Beth Macbain Posted February 20, 2020 Author Share Posted February 20, 2020 3 minutes ago, Pamela Galli said: I do recall your hater but forget which troll it is. Is it the one currently posting? Yes. She started her anger with me over a meme. A freaking meme. Most of us have been involved in differences of opinion from time to time, some quite heated, and I'm not pretending for a single second that I'm innocent and have never stirred the pot. This has been a good lesson for me to remember that not everyone is sane and mature enough to have a disagreement and move forward without making the other party your mortal enemy to the death. Not everyone likes me. I don't like everyone. That's being human. But stalking them onto other sites and saying the sort of heinous, violent, vile things she's said to me is... who the frick has the time or energy for so much hatred? How broken does a person have to be to get angry with a stranger on the internet and start telling them they hope they get raped, murdered, their throat slit, cancer, kill themselves, etc? That is not a proportional response. It's disturbing to me. I've taken steps to protect myself and put certain measures in place. I think she's just a child with too much time on her hands, but I can't be 100% certain, not in this day and age, can I? 3 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 (edited) I haven't read this forum for a couple of days and have tried to catch up but what the hell happened here? Is this another food thread or what? I can't see the genuine posts for the self-indulgent ones. Sod this. Oh and burning cat memes? No thank you. Edited February 20, 2020 by Garnet Psaltery 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy Evanier Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 Just now, Garnet Psaltery said: I haven't read this forum for a couple of days and have tried to catch up but what the hell happened here? Is this another food thread or what? I can't see the genuine posts for the self-indulgent ones. Sod this. I accidentally started it yesterday saying I felt good because i was naughty and dialed a delivery of a full english breakfast... then the food posts started snowballing a bit after that. I think we clawed it back on track now 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LexxiXhan Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 At a loose end. My 'Shamanic Harmony Chanting' workshop was cancelled this evening, so I bought wine and eggs for breakfast tomorrow (the eggs, not the wine, which is for tonight!). I'm now torn between watching the tv series I'm into at the moment or finding somewhere to dance and chat inworld. It's kinda nice to have such superficial decisions to make ignore. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LexxiXhan Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 7 hours ago, Seicher Rae said: Because of a lot of other craptastic events in my life, I've been teetering on homelessness for way too long. I know that sense of dread and uncertainty only too well. Extra hugs from me xx 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marigold Devin Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 2 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said: Yes. She started her anger with me over a meme. A freaking meme. Most of us have been involved in differences of opinion from time to time, some quite heated, and I'm not pretending for a single second that I'm innocent and have never stirred the pot. This has been a good lesson for me to remember that not everyone is sane and mature enough to have a disagreement and move forward without making the other party your mortal enemy to the death. Not everyone likes me. I don't like everyone. That's being human. But stalking them onto other sites and saying the sort of heinous, violent, vile things she's said to me is... who the frick has the time or energy for so much hatred? How broken does a person have to be to get angry with a stranger on the internet and start telling them they hope they get raped, murdered, their throat slit, cancer, kill themselves, etc? That is not a proportional response. It's disturbing to me. I've taken steps to protect myself and put certain measures in place. I think she's just a child with too much time on her hands, but I can't be 100% certain, not in this day and age, can I? Heck, it could be a child, or it could be a crazy woman-hating man in real life; it could be anyone. And that is just plain frightening. I had an encounter in real life just a couple of nights ago, one would think it was a very pleasant one. It started pleasantly enough. I had walked from my brother's house to my home, 1.6 miles in distance, in the pouring rain and driving wind, and had stopped to check out bus times for the following day, because they've all changed, when a man I had never met before stopped to talk to me at the bus stop, which I really could have done without, because I was so wet and fed up, and I wanted to focus on the timetable, but being me, I was perfectly pleasant with him, answered all his little questions (which were about the bus times), but the vibe he gave off and some of the questions that followed the innocent ones caused alarm bells to ring in my head. Fortunately, a neighbour of mine happened to come along, and break me away from the stranger, and I had company for the rest of the way home. But that stranger could easily be the type to threaten to decapitate people in real life. He may already have two victims sitting in his flat headless. A girl who works in the local shop said some random had threatened to follow her one night, to rape and murder her - and she didn't report it to the police!!!!!!! People - the vibe, the way they behave - even words on a screen, can be so damned harmful, and no one knows, except the one making threats or being intimidating, knows their true intentions. They might just be words, but it's threatening behaviour, unacceptable, and we all know restraining orders don't get taken seriously, this all needs to change. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 8 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said: I haven't read this forum for a couple of days and have tried to catch up but what the hell happened here? Is this another food thread or what? I can't see the genuine posts for the self-indulgent ones. Sod this. We have our occasional derail moments, but sometimes those derails are the only thing in an entire day to provide a smile, so I'm not about to stop myself from sometimes commenting and continuing the derail. The thread always gets back on track. And anyone that ever posts about feeling sad/angry/whatever is always noticed and acknowledged. Nobody is getting ignored because of the slight derails, but sometimes people do actually get a bit of help from them. 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 13 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said: Yes. She started her anger with me over a meme. A freaking meme. Most of us have been involved in differences of opinion from time to time, some quite heated, and I'm not pretending for a single second that I'm innocent and have never stirred the pot. This has been a good lesson for me to remember that not everyone is sane and mature enough to have a disagreement and move forward without making the other party your mortal enemy to the death. Not everyone likes me. I don't like everyone. That's being human. But stalking them onto other sites and saying the sort of heinous, violent, vile things she's said to me is... who the frick has the time or energy for so much hatred? How broken does a person have to be to get angry with a stranger on the internet and start telling them they hope they get raped, murdered, their throat slit, cancer, kill themselves, etc? That is not a proportional response. It's disturbing to me. I've taken steps to protect myself and put certain measures in place. I think she's just a child with too much time on her hands, but I can't be 100% certain, not in this day and age, can I? You definitely do everything possible to ensure your RL safety -- mental and physical. Some people are truly beyond understanding. 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marigold Devin Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 25 minutes ago, Pamela Galli said: So glad you are back Marigold. Wish some other great people who were driven off would come check out the community that members and mods have together created. If someone drops by just to harrass or name call, the mods take care of it. And we say something when we see something. Because this is out community and we have invested a lot in it. Thanks, Pamela. I had to have a break, for health reasons and computer reasons, and silly personal Second Life relationship reasons. I felt absolutely floored when Oskar Linden lost his job, nothing affected me quite so much in my Second Life, and my Second Life partner at the time went a bit weird on me - or I went weird on her (it was probably a joint effort really) - and I was just too poorly to deal with it all, it all seemed pretty trivial while I was ill. I've come back stronger, mellower, but have fragile days still when I will switch everything off. It's good to be human though and to have raw emotions, and awareness of the bad stuff as well as the good stuff (the good seems even better these days though, no doubt because of all the negative experiences of the past). Here's hoping the great moderation continues on these forums. It really is a massive change for the better. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela Galli Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 50 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said: Yes. She started her anger with me over a meme. A freaking meme. Most of us have been involved in differences of opinion from time to time, some quite heated, and I'm not pretending for a single second that I'm innocent and have never stirred the pot. This has been a good lesson for me to remember that not everyone is sane and mature enough to have a disagreement and move forward without making the other party your mortal enemy to the death. Not everyone likes me. I don't like everyone. That's being human. But stalking them onto other sites and saying the sort of heinous, violent, vile things she's said to me is... who the frick has the time or energy for so much hatred? How broken does a person have to be to get angry with a stranger on the internet and start telling them they hope they get raped, murdered, their throat slit, cancer, kill themselves, etc? That is not a proportional response. It's disturbing to me. I've taken steps to protect myself and put certain measures in place. I think she's just a child with too much time on her hands, but I can't be 100% certain, not in this day and age, can I? Nope you can’t. I will never get how some people get the idea they were put on earth to make things more difficult than they already are. 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pamela Galli Posted February 20, 2020 Share Posted February 20, 2020 41 minutes ago, Marigold Devin said: Heck, it could be a child, or it could be a crazy woman-hating man in real life; it could be anyone. And that is just plain frightening. I had an encounter in real life just a couple of nights ago, one would think it was a very pleasant one. It started pleasantly enough. I had walked from my brother's house to my home, 1.6 miles in distance, in the pouring rain and driving wind, and had stopped to check out bus times for the following day, because they've all changed, when a man I had never met before stopped to talk to me at the bus stop, which I really could have done without, because I was so wet and fed up, and I wanted to focus on the timetable, but being me, I was perfectly pleasant with him, answered all his little questions (which were about the bus times), but the vibe he gave off and some of the questions that followed the innocent ones caused alarm bells to ring in my head. Fortunately, a neighbour of mine happened to come along, and break me away from the stranger, and I had company for the rest of the way home. But that stranger could easily be the type to threaten to decapitate people in real life. He may already have two victims sitting in his flat headless. A girl who works in the local shop said some random had threatened to follow her one night, to rape and murder her - and she didn't report it to the police!!!!!!! People - the vibe, the way they behave - even words on a screen, can be so damned harmful, and no one knows, except the one making threats or being intimidating, knows their true intentions. They might just be words, but it's threatening behaviour, unacceptable, and we all know restraining orders don't get taken seriously, this all needs to change. Gavin de Becker says trust your instincts because you are receiving danger signals from little things you are subconsciously noticing. Women tend to not want to be rude to anyone so we try to ignore our unease. But don’t. Be rude if you need to. . 