forumites.

Edited by Seicher Rae
  • Haha 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
48 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

Too bad I'm still boycotting Orwar due to his queasiness of giving me a kiss to appease Forumites.

   Queasiness? I just didn't want to end up #MeToo'd! If you want to be kissed, you have to either say so or make it apparent beyond any reasonable doubt that you'd like to be. Like this.

   Leans in a bit, puckering up his lips and closes his eyes.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Provided you're honest with the other person or people, SL relationships can easily be literally anything. 

With that in mind, for me they mean opportunities.

  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, Orwar said:

   Queasiness? I just didn't want to end up #MeToo'd! If you want to be kissed, you have to either say so or make it apparent beyond any reasonable doubt that you'd like to be. Like this.

   Leans in a bit, puckering up his lips and closes his eyes.

/me keeps eyes open but leans in letting him know to lean in further. At the last nanosecond, as he's moving forward, I step aside so that he falls forward.  taa daa!

/me smiles sweetly and looks innocent

It's not that I wanted to be kissed, just that the mere thought of it wouldn't send someone into "recovery."

  • Haha 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
12 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

It's not that I wanted to be kissed, just that the mere thought of it wouldn't send someone into "recovery."

   I already explained that! Pff, girls.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, Orwar said:
13 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

It's not that I wanted to be kissed, just that the mere thought of it wouldn't send someone into "recovery."

   I already explained that! Pff, girls.

:::bats eyelashes:::

1. Just because you explained it doesn't mean we have to believe it.

2. Even if we believe it that doesn't mean we have to act like it or acknowledge it. 

3. It is all about what suits us best, at any given moment (and of course that can change, and frequently does).

4. Men. pppthth  I don't understand what they don't understand about us.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, Beth Macbain said:

When I see couples with cutesy group tags, or the need to state someone is someone else's property like that, I assume it either is, or will soon be, a Very Bad Relationship, and that those people should be avoided at all cost due to the extraordinarily high probability of drama. 

I disagree with this Beth. Just because you see something like so and so's girl or guy, doesn't always been drama or the relationship is going to be bad. I have a tag over my head stating that I am Cam's girl, and I can assure you there is absolutely no drama and our relationship is very strong. So in at least one assumption you've made is wrong. Assumptions are almost always wrong. I'm not saying that some relationships are toxic or dramatic, and those relationships don't always wear a tag over their heads. Just sayin'

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm going to echo @Talligurl and @BelindaN here.. I keep SL relationships within SL. Yes, i have RL feelings for all my friends, its human nature to do so. However, I don't Adult message anyone out of SL. Aside from my RL wife. WHat happens in SL stays there. And like BelindaN I do not have monogamous relations in SL. I learned my lessons long ago. Back when i first started in SL i had a few monogamous relationships. They ended very very badly. In two of them they wanted to go RL even though i had said many times it was SL only and i would not leave my wife for someone in SL. The third one actually showed up at my house, she had my address as i foolishly exchanged RL Christmas cards with her. Picture having a nice family dinner with my in-laws and a complete stranger rings the bell professing undying love to you.. Yeah, that went over like a lead balloon.. 

Trust was and is a big thing for me. I can honestly say i don't fully trust what anyone says in SL to me. How could I? I a not speaking face to face with them, there are thousands of things we pick up on in RL meetings that simply aren't there in SL. 

In SL, I am here to have fun, make clothing, and just enjoy my SL. My wife does the same, well, she makes jewelry but you get my point. If ever someone cant handle my free spirit, tI genty show them the door and add them to my Orb of Defending +5. That was a little D&D humour there.. 

  • Like 7

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
21 hours ago, anniepany said:

I disagree with this Beth. Just because you see something like so and so's girl or guy, doesn't always been drama or the relationship is going to be bad. I have a tag over my head stating that I am Cam's girl, and I can assure you there is absolutely no drama and our relationship is very strong. So in at least one assumption you've made is wrong. Assumptions are almost always wrong. I'm not saying that some relationships are toxic or dramatic, and those relationships don't always wear a tag over their heads. Just sayin'

I have seen hundreds of men and women with the "so and so's girl/guy" name tags above their heads.. And time after time they are in places where monogamy just inst the thing.. I have to wonder why they are in adult sims looking for adult times without their "special someone" their "ONE AND ONLY!"  

Edited by Drake1 Nightfire
schpelling
  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

I have seen hundreds of men and women with the "so and so's girl/guy" name tags above their heads.. And time after time they are in places where monogamy just inst the thing.. I have to wonder why they are in adult sis looking for adult times without their "special someone" their "ONE AND ONLY!"  

I didn't say that some people with "tags" over their heads, aren't looking for drama and extra "fun" but that's not EVERYONE and to assume that EVERYONE is doing this is wrong. Just sayin'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, anniepany said:

I didn't say that some people with "tags" over their heads, aren't looking for drama and extra "fun" but that's not EVERYONE and to assume that EVERYONE is doing this is wrong. Just sayin'

Neither did I... 

10 hours ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

I have seen hundreds of men and women with the "so and so's girl/guy" name tags above their heads.. And time after time they are in places where monogamy just inst the thing.. I have to wonder why they are in adult sims looking for adult times without their "special someone" their "ONE AND ONLY!"  

