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harassed verbally by owner of a public spot


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6 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

Lots of thinking here--some helpful, some that made me laugh....I will always speak out about personal harassment no matter whether sl or rl.  I removed the info from my profile....and am reminded sadly that even in game--people can be cruel when hidden behind an avatar or social medial  Thank you all--wish you well!

Then why is the statement Klytyna was referring to still there?

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1 hour ago, Callum Meriman said:

this doesn't mean you can rez a sex bed on the landing zone and shout out sexual encouragement to your husband of the day as he learns to control his L$1 boybits and operate the poses at the same time.

 

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1 hour ago, Callum Meriman said:

Won't work, for the very reason I highlighted. I list my club in search, I'm not going to be online 24 hours a day to be sweet and wonderful towards people who break my rules.

Right, that's why I wrote the part you highlighted, and reined-in the simple Search listing idea to merely constraining what access controls can be applied -- usually by accident -- to the parcel (scripted security notwithstanding).

I was thinking about the fact that SL has been a proving ground for what does and doesn't work in making a virtual world an appealing platform for social interaction. I've always thought the Lab underestimates the commercial value of its hard-won corporate knowledge about how to manage a platform in which customers have tools to create "community" which in turn aids long-term retention. 

For example, the curated Destination Guide is one way to match visitor expectations with what's actually on offer; if for example a venue only welcomes female avatars, it darn well better say that in the description or be delisted from the Guide.

Besides the Destination Guide, even basic Search categories -- especially "Newcomer Friendly" -- might come with some suggested guidelines for parcel settings, where we residents come up with those guidelines. For example, IHMO, "Newcomer Friendly" parcels should typically:

  • Allow everyone to fly
  • Allow everyone to run scripts
  • Enable voice
  • Not permit pushing, and
  • Not enable damage (be "Safe")
  • Not restrict access to PIOF
  • Not sell passes for access

mostly because other settings are apt to confuse newbies. Such recommendations wouldn't be automatically enforced, just a list that could be used to educate those landowners who may not be experts on land (or on newcomers); hence, these "best practices" guidelines could extend beyond mere parcel settings as long as they're broadly agreed to by folks with expertise relevant to the Search category.

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13 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

I was tp'd in by my date to a place for dancing---i was contacted by someone i did not know and believe now it was the owner of the public spot.

She/he was verbally abusive, called me names and so on.

They banned me and then I was contacted by a second person from the same spot who did the same thing.  The first person also continued.  I saved the entire conversation.  I reported to Lindens under abuse filing for all the good it can do.

I have been here over 12 years and not ever treated that badly by supposed owners.

 

Thoughts on what I can do??  I believe not only was this abusive--it was biased and horribly inappropriate

 

Thanks!

 

You've done everything you can do..

You reported them..

if you haven't ignored them..That's another thing you can do..There is really no other course of action available..

Just ride out the anger until it passes and move on..

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4 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

No wonder there was friction between you. They could hardly come in dressed and naked, could they? Some rules can be just too confusing for the rest of us :D

loll, not confusing when you use the whole sentence instead of part of it :P 

But, really, the rules were spelled out, especially regarding dress...in that they required clothing, and said clothing must cover all bits too, and couldn't be completely and utterly offensive to me or other visitors. For some people, mostly sheer pasties and a dental floss sized thong is and should be considered acceptable dress anywhere and everywhere, I happen to disagree with said people, at least as it pertains to land I'm paying for anyway :P 

 

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14 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

I was tp'd in by my date to a place for dancing---i was contacted by someone i did not know and believe now it was the owner of the public spot.

She/he was verbally abusive, called me names and so on.

They banned me and then I was contacted by a second person from the same spot who did the same thing.  The first person also continued.  I saved the entire conversation.  I reported to Lindens under abuse filing for all the good it can do.

I have been here over 12 years and not ever treated that badly by supposed owners.

 

Thoughts on what I can do??  I believe not only was this abusive--it was biased and horribly inappropriate

 

Thanks!

 

Thoughts? Grow thicker skin and quit whining.

Edit: Damnit, I see that Klytyna beat me to it.

