Second Life is filled with petty and rude people.

[Madelaine McMasters]

19 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

Also, with all the passive aggressive shade being thrown, thank you for walking right into the point I’ve been trying to prove this whole time.*

I can't find a post I made recently (which I'll presume vaporized along with whatever thread it was in) listing five typical behaviors in rants. Stating that the thing you were ranting against was something you wanted all along was one of those behaviors. Thanking people for helping you obtain it was another. You've packed two of those into one statement. I'm not the only one to recognize this behavior, nor am I the only one to exhibit it now and then. I do recommend taking a step back to, as so many others have suggested, to consider whether you aren't the dominant reason for your inability to find the welcoming crowds you seek, or whether what we perceive as your failure to do so is precisely the fulfillment you seek.

Either way, don't expect the crowd to change its behavior unless you change yours.

Edited January 8, 2018 by Madelaine McMasters

[ChinRey]

3 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

I can also assume my kind are treated differently in online communities and other subcultures because we are deemed to only like one thing and stick to said stereotype, but I digress.

Others have already mentioned this but I think it's important:

I do not know who you are. The first time I noticed even your name was in this thread. I have absolutely no idea what "your kind" is. As far as I know, that goes for everybody who have tried to reply in this thread. You are a complete strangerr to us. Do you understand that?

Essentially you started with a sweeping statement that Second Life is filled with petty and rude people and that simply isn't true. If it's filled up at all, it's mainly by people who live their own little Second Lives and - for good or bad -  have no interest whatsoever in you or in me.

Everybody responded from their own point of view and everybody knew that your statement isn't generally true because ... well, simply because we all know lots of marvelous people in Second Life.

We can't see things from your point of view because we don't know where your point of view is. So, if you want some sympathy or understanding or help, please give us some details. Tell us a little bit about yourself and your SL experiences so far.

Or you can just use this forum to vent off some steam if you like. It's a perfectly legitimate way to use an itnernet forum and sometimes it helps. But if you do, don't complain about the replies you get.

[Jerilynn Lemon]

[Hunter Stern]

Oh I think having a discussion around a point of view is fine for anyone, but I would tread carefully once that discussion turns into a personal chat between myself and another party to which others might not be privy to. It's not very a considerate  presentation of said topic then to the rest of us who's ears (eyes) are just agape for the next kernel.

Isn't there a Community Participation Guideline which states thou shalt not create a new thread of a topic from a thread that was closed?

 Oh yeah, but this is the 'Rude' thread.

 on the matter of 'We'

We, Wii, Oui?Are you peaking French? or is that a turd in your pocket ?

[Ashlyn Voir]

2 minutes ago, Hunter Stern said:

Oh I think having a discussion around a point of view is fine for anyone, but I would tread carefully once that discussion turns into a personal chat between myself and another party to which others might not be privy to. It's not very a considerate  presentation of said topic then to the rest of us who's ears (eyes) are just agape for the next kernel.

Isn't there a Community Participation Guideline which states thou shalt not create a new thread of a topic from a thread that was closed?

 Oh yeah, but this is the 'Rude' thread.

 on the matter of 'We'

We, Wii, Oui?Are you peaking French? or is that a turd in your pocket ?

Both threads are different from each other, but what others bring up from old threads to this one—nothing to do with this one—I’ve made is out of my control. 

That being said, your humor is adorable. 

[Skell Dagger]

14 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

Also, with all the passive aggressive shade being thrown, thank you for walking right into the point I’ve been trying to prove this whole time.

You're absolutely right. There's a lot of passive-aggressive shade being thrown in this thread. Here are some examples (emphasis mine, especially on the sarcastic repetition of names , the exaggerated 'unapologetic apology' and the condescending tone of voice) that I found:

Quote

"Oh, most certainly Avaraia. Right on point. Also, Avaraia. To the latter, I suppose I could, but I am not active on the community board as many of you are. My sincere apologies, Avaraia. I had no idea I was complaining about ‘something’ all the time as you put it."

