flintlock2008 9 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 This is taking a lot of emotional energy to write - I am, quite literally, a broken man at present - but please hear my tale... I met Xoe on SL and fell in love straight away. She was everything any man could want in a woman - considerate, kind, patient and loving, and very beautiful - both in RL and SL...I had no doubt (and still have no doubt, despite the catastrophe of last weekend) that this is the only woman for me. A match made in Heaven, as it were. How lucky can one be to find that special person, among the billions on Earth? And how unlucky to have that special person snatched away by a disaster foul and crude... After a year or so of exploring SL together, sometimes for up to 16 hours a day, we decided to partner. Our wedding day was set for 6pm SLT on Friday 29 June. A great deal of planning went into this - we investigated over 80 sims to find the ideal venue, and spent a meticulous amount of time and money on sourcing the best wedding gear on SL marketplace, from clothes to decorations and even prim food. A live singer was hired; upwards of 30 guests invited; no expense was spared. Unfortunately, on Friday afternoon, I started to feel a little ill - nothing major, just a slight tummy upset. Nothing that could put me off marrying Xoe on SL. I cleared my cache several times and even moved all my video and audio files off the PC, to ensure there was no lag. We were half way through the ceremony - on mic - and the ache in my stomach turned to a full-blown storm. I desperately needed to go to the toilet - but what could I do, mid-ceremony? Maybe I could have urinated in time - but I doubted I could properly void my bowels and clean my backside in time for the wedding vows. So I held on...even though by now I was sweating and stamping my feet against the floor. The wedding official asked me to recite my vows. I was about to speak when, suddenly...I let rip the most cacophonous fart my anus has ever uttered. All on the sim went quiet. I saw someone type 'Did he just fart? LOL'. I was overcome with grief and shame. Not only had I farted - I had followed through, and the back legs of my beige chinos were now an unholy shade of creosote-brown. Xoe logged off and later unpartnered me. In fact, she unpartnered me instantly, though I only found out three hours later - after I had put my chinos and underwear into a garbage bag and scrubbed my carpet for stains. She will now not return my IMs, and I feel myself lonely, rejected and overcome by the burning shame of being the only man to have defecated in his own pants at his virtual wedding ceremony. Or am I? Has this ever happened to anyone else? 9 Link to post Share on other sites
Madelaine McMasters 25,171 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 Sounds like your sweetie "dodged a bullet". 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cindy Evanier 12,800 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 I wish I hadn't read this while eating my lunch 1 4 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Pamela Galli 5,776 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 Not the first fake post like this, presumably from the same person. 8 Link to post Share on other sites
Ceka Cianci 7,412 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 1 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Madelaine McMasters 25,171 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 12 minutes ago, Pamela Galli said: Not the first fake post like this, presumably from the same person. Yep. I suppose repetitive behavior comes in many forms. For me, it's constantly opening the pantry door with the hope that something delicious will magically appear. 2 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Coby Foden 15,853 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 Fake story from 8 days old account. We've seen similar story already earlier. Nothing new. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Phorumities 870 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 1 hour ago, flintlock2008 said: This is taking a lot of emotional energy to write - I am, quite literally, a broken man at present - but please hear my tale... I met Xoe on SL and fell in love straight away. She was everything any man could want in a woman - considerate, kind, patient and loving, and very beautiful - both in RL and SL...I had no doubt (and still have no doubt, despite the catastrophe of last weekend) that this is the only woman for me. A match made in Heaven, as it were. How lucky can one be to find that special person, among the billions on Earth? And how unlucky to have that special person snatched away by a disaster foul and crude... After a year or so of exploring SL together, sometimes for up to 16 hours a day, we decided to partner. Our wedding day was set for 6pm SLT on Friday 29 June. A great deal of planning went into this - we investigated over 80 sims to find the ideal venue, and spent a meticulous amount of time and money on sourcing the best wedding gear on SL marketplace, from clothes to decorations and even prim food. A live singer was hired; upwards of 30 guests invited; no expense was spared. Unfortunately, on Friday afternoon, I started to feel a little ill - nothing major, just a slight tummy upset. Nothing that could put me off marrying Xoe on SL. I cleared my cache several times and even moved all my video and audio files off the PC, to ensure there was no lag. We were half way through the ceremony - on mic - and the ache in my stomach turned to a full-blown storm. I desperately needed to go to the toilet - but what could I do, mid-ceremony? Maybe I could have urinated in time - but I doubted I could properly void my bowels and clean my backside in time for the wedding vows. So I held on...even though by now I was sweating and stamping my feet against the floor. The wedding official asked me to recite my vows. I was about to speak when, suddenly...I let rip the most cacophonous fart my anus has ever uttered. All on