Edited by Bradford Mint
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2 hours ago, Phil Deakins said:

I didn't see the profile earlier, and I don't see Klytyna's posts, but could it be that the profile had more details earlier, and it's them that have been removed and replaced with "ask me if you have questions"?

I can see Klytynas post and according to that (I didn't checked the profile earlier/came too late into the thread) it contained a passage of name & shame, where the place was named + something along the lines of being treated badly there and that anyone interested should feel free to ask about it.

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8 minutes ago, Syo Emerald said:

I can see Klytynas post and according to that (I didn't checked the profile earlier/came too late into the thread) it contained a passage of name & shame, where the place was named + something along the lines of being treated badly there and that anyone interested should feel free to ask about it.

As is almost always the case with these posts, the OP is being coy in her request for advice. What she really wants is vindication, and revenge on the sim owner. 

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13 minutes ago, Pamela Galli said:

As is almost always the case with these posts, the OP is being coy in her request for advice. What she really wants is vindication, and revenge on the sim owner. 

That kind of thing usually end up like that old saying of anger..

“Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.”

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24 minutes ago, Pamela Galli said:

As is almost always the case with these posts, the OP is being coy in her request for advice. What she really wants is vindication, and revenge on the sim owner. 

I remember one case from a long time ago. A similar story... until the sim owner arrived, lured into the forum by the drama the OP had been cultivating inworld.

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15 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

I was tp'd in by my date to a place for dancing---i was contacted by someone i did not know and believe now it was the owner of the public spot.

She/he was verbally abusive, called me names and so on.

They banned me and then I was contacted by a second person from the same spot who did the same thing.  The first person also continued.  I saved the entire conversation.  I reported to Lindens under abuse filing for all the good it can do.

I have been here over 12 years and not ever treated that badly by supposed owners.

Thoughts on what I can do??  I believe not only was this abusive--it was biased and horribly inappropriate

Thanks!

 

So, they just IMed you out of the blue and attacked? For no reason? You didn't respond to them with any vitriol? 

10 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

agreed my mistake was somehow missing their rules and inquiring who the person was talking to me---live and learn--and no i had not been there before nor will i go again--thank you for your thoughtful reply

What rule did you break and how did you respond to their telling you to follow it? It sounds to me like they called you on it and you got uppity. I have yet to come across a sim/club/store owner that attacked unless entitlement attitude was invoked. 

10 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

truly i know this is a game--and can laugh at your reply---yet the ability to call people names freely here and in rl still is  painful so thanks for the laugh

No, it's not a game. Perhaps if more people thought of it as a virtual world with real people in it, situations like this wouldn't happen. If you walked into McDonalds topless they would ask you to either put one on or leave. If you got uppity they would either call the cops or get loud. Sounds like you got the second option from this owner. Try following the rules.

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2 hours ago, Syo Emerald said:

I can see Klytynas post and according to that (I didn't checked the profile earlier/came too late into the thread) it contained a passage of name & shame, where the place was named + something along the lines of being treated badly there and that anyone interested should feel free to ask about it.

 

I suppose it might have said more, but the profile still has a 'name & shame' comment there.

image.png.0103299daab1661c3840552a545b8196.png

Edited by LittleMe Jewell
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1 hour ago, Syo Emerald said:

I can see Klytynas post and according to that (I didn't checked the profile earlier/came too late into the thread) it contained a passage of name & shame, where the place was named + something along the lines of being treated badly there and that anyone interested should feel free to ask about it.

That's what it pretty much said when I looked, as can be seen in the pic above - after it was said to have been removed.

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Jeez OP, what'd you do? Land on their head? (for those unaware: people (read: a lot) get their panties in a wad when you touch them - and they're the ones clogging the landing area)

There really isn't that much you can do I mean besides unleash the Kraken and tear into them the way they did you. But all that may do is get you AR'd with LL taking their side.

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18 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

I was tp'd in by my date to a place for dancing---i was contacted by someone i did not know and believe now it was the owner of the public spot.

She/he was verbally abusive, called me names and so on.

They banned me and then I was contacted by a second person from the same spot who did the same thing.  The first person also continued.  I saved the entire conversation.  I reported to Lindens under abuse filing for all the good it can do.

I have been here over 12 years and not ever treated that badly by supposed owners.

