NO Linden Home?? Please Vent Here!!

[Raevyn Addams]

4 minutes ago, CoffeeDujour said:

The fraction of the player-base all current forms of messaging reaches is going to be minuscule. Was at a house party the other day, someone asked to tp a friend in .. he hadn't heard of Belli.

Just wait till August and this place is bombed with people freaking out about this Tilia thing they had no idea was coming, and asking all the same basic questions. LL announcing things here and on the blogs is only slightly more visible than the plans to put a bypass though Arthur Dent's house.

You make a valid point! 

*groans and shoulders collapse just thinking about that* 😫

[kiramanell]

47 minutes ago, RaeLeeH said:

The problem, as to why some residents are responding as some perceive as nasty or snarky is that this has been explained on many occasions. On many threads. On many subforums. On various other individual complaints. In the community groups. In Local Chat in-world. I don't think the issue is that the information isn't being delivered; is that the information isn't being received.

There is a popular belief amongst many that purchasing a premium membership automatically guarantees a new house in Bellisseria, therefore they are entitled to their house right now. And many of these same posters have also expressed they are entitled to this home over others, even if they pay premium members too. They fail to understand that they are guaranteed a house, not necessarily a new one; just a premium house. That's the fine print people are overlooking. And when this information is pointed out to them they feel slighted and betrayed. Trying to argue emotion with reason is often futile; it's like trying to reason with a drunk. I don't insinuate these people are drunk, only that their emotions aren't allowing reason to permeate this belief that they want what they want because they want it right now. And we can argue this all day. Some people accept this. Some do not. Whether delivered kindly, patiently, thoughtfully, statistically, logically, reasonably or any other fashion, you cannot make someone believe what they don't want to believe, especially if they believe they are right.

FYI I also worked customer service for many, many years as have a lot of people, no doubt. You do see the best and worst of humanity, and learn that there is no one-size-fits-all approach in dealing with people in general. There is always an onus of responsibility as a company in trying to provide satisfactory customer service or support. There is also an onus of responsibility on the customer in presenting feedback. That old saying "the customer is always right" is wrong; we all screw things up from time to time, it doesn't matter if you are a business or individual. Maybe the complaints aren't unfounded, but the approach often is. Trying to deal with individual crises can be personally draining and overwhelming, especially if you deal with the same crises again and again. At what point do we stop trying to reason with our children as to why it's not safe to run in the house before we give in and let them discover the predictable outcome for themselves?

At the end of the day the fact remains we are all supposed to be adults here, and that suggests a level of maturity that would be expected of an adult, not a child. That goes for both the ones expressing their issues and the ones responding to them. It's a gross generalization to expect everyone matures at the same level, and everyone knows the difference between right and wrong. But knowing and consciously doing are two different things. Sometimes people just don't care; and no amount of kindness will change the situation. So while I do agree with you in theory, in practice... that's another matter.

EDIT: I was ranting this as @CoffeeDujour posted, so I didn't mean to repeat what was already said there.  

 

Hehe, I would never consider anything you say as 'ranting'.  Especially not when you're simply, and calmly explaining things. Couldn't have said it better myself.

The problem, indeed, has never been an alleged lack of empathy. People care plenty. But there is, of course, always, and naturally, the responsibility of the poster to do a little RTFM (in which the 'F' doesn't necessarily stand for 'Fine' *g*) before opening yet another thread about not having received a new home yet. I do not posses the sheer angelic patience of someone like @LittleMe Jewell; so, at some point, I think "If you can't be bothered to read up a little on the matter, then I can't be bothered to explain it all again." Or I will simply say something sarcastic (or at the very least think it). And even when you *do* try and reason, like you say, chances are they will not hear what you're saying... because they essentially don't want to: the purpose of many of these rants seems just to throw out the trantrum, not to try and understand how things works. Like with children in real life, in my experience, mostly you're best off just ignoring the tantrums.  Although the latter is getting progressively harder, as self-entitled rants tend to take up a lof of space on the forums, these days.

Edited July 14, 2019 by kiramanell

[babybluemlch]

"what do we want?"

"BELLI HOMES!"

"when do we want it?"

"NOW!"

[LakotaBlue Tuqiri]

On 7/12/2019 at 1:23 AM, Bitsy Buccaneer said:

Reading through this, it really seems that the loudest, most sarcastic and/or angriest voices on each side are winding each other up and drowning out the quieter ones.

It just makes everything worse. If you don't want to see people complaining then why are you reading this thread in the first place?

Right the whole purpose for the thread was to vent ! Some people are mad at others for venting! 

[Fionalein]

3 hours ago, kiramanell said:

the purpose of many of these rants seems just to throw out the trantrum, not to try and understand how things works.

