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Beth Macbain

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Posted (edited)

Apparently I woke up feeling the need to tell people they are idiots. I've always wondered how one manages to wake up in an entirely different mood from the day before. I don't remember my dreams, which is a good thing because the ones that I do remember are pretty awful, so I guess I'll blame the need to carp at people on some stupid dream. Anyway, the Internet was created so that if you wake up feeling the need to tell idiots that they are idiots that you can do so anonymously and while in your PJs drinking morning coffee. That and cat memes... oh and porn, can't forget that, but that's why the Internet was created. 

So I blew off steam by reading and then responding to political/coronavirus comments on NPR's Facebook feed. Ahhh. It is almost too easy. Too easy would be to go to FOX's site, but even I'm not crazy enough to wander over there even for sport. The trick to blowing off steam is to not take it seriously, don't get involved in arguments (just hit and run), and keep it to a minimum. The more time you spend venting on Facebook (and similar), the more it sucks you dry and destroys your mind and heart and soul. So, yeah, a few well written, snarkily clever sentences aimed at people who think that old people should just get sick and die so that other people get back to work as normal... I feel somewhat better.

With that off my chest it is time to get back to being my usual sunny, people-loving self. [sarcasm font]  

TS snake hiss.gif

TS gif to ♥ Beth.

Edited by Seicher Rae
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Posted (edited)
35 minutes ago, Tari Landar said:

:::snipped story:::

I hate the world for her, because the world we live in, rl and sl, is a world that can't and won't accept her for her, and she's struggling with that, but putting in so much damn effort, and I can't fix it, but if anyone deserves it to be fixed, it's her. 

Why are people so damn jerky..totally rhetorical, no need to answer. I'm just mad at the world, because the world is stupid and I just need to be mad at it for a while. I know, these issues seem minor in the grand scheme of recent events, but they're really not. Even one person feeling the way she's feeling right now in the world, is a big issue, and I'm certain she's not alone.

I responded to your comment with a "thank you" for good reason, although I also wanted to use the nonexistent hug emoji. 

I cried reading your post. I'm still crying. Why? I hurt for your friend. I hurt for you. I also am so thankful for you for your friend. I have no idea what your friend's issues are, even though you alluded to some. I don't need to know. But a lot of your story rang true about me and things I've been struggling with. It is also my natural tendency to withdraw further and further when hurting. I also get self-destructive as I hurtle down into depression. I've handled a lot of it on my own, and that sucks so much. But I also have a very good, dear friend, who like you with yours has stuck by me, even through fights. For me, I feel guilty because I rely on this person so much, too much. It isn't fair to him. I know it. He knows it. But... thank god he's there. His being there has saved my life, literally and figuratively. So, know that you are loved and appreciated back, Tari. 

Edited by Seicher Rae
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Posted (edited)
50 minutes ago, Seicher Rae said:

I responded to your comment with a "thank you" for good reason, although I also wanted to use the nonexistent hug emoji. 

I cried reading your post. I'm still crying. Why? I hurt for your friend. I hurt for you. I also am so thankful for you for your friend. I have no idea what your friend's issues are, even though you alluded to some. I don't need to know. But a lot of your story rang true about me and things I've been struggling with. It is also my natural tendency to withdraw further and further when hurting. I also get self-destructive as I hurtle down into depression. I've handled a lot of it on my own, and that sucks so much. But I also have a very good, dear friend, who like you with yours has stuck by me, even through fights. For me, I feel guilty because I rely on this person so much, too much. It isn't fair to him. I know it. He knows it. But... thank god he's there. His being there has saved my life, literally and figuratively. So, know that you are loved and appreciated back, Tari. 