 

Thoughts on what I can do??  I believe not only was this abusive--it was biased and horribly inappropriate

 

Thanks!

 

There always are two sides to every story and you're describing only one of them. Even with all the perpetual angst in SL, most people don;t go berating others unless they feel (rightly or wrongly) that they have a reason.

With that said, you've already done about all you can do: file an AR. Good luck with that. 

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4 hours ago, Laoise Rumsford said:

Jeez OP, what'd you do? Land on their head? (for those unaware: people (read: a lot) get their panties in a wad when you touch them - and they're the ones clogging the landing area)

There really isn't that much you can do I mean besides unleash the Kraken and tear into them the way they did you. But all that may do is get you AR'd with LL taking their side.

According to the sim owner she was walking around sans panties with her nether parts on display for all  to see in a micro skirt. When asked to put some on or change by the sim manager she got angry and verbal. How she missed the rules is beyond me, i went there and there is a large sign with them at the landing point.. 

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13 minutes ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

According to the sim owner she was walking around sans panties with her nether parts on display for all  to see in a micro skirt. When asked to put some on or change by the sim manager she got angry and verbal. How she missed the rules is beyond me, i went there and there is a large sign with them at the landing point.. 

I suspected the other side of the story was along these lines.

I find it amazing how people are 'wronged' and then come post about it and always frame the story to make themselves into some kind of victim. Except for unprovoked physical harm, all "victims" are whiners, the way I see it. You can be the victim hoping for sympathy (which doesn't do anything for you, by the way, about as much as any apology does) OR you can chalk it up to experience, which is what you got when you didn't get what you wanted.

To which I can only say is: If you're a "victim" in SL of ANYTHING, then MAN-THE-F*C*-UP and move-on. (Yes, you ladies, too). Bahahaha

/me breaks out her micro-violin and begins playing the ever-popular "Boo-hoo for Snowflakes" theme song.

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2 minutes ago, Alyona Su said:

I suspected the other side of the story was along these lines.

I find it amazing how people are 'wronged' and then come post about it and always frame the story to make themselves into some kind of victim. Except for unprovoked physical harm, all "victims" are whiners, the way I see it. You can be the victim hoping for sympathy (which doesn't do anything for you, by the way, about as much as any apology does) OR you can chalk it up to experience, which is what you got when you didn't get what you wanted.

To which I can only say is: If you're a "victim" in SL of ANYTHING, then MAN-THE-F*C*-UP and move-on. (Yes, you ladies, too). Bahahaha

/me breaks out her micro-violin and begins playing the ever-popular "Boo-hoo for Snowflakes" theme song.

When I get told I'm not suitably attired, I just shrug and leave.

As it's been said over and over, their sim, their rules.

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1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

According to the sim owner she was walking around sans panties with her nether parts on display for all  to see in a micro skirt. When asked to put some on or change by the sim manager she got angry and verbal. How she missed the rules is beyond me, i went there and there is a large sign with them at the landing point.. 

Lmao, why does this not surprise me

It's always the person that tells you to dress more appropriately that is "wrong" and "biased" in these situations...

Some people, I swear.....why is dressing appropriately for the place you're at such a difficult concept for some people?

Edited by Tari Landar
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Slightly in her defense, and very slightly, she did say she was tped in and that may have had her miss the sign at the main tp point.  However, once contacted by the owners or someone working there to dress more appropriately,  she should have just put some panties on.  

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8 minutes ago, Sandy Schnook said:

Slightly in her defense, and very slightly, she did say she was tped in and that may have had her miss the sign at the main tp point.  However, once contacted by the owners or someone working there to dress more appropriately,  she should have just put some panties on.  

22 hours ago, Cerulean Piek said:

I was tp'd in by my date to a place for dancing

Sandy got it first.

This was interesting thread, need to remember to find rules always and read them first. It's so boring to read them...if on some notecard with waalls of teext.  :/

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1 hour ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

According to the sim owner she was walking around sans panties with her nether parts on display for all  to see in a micro skirt. When asked to put some on or change by the sim manager she got angry and verbal. How she missed the rules is beyond me, i went there and there is a large sign with them at the landing point.. 

LMAO. I see.

 

In that case, OP, suck it up and learn how to wear panties when told to. ^.^

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