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Not sure if this is the right place or not.

Anyway, my question is... what are peoples opinions on platonic cuddling with friends (same gender or not) when you're in a relationship?

For me, I personally don't care. It's just a form of affection, and realistically, it's just pixels.

However, I've found that a lot of people on here really don't like it if their partner cuddles (especially with the gender they're attracted to, even if they're not attracted to the person they're cuddling)

I'm someone that can't handle much physical contact in my real life due to various reasons, so I love to cuddle in SL.

I was just wondering if anyone could give me any insight into this?


Thank you!

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Cuddling is fine...if you're in a relationship...if you're cuddling with the person you're in a relationship with.

Cuddle that floozy next door, and it's the frying pan upside your head!

 

Seriously...cuddling with people you aren't close to can be SO easily misconstrued, especially since a lot of cuddle poses are really closer to foreplay than to platonic cuddling.  Limit it to hugs.

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It all depends on who she's cuddling.  If it's a friend of ours I would only think that is it sweet.  I am also well aware that I am not typical nor traditional. 

If you are in a relationship and want to cuddle with other people the ONLY opinion that matters belongs to the other person in your relationship.

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21 minutes ago, Rhonda Huntress said:

If you are in a relationship and want to cuddle with other people the ONLY opinion that matters belongs to the other person in your relationship.

^^ This - most definitely this.

Nobody's opinion matters except the people involved - primarily the ones in a relationship.

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Yeah, I definitely agree that the opinion of the people in the relationship that matters. It's just a mindset that I struggle to understand, so I'm trying to.

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21 hours ago, MomoKaeledyr said:

Not sure if this is the right place or not.

Anyway, my question is... what are peoples opinions on platonic cuddling with friends (same gender or not) when you're in a relationship?

For me, I personally don't care. It's just a form of affection, and realistically, it's just pixels.

However, I've found that a lot of people on here really don't like it if their partner cuddles (especially with the gender they're attracted to, even if they're not attracted to the person they're cuddling)

I'm someone that can't handle much physical contact in my real life due to various reasons, so I love to cuddle in SL.

I was just wondering if anyone could give me any insight into this?


Thank you!

One serious question: Would you do this in real life?

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34 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

A polyamorous person would..

I did not see where the OP mentioned that they are polyamorous. Though it was a general question to all readers and you have not answered it, have you? No worries, it's rhetorical for inner consideration to know thyself, the answer to which is not necessarily for public broadcasting. :)

Edited by Alyona Su
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1 hour ago, Alyona Su said:

One serious question: Would you do this in real life?

If I didn't have the issues I have with physical touch in real life, then yes. My mindset would be the same. I am also polyamorous IRL.   Like I said, I accept that people dont' like it and have their boundries, it's just I really don't understand why platonic cuddling with friends is an issue and it's something I'm trying to understand.

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22 minutes ago, Alyona Su said:

Though it was a general question to all readers and you have not answered it, have you?

Hmm. Ok, then. If I were in a relationship where it were ok for both me and my partner to cuddle with others, I would. And it would be ok with me, because cuddling is innocent. Is that a better answer?

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45 minutes ago, MomoKaeledyr said:

If I didn't have the issues I have with physical touch in real life, then yes. My mindset would be the same. I am also polyamorous IRL.   Like I said, I accept that people dont' like it and have their boundries, it's just I really don't understand why platonic cuddling with friends is an issue and it's something I'm trying to understand.

Many people cannot wrap their head around the idea of polyamorous, either. I believe it begins with a cultural thing and our world-views grow from there. It has to do with the way that, for centuries, (in the western world) society has determined that monogamy is the God-given law; the dictatorships of many religions (no offense intended toward anyone who considers themselves religious, it is what it is).

I, for one, will not "attach" myself to one specific other in SL (BF/GF, Marriage, etc.) simply for the propensity of miscommunication breeding drama, etc. So I do platonic-cuddles whenever I can, sometimes maybe even more, but only if it's someone I've gotten to know a bit first (!) - I get where you're coming from. But when someone makes that *pledge* to be loyal and monogamous, then even a platonic cuddle is dead wrong in the eyes of the one who was pledged, because "ownership"; MINE! Only MINE, and I dun-wanna-share because MINE!. It's presumed there is a disloyalty in the heart and mind as the long-term embracement, e.g. "cuddle", can be a very sensual, sometimes erotic activity to some degree. And where eroticism is concerned, it is at the heart of that monogamous pledge.

Edited by Alyona Su

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1 hour ago, MomoKaeledyr said:

If I didn't have the issues I have with physical touch in real life, then yes. My mindset would be the same. I am also polyamorous IRL.   Like I said, I accept that people dont' like it and have their boundries, it's just I really don't understand why platonic cuddling with friends is an issue and it's something I'm trying to understand.

You are sending mixed signals. People can't deal with mixed signals.

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I see no issue with platonic cuddling/hugging so long as everyone consents. Especially amongst friends. But I'm a super affectionate person so. -shrug-

 

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I usually tend not to have problems as long as my partner is honest with me about their feelings, however I can still see how some may be uncomfortable with this. An SL experience can quickly become intimate, and cuddling can be seen as very intimate to some, while not to others. 

Oh well! 🙂

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45 minutes ago, MomoKaeledyr said:

How am I giving mixed signals?

You don't see the conflict between 

 

3 hours ago, MomoKaeledyr said:

If I didn't have the issues I have with physical touch in real life

and

On 9/8/2019 at 8:17 AM, MomoKaeledyr said:

I love to cuddle in SL.

?

Saying one thing (about RL) and doing the opposite (in SL) is sending a mixed signal.

We aren't always aware we are sending mixed signals and we don't always realize that what we say and what we do send mixed signals. So, no, I'm not saying you are at fault. I'm simply saying that when your words don't really match your actions, people don't know how to deal with that because the signals they are getting don't match.

I do understand that you are not able to cuddle in RL, yet crave human contact. While the boats we are in may not have the same name, they're still boats, so I know where you are coming from on not being able to cuddle in RL so you cuddle in SL because you can. My RL other half is not a cuddler and I love to cuddle. So I crave that human contact, too.

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4 minutes ago, Selene Gregoire said:

...My RL other half is not a cuddler and I love to cuddle. So I crave that human contact, too.

What happens when the lamb cuddles with the lion...

pexels-photo-145988.jpeg?h=350&auto=comp

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5 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said:

What happens when the lamb cuddles with the lion...

I went looking for an image to counter yours and found this...
large.jpg

Unfortunately, my sense of humor prevails over my oppositionality, so I offer this instead...
lwfw.jpg

Were I the lion, I'd eat the kid first.

Edited by Madelaine McMasters
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2 minutes ago, Madelaine McMasters said:

Unfortunately, my sense of humor prevails over my oppositionality, so I offer this instead...
lwfw.jpg

Were I the lion, I'd eat the kid first.

Now, if that lamb were a baby goat, your comment would have REALLY been confusing!

Edited by Lindal Kidd

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5 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said:

What happens when the lamb cuddles with the lion...

pexels-photo-145988.jpeg?h=350&auto=comp

No, that's Love, not me and mine. We're wolves. He's alpha, I'm omega.  I think you can figure out who the peacekeeper is. ;)

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