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Orwar

Looking for friends - with online status hidden!

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   No, no, I'm not looking for friends with their online status hidden - this might end up a bit of a rant, but I do have a point that I'd like to make. I frequently do look up the profiles of people who post in the Make Friends forum to see if they appear interesting and, most importantly, whether they're online. Sometimes, when a person appears interesting to me but appear offline, I'll write them a little note card to introduce myself and let them know I saw their post and decided to contact them - and I drop it at them, and they receive the item just fine; they're online!

   I might as well have put this in the pet peeve thread, I suppose, but I also figured it might be relevant for people who are indeed on the look-out for friends; I highly suspect that some people may well skip you over if they look you up and are led to believe that you're not online. They might check in again later, and still thinking you're offline assume that you just don't share their online hours and pass you (at least, I do!). Whether you post in these forums, or if you sign up at some in-world venue for finding friends or partners, your hidden online status might just be what causes you to miss out on potential friends!

   I get that people, for different reasons, may want to hide their online status - but if you just tick that box because "privacy", well, you may well be getting more of it than you asked for. And if you do post here to try finding some friends, at least toggle it off temporarily for a few days? </rant>

   I'm curious though, is it just me or does seeing the red 'offline' notice in a profile turn you off from trying to reach out to that person in that moment?

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10 minutes ago, Orwar said:

   No, no, I'm not looking for friends with their online status hidden - this might end up a bit of a rant, but I do have a point that I'd like to make. I frequently do look up the profiles of people who post in the Make Friends forum to see if they appear interesting and, most importantly, whether they're online. Sometimes, when a person appears interesting to me but appear offline, I'll write them a little note card to introduce myself and let them know I saw their post and decided to contact them - and I drop it at them, and they receive the item just fine; they're online!

   I might as well have put this in the pet peeve thread, I suppose, but I also figured it might be relevant for people who are indeed on the look-out for friends; I highly suspect that some people may well skip you over if they look you up and are led to believe that you're not online. They might check in again later, and still thinking you're offline assume that you just don't share their online hours and pass you (at least, I do!). Whether you post in these forums, or if you sign up at some in-world venue for finding friends or partners, your hidden online status might just be what causes you to miss out on potential friends!

   I get that people, for different reasons, may want to hide their online status - but if you just tick that box because "privacy", well, you may well be getting more of it than you asked for. And if you do post here to try finding some friends, at least toggle it off temporarily for a few days? </rant>

   I'm curious though, is it just me or does seeing the red 'offline' notice in a profile turn you off from trying to reach out to that person in that moment?

It doesn't bother me at all, IF the profile is interesting, I'll drop them a line or a notecard and introduce myself, if it goes through great, if not, I wait and eventually they get back to me or they don't, it's really no skin off my nose lol. I have mine set for offline simply because I hate, Hate, HATE getting random IM's from mostly jerks that I have no clue who they are proposing me, it's counterproductive. I figure if someone is REALLY interested in getting to know me they will reach out regardless of my on/offline status. 

A side note: I NEVER received anything from you....*goes and pouts in a corner* j/k!

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1 minute ago, anniepany said:

I have mine set for offline

1 minute ago, anniepany said:

A side note: I NEVER received anything from you....

   Mmhm, I think we just discovered why that is!

 

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Just now, Orwar said:

   Mmhm, I think we just discovered why that is!

 

*sticks my tongue out* Mr. Smarty Pants!

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image.png.f777c80334b3d494239a33b015858e1e.png

   ... ... See, that's a penny I may never see again!

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I would assume someone really is offline. But it's really difficult playing online hide and seek so I just send a notecard.

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I'm pretty sure my status is set to Offline, but then I've also never come to the forums (or elsewhere) asking for friends.  I'm more of the loner type anyway.

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On 7/19/2019 at 3:10 PM, Orwar said:

   No, no, I'm not looking for friends with their online status hidden - this might end up a bit of a rant, but I do have a point that I'd like to make. I frequently do look up the profiles of people who post in the Make Friends forum to see if they appear interesting and, most importantly, whether they're online. Sometimes, when a person appears interesting to me but appear offline, I'll write them a little note card to introduce myself and let them know I saw their post and decided to contact them - and I drop it at them, and they receive the item just fine; they're online!

   I might as well have put this in the pet peeve thread, I suppose, but I also figured it might be relevant for people who are indeed on the look-out for friends; I highly suspect that some people may well skip you over if they look you up and are led to believe that you're not online. They might check in again later, and still thinking you're offline assume that you just don't share their online hours and pass you (at least, I do!). Whether you post in these forums, or if you sign up at some in-world venue for finding friends or partners, your hidden online status might just be what causes you to miss out on potential friends!

   I get that people, for different reasons, may want to hide their online status - but if you just tick that box because "privacy", well, you may well be getting more of it than you asked for. And if you do post here to try finding some friends, at least toggle it off temporarily for a few days? </rant>

   I'm curious though, is it just me or does seeing the red 'offline' notice in a profile turn you off from trying to reach out to that person in that moment?

Some people tend to be stalker-ish. And if you've ever been stalked (RL or online) you tend to do what you have to do so that your enjoyment of life doesn't have to end.

Another reason I appear offline is some guys think their idea of a fun prank isn't the same as mine so it cuts down on the number of strange men dropping into my skybox.

I'm also afk a good bit and can be afk for some time, without warning.

I build so if you don't happen to catch me before I plop something down to work on I'm not usually going to drop what I'm doing to socialize. I prefer not to have my concentration broken.

So my question is, what is wrong with leaving someone an offline if they really are offline? And if they aren't, they will get the message. Or, as you say, just drop a notecard on them. They will either answer or they won't. If they don't, move on. There are 30-50k other people in world at pretty much any given time.

 

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The online status indicators in profiles and such have been known to glitch out on occasion and show someone as offline even when they are not.

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11 minutes ago, Solar Legion said:

The online status indicators in profiles and such have been known to glitch out on occasion and show someone as offline even when they are not.

I can confirm that - I usually cannot see my own online alts ... and I am pretty sure I am not hiding my online status from myself...

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18 minutes ago, Fionalein said:

I can confirm that - I usually cannot see my own online alts ... and I am pretty sure I am not hiding my online status from myself...

Amusingly these glitches are part of why one cannot hide one's status from a script or from groups one is a part of: The glitch is known and these systems are known workarounds - outside of sending a simple IM.

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I don't think I've ever used the offline status in the entire almost 12 (? I think) years I've been in SL. If I truly don't want to be bothered, I log in as one of my alts.

But, I am guilty of missing a lot of IM's because I'm frequently immersed in working on my land, shopping or taking photos and I'm just not paying attention to them at all. I think my profile even says something like "semi-friendly". I'm actually quite friendly, I should probably change it to semi-social.

Also, I go AFK a LOT. I have home stuff I'm doing sometimes in between like cooking dinner, or wrangling cats. Sometimes I walk away and totally forget I was logged in. Can't tell you how many times I wake up in the morning, open my laptop to check email and there's SL with the dialog box saying "You've been logged out of Second Life" 🤣

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