Jump to content
Hollie Leavitt

RP.... I don't get it

Recommended Posts

10 minutes ago, lavalois said:

Impossible, you can't attach something to an avatar without the avatar's consent. Even with RLV, you first have to turn on RLV. So she DID know. You were lied to.

OoooOooOoooo.....!!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
11 hours ago, animats said:

Yes.

Useful info: everyone has a profile, and reading it before roleplaying is expected. This creates the amusing social convention that when you meet face to face, there's a stall while you read each other's profiles.

naw, a lot of times i've read someones profile before they even fully rezzed. It's very possible i want nothing to do with them before they even say hello.

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hiya, I spent around 9 years with a family here (we came to sl together)

Some of us were an open book & discussed anything & everything, and at least one person barely mentioned RL, so just do whatever works for you

We didn't really rp, we just were ourselves and would call each other Sis/Bro etc, just do what is right for you or ask your bf how it all works for them, as we're all different

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi OP!

A lot of people see Second Life as a game, yes. Which in a way it is and in a way it's not. Second Life (to me) is more of a highly interactive chatroom of sorts. Except you're not stuck in one "room" and instead of using your imagination, you can see you, other people, and the world around you; all of which you can freely enjoy (to a point...)

Some will argue that Second Life is not a game because there is no goal. You don't level up, you don't get experience and there's no loot. But at the same time, there is...

The goal is to make connections with your fellow man. You only level up if you're playing a game (Primal Life, Linden Realms, etc), the experience you gain is the process of learning how to work Second Life, how to "deal" with difficult people and the drama they bring, but also the good people and the timeless love they give you and you give them. LOOT would be known as the endless amount of creators who offer their "wares" for us to choose from.

As far as the families go, I don't get it. The farthest I personally wish to go is being partnered. The whole "have kids and a family" is strange, unless you're describing someone as "a brother from another mother" "sister from another mister" in jest, which in RL you also gain friends that you feel are like family. Though I am not saying those who decide to get pregnant and have the whole family experience is negative, that's their choice, just as much as being childless is mine.

With the "relationships" bit, it is strange. Married in RL and partnered in SL. But I guess that's just another level of connections (like I said above) - one of my friends is married and we dated for some time in SL and his wife, hell, she became one of my closest friends. It's all about trust. But, if you notice in one documentary in particular (LIFE 2.0) such partnerships can destroy RL relationships and even families because the RL partners don't understand, and don't appreciate what their husband/wife is doing.

I personally love to role play. But not with anything of the above. I'll decorate my avatar into something different (a Dinosaur, a Furry, a Na'vi, etc) and find like-minded people to have fun with because I love to immerse myself in a fantasy world, even if it's just for a small time. I love to write, and "play pretend" but eventually I do have to log off and go back to my RL; if I let SL control me in such a way, I would go mad and my RL would suffer.

Laoise is what I think is beautiful. It's what I love to see in other women; the fit, yet curves in the right places kind of shape. As far as fashion goes, it's what I wish I could have and wear in RL; I look nothing like Laoise, but it's what's inside of me that makes me Laoise...If that makes any sense.

...The "she got pregnant from ... without her consent" should be seen as harassment, trolling, griefing- whatever term you want to use. If I am right, there was (or is) a ***** system that would "scan" victims and impregnate them; and you had to go to a clinic to "abort" the child for 200L ... Which is, to me, a scam.

But it's only words. If you show up in a database (think Bloodlines) it's up to you what to do from that point. But just remember that NO ONE can tell you what to do, how to dress or how to feel in Second Life. Even "masters/mistresses/doms" can only go so far before it becomes asinine.

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes, there are games within SL however, SL itself is not a game. SL is a creative platform of which MMOs began following suit some years after SL was opened to the public (2003) and began allowing "building" due to popular demand.

For some, the family thing is a means of being able to have/do something they can't do in RL. While it isn't for me, I do understand that SL is a means of being able to have children for those who can't have them in RL. A means of experiencing something, that for whatever reason, has been denied them otherwise. There are also those whose families are pretty crappy/dysfunctional. SL provides them with the means to be able to experience what a non-dysfunction family is like.

It is also something that those with "addictive personalities" should avoid.

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Some people consider their avatars are characters, some that they are a representation of their RL selves. It depends on each and everyone but it's always nice to have a heads up just to be sure if they have the same goals and preferences as you before any awkward friendship is born.

  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 hours ago, Hollie Leavitt said:

Thanks for the awesome breakdown of the two categories.. I definitely think I am in the first one.