Ty, really

I know she appreciates me being there, she tells me that constantly, even when I'm just around to say hi, she thanks me immensely. I know a huge part of why she does is because no one else ever is (she has very limited rl family, part of the problem, really). So I am more than happy to take her burdens on whenever she needs to unload them, and she knows this. I have been by her side in sl through all the crap other people have done. I've been by her bedside in rl hospitals, I spent days and nights with her in them when she wasn't even conscious. She knows there is literally nothing that would ever drive me away. I have finally managed getting into her head that feeling guilty for unloading on me, isn't necessary, it will never be necessary. I would be mad if she didn't lay these things on me, really. Because everyone in the world needs a sounding board, an anchor, something and somewhere they can lay their heartaches, so they don't cause too much irreparable damage. It's taken me years to get that into her had, though.  I am absolutely certain that your friend feels the same way, I can promise you that. Some us not only like being someone's person, but also need it, for reasons..

I am very grateful I can be that person for her, and very grateful to have that opportunity, because I think it helps both of us in many ways. I like having that purpose in my life, even if I hate the reason why that purpose exists in the first place. Hearing her cry, and I mean really, deeply cry and sob, to the point she can't breathe, and worse, is just so heartbreaking. Knowing why she's doing it, just makes that heartbreak worse, because it's so unnecessary. She's not crying about things that are unavoidable, she's crying and hurting because of things that are intentional on the part of others, and that's just inexcusable in my book. She deserves a better world...hell the world deserves a better world, really. I think lots of people struggle with self worth, probably all  people actually, some more than others, but it's a very normal, human thing to feel. I just hate that people are so easily able to seemingly force that kind of feeling on another person, and do it with such impunity, even self imposed, I just don't get it. Why do you have to hurt someone else simply because they're not what you desire, like, love, want to get to know, whatever...like why does that line have to be drawn, or crossed, when it is so very easy to simply walk away or never bother pretending you're going to be a better person...(I doubt that thought train makes sense, I'm rambling)

Sometimes it just makes me want to hurt people for hurting her,  it would solve nothing if I did, but if I could, I would and then I'd be in very big trouble.

Ugh, people just suck, they really do, and not the good kind. 

Edited by Tari Landar
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Posted (edited)

@Tari Landar

If it helps, you can tell your friend that she is not alone in her reactions. Her story is almost identical to mine that has played out both in SL and RL. I can only hope she doesn't end up as jaded, cynical and misanthropic as I have become because of it even though I desperately need human contact outside of the SO. I keep trying to give up forever but I keep needing other humans. It never works and like a moth to a flame... round and round. Yeah, I know. And I'm no help either really. Just keep doing what you're doing Tari. It's all anyone can do. As long as she has one friend she can believe in, she'll be ok. Not happy or content just ok. I think that's about all she and I can really hope for.

 

ETA: None of that came out quite like I meant it to but I hope you get the gist of what I'm trying to say without offending or making it look like I have it worse when that is not the case at all. I lost my sounding board when my mother died in 2005.

Edited by Selene Gregoire
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3 hours ago, Selene Gregoire said:

@Tari Landar

If it helps, you can tell your friend that she is not alone in her reactions. Her story is almost identical to mine that has played out both in SL and RL. I can only hope she doesn't end up as jaded, cynical and misanthropic as I have become because of it even though I desperately need human contact outside of the SO. I keep trying to give up forever but I keep needing other humans. It never works and like a moth to a flame... round and round. Yeah, I know. And I'm no help either really. Just keep doing what you're doing Tari. It's all anyone can do. As long as she has one friend she can believe in, she'll be ok. Not happy or content just ok. I think that's about all she and I can really hope for.

 

ETA: None of that came out quite like I meant it to but I hope you get the gist of what I'm trying to say without offending or making it look like I have it worse when that is not the case at all. I lost my sounding board when my mother died in 2005.

Nothing you said came out poorly, I know exactly what you meant, and mean, and ty. You're right, that's exactly what happens when the world around causes such turmoil and damage in someone. I'm sorry that this is how things have come to be for you as well. I don't think there is anything any individual can do to help someone once things get to that point, but if ever you need a sounding board, even for something small..don't hesitate to msg me. Even if I'm not inworld, or logged on the forums, I can see when I get a message lol. 

