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Would you inform the partner?


Orwar
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I was down at a store today, just having a look at a few things, when someone walks up to me and sends me an IM: 'Hey, wanna have some fun? ;)' - being me, I of course open the profile to see what person this is, and apart from a fairly blank profile which tells me nothing about her, there is a partner and a couple of pics dedicated to him, with hearts and airy meme quotes about him being the greatest thing in her life. I also check his profile, and he has similar picks of her, on top of an otherwise fairly ordinary profile.

I turned her down, simply saying that I'm not interested due to her partnership. 

But the moral question is, do I tell him? I know I can't take a screenshot of the IM she sent me and give him hard proof due to Linden Lab's ToA. On the one hand it's hardly my business, and who knows - he might well be in on it. On the other hand, if it were my partner picking up strangers in a store, I would very much like to be made aware of it so that I could confront her about it.

Would you let him know?

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No. Keep your life, and their life, drama-free by not getting involved in the relationships of others. You've no idea what arrangements they have. You've no idea what he's like. The possible negative repercussions of your actions far outweigh any positive repercussions (really, let's face it, there's no positives to come from this regardless of outcome... one or both of them will be annoyed at someone and it is highly likely that person will be you). 

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^^^ what Jae says.  Stay away from it.  They could have a personal arrangement or it could result in drama for you.  If they aren't personal friends why would you want to get involved.  If I messaged every partner of every guy who has sent me similar IMs, my SL would be a horrible dramafest.  

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1 hour ago, nikita2004 Ashley said:

It could me a fun meant for 3 person. Haha u never know.  

Or maybe they have this fantasy they want to play out where he finds her in bed with another guy and he bursts into the room and shoots him.

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38 minutes ago, Talligurl said:

Or maybe they have this fantasy they want to play out where he finds her in bed with another guy and he bursts into the room and shoots him.

Or maybe they just want to see Orwar's butt and they're too polite to just ask.

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47 minutes ago, LexxiXhan said:

Or maybe they just want to see Orwar's butt and they're too polite to just ask.

There's a polite way to ask that? 

Looks thoughtful.

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6 hours ago, Orwar said:

I was down at a store today, just having a look at a few things, when someone walks up to me and sends me an IM: 'Hey, wanna have some fun? ;)' - being me, I of course open the profile to see what person this is, and apart from a fairly blank profile which tells me nothing about her, there is a partner and a couple of pics dedicated to him, with hearts and airy meme quotes about him being the greatest thing in her life. I also check his profile, and he has similar picks of her, on top of an otherwise fairly ordinary profile.

I turned her down, simply saying that I'm not interested due to her partnership. 

But the moral question is, do I tell him? I know I can't take a screenshot of the IM she sent me and give him hard proof due to Linden Lab's ToA. On the one hand it's hardly my business, and who knows - he might well be in on it. On the other hand, if it were my partner picking up strangers in a store, I would very much like to be made aware of it so that I could confront her about it.

Would you let him know?

Well, seeing as

1. you didn't do anything, 
2. All she did was ask
3. they may be in an open relation ship
4. He may get off on it
5. It may very well be an alt of hers just there to ward off creepers

I would leave it alone. 

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2 minutes ago, Drake1 Nightfire said:

I say, good Sir, might you be kind enough to show us all your perfectly shaped derriere? 

He said, as he saw my exterior,
because it was frankly superior,
His mind in the mire
Weighed down by desire,
As he gazed at my precious posterior.

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A LOT of couples in SL have a free relationship, at least more than I expected when I started talking to people around me more. But of course that doesn't mean it definitely is your case, but I already seen cases where the husband or the wife got a message about their partner and they didn't care. Best thing is ignore and move on.

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I believe it was already mentioned that some couples have different ways of enjoying their relationship together . I was with a man who wanted me to flirt with other men, letting him know if they were getting excited and had requested that i consider having relations to please a man so he could watch from a far. to him he said not only would it excite him but would also bring him and I closer . Unfortunately, he didnt get his request fullfilled . just wasnt my thing 

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Truthfully being if a guy came up to me asked me I will tell there partner because I have in my profile I don't flirt or bother with people that are taken or married even if its real. Just saying a loyal friend would tell you Just as in real that is how I am like a vow. .  I don't play that game I am single in both but trust is a big things with me. Some people don't real profile's its best to rest before bothering someone.Once trust is broken it can never be again.