I lean towards @Akane Nacht's approach of being "here for my own fun not theirs".. I do wonder and worry a bit though.. if anyone ever gets offended when someone decides they don't want to be part of the family.. Would they see it as some sort of rejection or something? I'm treading so carefully here!

I'm sure somewhere along the way in the history of SL an SL resident has gotten offended and felt rejected when someone left their "family", buuuut, ya know...you can't really control someone else's reactions. >.<

The flip side of it, tho, you shouldn't go through anything you're not comfortable with, regardless of how they may react. >.> in this case, i think, it takes more than one to compromise. If you approach it all with nothing but a good attitude, stay polite, and be clear...then, ya know, you did your part.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, momomoonusagi said:

I'm sure somewhere along the way in the history of SL an SL resident has gotten offended and felt rejected when someone left their "family", buuuut, ya know...you can't really control someone else's reactions. >.<

The flip side of it, tho, you shouldn't go through anything you're not comfortable with, regardless of how they may react. >.> in this case, i think, it takes more than one to compromise. If you approach it all with nothing but a good attitude, stay polite, and be clear...then, ya know, you did your part.

Exactly. I learned that the hard way ?

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/14/2018 at 4:20 PM, Hollie Leavitt said:

Are we all just playing characters here and is this all just a game? How serious is it?

This is something you need to actually sit down and talk about with the people involved. Some people will act like SL is 100% fantasy and nothing matters, while others use SL as a social platform with their avatar being just an extension of themselves.

So when someone says "let's date" or "I love you," it could be just implicit RP or the actual person likes you.

Personally, exactly because I don't like vague boundaries, I keep RP very explicit by beginning every RP line with "/me" so it gets italicized and clearly different from regular chat. Not that I RP much at all.

I have also used the love word outside of RP, you can absolutely form real, long-term, long-distance relationships on SL.

Edited by Wulfie Reanimator
  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/15/2018 at 3:33 AM, Quinn Lysette said:

 oh an if you meet any sl vampires just ignore them and leave they seem to be insane with the whole vampire thing an nag you alot

These people you meet are playing a HUD-based vampire game that encourages people to annoy others.  This does not represent all SL vampires that you will meet.  Contrary to common belief, some of us do not really want to bite everyone we meet just in the same way most people don't want to have sex with everyone they meet.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Gabriele Graves said:

in the same way most people don't want to have sex with everyone they meet

This is Quinn you're talking to here xD (assuming that the 'everyone' in question could pass his "I have ways of telling if you're a RL female" test...)

  • Haha 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I personally tend to stay away from the whole SL family stuff. Especially when the "parents" have like 7+ "kids", also when the parents have cutesy nicknames like "Hubby" or "Wifey". *****ing creepy. Like people, you not *****ing children anymore, stop with the kiddie cutesy *****, ITS NOT CUTE, just creepy.

  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
59 minutes ago, chaosninja7 said:

I personally tend to stay away from the whole SL family stuff. Especially when the "parents" have like 7+ "kids", also when the parents have cutesy nicknames like "Hubby" or "Wifey". *****ing creepy. Like people, you not *****ing children anymore, stop with the kiddie cutesy *****, ITS NOT CUTE, just creepy.

i call my RL wife "wifey"... Not sure how those are "cutesy" its a nickname. Is it really necessary to use such language in a post? I mean a pair of F-bombs? And you complain about people not acting adult? 

captain-america.jpg.e6eb03c4cabb0a127d4f43557ef857ef.jpg

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 2
  • Haha 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/14/2018 at 9:20 AM, Hollie Leavitt said:

I've only recently been going on SL inworld, mainly to take pictures, sort my crazy inventory... nothing overly exciting. I happened to meet someone who instantly asks me to be his gf, so I play along.. why not? In the span of a week, the L word has been said, I have been introduced to his SL aunt or second mom or whatever, and I have now met his SL sister. I'm starting to feel a little baffled at this point... I mean, what is going on? And what are the rules here?

More specifically, I am trying to figure out:
- Are we all just playing characters here and is this all just a game? How serious is it?
- How engrossed is everyone in the characters they are playing, and to that effect, what is the appropriate level of separation to have between the RP and RL?
This question comes to mind because in the RP that I have accidentally found myself in, I have actually been asked questions about my RL, such as where I am from and how old I am... but then, all the rest that is happening seems to be so far from reality. No one seems to be explicitly spelling out the boundaries... so how does everyone get on the same page about how much of their real lives they bring into SL and how much they leave out? (or did I miss that meeting!?)
- This SL family spends a whole lot of time together at events... daily... it makes me wonder how they manage to maintain their RL relationships at all. Particularly the SL mom and SL dad - they're so involved in their SL marriage, while I'm trying to work out whether or not this is real for them.. and how they're able to love their RL wife/hubby and love their SL wife/hubby at the same time? Clearly there is something I am not quite understanding.