Hey to be fair please admit that goes for all tantrums - also those from your side

 

[sarah Grot]

12 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

I have a lot of experience with this -- customers in SL. In my early years I was very upset when a customer would try and power-trip me or approach me as if I had set out to harm them or something when they were having trouble with one of my items (usually they couldn't figure out how to use my skybox system as it's very complicated).
My brother told me I needed to toughen up and not be offended, that whenever money changes hands it changes everything (he's a businessman). And I started to realize I really do have power over my customer when they send me money and have to trust they'll get what they'd hoped for. And so when they think they don't get treated fairly some of them will freak out because I actually do have power over them. I mean I could ignore them, I could give them nothing, I could laugh in their face or just say "tough".
But if I talk patiently, kindly, usually they will come around and know I'm not "out to get them" or something.

Wise words  .i often dislike the harsh reactions i read on this forum here , i find it totally unneeded  to low yourself up to the topic starter point of view ,how hard can it be to just either not respond or do it in a more general matter ? 

[harms Lemon]

50 minutes ago, LakotaBlue Tuqiri said:

Right the whole purpose for the thread was to vent ! Some people are mad at others for venting! 

same old story can't please them all 

[Raspberry Crystal]

A lot of these threads look like hit and run posts, but it is an easy way for people who don't understand the system to give feedback.

I wish they would all be moderated together and locked.

Anyone who really wants to stick around and get an answer can start another thread, 'hey why was my post moved?'

[Fionalein]

2 minutes ago, Raspberry Crystal said:

Anyone who really wants to stick around and get an answer can start another thread, 'hey why was my post moved?'

Yeah right - there is absolutely no possiblity this might backfire and anger the resident enough to turn their back and never return. 

[BelleBax]

8 hours ago, RaeLeeH said:

The problem, as to why some residents are responding as some perceive as nasty or snarky is that this has been explained on many occasions. 

@Fritigern Gothly replied to the OP - and I quote, "Bye Felicia".  Is there another way this kind of response should be perceived?  I could appreciate what you're saying more if you didn't qualify responses like this as though the mean-spiritedness of them is only perceived. 

 

 

 

[Raevyn Addams]

Just now, BelleBax said:

@Fritigern Gothly replied to the OP - and I quote, "Bye Felicia".  Is there another way this kind of response should be perceived?  I could appreciate what you're saying more if you didn't qualify responses like this as though the mean-spiritedness of them is only perceived. 

Yes there is. My best friend uses the term "Bye Felicia" as a catch phrase when telling people, basically, goodbye. It makes me laugh when she says it then, it makes me laugh when I see it written. That's MY perception. I understand that since we are different people our perceptions are going to differ. Your perception, if I'm perceiving the tone of your quote correctly, is that you were offended by my perception and subsequent reaction; thus, our perceptions don't align.

The issue your post, and others like them appear to miss, is that there is still humour around despite the tension and frustration in the forums regarding the wait for Linden Homes. And no that does not mean I am trivializing matters; it means exactly what I said above. Its not my place to tell you that I think you are wrong for misinterpreting me as accidents can and do happen. But by the same token you cannot tell me that I am wrong when I perceive something that you don't, or somehow find offensive. We can agree to disagree and not have to go to war over it. But if you choose to take offense that's your call. It's a smile and laugh, nothing more.

[Luna Bliss]

9 hours ago, RaeLeeH said:

I don't think the issue is that the information isn't being delivered; is that the information isn't being received.

 

9 hours ago, RaeLeeH said:

Sometimes people just don't care; and no amount of kindness will change the situation. So while I do agree with you in theory, in practice... that's another matter.

We're all just overgrown kids, and we all want what we want, and we'd prefer to have it right now. Sure, the reasoning adult can dampen this, but our child self is still there. When you respond to people with this awareness instead of telling others they should not have the reality of the child self with its desires then relationships go a lot smoother.

No matter how much information you pump out at people regarding the reality of the Linden Home situation some are still going to look out and see other Premium members having what they do not, and they're going to feel this is unfair. If we don't respond to their feeling they won't hear the information that might help them dampen their feelings a bit so an acceptance of the situation can be reached. So this is why I said "Perhaps reason would prevail if approached in a kind way". IN A KIND WAY is the operative phrase here -- if we respond with kindness they are more likely to hear reason, but if met with anger and derision there's very little chance of them ever receiving the message. In practice, this usually does work -- not just in theory as you've posited.

[Luna Bliss]

10 minutes ago, RaeLeeH said:

Yes there is. My best friend uses the term "Bye Felicia" as a catch phrase when telling people, basically, goodbye. It makes me laugh when she says it then, it makes me laugh when I see it written. That's MY perception. I understand that since we are different people our perceptions are going to differ.

