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1 minute ago, Gregorian Chant said:

I wish all the tasty foods aren't so fattening.

   Granted, but they instead have a tendency to cause painful flatulence.

   I wish there was perpetual night and winter in all of the world.

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grants you a BJ but performed by a werewolf   (yeah I know I was just getting it on track, don't kill me ) I wish for more LI on my homestead

Granted! We're sending a bladerunner to retire you right now. I wish I could eat all the candy I want and not get cavities. 

Granted, you are an elephant with a USB storage stick where your brain should be. I wish for instant full rez everywhere I land.

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1 hour ago, Orwar said:

   Granted, but they instead have a tendency to cause painful flatulence.

   I wish there was perpetual night and winter in all of the world.

Granted, but it was caused by a global thermonuclear war and all life on Earth is now dead.

I wish it was perpetual summer, and only ever rained at night.

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1 hour ago, Matty Luminos said:

Granted, but it was caused by a global thermonuclear war and all life on Earth is now dead.

Don't say that.  I was out working in the yard today and suddenly noticed a lot more jets going over than usual.  I started to wonder if this was THE END.  Well, at least I got out of raking leaves.

 

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12 hours ago, Matty Luminos said:

Granted, but it was caused by a global thermonuclear war and all life on Earth is now dead.

I wish it was perpetual summer, and only ever rained at night.

Granted. But the entire population in the opposite hemisphere hate you to no end and all move to your location, creating over-crowding and material shortages.

I wish we had flying cars now..

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16 minutes ago, Alyona Su said:

Granted. But the entire population in the opposite hemisphere hate you to no end and all move to your location, creating over-crowding and material shortages.

I wish we had flying cars now..

Granted. But all those cars in the sky black the sunlight, plants die, and there is a food shortage. 

I wish we had an all drug olympics!!!

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5 minutes ago, Marut72 said:

I wish I could communicate telepathically with the wonderful people of this forum. 

Granted.  But now that you know how much the forum ladies ACTUALLY lust after you, you die of anticipated exhaustion.

And, for completeness,

4 hours ago, Marut72 said:

I wish we had an all drug olympics!!!

Granted.  But after the runners all exceed the speed of sound, the Olympics is banned for noise pollution.

I wish my RL lingerie looked as sexy as my SL lingerie.

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14 minutes ago, Amina Sopwith said:

We're all mad here.

Granted, and now we're in a Tower of Babel story.

I wish I'd done all my Christmas shopping.

Granted. Christmas shipping is done. Everyone gets gift cards to the mall. 

I wish we paid with candy for goods and services so you could have the option to eat some of your savings. 

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Granted! Unfortunately, the world's banking infrastructure has collapsed overnight. Only the Bank of Jim's Apple Store remains solvent, and businesses are showing a great reluctance to sell their shares for (chocolate covered) peanuts, causing further mayhem on the stock markets. The NYSE have engaged a well-known firm of private detectives to hunt down the cause of all this....

I damn well wish that I didn't hate sugar!

 

(Just checked my facts - its "Jim's Apple Farm". Google it if you've never heard of it!)

Edited by Odaks
Correction
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3 hours ago, Amina Sopwith said:

Granted, you love it and now you're fat, toothless and diabetic. 

I wish I hated sugar.

Granted. You hate sugar but to compensate you start smoking, put salt on everything and take up drinking not realizing that alcohol is sugar :) 

you live a fast, drunk, smokey life, BUT happily without sugar 

I wish I made more time to read fiction. 

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10 minutes ago, Lindal Kidd said:

Granted.  But by making time, you get out of sync with everyone else.  You live a long, fiction-filled life of 90 years, and die by the end of next week.

I wish I wrote more fiction about Time.

Granted, but you'll only be writing for politicians to use in mudslinging campaigns.

I wish I could dance as well as my avatar.

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8 hours ago, Gregorian Chant said:

Granted, but you'll only be writing for politicians to use in mudslinging campaigns.

I wish I could dance as well as my avatar.

Granted, but it requires a music device be implanted into your brain and Second Life-based dancing animation files loaded into it and it detaches itself whenever your cross the line from one jurisdiction into the next.

I wish time moved twice as fast when at work and twice as slow when not.

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4 minutes ago, Alyona Su said:

Granted, but it requires a music device be implanted into your brain and Second Life-based dancing animation files loaded into it and it detaches itself whenever your cross the line from one jurisdiction into the next.

I wish time moved twice as fast when at work and twice as slow when not.

Granted. While work moves twice as fast, your real life moves twice as slow, including speech and movement. You have literally pressed slow motion and are forever out of sync.

I wish hotel coffee tasted better. Much better.

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