If I ever found myself in a confusing situation IRL, I'd just ask the people involved... but I don't want to accidentally disrupt their RP by bombarding them with questions about their RL and their RP characters.. so I defer to you all.

While I know you won't be able to answer for the SL family I have, please share your thoughts on your own experiences and how you approach your RP in SL, and what it means for you, what rules you follow, where you draw the line between RL and SL.. Do you talk about your RL at all? Is it real for you or are you constantly aware of the fact that you are just playing?

Sorry in advance for the super long post!... and thanks!

-Firstly, It really irks me when people refer to Second Life as a game, when in order for something to be a game there would need to be an objective, or objectives in place, that you would need to complete. In Pet Rescue Saga it's getting all the pets to the bottom in a set amount of moves, In Fortnite, the objective is to be the last surviving player and so forth. Although there are games like Cards HUmanity, Greedy, etc in Second Life, SL itself is not a game, it's a virtual platform to create, talk with other people, take pictures and be whomever you wish to be, whether it be yourself, a furrie, anime girl, even a brony if you want

- NOT EVERYONE IN SL IS PLAYING A CHARACTER 100% OF THE TIME. Yes, a lot of people do, and a lot of people ( including me) RP in second life, but not everyone does and as for the SL family you've found yourself in I highly doubt that that's RP, especially if they spend a lot of time together. There are a lot of SL families that, at the end of the day, are a group of close-knit friends. People have SL families for a number of reasons, whether it be their RL one isn't good, they don't have one, there's a lot of reasons.

- A lot of SL couples are also an RL thing. One of my longest relationships was through SL and it was also an RL one as well. I'm not saying that's the case for EVERY SL relationship, I'm partnered with one of my closest friends because we wanted guys to stop asking if we were looking to fill that space lol.

- Its normal for people to ask where you're from and how old you are, with that being said though, you shouldn't rely on someone else to set boundaries.

   For example, mine is:

      1. I will not send anyone my phone number, skype, discord, FB, nothing until I get to know them better

      2. I reserve voice for close friends ( Unless I'm applying for an Sl job and they need me to voice verify)

      3. I will not give RL details of what I'm wearing

- I think a lot of your confusion would be resolved if you stopped looking at this like it was an RP. I mean if all else fails, come right out and ask them, then if it's more serious than you would like then simply leave because, and I speak from what I've seen and have experienced myself, if they find out that this is just a game of sorts to you, when for everyone else involved it isn't, it could lead to more problems and drama that could easily be avoided by simply asking

Edited by IvyLarae
  • Like 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/16/2018 at 2:58 AM, Laoise Rumsford said:

Hi OP!

A lot of people see Second Life as a game, yes. Which in a way it is and in a way it's not. Second Life (to me) is more of a highly interactive chatroom of sorts. Except you're not stuck in one "room" and instead of using your imagination, you can see you, other people, and the world around you; all of which you can freely enjoy (to a point...)

Some will argue that Second Life is not a game because there is no goal. You don't level up, you don't get experience and there's no loot. But at the same time, there is...

The goal is to make connections with your fellow man. You only level up if you're playing a game (Primal Life, Linden Realms, etc), the experience you gain is the process of learning how to work Second Life, how to "deal" with difficult people and the drama they bring, but also the good people and the timeless love they give you and you give them. LOOT would be known as the endless amount of creators who offer their "wares" for us to choose from.

As far as the families go, I don't get it. The farthest I personally wish to go is being partnered. The whole "have kids and a family" is strange, unless you're describing someone as "a brother from another mother" "sister from another mister" in jest, which in RL you also gain friends that you feel are like family. Though I am not saying those who decide to get pregnant and have the whole family experience is negative, that's their choice, just as much as being childless is mine.

With the "relationships" bit, it is strange. Married in RL and partnered in SL. But I guess that's just another level of connections (like I said above) - one of my friends is married and we dated for some time in SL and his wife, hell, she became one of my closest friends. It's all about trust. But, if you notice in one documentary in particular (LIFE 2.0) such partnerships can destroy RL relationships and even families because the RL partners don't understand, and don't appreciate what their husband/wife is doing.

I personally love to role play. But not with anything of the above. I'll decorate my avatar into something different (a Dinosaur, a Furry, a Na'vi, etc) and find like-minded people to have fun with because I love to immerse myself in a fantasy world, even if it's just for a small time. I love to write, and "play pretend" but eventually I do have to log off and go back to my RL; if I let SL control me in such a way, I would go mad and my RL would suffer.