6 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 (edited) 8 hours ago, LittleMe Jewell said: We have our occasional derail moments, but sometimes those derails are the only thing in an entire day to provide a smile, so I'm not about to stop myself from sometimes commenting and continuing the derail. The thread always gets back on track. And anyone that ever posts about feeling sad/angry/whatever is always noticed and acknowledged. Nobody is getting ignored because of the slight derails, but sometimes people do actually get a bit of help from them. Well, that told me, I suppose. I can't cope with reading all the extra posts but if everybody else can, then fine; it's not my thread. I'll look for something quieter and gentler. Edited February 21, 2020 by Garnet Psaltery 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kali Wylder Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 8 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: I haven't read this forum for a couple of days and have tried to catch up but what the hell happened here? oops! All I can say is derails happen. welcome back! ❤ 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kali Wylder Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 47 minutes ago, Garnet Psaltery said: Well, that told me, I suppose. I can't cope with reading all the extra posts but if everybody else can, then fine; it's not my thread. I'll look for something quieter and gentler. Please don't go Garnet. ❤ 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garnet Psaltery Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 4 minutes ago, kali Wylder said: Please don't go Garnet. ❤ I'm still in the forum, just not here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marigold Devin Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 4 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: Well, that told me, I suppose. I can't cope with reading all the extra posts but if everybody else can, then fine; it's not my thread. I'll look for something quieter and gentler. I must admit, I could have done without the cat burning thing, but I'm always up for a drool over food. The thread did get back on track. Please tell us how you are feeling today. Be careful with the pain killers for your tooth, but I hope that isn't troubling you too much and you are able to find some good dentist to fix it for you soonest. You're bound to be feeling totally rubbish with that going on. I have very sore and cracked heels, through walking in ill-fitting hostile shoes, and know I have a cold coming on, so I feel a bit grumpy and out of sorts this morning. My real life chap is miles away, and I miss him like crazy, which is rather out of character for me, because I don't get so close really to anyone. I've roleplayed it in Second Life, but real life relationships have always felt like a chore until this one. That's not a really good explanation of how I am actually feeling. The cold is making me feel I have cotton wool in my head. But certainly compared to last year and previous years with the health issues, I feel like a million dollars. And the sun has come out ! 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy Evanier Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 3 hours ago, Garnet Psaltery said: I'm still in the forum, just not here. Please stay. I feel bad it was my post that started all the food stuff. It certainly wasn't meant to do that. I honestly had a comfort eating moment. I also noticed it drew in people who don't normally post in this thread. Time will tell if that was a good thing and they will feel they can share the important stuff in the true essence of the thread. Mood today: exhausted after a night of over thinking stuff out of my control. I did not sleep well. My youngest is in Austria for a ski trip with the school. For the fiirst 4 days the school blog was full of lots of videos and pictures of the kids and their attempts at skiing and tubing. Last day and a half.. nothing. That also coincides with a Whatsapp message sitting there on my phone to my son with 2 grey ticks (evil thing) So of course the whole hotel is covered in an avalanche or they are all quarantined with coronavirus or alien invasion. Its not like I haven't been through the separation for school trips, cubs, scouts, uni etc etc with all 3 of my boys before. I don't know what it is and I am trying so hard to tell myself its not a sixth sense thing. *back to refreshing the blog page for new pictures* 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bitsy Buccaneer Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 13 hours ago, Beth Macbain said: Yes. She started her anger with me over a meme. A freaking meme. Is she really angry with you or is she just pretending to be as a pretense to get you upset and paying attention to her? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth Macbain Posted February 21, 2020 Author Share Posted February 21, 2020 5 hours ago, Bitsy Buccaneer said: Is she really angry with you or is she just pretending to be as a pretense to get you upset and paying attention to her? I'm not sure it really matters. She seems to be angry with literally every single person in the world but for the moment I'm her most hated. If it was regular run-of-the-mill trolling, I'd ignore it. When it goes so far as to include death threats, stalking me on other platforms, etc., I'm not going to ignore it. I'm going to take the steps I need to take to keep myself safe, and I'm not going to hide away and not call out the atrocious behavior because, much like any abuser, I think they should have a big bright spotlight on them so the world knows what they are and others can take steps to avoid them. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beth Macbain Posted February 21, 2020 Author Share Posted February 21, 2020 Today seems to be one of those days when there are a lot of people here on the forums that are feeling particularly susceptible to insult. Part of the ebb and flow of things, I believe. Is there a full moon or anything? I'm not pointing fingers at anyone because I'm just feeling just as edgy as anyone and liable to read insult into things that aren't necessarily intended to be insults. Does anyone else feel that, or is it just me? I'm old (as my hater likes to point out... lol) and going through menopause so I'm never entirely sure if what I'm feeling is real or just my hormones! 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashlyn Voir Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 Just now, Beth Macbain said: Today seems to be one of those days when there are a lot of people here on the forums that are feeling particularly susceptible to insult. Part of the ebb and flow of things, I believe. Is there a full moon or anything? I'm not pointing fingers at anyone because I'm just feeling just as edgy as anyone and liable to read insult into things that aren't necessarily intended to be insults. Does anyone else feel that, or is it just me? I'm old (as my hater likes to point out... lol) and going through menopause so I'm never entirely sure if what I'm feeling is real or just my hormones! Group hug! ❤❤❤ 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bitsy Buccaneer Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 1 minute ago, Beth Macbain said: I'm not sure it really matters. She seems to be angry with literally every single person in the world but for the moment I'm her most hated. If it was regular run-of-the-mill trolling, I'd ignore it. When it goes so far as to include death threats, stalking me on other platforms, etc., I'm not going to ignore it. I'm going to take the steps I need to take to keep myself safe, and I'm not going to hide away and not call out the atrocious behavior because, much like any abuser, I think they should have a big bright spotlight on them so the world knows what they are and others can take steps to avoid them. My apologies for not being explicitly clear in why I said what I did. I edited it a few times trying to find the right words and right way to put it and failed. Again, my apologies. I'm in no way suggesting you ignore it or allow her to invade any aspect of your life. Absolutely protect yourself and do what you need to towards that. I phrased it as a question because I don't know the history between you and I didn't want to make assumptions about it. I think I know who you're talking about though, and her patterns are obvious. I had hoped that by offering some perspective from a distance it might help you to gain emotional distance from it as well. Please be careful about letting her play you emotionally. Please take care of yourself that way as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marigold Devin Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 1 minute ago, Beth Macbain said: Today seems to be one of those days when there are a lot of people here on the forums that are feeling particularly susceptible to insult. Part of the ebb and flow of things, I believe. Is there a full moon or anything? I'm not pointing fingers at anyone because I'm just feeling just as edgy as anyone and liable to read insult into things that aren't necessarily intended to be insults. Does anyone else feel that, or is it just me? I'm old (as my hater likes to point out... lol) and going through menopause so I'm never entirely sure if what I'm feeling is real or just my hormones! It's not just you that's seeing this. And it's only partly down to menopause - and menopause is an absolute bear to have to deal with, but when you get through to the other side of that, you will have such clarity. It really is like starting life all over again. It is amazing to be post-menopause. Liberating (apart from having to do all the extra hair removal!!!) We really don't know what's going on behind the avatars. There are people with physical pain and ailments, from toothache to MS and beyond, and some with mental health issues (we all have those to some degree), and some days are just 'fuggy' - grim, boggy, days with no sunshine. Or a ridiculously high gas bill has just come in for someone. Discussions do sometimes tend to get personal, and they should never do. They should just be about opinions, not insults. Maybe it is the way the planets are lined up. Uranus. My anus !! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LittleMe Jewell Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 29 minutes ago, Beth Macbain said: Today seems to be one of those days when there are a lot of people here on the forums that are feeling particularly susceptible to insult. Part of the ebb and flow of things, I believe. Is there a full moon or anything? I'm not pointing fingers at anyone because I'm just feeling just as edgy as anyone and liable to read insult into things that aren't necessarily intended to be insults. Does anyone else feel that, or is it just me? I'm old (as my hater likes to point out... lol) and going through menopause so I'm never entirely sure if what I'm feeling is real or just my hormones! Sunday is the New Moon - so maybe..... I sometimes fall into those modes of seeing everything or almost everything as some sort of jab. When I notice that I'm seeing it everywhere, I try to walk away for a while and occupy my mind with something else. Sometimes is works and sometimes it doesn't. There have been times where I've been in that ultra sensitive mode for days on end. It sucks, but I haven't yet found a sure-fire fix. I'm finally on the other side of menopause and all this crap still gets blamed on my hormones - or lack thereof. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Selene Gregoire Posted February 21, 2020 Share Posted February 21, 2020 11 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said: I'm finally on the other side of menopause and all this crap still gets blamed on my hormones - or lack thereof. Nah. It's just your mental age is finally starting to catch up to your physical age. At 60, I don't "feel 60". I don't feel any older than I did at 30. Sure there were those occasions when I felt like I was 90 when I was 30. That was my own fault. The price you pay to party while young. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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