 

bye felicia

 

When someone says that they're leaving and you could really give two shirts less that they are. Their name then becomes "felicia", a random birch that nobody is sad to see go. They're real name becomes irrelevant because nobody cares what it really is. Instead, they now are "felicia".

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=bye felicia

[BelleBax]

5 hours ago, LakotaBlue Tuqiri said:

Right the whole purpose for the thread was to vent ! Some people are mad at others for venting! 

Yes - and thank you for creating the thread.  Obviously it was very much needed. 

One complaint people seem to have is that those of us venting are repeating ourselves.  They're right - we are.  And why shouldn't we?  Multiple times throughout the day and night - as much as I am able to reasonably do so, I go through the process of trying to get a new linden home and I fail.  Going through a process designed to make me fail thousands of times over is frustrating a thousand times over to have a small chance of succeeding.  If I want to vent about it a thousand times - why is this a bad thing?  

They also fail to realize, or ignore, the double standard.  People enjoying their new linden homes are encourage to post pictures, share ideas, etc, on several threads.  I don't object to these at all.  I enjoy seeing what everyone is doing with the new homes.  However, if it's acceptable to say - I love my new home, look at this great thing i did with it a hundred times , why is it not acceptable to say i hate this failing process a hundred times?  

[BJoyful]

6 hours ago, babybluemlch said:

"what do we want?"

"BELLI HOMES!"

"when do we want it?"

"NOW!"

😎  Go Moles!!!  

I love that I’ve seen you around Bellisseria enjoying this lovely new world meeting your neighbours!  I’ll be cheering like crazy when you get yours! 😁

[Luna Bliss]

9 hours ago, RaeLeeH said:

The problem, as to why some residents are responding as some perceive as nasty or snarky is that this has been explained on many occasions. On many threads. On many subforums.

I can understand getting upset from having to explain something over and over. But we need to keep in mind that a good percentage of these people complaining about not getting a Linden Home are individual people and not some 'group' we've been explaining the facts to over and over. The respectful thing to do is treat them like the individual person they are.

[BelleBax]

38 minutes ago, RaeLeeH said:

Yes there is. My best friend uses the term "Bye Felicia" as a catch phrase when telling people, basically, goodbye. It makes me laugh when she says it then, it makes me laugh when I see it written. That's MY perception. I understand that since we are different people our perceptions are going to differ. Your perception, if I'm perceiving the tone of your quote correctly, is that you were offended by my perception and subsequent reaction; thus, our perceptions don't align.

The issue your post, and others like them appear to miss, is that there is still humour around despite the tension and frustration in the forums regarding the wait for Linden Homes. And no that does not mean I am trivializing matters; it means exactly what I said above. Its not my place to tell you that I think you are wrong for misinterpreting me as accidents can and do happen. But by the same token you cannot tell me that I am wrong when I perceive something that you don't, or somehow find offensive. We can agree to disagree and not have to go to war over it. But if you choose to take offense that's your call. It's a smile and laugh, nothing more.

Defending something that is obviously a slight toward the OP doesn't help your point.  In this context - it is in fact intended to be a slight and it accomplished it's task many times over with all the positive reactions given it.  

I do agree that many anti-venting people here are using our complaints as an opportunity to amuse themselves and entertain each other.  That's fine - I don't think it's against the rules.  But understand, you aren't laughing with us, you're laughing at us.  It's a conscious decision, it's mean, and I hope it's worth it.  

Edited July 14, 2019 by BelleBax

[Raspberry Crystal]

4 minutes ago, BelleBax said:

But understand, you aren't laughing with us, you're laughing at us.  It's a conscious decision, it's mean, and I hope it's worth it. 

I'm genuinely confused, I thought your 'bye felicia' image seemed quite mean as a response, but I am not that familiar with internet memes.
 

[Raevyn Addams]

Just now, Luna Bliss said:

I can understand getting upset from having to explain something over and over. But we need to keep in mind that a good percentage of these people complaining about not getting a Linden Home are individual people and not some 'group' we've been explaining the facts to over and over. The respectful thing to do is treat them like the individual person they are.

I'm not quite sure what you're trying to say with the individual quotes except maybe agree with me? Did I read that wrong? If I did I apologize, and I don't mean that in an offensive or insulting manner (I wish I had a dollar for every time I say those words these days. Doesn't that tell you something?) If I am wrong I don't mind being corrected providing its all done in a reasonable and civilized manner. And that's the issue that lay at the heart of this thread, really. Respect is a two-way street. I do try where possible to show respect and be kind to people, even when it's clearly not being shown to me. But there's a fine line between being kind and being a doormat, and reason cannot stop a bullet.

