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elixdude

Do you like playing SL alone?

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Posted (edited)

I joined SL over 10 years ago and when I started I was super friendly - chatted to strangers all the time (unlike me in RL) and made some nice friends.

Since then friends have left or I've just fallen out of contact and now I hardly ever speak to anyone (let alone strangers:) ). When I do come across other people on SL hardly anyone starts a conversation and my natural state is to be a bit shy in doing so (I think I was just super excited about SL in the beginning and didn't fear starting up conversations). 

I usually just spend my time tweaking my park and gallery, or my homes, go shopping or visit places from the destination guide and take photos. One of my favourite things is to explore places and sometimes I'll blog about them too. There are so many beautiful places to visit I never get tired of that. On the whole I'm very solitary now, although if anyone does ever want to chat to me I'm always open to it.

Edited by Evangeline Arcadia
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Posted (edited)
15 minutes ago, Evangeline Arcadia said:

I joined SL over 10 years ago and when I started I was super friendly - chatted to strangers all the time (unlike me in RL) and made some nice friends.

Since then friends have left or I've just fallen out of contact and now I hardly ever speak to anyone (let alone strangers:) ). When I do come across other people on SL hardly anyone starts a conversation and my natural state is to be a bit shy in doing so (I think I was just super excited about SL in the beginning and didn't fear starting up conversations). 

 Similar situation, really. My main (this) dates back to Jan 31 2008, my alt a few months younger. I had a break between 2013-ish to 2017. Just out of curiosity, and after logging into the Beta grid, I saw some old names somehow still on my list (maybe it was because I was using Firestorm instead of the LL viewer, I don't know how that works)--tried reaching out a few times on the main grid. For whatever reason, no luck. I didn't lose sleep over it, though. 

Edited by Nastasha Szaberwick
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I also just remembered, I used to belong to a lot of discussion groups and other groups. So I would interact more with people like that too in the early days. This was partly because of the hours I used to work . Often the groups were held in US convenient time, which because of work and my sleep hours meant I could attend. But now I'm not doing that anymore attending them just isn't possible because I'm not in the US. So that's another reason I've less contact with others now.

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Posted (edited)

I spend more time alone now than I used to back when I first started. Originally I logged in to explore the grid, meet new people, and spend time with them. From there I found a gated community to live, adopted a child (avatar) and a few sculpted babies, started an OOC family, and lived in a very light role play scenario. That evolved to more traditional role play, which led to owning and creating several RP sims, managing various groups, and building projects to that same end. For a while things were incredibly hectic. And then after about 5 or 6 years the role play world felt stale to me, so scripting became my #1 reason to log in. You don't really need a lot of people around to do that, but it can at times get a little lonely, day-in, day-out. When interest in scripting waned, I took another sabbatical, which seems to happen at least once a year or so for a few months to recharge my creative batteries so to speak. And as to be expected it seems like every time I return the world I used to know grows a little smaller. Not many people I knew back in the day are still in SL anymore, though there are the odd few that build now, so occasionally we bounce ideas off each other, or meet up some place and just hang out. In a way I guess you could say things have come full circle.

Now I'm back to exploring, looking at gated communities again, and awaiting the release of animesh babies to restart my own little OOC family. The one thing that has never changed for me is being a "mum" in Second Life for all that entails, if even just to scripted objects. But generally I'm spending more time doing my own thing. Personally I think for me and a few other older accounts I've spoken to about the subject, after you've been in SL for a few years you start to feel like you've done everything, or seen much of the same things, so it's a case of finding the next challenge or wandering around until you stumble across it, whatever that happens to be.

Edited by RaeLeeH
Typos >.<
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On 3/1/2019 at 10:32 PM, Ina Fairport said:

In my early SL years, 2006 and later, I had many friends.
All friends of the past are gone and I find it very difficult to make new friends so most of the time I am alone in SL. I sail a lot and i fly a lot. SL is still fun but the good old days are gone....

Same here... im in SL since 2007 then had a brake and returned. All friends are gone... but i actually enjoy exploring and go wherever i want and when 🙃

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meh, it's not that i don't want friends, but the very flighty nature of SL has made me very selective of who i want around me, as well as the preoccupation (and in some cases, plain old narcissism) some people have with avatar looks, or who they want you to be, or what they wanna do, start a family, etc. list goes on , that i prefer to wait and see if i meet people where the friendship lasts more than a hot minute and we can chat for hours over nothing , or go on an adventure that isn't driven by a single persons grand design. till i meet that person/people i am quite content to walk the streets alone, amuse myself and be happy af.