If hundreds of people equates to everyone in your mind....

Just sayin.. Methinks the lady doth protest too much.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm gonna say, I love how many opinions are already on this thread. With that, I want to post mine. 

My opinion on SL relationships have always been diverse. Depending on the parties involved between two or more people, I just say, 'you do you boo,' as long as it works for you and whoever is involved.

From my standpoint, if I am ever getting into a relationship in SL, I always hope for it to branch more into real life to the point where it could possibly become a real life relationship, and blossom from there. I've always had a fantasy of meeting someone online...and luckily, I have met someone; we are currently in works of meeting and all that. It's gone well so far, of getting to know them. 

So to conclude, I just want to say, you do you boo...in whatever works for you via SL or IRL. <3 Bless you all.

  • Like 5
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

♡ Relationship start with yourself first  mastering yourself your passion your authenticity knowing your enough and loved that when its the right time you don't think it but you manifest this and it hits you straight from the heart. ♡

♡ To grow a connection build in to friendship  with trust and exchanging  energy  maybe more but does not mean a instant relashionship with anyone. But don't seek or look or chase if you find a great connection that sparks your soul that is unexpected then let it flow.  Not single, not  taken,on reserve,one who  deserves my♥ it truly takes someone special to wake it up.  You can’t force a connection.We meet the right people at the right time under the right circumstance through natural vibration.  Love comes comes unexpected when you least expect it but allow it to flow.  Its not a dating data base yes their is love all around second life is a getaway filled with romance. Don't play the desperate begging for love its simple creepy can scare people away don't jump in to something right away you can get hurt let love grow over time.   Being  demisexual   has to have strong emotional connection and feeling build in a connection. 

 

♡ keep looking not for a person but for your passion, Your Love, Your Courage, Your goals, your Dreams., your happiness, yourself. keep looking. Explore your worth before you explore another. know your worth. Know yourself only then will you know what you need over what you want. You need yourself to become your own.♡

♡ Just play first.Dance,sing,read to each other,breathe together-communicate. Don't count on sex to be the door to intimacy. It's the other way around: First develop intimacy skills. Then make love to enjoy them. "  ♡

 

 

♡  The best kind of love loves is unexpected you don't seek or beg or look you let go of fear when you have a soul connection that sparks your soul and theirs the soul flame. These song go well with it  savage garden I know loved you & Truly madly Deeply.  You can read them in the eyes in the soul you see the beauty of the aura from the outside talking to them   for hours like you know them in another life time. ♡

 

P.S.

♡ May not be for all your freewill its your second life your choice what you choose but good to think before you leap and have leap of faith to test the waters. ♡

 

gifloveto.gif

Edited by Vanoralynna
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm one of those people whose SL and RL are inextricably linked.  My RL husband is my SL partner... and we met inworld.  We've been married for 10 years, and we look forward to many, many more :)

My friends also cross over; I've met several SL friends in RL as well.  I'm friends with many on Facebook, under my RL profile -- Facebook, for some reason, believes Ajay is not a real person and has locked down that account -- with either their SL avatar, their RL self, or both.

That said, I know not everyone has such a ridiculously meshed SL and RL, and I respect the fact that for many folks, SL and RL remain separate.  It's all about what works for the individual people and their relationship dynamics.

Edited by Ajay McDowwll
Formatting is our friend.
  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Any romantic relationships I’ve had/will have mixes SL & RL.  NEVER to the point that we’re going to get together and live happily ever after.  But, I talk about my RL regularly, current and past rl relationships.   No matter how good the text, the toons only just don’t do it for me.  As a domme, many of the tasks I give are to be done in RL.

An ex offered to buy/give me a laptop to replace mine so I could continue to play, and I wouldn’t accept.  I ended our SL partnership since I had no idea how long I’d be gone, allowing him to play as he wanted.  We remained friends on FB, after he stopped playing SL.  Four years  later I’m back.

I’ve had my subs wear my tag.  And, I don’t do any drama.  It’s even in my profile that if you’re more drama than fun, you’re gone.  The ex of 2010 was the reason, and I’ve had none since him.  Even when a relationship ended, it was simply wish you well thing, and remained friends.

 

 

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

So I’ve been with the same person in SL since 2005. What I value in that relationship is the same thing I would value in a RL relationship; empathy, humor, familial altruism,  compatible kinks, good conversation and maturity to see beyond the “bumps in the road” that derail so many relationships.

Do we always get along perfectly? No

Are we COMPLETELY compatible? No

Are we a “traditional (vanilla) couple”? Hell No

Do we prefer “making it work” to the alternatives? Absolutely 

I like having someone about who can complete my sentences. “Old couple hive mind” may annoy other people (and it can intimidate new members of a Poly relationship), but it makes me warm and fuzzy to have reached that point. Probably because we had to earn it.

IMHO  the world has a lot of people who *want* an idealized relationship, but a lesser amount of people who are willing to do the work for one that lasts.

But it is so VERY worth it.

giphy.gif?cid=4d1e4f29588f499889418aaf60

 

Edited by AmandaKeen
Typonese
  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...