I don't like seeing anyone put up so many barriers that the world can't see the person beyond the walls at all. That's exactly what she does, and is doing, except this time, she's adding a few more meters between her and those walls. It's hard to watch, really. She truly is the best human being I have ever met and when she lets the rest of the world see that, it's spectacular, and she does amazing things. Now I sound creepy-ish, I'm sure, lol, but really, it's true. She knows I think this, I tell her all the time. It drives her nuts, she doesn't take compliments well. Right now she's not taking them at all. 

Sigh

It's been a heavy day, but at least she hasn't logged off, or hung the phone up on me, lol (both being part of her MO, and when either happens she isn't likely to be seen or heard from for a while), so there's that. 

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Posted (edited)
20 hours ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Here is the press release from the Dept of Education.  If they have already taken the money, they have to give it back, but who knows how long it will take:

https://www.ed.gov/news/press-releases/secretary-devos-directs-fsa-stop-wage-garnishment-collections-actions-student-loan-borrowers-will-refund-more-18-billion-students-families

 

The date of my payment was 3/11 the state of emergency was declared 3/13 I doubt I will get mine back..  but I appreciate that link.  The one time I actually file my taxes early.... 

Edited by Tarina Sewell
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1 hour ago, Tari Landar said:

I don't think there is anything any individual can do to help someone once things get to that point, but if ever you need a sounding board, even for something small..don't hesitate to msg me. Even if I'm not inworld, or logged on the forums, I can see when I get a message lol. 

I'm quoting myself..stupid, but whatever, lol.

This goes for anyone and everyone, btw. I don't care if you hate me, I don't care if you just don't like me. I don't care if you don't even know me. If you need a sounding board, for whatever reason...find me. Send me a msg here, send me a msg inworld, nc, send me a friggen carrier pigeon...don't care. Find me. I don't know that I can help, but even if I can't, keeping it in is stupid and will end up hurting you, I know it will. 

If it's not me, find someone, anywhere, just somewhere. 

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6 minutes ago, Tari Landar said:

I don't care if you hate me, I don't care if you just don't like me. I don't care if you don't even know me.

What if I know you... and I like you?

Gotcha!

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Posted (edited)
On 3/28/2020 at 9:41 AM, Marigold Devin said:

a nal.jpg

Great name for a boy band! Where are you Robbie Williams?
L0.0king.... l0.0king...🙄 

Oh mai gawd! Robbie.....  😮😲😳 
Ouchiewahwah! 🥴

Edited by Maryanne Solo
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I have spent most of the day veggie on the couch watching TV.  Started my laundry, but when the washer sang I just said 'The hell with it - I'll run it back through rinse tomorrow' - and I proceeded to put it out of my mind.

Logged in to SL and picked up a few items from some of the weekend sales, but I'm not really in the mood to do anything.

Maybe more TV, maybe a bit of reading, or maybe I'll just go to bed early.

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I'm just posting this to help the topic rise above a spamming attack of multiple posts, because nobody needs to wade through that to get solace.  I hope today goes well, or better than yesterday, for you all. 

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Posted (edited)

Well, we got a call on Wednesday that our daughters PCP(which she saw on Monday) tested positive for Covid-19... So.. Yeah... 14 days of complete isolation.. With two teen girls.. Not enough food as we were planning to go shopping that day.. No credit card to buy food from the grocery store and they cant deliver until friday anyway as EVERYONE is ordering online now. Kids cant get their breakfast and lunch from the school now. Cant go to the Food Pantry. I refuse to even remotely chance getting them sick. 

So, how am I feeling? Lost, scared(i have diabetes, makes me immune compromised|), worried as we currently lead the world in active cases and the number just.. keeps.. going.. up. Despair in knowing our fearless leader has no clue and just want his ego stroked for the piss poor job he has done or he will withhold supplies. Lets face it kids. The humans are screwed. Need to call a few family members and see if they can go shopping for us. 

