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I suck at making friends!


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offer them chocolate.  It works. :P  

 

I have very few friends in here.  Most of the ones I do have are ones that I came over with. :P  Most of the time I'm in game,  I'm either shopping or playing dress up.  

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1 minute ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

This is my SL, along with taking pictures of myself as I play dress up (though sometimes I am taking pictures of pretty places)

I've only taken a few pics, and that was months ago.  I REALLY need to learn how to do that, though.  I've got soooo many outfits.  lol

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2 minutes ago, Catrie said:

I've only taken a few pics, and that was months ago.  I REALLY need to learn how to do that, though.  I've got soooo many outfits.  lol

Practice, practice, practice.  Most of mine are pretty 'meh', but I keep working on it and occassionally I somehow manage to get something that actually looks pretty awesome.

Spend time in our 3 "look at me" threads - that will encourage you to take more pics:

https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/32549-the-vanity-thread/

https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/407584-what-are-you-doing-today-d/

https://community.secondlife.com/forums/topic/405992-how-does-your-avatar-look-today/

 

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1 minute ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Practice, practice, practice.  Most of mine are pretty 'meh', but I keep working on it and occassionally I somehow manage to get something that actually looks pretty awesome.

Spend time in our 3 "look at me" threads - that will encourage you to take more pics

Thanks for the tip.  I haven't really spent much time on the forums, until yesterday. :P  I'll definitely check those threads out.  

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  • 1 month later...
On 2/15/2018 at 5:21 PM, Harloxzz said:

The same happens to me

When I enter to the sims, they are all empty

And when I start a conversation they always end up ignoring me

I made few friends in the past but that was a long time ago and I doubt they still remember me

I think we have bad luck

 

 

I've had a little bit of that as well, but in general, people WANT to be friendly and social, that's why they're here. A few have cliques that they stick to, but it's amazing what a random IM will do!

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I must be a horrible mutant, I make friends all the times, at least one a week... now true friends is something different. You can still find them. Hop around crowded sims and chat a lot in groups that allow it... offer help if asked for and you might know the answer. Do some jokes that are funny but hurt none, you know, ... be a person they enjoy talking to.

And one last tip: Ignore all advice on how to make friends. Just be yourself is usualy enough. People who think they should analyse friendships and write advice about winning friends usualy are those that try to understand why they have none. 

Edited by Fionalein
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4 hours ago, Fionalein said:

And one last tip: Ignore all advice on how to make friends. Just be yourself is usaly enough. People who think they should analyse friendships and write advice about winning friends usualy are those that try to understand why they have none. 

You hit the nail on the head there, for me. I've been gone for eons and came back less than a week ago, and because I was alone most of the time I had the freedom to go wherever and talk to whomever. I've met some pretty interesting people and I haven't spent a day alone or bored since :)

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19 hours ago, Fionalein said:

And one last tip: Ignore all advice on how to make friends. Just be yourself is usualy enough. People who think they should analyse friendships and write advice about winning friends usualy are those that try to understand why they have none.

Consequently enough, those who "play" enough have developed the ability to slice through B.S. and can generally pick up on when you are being "fake". Choose a persona that closely goes along with who you are in R.L. so that you have less to remember. Embellish where necessary, keep R.L. details out of it, and don't work too hard. It's supposed to be fun! Be you!!!

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On 2/7/2018 at 3:18 AM, Phil Deakins said:

I don't feel that I can remove the ones I've made from the forum, even though we haven't spoken for years, simply because we sort of got to know each other here and they feel like friends. E.g. I still have Honeybear in my list but I haven't seen hide nor hair of her for years. I can't remove her though.

One spot on my friends list is permanently reserved for a person that passed away in RL. Not only that but on my.secondlife a message from her is often the first thing I see when I go there. It was one of the last things she ever said to me, a meaningless little piece of chat, that I just hadn't bothered to open up and read until after I learned of her passing. So it's been sitting there for years now, long after they removed the ability to PM people through my.secondlife...

This is also why there is a newsrack on one of my builds that is on fire, and has been since the day she passed on.

