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What is your avatar to you?


Sunbleached
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   This will take more than one sentence to answer. The relationship is complex and has changed over time. 

   At first, she was just this thing I made because that was a part of being here. She was my explorer and my adventurer, and then, my dress up doll. She looked me up and down, appraisingly, and showed me how to be more fashion conscious in my real life.

   Over time, she became part the gentle current that drew me out of my shell. I met more and more people here. I talked with them, boldly taking part in disparate conversations that all occurred simultaneously. They were taxing, I was sometimes exhausted at the end of any given day, but I learned better how to do it. As a result, I got more comfortable with and better at talking to and with people in real space, and to larger groups of them. I wasn't someone who loved speech class in high school.

   Then she became my experimenter, my vehicle for trying new things for which, in my real life, I lack either the freedom, the bravery, the opportunity, or any combination thereof.

   She is my builder, my engineer, my programmer, my sailor, my mermaid, my demon, my socialite, my skydiver.

   There will be more, I am sure.

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   I set out to make Orwar just be 'me', but over time I let him grow into himself; I couldn't accurately portray myself, so he's a less restricted representation of my aesthetic ideals. As time went on, I found the severely lackluster fashion for men was making my other interests (mainly photography) suffer, so I created Nephtyria to have more freedom of expression. I didn't have any real idea of what I'd turn her into at first, I knew she'd get to explore styles that are ill suited to myself, and eventually she'd gotten something of a individual style of her own. I never 'roleplay' her, and I don't ever pretend to be anyone else than who I am through her, but she's more than a 'doll' to dress up and play with.

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I second most of the sentiment here; though what Rae is varies from day to day depending on my mood.

Sometimes all I want to do is take photographs, so she's my model. Sometimes I just wander the grid to shop and she's my socialite. I decorate or build and she's my creative outlet. When I feel wordy (or did) she was my muse or mouthpiece. She's my explorer. She's a window into sexual freedom - or just a sense of freedom itself away from all the constraints that come with real life. One of those, and my favourite role for her, is mother. I love being a mum in SL and can't bear children in RL. I love the fact she's versatile, and can look or act or be whatever I want because I want or realistically can't without a great deal of money, time, commitment and god-like magic.

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On 6/14/2019 at 9:28 PM, Sunbleached said:

For example, my avatar is my GF.

I hope you mean "My avatar is a representation of my RL GF". But somehow I doubt it. :S

My avatar is basically me, though his usual appearance and his name are based on my favourite character from Tolkien's legendarium.

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Belinda is a perfect version of me. She is more daring and adventurous, but carries my moral compass, at least to a degree...(haha).

I came here as me because I didn't know any different. Here I've learned things about myself I didn't know from RL.

My two alts are the perfect sisters I wish I had in RL. I've fallen into RPing them, but I love them like real sisters.

I get a real sense of release, freedom and relaxation here in SL. I never expected it to be like this.

Oh and the Forum Angels are such good company, whether we meet up or not. I wish RL was a bit more like this.

Edited by BelindaN
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