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I do a lot of stuff on my own like exploring,shopping and things like that. However, It makes me appreciate cuddle time a lot more, even if we're tabbed out watching YouTube videos or playing other games. lol

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Great topic and very relevant to me. I've been in SL over 10 years total and looking back over that time I've been alone 90% of it. My first SL marriage lasted 5 years but she grew tired of SL after the first couple years and abandoned me for the most part until I finally asked for a divorce. I recently married again thinking things would be different but my current partner has also stopped being in-world very much ... it's a bit like a recurring nightmare.  LOL   However - what I did with those 10 years is what counts and I did a lot. I taught myself how to design and build, I founded 3 stores and an art gallery and work as a guest designer for other businesses. So it's all good -I am pretty happy and fulfilled over all and now just looking for activity companions for fun stuff like surfing, sailing, diving and exploring. 

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If you ever want to shake things up a bit then try some role-play. One is rarely alone in these scenarios and there are genres to suit most flavors like Medieval, Fantasy (magic, faeries, Lycans and Vampires, etc) - Game of Thrones, cyberpunk...even good old fashioned Wild West (Hey, my Apache tribe could use more MEN! LOL). And no: Role-play isn't difficult (in fact, many times we just relax around the campfire and chat general things not so pioneering days-related).

Anyway, my point is that you will surround yourself with others that share at least some interests with you. And that's where stronger friendships are made and they tend to "stick". Many time my role-play friends and I will pop out of the Mexico Sanora desert to go sailing in the Blake Sea or leave Bear Creek Township's horses alone (we like to steal horses and burn down barns) and go train-riding at Heterocera Atoll.

As for the relationship stuff that many people like? There's that, too. Many marriages, partnerships, all kinds of stuff happen in these role-plays also. My main tip, if you choose to at least look into this stuff, try to not let an empty region dissuade you. Some role-play regions have peaks and valleys in concurrency - investigate at different hours of the day. My Apache tribe, for example, have many Europeans who are often there throughout the SL Daytime (between 9AM and 1 or 2PM (which works great for me as my in-world time skews to match their in-world time, even though I am in Pacific coast.)

Just saying a little perseverance and patience (and thinking outside the box) can go a long way in finding freinds. You don't have to keep standing around at the nudie beaches, club-hopping, and all the same things over and over again hoping for a different result (which by definition is.... nevermind LOL).

Besides, it's a lot of fun to play dress-up in a themed costume sometimes. :D

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As much as I love logging in, I do not love the solitude 100% I'm not really sure what is wrong with me. I want to interact, make friends...But even when it comes to a bar that I have been visiting since 2010 I still stay as far away from people as I can. If I am close friends with someone or if I am in a relationship, I'll happily invade that person's personal space. I'll be super active in a group chat, but when it comes to being around other people... no Bueno. It's like that social butterfly part of me turns off and I hiss at anyone who tries touching me.

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I don't mind being alone on SL. I'd rather have some friends to hang out with and sort-of RP with but it's still fun without them. I can do my creative projects and sort of RP by myself, going around the house and shopping and taking care of NPC prim kids. I mostly go for realism these days, came back last year after a 2-year hiatus, so most RP sims are out. In fact I'd intended to join a Game of Thrones RP but started some other things first and decided not to bother, though I'd join one if I found one that was starting up and very open to new players.

IDK. I really like my avatar's "story," some parts are very specific, and it would be hard for other people to fit into it except as some acquaintances here and there.

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I enjoy "me" time in SL - time when I just sit, watch the sun and listen to the calm piano music on my parcel. It's a necessary time for me as it allows me to process things in my mind and prepare for others.

That said I also enjoy going out into the world, meeting people and interacting but try to avoid all those busy events as it makes my viewer grind to a halt :)

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No. 

I absolutely hated being alone that is one of the reasons that I din't logged in around two months now. 

I wasn't alone because I can't make friends. I never had problem going out saying hello and making friends. I think I have a good sense of humor even it is a bit twisted sometime. Even some ppl rom here was on my friend list. 

My problem is that sadly I'm not really ok in the head. I have a mental breakdown quite often, and that is the time when my self hatred, paranoia, lack of self-esteem  kicks in. 

IRL I learned to pretend that everything ok even when a voice in my head constantly repeating what a worthless peace of sh!# I'm and nobody want me around. 

But in SL didn't real had time to and somehow it is stronger then in RL. 

