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Forum becoming more negative?


Annabell Wandsworth
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1 hour ago, Luna Bliss said:

I would ask, how do you determine who is being "too sensitive"? Why should you be the judge of that?

If someone’s response seems out of proportion to what was said, that can be seen as “sensitive”. But we don’t know if there are language barriers, the person is having a bad day, or if they are somehow feeling attacked. We can’t know, we are not them.

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2 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

lol I had this one cat that would not behave! I would scream at her to stop shredding up the couch and she paid no mind.

But I had this one little guy who would actually slump down and look dejected if I raised my voice even a teeny bit to correct him, or even say 'no'. So I'd just gently detour him from some destructive behavior as he couldn't seem to take it.

You are not a nice pet owner... Do you really think screaming at an animal will get them to understand you? If a 12 ft polar bear stood up and roared in your face, what would you do? I would hope you were wearing your brown pants. 

Your pets shouldn't have to "take it" from you. You are their surrogate parent. Most people would flip if they saw an adult screaming at a child. Why do you think its ok to do to a pet. Talk about an abuse of power.. 

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1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

You are not a nice pet owner... Do you really think screaming at an animal will get them to understand you? If a 12 ft polar bear stood up and roared in your face, what would you do? I would hope you were wearing your brown pants. 

Your pets shouldn't have to "take it" from you. You are their surrogate parent. Most people would flip if they saw an adult screaming at a child. Why do you think its ok to do to a pet. Talk about an abuse of power.. 

You're being silly, Drake.

I have 4 furbabies, siblings, and they are all different.
Some kitties need a screaming 'no' to make them stop shredding a sofa, peeing on a bed, or inflicting major teeth damage on their sibling, while other kitties can't take even the smallest sort of disapproval -- they really can't 'take it' (any sort of disapproval) at all, and so best to just distract them from the destructive behavior.

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lol that reminds me of when I discovered my VR headset had a mic.

I was in some kind of chat place, hearing that familiar scratching and howling from a kitty-fight in RL, and I screamed "noooooooo….Fluffy nooooooo" (as 'Fluffy' is always the one who causes the trouble). Then these other people @ the chat started teasing me by screaming "FLUUUUFFFFFY FLUUUUFFFFY".  I was so embarrassed and had no idea anybody could hear me in VR until then..

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13 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

You're being silly, Drake.

I have 4 furbabies, siblings, and they are all different.
Some kitties need a screaming 'no' to make them stop shredding a sofa, peeing on a bed, or inflicting major teeth damage on their sibling, while other kitties can't take even the smallest sort of disapproval -- they really can't 'take it' (any sort of disapproval) at all, and so best to just distract them from the destructive behavior.

I have had pets since  was born, of all sorts. NEVER have i screamed at any of them. Bad pet owner. Again, you pets should never have to take any sort of yelling. 

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1 minute ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

I have had pets since  was born, of all sorts. NEVER have i screamed at any of them. Bad pet owner. Again, you pets should never have to take any sort of yelling. 

I have the most spoiled kitties this side of the Mississippi. They get loads of attention, a catio so they can enjoy the outdoors without encountering raccoons, and even get organic pet food and bottled water..lol.

Maybe you imagine 'scream' to be more violent than I do...it's really just a raised voice...a raised voice for ME is screaming, as I'm pretty mellow.. …..FLUFFY NOOOOOOOOOOO.

 

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4 minutes ago, Madelaine McMasters said:
7 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

I have the most spoiled kitties this side of the Mississippi.

Earth is a sphere. Everything is on this side of the Mississippi

You are totally accurate. They are the most spoiled kitties on the planet -- maybe even in the Universe!

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Thank you for showcasing why I am so blunt most of the time. 

Now, you can stop pretending to understand what I've written so far and inserting your own thoughts, feelings and issues into my words. 

Have a pleasant day and enjoy the attention of the forum White Knight. 

Edited by Solar Legion
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4 minutes ago, Love Zhaoying said:

Luna, not sure if maybe they’re just trolling now.

Thanks, Love.

Yes I started to figure that out. Seems some didn't like me telling Callum he was abusing power, and so Drake tried to start something up with me along those lines.

If we're going to have an argument I wish some intelligent trolls would come along....this is way too boring..

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42 minutes ago, Luna Bliss said:

Thanks, Love.

Yes I started to figure that out. Seems some didn't like me telling Callum he was abusing power, and so Drake tried to start something up with me along those lines.

If we're going to have an argument I wish some intelligent trolls would come along....this is way too boring..

Actually, if you look at the conversation over the last couple pages objectively, you'll find loads of intelligence.  The problem is, we, humans, don't like looking at things objectively, especially when we want to be right or believe we are right and everyone else is wrong, lol.  We all do it, not a knock on you, or anyone else, it's just human nature.