 

ETA forgot to mention.. My daughter had a trip to Virginia planned with her school chorus class. They were going to sing at Bush Gardens.. No refund of $900.. "maybe we will go next year." From the teacher. I believe that as much as i believe that in 15 days Covid-19 will be gone.. 

Edited by Drake1 Nightfire
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Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

I have spent most of the day veggie on the couch watching TV.  Started my laundry, but when the washer sang I just said 'The hell with it - I'll run it back through rinse tomorrow' - and I proceeded to put it out of my mind.

Logged in to SL and picked up a few items from some of the weekend sales, but I'm not really in the mood to do anything.

Maybe more TV, maybe a bit of reading, or maybe I'll just go to bed early.

I have done NOTHING this whole weekend. Just loafed about and played on my PC.
I'm a bit overwhelmed at how to approach partial loss of income & family are away at sisters safe haven in our alpine region.
Less than 80 people in total live there? Everything is paid for here so its not that big a deal.
I am very lucky because my RL business has been ready to fire for a good while now and so it shall be.
Don't know who's going to be buying though.
looks like a miracle sales tactic is whats needed. I'll worry about that tomorrow.
I'll have to wave my magic wand which is a clear graphite molten metal stirring rod. (for jewellery precious metals).
It's the best (pretend) Faerie wand I have ever seen :))) I absolutely love it ❤️

Edited by Maryanne Solo
Waved wand :)
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Worried.

I had to have the chat with my son AGAIN that unless he wants his father and me to die he needs to stay at home.

Which then brought up the conversation with my husband about what will we do if the other one dies.  Where are the bills kept, who manages the life insurance,  what we want done with our bodies and is the will current.  That sort of stuff.  Always a load of laughs having that sort of talk :(

Yet still optimistic.  Plan for the worst, hope for the best.

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Yeah ^^^ all of this...…..you just have to stay as isolated as possible, but groceries are the big issue. We're doing OK, but soon we'll be short of potatoes and bread.

Then it becomes a balance of whether those items warrant putting ourselves at risk. Milk is another must have and although we are OK right now, in a weeks time, it will become the issue of the day. 

We are both compromised by weaker chests and asthma. A virus always leaves me with a lingering cough. I have one now...…..so the anxiety and scariness has to continue. 

It's self preservation after all. We have a grocery delivery this afternoon, but until it gets here I have no idea what will be missing.

At least where we live, the infection numbers remain low, because we are in a place which is neither a town, nor a village, it's somewhere in between, but never busy.

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Rhonda Huntress said:

Worried.

I had to have the chat with my son AGAIN that unless he wants his father and me to die he needs to stay at home.

Which then brought up the conversation with my husband about what will we do if the other one dies.  Where are the bills kept, who manages the life insurance,  what we want done with our bodies and is the will current.  That sort of stuff.  Always a load of laughs having that sort of talk :(

Yet still optimistic.  Plan for the worst, hope for the best.

You're doing all you can do, Rhonda.  

My brother, like your son, isn't taking this situation seriously enough. Fortunately (!) he is housebound, but I have given him very strict instructions who he must not let over the threshold (he is my older brother, and a man, I can tell him nothing!!)

The conversation about wills and what not are essential.

What disappoints me is that I have heard a lot this week about the attitude of some people - all younger ones - who think the virus is something that can't harm them much, and is just something they have to catch and get over, as though they will then have a lifetime of immunity.  I personally do not ever even want to catch another common cold. 

 

Edited by Marigold Devin
my English teacher said to use alternative words to get or got, I did so
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15 hours ago, Tari Landar said:

Nothing you said came out poorly, I know exactly what you meant, and mean, and ty. You're right, that's exactly what happens when the world around causes such turmoil and damage in someone. I'm sorry that this is how things have come to be for you as well. I don't think there is anything any individual can do to help someone once things get to that point, but if ever you need a sounding board, even for something small..don't hesitate to msg me. Even if I'm not inworld, or logged on the forums, I can see when I get a message lol. 