the sim went quiet. I saw someone type 'Did he just fart? LOL'. I was overcome with grief and shame. Not only had I farted - I had followed through, and the back legs of my beige chinos were now an unholy shade of creosote-brown. Xoe logged off and later unpartnered me. In fact, she unpartnered me instantly, though I only found out three hours later - after I had put my chinos and underwear into a garbage bag and scrubbed my carpet for stains. She will now not return my IMs, and I feel myself lonely, rejected and overcome by the burning shame of being the only man to have defecated in his own pants at his virtual wedding ceremony. Or am I? Has this ever happened to anyone else? omfg thats hysterical thank you 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alwin Alcott 11,398 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 2 minutes ago, Phorumities said: omfg thats hysterical thank you no... poster IS hysterical... and a possible source to lots of study for a psychology/psychiatry professional but he/she has what he/she wants... attention 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LittleMe Jewell 36,677 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 Of course it is all fake, but I still give him props for having a comedic side and providing a morning chuckle. 9 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ForrestChild 5,501 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 If I remember correctly, last time it was some guy at a club lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ceka Cianci 7,412 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 The OP has me looking for goofy memes now! \o/ Not that I really needed an excuse 3 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Syo Emerald 5,831 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 I've seen that story before. Link to post Share on other sites
Jules Catlyn 874 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 It was entertaining Link to post Share on other sites
LittleMe Jewell 36,677 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 21 minutes ago, ForrestChild said: If I remember correctly, last time it was some guy at a club lol 6 minutes ago, Syo Emerald said: I've seen that story before. 1 3 Link to post Share on other sites
LittleMe Jewell 36,677 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 And here: https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/361614-sl-and-the-toilet-catastrophe/?tab=comments#comment-1576670 And here: https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/344927-a-sick-disturbing-but-true-tale/?tab=comments#comment-1114853 And here: https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/288157-sl-and-my-toilet-mishap/?tab=comments#comment-1502044 Probably more, but I got tired of looking. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Bree Giffen 2,750 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 *wonders if OP has my pooper attachment* 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Janet Voxel 5,482 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 I started laughing at “16 hrs a day”. I love satirical humor. Link to post Share on other sites
Dillon Levenque 1,701 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 1 hour ago, Ceka Cianci said: The OP has me looking for goofy memes now! \o/ Not that I really needed an excuse PERFECT!! :-) Link to post Share on other sites
Ziggy Starsmith 1,722 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 LMAO Fake or not, I LOVED that story hahahahah 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LittleMe Jewell 36,677 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 For further amusement, along the same line, reviews on Amazon for Sugar Free Gummy Bears:https://www.amazon.com/Haribo-SUGAR-Classic-Gummi-Bears/product-reviews/B006J1FBLM 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Parhelion Palou 2,070 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 29 minutes ago, LittleMe Jewell said: For further amusement, along the same line, reviews on Amazon for Sugar Free Gummy Bears:https://www.amazon.com/Haribo-SUGAR-Classic-Gummi-Bears/product-reviews/B006J1FBLM I've read those before. They're infinitely better than the OP's story. Link to post Share on other sites
Ziggy Starsmith 1,722 Posted July 2, 2018 Share Posted July 2, 2018 (edited) Why is it that women are revolted by this humor but men find it the absolute height of comedic delights? lol These episodes are best endured with a good book and your reading glasses because it can be a long, hard ride in hell. Problem is getting your supplies in time before accidents occur :-) Edited July 2, 2018 by Ziggy Starsmith Link to post Share on other sites
Stephanie Misfit 736 Posted July 3, 2018 Share Posted July 3, 2018 The repeated postings of similar tales from new accounts makes me suspect that this is a man who is trying to force others to read his fetishistic fantasies. But I am cynical. 2 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ceka Cianci 7,412 Posted July 3, 2018 Share Posted July 3, 2018 13 hours ago, Ziggy Starsmith said: Why is it that women are revolted by this humor but men find it the absolute height of comedic delights? lol These episodes are best endured with a good book and your reading glasses because it can be a long, hard ride in hell. Problem is getting your supplies in time before accidents occur :-) It's probably something to do with having our heads being forced under covers trapped in stench, while laughter from outside increases.. The ones I really hate besides the covers one is,The Sneak attack ones..When my husband starts to sort of laugh and I'm wondering what so funny..Then it's just this horrible smell and then he bursts out laughing.. I'm just curious why men are so fascinated by their farts and other noises they can make with their body.. I ask my husband this and he just say's,I don't know..It's just funny.. 1 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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