***

I'm generally not good at making friends. A brutal upbringing has made me a hardened conditioned fighter, and I don't let my guard down very easily. I'm best when I have an engaging topic to go at, but the 'small talk' in SL is an odd fit for me, and often full of references I don't know (it too me a while to figure out why so many old dues in SL kept asking me 'what's knew'... which by the way... annoys me to no end. I usually just don't respond, even though I know they are trying to be friendly). O.o

 

 

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46 minutes ago, Pussycat Catnap said:

One spot on my friends list is permanently reserved for a person that passed away in RL. Not only that but on my.secondlife a message from her is often the first thing I see when I go there. It was one of the last things she ever said to me, a meaningless little piece of chat, that I just hadn't bothered to open up and read until after I learned of her passing. So it's been sitting there for years now, long after they removed the ability to PM people through my.secondlife...

 

i am so touched....

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YOU suck at making friends? Try having a social anxiety disorder. lol. I can MAKE friends... it's the keeping them I have troubles with. I don't know how to act. I try to be myself but, I have high mania, so I drive people batty, if they do not understand my illness.

And then, I don't like to lean on, or blame my illness because that is what people are looking for.. for me to blame my illness lol.

I hope you have luck meeting people on this site though. I know many people on here that are awesome.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I've been playing SL since there was a teen sl and I've really only kept 1 person as a friend out of all those years. It didn't bother me much at the time and I stopped playing for years and then came back but now in my later 20s, I'm kinda wishing I had a good friend or two. Or get that magic IM from a stranger that starts off a solid friendship.  It seems like the only people I meet lately like going to clubs or roleplay fantasy characters and I do neither of those things or have any interests in doing them. Other than being an alt magnet, SL is somewhat lonely. I wish I knew where all the socially awkward, mellow people were at (and hope it's in quiet environment).

Edited by BloodDoll Lulu
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For many of us, even though we'd like more friends, we are very introverted by nature and thus have a hard time doing the 'friends' stuff very often.  At least for me, I find that to be true in both RL and SL.  My friendships do suffer because of it, but no matter how hard I try, I cannot make myself do people things very much.

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12 minutes ago, BloodDoll Lulu said:

 I wish I knew where all the socially awkward, mellow people were at (and hope it's in quiet environment).

Likely, all hiding in their own isolated areas.

Edited by LittleMe Jewell
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that´s absolutely true for me, too.

In RL my bf is usually enough. He´s fine though, even when we spend weeks of being together nonstop. We´ve been chatting for up to 16 hours a day before we got together so ...yeah ^^
in SL...while I like friends and having ppl over I... kinda don´t know what to do anymore. I mean yeah sure, clubbing and dancing, chatting in local and groups, BUT... photoshoots usually need planning, sex is off the boards, RP... I lack the time,..... mh.... Linden Realms ... I do that occasionally but that´s more on your own, too. I do love to attend parties at the Hangout or the weekly breakfast and I try to attend gettogethers whenever possible. 

I´m usually happy to chat inworld though^^

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4 minutes ago, Akasha Sternberg said:

I´m usually happy to chat inworld though^^

Part of my problem is that I have difficulty with casual chatting, especially one on one.  At a party or club, I can fairly easily join in on the conversation (as long as I know some of the folks), but I just can't figure out one-on-one casual talking.  In RL, my phone calls with people show this -- lots of silences.

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1 hour ago, LittleMe Jewell said:

Part of my problem is that I have difficulty with casual chatting, especially one on one.  At a party or club, I can fairly easily join in on the conversation (as long as I know some of the folks), but I just can't figure out one-on-one casual talking.  In RL, my phone calls with people show this -- lots of silences.

yeah I prefer  groupchat,too

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  • 11 months later...
50 minutes ago, Shniffx said:

I'm looking for friends feel so lonely though due to my SL job people assume I know alot of People I do not 

if you open your own topic you can  perhaps write a bit about what you like, and look for.
I think you have to realize your profile shows already a lot about you, and think many people will judge on that.

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On 2/16/2018 at 4:07 AM, Catrie said:

I've only taken a few pics, and that was months ago.  I REALLY need to learn how to do that, though.  I've got soooo many outfits.  lol

I was like, what the heck are you talking about? You make tons of great pics... then I noticed the date :)

Yay for forum necromancy...

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