So what's happen I have one of my episode of sh!# storm and I remove everybody from my friend list because "Nobody want be your friend!" "They don't like you just laughing behind your back!" " Seriously you thought that they wan your company?" "If they tolerated you then they want something from you!" .

After when the storm is over I realize it's not true but then I feel ashamed and I don't want to explain or offer friendship again. 

 

Then for a while I wondered around alone. What sorted the friend list problem. But in the end I just gave up uninstalled Sl and that's it. 

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When I am not working my SL job I spend a lot of time  solo, seems people are not as social as the good old days, seems very clicky, Im not much into RP, Im just me...easy going , like to shop, laugh, play games, build, texture, Im learning blender as well, anybody share any similar interest Im down for some new friends hmu in game...

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I don't really like to spend time alone in sl.  But I don't have that many friends, so I ended up exploring on my own.  I enjoy sim decorations so that dont need any companion and also taking photos.  I also do some fishing here and there for some linden.  So after a while I sort of get use to it.  Haha rather sad but it happens.

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Posted (edited)

Well I am  currently offline other than here on my cell, due to my two cats separately doing things that messed up my computer. One of them finally  broke it. But I usually like being around people I know in SL. And sometimes I enjoy meeting new people. My few issues are people who don't read the profile and don't act accordingly, asking my age before you talk to me, and calling me baby or other names I ask that person not to use. Generally rudeness, mainly. But usually I enjoy being around people when I am inworld. and as one talk show host said, leave the negativity at the door. There are some people in SL just to make other SL people miserable. Those are the ones I prefer to avoid.. Well now I need to do some research and find my next computer.. hopefully sooner rather than later.

Edited by SierraStyles

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Been in SL a long time, and always felt alone in a crowd when I went places. In a way, it was sort of comforting. But eventually, there would be an IM,  and conversation would be good, then things would progress, and then in the end, weeks or months later, I'd be a wreck. I finally gave up on people in a virtual world, but found a happy medium. Owning a sim and creating a public place people would come to and enjoy gave me a new sort of satisfaction. It's like sharing myself with others, without the emotional attachment. Now I'm always alone, but not... It's not perfect, but it's good for me.

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15 hours ago, Morena Tully said:

Been in SL a long time, and always felt alone in a crowd when I went places. In a way, it was sort of comforting. But eventually, there would be an IM,  and conversation would be good, then things would progress, and then in the end, weeks or months later, I'd be a wreck. I finally gave up on people in a virtual world, but found a happy medium. Owning a sim and creating a public place people would come to and enjoy gave me a new sort of satisfaction. It's like sharing myself with others, without the emotional attachment. Now I'm always alone, but not... It's not perfect, but it's good for me.

I know that feeling. All. Too. Well.

I just can't afford land any more so I tend to spend all my time on a build platform in a sandbox. :(

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I've done nothing but play SL alone so far. It's not that I don't want to play with others it's just you can force a connection, it has to happen organically, and so far everyone I've spoken to it has been casual while I'm exploring and then we never see each other again. I'm sure if I meet someone I really click with I'll ask them to if it is fine to friend them, but until then I guess I'll just keep being a little explorer. 

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On 5/11/2019 at 6:25 PM, SierraStyles said:

due to my two cats separately doing things that messed up my computer.

image.png.6412d4b4681a5c21059ea43fcc13b405.pngimage.png.c3d917c952677314715098af9fa5918c.pngimage.png.4c696d9dc84c987b1653466aabc07a06.png  Those darn cats!

 

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@Jameson2001; Looks pretty accurate to me. The male cat knocked the PC on the floor so probably time for a new one.. For some reason that computer  was  messed up after the first month. Now on to find one that won't break down after one month..

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I have one or two people I like to hang out with for doing nothing or doing stuff like going to dances and shopping, but I also have a ball exploring on my own.  I did that a lot of necessity in the beginning as I wasn't all that into shopping and that seemed to be where people were.  Slowly, I found communities I liked and regular activities (weekly in most cases) and so I have a social life... but mostly (when I do) I build on my own.  I explore on my own or with one particular friend whose company is fun even when I'm feeling mostly asocial.  she's no drama, I'm no drama, it's a thing. 

Tinkering actually is easier alone as I don't do voice (I like to listen to the radio or music while I'm on SL) and I cannot type and tinker effectively at the same time.  I'm not a big builder, however.  I do periodic reordering and add new things to my place but mostly I like having a 'home' and don't really churn it as much as some others I know.

I actually find avatar tinkering and dressing for dances more fun with my friend...  we give each other feedback and kid around -- kinda like getting ready for any event in real life with a friend.

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