Laoise is what I think is beautiful. It's what I love to see in other women; the fit, yet curves in the right places kind of shape. As far as fashion goes, it's what I wish I could have and wear in RL; I look nothing like Laoise, but it's what's inside of me that makes me Laoise...If that makes any sense.

...The "she got pregnant from ... without her consent" should be seen as harassment, trolling, griefing- whatever term you want to use. If I am right, there was (or is) a ***** system that would "scan" victims and impregnate them; and you had to go to a clinic to "abort" the child for 200L ... Which is, to me, a scam.

But it's only words. If you show up in a database (think Bloodlines) it's up to you what to do from that point. But just remember that NO ONE can tell you what to do, how to dress or how to feel in Second Life. Even "masters/mistresses/doms" can only go so far before it becomes asinine.

Your perspective resonates with my own quite a lot, but has also added new insights for me so thank you ? 

And yes, the part about Laoise makes so much sense it's almost as if you were reading my mind!

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/15/2018 at 3:54 AM, Talligurl said:

Oh the love word, I used to avoid it like it was poison, but then I started to realize that no one here actual knows me enough to really love me, so it is just a lie used to get what they want, so I just lie back to them to try to get what I want.

have had similar conversations. Which kinda go:

them: i love you

me: no you don't

them: do so

me: do not. You just wanna bump my pixels

them: oh ok then. That's true. Wanna get married?

me: no

them: we would be good together. You totally get me

 

  • Like 1
  • Haha 6

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
18 hours ago, chaosninja7 said:

I personally tend to stay away from the whole SL family stuff. Especially when the "parents" have like 7+ "kids", also when the parents have cutesy nicknames like "Hubby" or "Wifey". *****ing creepy. Like people, you not *****ing children anymore, stop with the kiddie cutesy *****, ITS NOT CUTE, just creepy.

I tried the whole " SL family " thing once for a friend of mine. And everyone in that family was a bunch of dysfunctional people. I left and never looked back. If only you heard them on voice chat.. you would cringe to the death. I've never in my life met a group of people so freaking sick in the head.

Edited by Minx Kurosawa
  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/14/2018 at 11:20 PM, Hollie Leavitt said:

More specifically, I am trying to figure out:
1) Are we all just playing characters here and is this all just a game? How serious is it?
2) How engrossed is everyone in the characters they are playing, and to that effect, what is the appropriate level of separation to have between the RP and RL?
This question comes to mind because in the RP that I have accidentally found myself in, I have actually been asked questions about my RL, such as where I am from and how old I am... but then, all the rest that is happening seems to be so far from reality. No one seems to be explicitly spelling out the boundaries... so how does everyone get on the same page about how much of their real lives they bring into SL and how much they leave out? (or did I miss that meeting!?)
3) This SL family spends a whole lot of time together at events... daily... it makes me wonder how they manage to maintain their RL relationships at all. Particularly the SL mom and SL dad - they're so involved in their SL marriage, while I'm trying to work out whether or not this is real for them.. and how they're able to love their RL wife/hubby and love their SL wife/hubby at the same time? Clearly there is something I am not quite understanding.

If I ever found myself in a confusing situation IRL, I'd just ask the people involved... but I don't want to accidentally disrupt their RP by bombarding them with questions about their RL and their RP characters.. so I defer to you all.

While I know you won't be able to answer for the SL family I have, please share your thoughts on your own experiences and how you approach your RP in SL, and what it means for you, what rules you follow, where you draw the line between RL and SL.. Do you talk about your RL at all? Is it real for you or are you constantly aware of the fact that you are just playing?

Sorry in advance for the super long post!... and thanks!

Let me have a crack at this.

1) Everyone comes to SL for a different reason, so there's no easy answer to this. I like to roleplay in SL. I am playing a character, and I tend to make that very clear. I also like to play other characters in different genres and roleplay settings (so I have my normal character, a sci-fi character, a western character, etc). However, some people aren't roleplaying. In the kid community, there are endless reasons why we play kids, and for some, playing a kid gives them a chance at a childhood they never had. I have friends who play child avatars but are not roleplaying like I am; their avatar is them. So for someone like me, I'm not taking things to seriously, but you can see how some might because being in SL is the same thing as being in RL, and the feelings they have here are genuine feelings. If they fell like they are in love, those are real feelings of love. If they get in a fight, those can be real feelings.