I don't like seeing anyone put up so many barriers that the world can't see the person beyond the walls at all. That's exactly what she does, and is doing, except this time, she's adding a few more meters between her and those walls. It's hard to watch, really. She truly is the best human being I have ever met and when she lets the rest of the world see that, it's spectacular, and she does amazing things. Now I sound creepy-ish, I'm sure, lol, but really, it's true. She knows I think this, I tell her all the time. It drives her nuts, she doesn't take compliments well. Right now she's not taking them at all. 

Sigh

It's been a heavy day, but at least she hasn't logged off, or hung the phone up on me, lol (both being part of her MO, and when either happens she isn't likely to be seen or heard from for a while), so there's that. 

No you don't. You sound like the most amazing friend anyone could have. 

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9 hours ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

I have spent most of the day veggie on the couch watching TV.  Started my laundry, but when the washer sang I just said 'The hell with it - I'll run it back through rinse tomorrow' - and I proceeded to put it out of my mind.

Logged in to SL and picked up a few items from some of the weekend sales, but I'm not really in the mood to do anything.

Maybe more TV, maybe a bit of reading, or maybe I'll just go to bed early.

I went to bed at 8.30pm last night. The current COVID-19 climate is getting to us all. The neighbours all were cracking on with their gardening projects at first, seeing the closure of their workplaces, especially on 80% wages, as a good excuse for a bit of a "holiday". After a week of that, I am seeing - and hearing about over garden fences - a general lethargy/apathy coming in, not least because we don't know how long this lock down is going to continue. 

There also seems to be a malevolent wind blowing round today. My neighbourhood is absolutely silent, which I have never experienced this hour of a Sunday afternoon before. I live close to a pub, which is usually quite lively. There is nothingness. And where that used to feel like bliss for me, it feels menacing, oppressive.

Today my head has, for once, been clear enough to think. Something that had been confusing me for a long time has become very clear in my head, and when COVID-19 is over, I shall be able to take the appropriate action on that.  I have been able to spend an hour filling in a complicated form that I had been putting off for a fortnight.

The rest of the day now I can indulge in leisure and pleasure - b4gger all the housework that needs doing. I am never going to be bored enough to put that to the top of my list. Just in case it is the end of the world, I don't want to die with a clean house and dishpan hands!

 

 

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3 hours ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

Well, we got a call on Wednesday that our daughters PCP(which she saw on Monday) tested positive for Covid-19... So.. Yeah... 14 days of complete isolation.. With two teen girls.. Not enough food as we were planning to go shopping that day.. No credit card to buy food from the grocery store and they cant deliver until friday anyway as EVERYONE is ordering online now. Kids cant get their breakfast and lunch from the school now. Cant go to the Food Pantry. I refuse to even remotely chance getting them sick. 

So, how am I feeling? Lost, scared(i have diabetes, makes me immune compromised|), worried as we currently lead the world in active cases and the number just.. keeps.. going.. up. Despair in knowing our fearless leader has no clue and just want his ego stroked for the piss poor job he has done or he will withhold supplies. Lets face it kids. The humans are screwed. Need to call a few family members and see if they can go shopping for us. 

 

ETA forgot to mention.. My daughter had a trip to Virginia planned with her school chorus class. They were going to sing at Bush Gardens.. No refund of $900.. "maybe we will go next year." From the teacher. I believe that as much as i believe that in 15 days Covid-19 will be gone.. 

Have a look for some smaller local suppliers in your area, Drake.  The ones around my locality have been offering a box service. It was a word of mouth thing via Facebook, and a bit of ringing round via our business pages directory. I was able to put some of my more vulnerable neighbours who don't use the internet in touch with. Farmers who have eggs and a range of vegetables have really come good in this area. Some take cash, some cheques, but for people who have porches or driveways or a place to safely put cash or cheques, means no contact has to be made to risk the spread of COVID-19.