Someone got on you about your idea of dealing with a problem pet and whether or not that is an abuse of power. But earlier, you got on someone else about the very same thing, except it was two people, and not a person and an animal. While the situations are not identical, they share more similarities than differences...and you have to be objective to see that.

Let me break it down a bit...

Person A says something, rather blunt, that person B does not like.  Person B is, temporarily or otherwise, feeling sensitive about what was said(and it matters not what, or even why). Person C says to person A-"what gives you the right to be so blunt, just because you damn well please? Why does your desire to be blunt trump person B's feelings?"(or something of that nature. Person A....."dafuq?"(I'm paraphrasing ? )...long conversation about necessary bluntness ensues..neither party agrees..eventually disagreement gets ignored.

Now later in conversation, person C admits that person C chooses to admonish in a blunt and direct manner, simply because person C thinks he/she should be able to do so, and will justify said bluntness because "it's necessary"...and everyone else reading said conversation...."dafuq?"..

That about sums it up, lol. I'm not going to discuss who is right, who is wrong, or anything like that (the answer is....both), but, if you sit back and objectively read the last couple pages of discourse, you'll find a lot of..."dafuq", moments. Or, at least I did, even in my own posts...and while I do not, in any way, shape, or form, want to attribute them to someone being "sensitive", or anything else like that, because it's quite likely to go over like a bag of bricks on a slowly deflating inflatable raft (ie, it may well insult someone, and that's not my goal)...I think it entirely may be part of the cause. I'm not judging said sensitivity, or even saying it's not warranted...just saying, it's there..and that when we have it, when we feel it, when we experience it, we really, really, really, shouldn't(can't, actually, but, whatever) expect the world to adapt to our sensitivities, but not be willing to do the same(adapt our sensitivities, or selves even) FOR the rest of the world.

Clear as mud?

Yeah, so are most of the posts on the last couple pages lmao 

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13 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

I didn't imply that fire is everywhere. You mistakenly infered it, and you drew the wrong conclusion, because avoiding groups/communities where there is sometimes fire, does not mean isolation. It just means avoiding those groups/communities where there is sometimes fire. It's easy enough to understand.

I don't consider that misrepresenting people's words to be a kindness.

I'm sorry I was unkind. If you felt it that way then I didn't respond in an appropriate way, and therefore I failed at what I was trying to accomplish. I acknowledge it, accept and will learn from it. 

I also apologize to Solar Legions too ( although he probably doesn't feel he needs it, I give it  anyway). Advice given kindly and  firmly,  such as was described earlier is often helpful,. Cruel to be kind in the right measure, as long as this is the intention.

Thank you Luna, I love you ?

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On 9/16/2018 at 10:34 AM, Luna Bliss said:

I hope that's the case.

It's the supreme court turning so conservative that has me thinking it will go on a long while though..

It's the fact that a conservative supreme court will make decisions based on LAW, and not legislate from the bench,  that has "progressives" so upset

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16 hours ago, Luna Bliss said:

feeling that your right to be 'direct' trumps the rights of someone hurting).
So yes, I feel angry when I see abuses of power.
I'm not sure, though, that you understand you have more power in such a situation (when another is hurting), and so I'm not that angry, and I don't think less of you.

^ this

and the most disappointing part of it, is that the power comes from having like minded people backing you up, and that's when you get a gang up.

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7 minutes ago, Rya Nitely said:

^ this

and the most disappointing part of it, is that the power comes from having like minded people backing you up, and that's when you get a gang up.

and you expect everybody who doesn't agree with you to convert to your opinion, and everything else is bad, gang and abusers?

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19 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

It's not really 'same old'. This part of the thread is about kindness, and, although it does crop up once in a rare while, I don't think it can be described as 'same old'.

What is 'same old' is people infering things wrongly from what other people write.

Phil, I accept that I misunderstood you, but please allow me to say this without offending you again.

“pretty regular mix of humanity” and

“As a community, we are what we are. If a community of people is unappealing, then the best thing to do is opt out of it

A ‘pretty regular mix of humanity’ would be found everywhere, creating ‘Little Fires Everywhere’ (a good book that has a very good example of bullying, and how one little girl tries to defend the victim, when nobody else does, and she gets blamed - typical).

Anyone who opts out of a forum of a pretty regular mix of humanity, because they can’t take the heat, would most likely be opting out of other social groups and communities.

I isolated myself to the point where I couldn't go to work. There are many people who do, because these fires are everywhere. These loners will often be sitting in front of their computers, and they will look for company there...and get burnt.

People who just don't see and understand it, it's simply because you don't experience it yourself. And that is why mental health awareness is so important.

People can change, we've seen it happen in our society over and over again - through education and awareness. It has happened at my work. The bullies don't get support anymore, and so they stop.

Stop supporting bullies, call them out on it, don't ignore it, don't defend it - make the world a better place.

 

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