2) Separation of SL and RL is more important to me that some. While I will share details of my real life with my roleplay family and close friends, I do filter things a little for privacy and safety reasons. I may even say what part of the world I"m in, but might keep what region of that country close to my chest. Again though, for some people, SL is an extension of RL, so they might not feel that same sense of privacy. What's important is that we all learn to respect what others are willing to share. Your family might be willing to be open about their real lives, but they should respect if you aren't. If you don't want to talk about RL and want SL to be a game, the people you interact with should respect that.

3) Again, everyone comes to SL for a different reason. It may well be the case that there really isn't an RL for someone spending a lot of time in SL. That's not a bad thing though. That might be their relationship. You shouldn't feel pressured to make that same kind of commitment though unless that's something you want to do.

As for your comment about not wanting to ask questions about the roleplay, don't worry about it. You have two outcomes here. They will either be happy to help explain things, perhaps not realizing what they are doing and how that could be confusing. Or they could get mad. But if they are going to get mad at you for wanting to learn more about them and how they play, as those really people you want to spend time around?

I hope that helps, and I hope you feel more comfortable with things one way or the other. Roleplaying in SL can be a lot of fun, as is making really close friends.

On 11/17/2018 at 2:32 PM, IvyLarae said:

-Firstly, It really irks me when people refer to Second Life as a game, when in order for something to be a game there would need to be an objective, or objectives in place, that you would need to complete. In Pet Rescue Saga it's getting all the pets to the bottom in a set amount of moves, In Fortnite, the objective is to be the last surviving player and so forth. Although there are games like Cards HUmanity, Greedy, etc in Second Life, SL itself is not a game, it's a virtual platform to create, talk with other people, take pictures and be whomever you wish to be, whether it be yourself, a furrie, anime girl, even a brony if you want

And it really irks me when people start splitting hairs and soapbox like this. Just because SL doesn't have quests, a level system, or NPCs doesn't mean it's not a game. It's a sandbox video game. It has a game engine. It operates like a video game. It's not 3D Facebook or 3D IRC. It's not a chatroom. It's a video game, and I absolutely hate when people get on their soapbox like this and try to pretend that they're better than other people who play video games. This is why people make fun of SL and this is why people get turned away from it; everyone tries to be all high-concept and it drive away casual players who just can't be bothered to deal with that.

So if it irks you that I or the OP call SL a game, then be irked. You're allowed to be irked by that. But for a lot of people, SL is a game, so trying to cut people down for calling it that doesn't make things any better for anyone.

Edited by HarrisonMcKenzie
  • Like 2
  • Thanks 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 hours ago, HarrisonMcKenzie said:

Just because SL doesn't have quests, a level system, or NPCs doesn't mean it's not a game.

SL is not and never has been a game of any kind. It is a creative platform and has been since 2003. It is a 3d virtual world, not a video game.

If someone turns away from SL, it isn't because someone else informed them that SL is not, never has been and never will be a game, that is on the person who leaves SL, not the person who told the truth.

The rest of what you said about it is hogwash.

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Selene Gregoire said:

SL is not and never has been a game of any kind. It is a creative platform and has been since 2003. It is a 3d virtual world, not a video game.

If someone turns away from SL, it isn't because someone else informed them that SL is not, never has been and never will be a game, that is on the person who leaves SL, not the person who told the truth.

The rest of what you said about it is hogwash.

Enjoy your soapbox. I'm going to go back to playing SL and making it accessible and understandable for those new to it.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Can't we just stop this silly argument once and for all? SL is both a game nad no game at once. It is what you make of it. For some it's this - for some it's the other. 9_9

Edited by Fionalein
  • Like 3
  • Thanks 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
26 minutes ago, Fionalein said:

Can't we just stop this silly argument once and for all? SL is both a game nad no game at once. It is what you make of it. For some it's this - for some it's the other. 9_9

It’s like Scheoedinger’s cat!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 11/27/2018 at 3:46 AM, HarrisonMcKenzie said:

And it really irks me when people start splitting hairs and soapbox like this. Just because SL doesn't have quests, a level system, or NPCs doesn't mean it's not a game. It's a sandbox video game. It has a game engine. It operates like a video game. It's not 3D Facebook or 3D IRC. It's not a chatroom. It's a video game, and I absolutely hate when people get on their soapbox like this and try to pretend that they're better than other people who play video games. This is why people make fun of SL and this is why people get turned away from it; everyone tries to be all high-concept and it drive away casual players who just can't be bothered to deal with that.

So if it irks you that I or the OP call SL a game, then be irked. You're allowed to be irked by that. But for a lot of people, SL is a game, so trying to cut people down for calling it that doesn't make things any better for anyone.

I'm just gonna leave this here facts>feelings, 100% ✌

Capture+_2018-11-28-07-39-56.png

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×