Wishing you a happier future. These are troubling times. 

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Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, BelindaN said:

Yeah ^^^ all of this...…..you just have to stay as isolated as possible, but groceries are the big issue. We're doing OK, but soon we'll be short of potatoes and bread.

Then it becomes a balance of whether those items warrant putting ourselves at risk. Milk is another must have and although we are OK right now, in a weeks time, it will become the issue of the day. 

We are both compromised by weaker chests and asthma. A virus always leaves me with a lingering cough. I have one now...…..so the anxiety and scariness has to continue. 

It's self preservation after all. We have a grocery delivery this afternoon, but until it gets here I have no idea what will be missing.

At least where we live, the infection numbers remain low, because we are in a place which is neither a town, nor a village, it's somewhere in between, but never busy.

Silly suggestion, but just in case you hadn't considered this - long life milk, powdered milk. (Even condensed milk in tins can be good for some things - ie if you like porridge, and chilled it's fab on breakfast cereal.) I know neither was actually available on one of my shopping deliveries, but the following one I dropped lucky and got six 1L cartons of UHT milk. 

I've stopped shopping in person altogether. Since Friday when I had to collect essential meds from Boots pharmacy and there was a man in the shop who was trying to buy medicine for what sounded to be a small child who may have got COVID-19 - yipes! The medicine would have been wholly unsuitable, because it contained ibuprofen, but he kept walking within the two metre cordoned off area, potentially infecting the lovely lass working behind the counter. Good job we aren't allowed guns in this country or I'd have got mine out and shot him right there - which is worrying really, because while I have those thoughts, other people are acting on them somewhere where guns are allowed! 

 

Edited by Marigold Devin
her there and everywear - hilf mir und meinem Englisch!
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Malls are empty. grocery stores are full.Also was at my fav one, which i don t visit often(lol), and there was security guard dude and his friend, and they were staring at me(i think) and smiling too much .It was awful and really ucked my mood

 

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my recent complain:My internet provider have a lot of people complaining about low internet connection it s hard to normally play any game. But as usual they pretend it s not all around Russia problem

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2 hours ago, BelindaN said:

Then it becomes a balance of whether those items warrant putting ourselves at risk. Milk is another must have and although we are OK right now, in a weeks time, it will become the issue of the day. 

Stock up on cans of evaporated milk if you can get any, you can dilute them with water and use them as fresh milk. 

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4 minutes ago, Claireschen Hesten said:
3 hours ago, BelindaN said:

Then it becomes a balance of whether those items warrant putting ourselves at risk. Milk is another must have and although we are OK right now, in a weeks time, it will become the issue of the day. 

Stock up on cans of evaporated milk if you can get any, you can dilute them with water and use them as fresh milk.

Definitely check for cans of evaporated milk.  My husband and I, neither one, drink enough milk to actually keep any size carton of fresh milk on hand.  Thus, I keep the cans of evaporated milk in the cupboard for cooking.  When we were at the store this past Friday, the shelves had lots of cans.

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1 hour ago, Claireschen Hesten said:

Stock up on cans of evaporated milk if you can get any, you can dilute them with water and use them as fresh milk. 

 

1 hour ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Definitely check for cans of evaporated milk.  My husband and I, neither one, drink enough milk to actually keep any size carton of fresh milk on hand.  Thus, I keep the cans of evaporated milk in the cupboard for cooking.  When we were at the store this past Friday, the shelves had lots of cans.

There's also powdered milk that comes in boxes and large resealable bags. Great for cooking and ok in coffee as a half n half sub but horrid on cereal. A cereal killer. 

Holay. I do miss him and the rest of the "gang" in NAC. I wonder where everyone went. 💡

 

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