As for the quote above, again I agree with you. I said as much with the 'no one size fits all' comment in my rant. I'm actually agreeing with you for the most part in my entire rant, save for the fact that kindness, no matter how well intentioned, is still not going to break through this disappointment those currently venting (and the OP) is feeling. The only thing that ever will is getting their home. That's it. In an ideal world we could soften the blow until that time, and I'd like to think for at least some people that might be the case in other threads, but as I said and you said in your quote, and we keep missing the fact we actually do agree, there is no blanket solution to this problem beyond what we are already doing, and have been doing for some time now. We can listen, be abused, be mocked and ridiculed for being in a position other people want to be in, but at the end of the day it's all just words. People don't want words; they want a house, and that is something we as residents for all our good intentions, respect, and kindness cannot provide. 😥

[Bitsy Buccaneer]

The forum always gets hit by trolls this time of year. Some of these sorts of threads might be legitimate, but very likely at least some are coming from one or two trolls with multiple throw-away accounts. It's such an easy and obvious target, and given the vehemence with which they're met, a very rewarding one from a trolling point of view.

The best approach to both legitimate and trolling posts on this will probably be for one or two people to post clear, accurate information about the process, reassurances that more houses are being built and a link to Patch's update thread. Bore the trolls, offer quality information to those who are sincere, and don't add fuel to the fire.

[BelleBax]

1 minute ago, Raspberry Crystal said:

I'm genuinely confused, I thought your 'bye felicia' image seemed quite mean as a response, but I am not that familiar with internet memes.
 

Hi there - I was referencing someone else's response.

You are correct, it was a mean response to the original poster's suggesting that she would not maintain her premium membership if she doesn't get a new linden home.  

[Raevyn Addams]

11 minutes ago, BelleBax said:

Defending something that is obviously a slight toward the OP doesn't help your point.  In this context - it is in fact intended to be a slight and it accomplished it's task many times over with all the positive reactions given it.  

I do agree that many anti-venting people here are using our complaints as an opportunity to amuse themselves and entertain each other.  That's fine - I don't think it's against the rules.  But understand, you aren't laughing with us, you're laughing at us.  It's a conscious decision, it's mean, and I hope it's worth it.  

I'm actually agreeing with @Bitsy Buccaneer and stepping back from this as I can't see anything constructive coming from replying. You took offence to a smiling Emoji. I explained it. You are still offended. I am only responsible for what I say, not what you hear, how you perceive, or how you choose to respond. That's all.

[BJoyful]

6 minutes ago, BelleBax said:

Yes - and thank you for creating the thread.  Obviously it was very much needed. 

One complaint people seem to have is that those of us venting are repeating ourselves.  They're right - we are.  And why shouldn't we?  Multiple times throughout the day and night - as much as I am able to reasonably do so, I go through the process of trying to get a new linden home and I fail.  Going through a process designed to make me fail thousands of times over is frustrating a thousand times over to have a small chance of succeeding.  If I want to vent about it a thousand times - why is this a bad thing?  

They also fail to realize, or ignore, the double standard.  People enjoying their new linden homes are encourage to post pictures, share ideas, etc, on several threads.  I don't object to these at all.  I enjoy seeing what everyone is doing with the new homes.  However, if it's acceptable to say - I love my new home, look at this great thing i did with it a hundred times , why is it not acceptable to say i hate this failing process a hundred times?  

HUGS ❤️❤️❤️  BelleBax and all those waiting both patiently and in angst.  Living in Bellisseria is the most wonderful experience we’ve had in SL and we want everyone to enjoy it as much as we do 💕 I think everyone will find its worth the wait In the end and I encourage everyone to hang in there and keep trying because this IS a lottery you WILL be able to win sooner or later! 😉 

Keep visiting and sharing your thoughts 💭 and venting!  

Cheer on our Moles and Lindens, too!  I’m impressed they have made a place so attuned to the wants of so many!! 😁

🤓🥰MOLES😄😁 

 

[BelleBax]

1 minute ago, RaeLeeH said:

I'm actually agreeing with @Bitsy Buccaneer and stepping back from this as I can't see anything constructive coming from replying. You took offence to a smiling Emoji. I explained it. You are still offended. I am only responsible for what I say, not what you hear, how you perceive, or how you choose to respond. That's all.

You misunderstand.  I'm not offended, I'm calling out something  as mean spirited.  For some reason - you don't want to admit it is in fact and intentionally mean spirited.  Simple as that.   

As for you leaving the discussion - i will not say Bye Felicia, because that would be rude, though I guess you would say it's funny. 

 

[Coffee Pancake]

6 hours ago, Raspberry Crystal said:

A lot of these threads look like hit and run posts, but it is an easy way for people who don't understand the system to give feedback.

If we jump on a poster mocking them, we guarantee it's a hit and run post. Why would anyone come back here for fun.