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4 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

Well that could be, but what if the posts in that instance are dead serious?  It's a bit insulting for someone to judge another as not serious or as basically 'invalid' in their thoughts when the person making the post is earnest.

It might be insulting, that's true and I can see that, but it might also be insulting to insinuate they're trying to affect you negatively when you don't actually know too, couldn't it? Maybe they don't hold grudges, maybe they really thought you were trying to be funny, maybe they hit the wrong smiley (been there, done that, got my hand verbally slapped twice for it..not cool) any number of things could be true.

That's a huge part of why I don't use reactions and I post way less. People make weird assumptions and quite often, they're totally wrong. 

I laugh about a lot of things, most things really, people make fun of me for using lol a lot, thinking I'm not actually laughing, but trust me, if I was verbally speaking to you, you'd hear me laughing a LOT. I laugh about everything because...why the hell not. I mean, I TRY not to laugh at serious stuff, but my imagination runs wild and frankly I don't wanna try and control it. I let her be, she lets me be, that's how we roll., yes my imagination is its own entity..deal with it 😛 

Laughter keeps me sane in a world that is quickly going dark, and I will be damned if I let anyone, anywhere, stop that laughter. It's all I've got, and it's mine, not for the taking by anyone. Whether people misinterpret my laughter or not, is on them, I don't have to prove it's genuine. You either believe it is, or you don't. I think most people don't bother to let it affect them, but those that do..eh..not my problem. If it were me, and it has been, and I were wondering about a reaction to something, I'd ask, I wouldn't assume, no matter *who it was. I just don't usually question responses, and I take them at face value. If someone laughs at my post I choose to believe they're laughing and don't question their motives (and frankly, why would I care of their motives, that seems like such a silly thing to worry about to me..but that only applies to me).

 

*ETA: an example...... Daughter, 6 years old manages to somehow hurt herself, really badly(without getting too graphic she hurt her foot from the arch over heel ot near her achilles...it was bad, ER NOW bad) but because she doesn't have proper pain receptors, and those she does are cross wired, it didn't hurt. She walked around the house for a good five minutes before I knew, and I only knew because her little brother (2 and non verbal at the time) was screaming at me to try and tell on her "mess" she was making.  Cue me walking into the hall to go find her, her walking out of her room and me seeing nothing short of a horror movie scene...I burst out in laughter, scoop her up, grab  the baby, yell for my oldest to grab a towel, ..blah blah.. get to the ER with me still laughing my ass off. Everyone looking at me like I'm a fool, or even crying-which I wasn't, I knew she would be fine-I was worried, yes, I'm a mom it's what we do. I was genuinely laughing because the situation at hand, while serious, was hilarious to me. My house looked like a horror movie, my 2 year old non verbal child just spoke a full sentence, her older sister didn't bother telling me what their bedroom looked like, I'm trying to wrangle three children and a child who doesn't understand if she keeps moving she could...(you get the picture, it's gruesome to type), it was the icing on the cake for a kid that literally spent her first five years living in a children's hospital on and off and only just that year had STOPPED needing to do so...and then this.  It was FUNNY and remains so to this day.

I got called psycho in the ER for laughing. I STILL get called psycho and other things for laughing. If only people knew.... 

People just don't get my humor.  If I didn't laugh, I would've lost my ***** that day. I choose not to lose my *****, I choose to find humor in as many places as I can, sometimes even when the other party doesn't intend for me to find humor. I even do it when people intentionally insult me (sort of my way of hitting back sometimes, whether they know it or not).  Don't judge my laughing as anything other than laughing...you may not like it, but my laughter is always genuine laughter.  I find absurdities absolutely hilarious and I will *always do so :D 

Edited by Tari Landar
forgot words, and stuff
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33 minutes ago, Tari Landar said:

It might be insulting, that's true and I can see that, but it might also be insulting to insinuate they're trying to affect you negatively when you don't actually know too, couldn't it?

People just don't get my humor.  If I didn't laugh, I would've lost my ***** that day. I choose not to lose my *****, I choose to find humor in as many places as I can, sometimes even when the other party doesn't intend for me to find humor. 

Tari, I appreciate you taking the time in an attempt to help me see something I might not be seeing clearly. However, in this particular case I'm certain it was part of a pattern of harassment I experienced on this thread. I'd bet my life on it.