Edited by Dreamerra
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It could be the woman is having some kind of revenge on her hubby for him not being faithful. It could also be that the husband doesn't know he is being cheated on or maybe he does know and doesn't care. Maybe he does care but is powerless to stop her. Maybe the husband and wife are the same person. So many possibilities. 

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Women in SL have this type of situation happen all the time. They’re partnered or have proclamations of love in their picks that always begin “You are my everything...” and end with “if you mess with them I’LL KILL YOU!” Or both. Yet there they are, trying to bang someone else.

 

....yeah. Not really worth it to open that can of worms.

What I usually do is point out they have a partner or a special someone and I don’t do the other woman thing. Then I wish them good luck.

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That would depend on if I'm in the mood for some drama or not!

Typically, I would ask them why are they messaging me while they are partnered, and does she know that you're doing this? Depending on the answer - I'll either block him, chew him out, or show his partner. xD >:|

If I'm partnered, I'll show him the msg and he'll usually say something(not so nice) to the guy in question. I don't keep anything from my partner, not sure if that's a good or bad thing.

Edited by Kristen Beornssen
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I wouldn't get involved. As others have said, you don't know their arrangement, you don't know who these people are, or have any ties to them. Is it worth the potential drama that could come your way as a result of this? I say, no.

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My eagerness to reply to this was evident seeing as how it took me 45 seconds to figure out how to do so (first reply ever to anything).  Anyway - I would.  But then, if I had to be honest, I'm petty like that.  Like you, I would want someone to inform me if my partner were doing such things because how else are you going to truly know their intentions?  I was out dancing with someone one night at Frank's and I got an IM from another lady from across the dance floor asking me if the man I was dancing with was my partner.  I replied no.  She then told me how he was IM'ing her, complimenting her and asking her what she was doing later so they could meet up.  Obviously I didn't care because we were just dancing.  Still rude to do that and even though he wasn't my partner, it still gave me a sense of his character.  I thanked her and made sure to let her know that I found what she did to be admirable.  What if he had been my partner?  So, yes, if I were getting hit on and saw they were involved after doing my profile creeping, I would most definitely be letting their partner know.  

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My first partner in SL turned out to be a cheating dog. He had all the lovey things in his profile as well. My first hint should have been when another woman on the sim we lived on IMed me telling me that he was hitting on her. But I believed his lies when he said it was the other way around and that she was just trying to get back at him because he refused her. Well then, not too long after, I got another IM one day from a guy that I didn't know, telling me that my guy was at this sex sim involved in the activities there. He had read his profile and thought I should know. He offered to TP me in, so I said ok... I then walked up to my partner and just looked at him without saying a word. When he finally noticed me, he logged out and never tried to contact me again. There was no way he was talking his way out of that one. I have to say, I'm glad someone did tell me so I could stop wasting my SLife on that loser. To this day, I wish I had contacted that woman and apologized for not believing her, but I've since forgotten what her name was.

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On 4/22/2018 at 1:04 AM, Orwar said:

I was down at a store today, just having a look at a few things, when someone walks up to me and sends me an IM: 'Hey, wanna have some fun? ;)' - being me, I of course open the profile to see what person this is, and apart from a fairly blank profile which tells me nothing about her, there is a partner and a couple of pics dedicated to him, with hearts and airy meme quotes about him being the greatest thing in her life. I also check his profile, and he has similar picks of her, on top of an otherwise fairly ordinary profile.

I turned her down, simply saying that I'm not interested due to her partnership. 

But the moral question is, do I tell him? I know I can't take a screenshot of the IM she sent me and give him hard proof due to Linden Lab's ToA. On the one hand it's hardly my business, and who knows - he might well be in on it. On the other hand, if it were my partner picking up strangers in a store, I would very much like to be made aware of it so that I could confront her about it.

Would you let him know?

No, I would not. Just like you said, there are various things that could be at play. Like you said, it could be that they both are ok with the other doing this. Or, perhaps their relationship is not that deep, and they are on the outs.. etc, etc... so many things could be happening. Also, in the end, it is something they will have to figure out between them. Chances are if they are cheating, they've done it before and perhaps will do it again, so it will be discovered sooner or later. I would not inform the partner. It truly is none of my business.

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