I totally understand your humor though, and sometimes cope the same way. Many don't understand it for sure. Sometimes so many things go wrong at once I just start laughing. It's a good way to cope really, onlookers be damned! lol

Edited by Luna Bliss
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9 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Tari, I appreciate you taking the time in an attempt to help me see something I might not be seeing clearly. However, in this particular case I'm certain it was part of a pattern of harassment I experienced on this thread. I'd bet my life on it.

I totally understand your humor though, and sometimes cope the same way. Many don't understand it for sure. Sometimes so many things go wrong at once I just start laughing. It's a good way to cope really, onlookers be damned! lol

1-You really shouldn't bet your life on uncertainties, unless absolutely necessary. This isn't a soapbox on which such would ever be necessary (and nothing anyone can say will convince me it is, lol-yes an actual laugh). But, even if that is the case, why not take the high road and not be bothered by it, or at least not let your bother show, especially if you perceive it as intentional, wherein the other party would have gotten exactly what they wanted out of you? Why let it bother you so much so that you create an entire conversation surrounded people and scornful laughs. It didn't really accomplish much, except prove that perhaps you can't always(general you) tell the intentions of others and pretending to do so, may just be the wrong choice, because it's possible you're wrong. You can't know for certain, that's the bottom line here and without certainty, it seems, to me (and again, this is just me) more than absurd to let it eat away at you to the point you'd call it harassment. We've had discussions here before about harassment, and I've seen your opinion on it, we've discussed it, at great length, in the past. We do NOT agree, whatsoever, on what constitutes harassment (you once told me my disagreement with someone on something was me harassing them, and it wasn't, even the other person eventually told you that but you didn't let up, lol), so, I doubt anyone wants to get back into that whole deal lol. I don't find people laughing at your, or anyone's, posts to be harassment. I never will. Not when it is so easily ignored and without asking the respondent their motives. I know all too well what it's like to have people assume motives and be 100% wrong. It's a stupid, imho, thing to do, and just causes rifts where they need not exist. I don't hold any ill will towards you after that whole shpeal, lol, or the other person, plus that was ages ago.  But I found it as laughable then, as I do today. :) I found humor in something that was getting real ugly, real quick (and was a lot uglier before most of it was removed). 

2-It's not just a coping mechanism, though I can see why you might think that, and sometimes it's a dual purpose laugh and serves as that too. Things genuinely are funny to me that might not seem funny to others. Sometimes I have to intentionally look for the humor, but mostly, it just jumps out at me immediately. I laugh at a LOT of weird things. My doctor used to tell me when I was little if I didn't stop laughing at everything someone would mistake me for a sociopath one day. That hasn't quite happened, but I've been accused of a lot of nasty *****, even by you, because of my laughter. Sometimes, people really are way off base. Even people that are, for whatever reason, angry with you, can laugh at you and genuinely be laughing about something you said without it being harassment. 

(and  am REALLY hoping you don't take any of that as offensive. I mean it when I say I don't hold a grudge or any ill will over anything on these forums, lol, and there is no intent to be offensive in anything I've said...there was just a time when you called something i did harassment too, and it wasn't, not even remotely)

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6 hours ago, Love Zhaoying said:

would say a wtf reaction is not too many dimensions away from scorn.

looking it up so i do not get misunderstood  the word scorn from the dictionary  as follows

 
noun: scorn
  1. the feeling or belief that someone or something is worthless or despicable; contempt
    i really do not believe  that anyone thinks that definition above about anyone ,,,,
     
     i only use the laughing face thinggy  for funny
    and the confused for seriously i do not understand it ,,,, 
     
    please can everyone just  take a few seconds to relax   and have some candy and icecream  handing it out ,,,
     
    ,  and think about how much we care and love each other ,,,,
     
    life is to short to make each other feel bad ,,,,,
     
    misunderstandings happen ,,,,
     
    the language of different styles of communication ,
     
     
       i am  getting upset that things are going to the not ok feelings   hugging everyone   tears ,,, hugging ,,,, you are all too precious  at the end of the day you all want the same to be heard , understood , respected , and loved ,,, hugging all and tears in eyes ,,,,
     
    and the other ,,, not even going to type it lest i get in trouble  the w --  means i am confused and how or its unususal or frighting or any of thoses emotions ,,, i do not or know anyone who used that as a scorn   
     ,,, and really not many people scorn 
    ,,,, only in movies like mean girls ,,,, 
     
     the emocons i know not spelling it right ,,, since there are only a few to select  not really fair to anyone they neede to have more  to be exact  and the limited one they have makes  to much  abstract  area  for people to try to interpet or asume  and in the forums like texting ,,, a lot of unclariety ,,, so  maybe if one choses one of those  do a ps with the comment like ,,, i am belly laughing or i thinks its cute   and if you do not agree just a lets agree to disagree 
     and truthfully
      you cant have a good sandwich without both sides of the bread  just make sure the sandwich is made with love
Edited by roseelvira
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1 hour ago, Tari Landar said:

People just don't get my humor.

Tari, you're not one of the people who often laughs at those they're disagreeing with. There are a few who do, and the negative tone of the response is clear. A couple in particular will go through and laugh at pretty much everything those they're disagreeing have said, even when the subject's changed.

What you do is very different. I certainly can see the difference and I'd wager most of the regulars do as well. You don't fall into that pattern of laughing at someone you're locking horns with over several pages of a thread.

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14 minutes ago, roseelvira said:

looking it up so i do not get misunderstood  the word scorn from the dictionary  as follows

 
noun: scorn
  1. the feeling or belief that someone or something is worthless or despicable; contempt
    i really do not believe  that anyone thinks that definition above about anyone ,,,,
     i only use the laughing face thinggy  for funny and the confused for seriously i do not understand it ,,,, 
     
    please can everyone just  take a few  and have some candy and icecream  handing it out ,,,,  and think about how much we care and love each other ,,,, life is to short to make each other feel bad ,,,,, misunderstandings happen ,,,, the language of different styles of communication ,
       getting upset that things are going to the sad side  
     
    and the other ,,, not even going to type it lest i get in trouble   means i am confused and how or its unususal or frighting or any of thoses emotions ,,, i do not or know anyone who used that as a scorn ,,, and really not many people scorn  ,,,, only in movies like mean girls ,,,, 
     
     the emocons i know not spelling it right ,,, lease to much for people to try to interpet or asume  and in the forums like texting ,,, a lot of unclariety ,,, so  maybe if one choses one of those  do a ps with the comment like ,,, i am belly laughing or i thinks its cute   and if you do not agree just a lets agree to disagree   you cant have a good sandwitch without both sides of the bread  just make sure the sandwitch is made with love

Sorry, I use dark mode theme and cannot read this, as it is displayed as black text on black background.

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6 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Sorry, I use dark mode theme and cannot read this, as it is displayed as black text on black background.

Focus on the “contempt” definition. If someone acts in a manner that is really bad, their behavior is worthy of contempt. Don’t focus on the part of the definition that says “scorn” “for the person”.

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2 hours ago, Madelaine McMasters said:

Were there a WTF button, I'd only click it on a post in which the poster was clearly offering up an example to invite it and shared the opinion, as Rhonda did earlier with that adorable video of Clover. Many of you have been targets of my "What the hell is wrong with you?" style comments, and I love it when you shoot back at me, all in good fun. I sometimes take risks by setting fire to a newbie, but I also watch for signs of a misfire so I can rectify the misunderstanding.

There is a huge difference between laughing at someone and laughing with them. I choose the latter.
There's a huge difference between sarcasm and satire. I choose the latter.
Ideas are fair game. People? Rarely so. I am wary of people who, in their profiles, list sarcasm as an interest.

As a longtime member of the forums, I want this to remain a friendly, inviting place. I try to do my part to make it so.

 

...hugs you all up and sets you on fire

We love you, too! grouphug.gif.8b3fdd38ee0c530c6fea3ce359d5b11a.gifhearts.gif.ebe67f7622a56ea7721496258a87bacf.gif

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31 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Sorry, I use dark mode theme and cannot read this, as it is displayed as black text on black background.

i guess it is the bad weather here i keep getting message need to wait so many minutes between posts ,,, and the copy thinggy is not working correctly ,,,, very sorry  the post is messy and it wont let me edit it ,,,,, making a sad face because it is sad that it is messy

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1 minute ago, roseelvira said:

i guess it is the bad weather here i keep getting message need to wait so many minutes between posts ,,, and the copy thinggy is not working correctly ,,,, very sorry  the post is messy and it wont let me edit it ,,,,, making a sad face because it is sad that it is messy

It’s ok hugs, I got the gist of your post. To me, “scorn” isn’t about the person, but their behavior.

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