"Sure, Theresa. Sure."

"Oh no, that’s horrible, Jerilynn. In no way was my post meant to be a sign of disrespect especially towards you. I’m sincerely sorry if I have no respect from you and even more so why I’m a plague to be avoided as you say. My deepest apologies and I’ll take all the ‘advice’ here as something to completely and utterly abide by."

"Your 2004 memes are so cute."

"Of course, hun Especially considering it was years ago, Tari Landar."

"Sorry for your own misunderstanding, LittleMe Jewell."

In fact, let me fix the first line that I quoted here for you:

14 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

Also, with all the passive aggressive shade being thrown, thank you for walking right into the point I’ve been trying to prove this whole time trap that I set for you, to prove to myself that it's everyone else who is at fault and not me.

There's only one common denominator here, and it isn't "everyone else in SL".

[Phil Deakins]

10 hours ago, Qie Niangao said:

Wading back in to the furniture example. There are many reasons folks prefer modifiable furniture, and in fact it's one product category where those market forces have been pretty effective: there are relatively fewer no-mod furniture products on sale than there used to be.

My main thing about no-mod, though, is when platform changes render effectively obsolete content that could be preserved with a few updating modifications. And for a long time, furniture aged like most SL products, just looking gradually more primitive as standards improved. What you bought was more or less what you got.

Then there were a several step-function changes in SL that left existing no-mod furniture way behind. One was mesh land-impact accounting, where some old prim furniture could be salvaged by setting physics types of linkset elements to None or Convex Hull. It's not that the no-mod furniture items lost functionality* but changing expectations left behind prematurely compared to items with mod perms.

Then the same thing happened with Materials settings. And most recently, Experience-enabled temp attachment of props. After growing accustomed to such features, older furniture seems starkly primitive, not merely quaint. An unnecessary casualty of some creator's misguided ego or superstition.

To clarify, that's pretty much the exact opposite of my furniture example. I routinely lift animations from no-mod furniture and add them to modifiable stuff, often things that weren't animated at all before, with either my own or AVsitter scripts. At that point the no-mod items are disposable and that's fine, I only ever bought them for their animations. The problem I was describing, in contrast, is when folks bought no-mod furniture intending to keep using the shell too, not merely the anims, and that shell ages ungracefully and unnecessarily because mod permission was foolishly disabled.

___________________
* That's in contrast to vehicles that become undrivable when Havok updates. In that case, no-mod items are literally obsolete.

@Qie Niangao Sorry Qie. You are still my #1 poster but I can't agree with you about much of what you wrote with regard to most content. Yes there are exceptions, such as avatars, but most content doesn't need to be mod. Your argument is obsolescence, and it doesn't hold up, I'm afraid. If you want a sofa that's going to look good when you buy it in 2006, and remain looking good after new features have come in such as mesh, then you have unrealistic expectations. Like everything else, you have to move with the times and not expect what's great today to still be great in 3, 4, or 5 years time. What you pay for something today, you pay for its benefit today, and not its benefit in 3, 4 or 5 years time - unless it really does still look good, of course.

[Ashlyn Voir]

1 minute ago, Pamela Galli said:

 I have no firm basis for believing she is or is not a member of a particular minority. I do know this: when minorities in the US have their hands full putting up with so much injustice and so many indignities in RL, I have a hard time imagining a real victim pointlessly Trolling the forum. It is an insult to any people she claims to represent.

I disagree with you.

 

2 minutes ago, Skell Dagger said:

You're absolutely right. There's a lot of passive-aggressive shade being thrown in this thread. Here are some examples (emphasis mine, especially on the sarcastic repetition of names , the exaggerated 'unapologetic apology' and the condescending tone of voice) that I found:

In fact, let me fix the first line that I quoted here for you:

There's only one common denominator here, and it isn't "everyone else in SL".

And, I’m only being polite. It’s sarcastic to write names and apologize now or am I missing something? 

[Nalytha]

8 minutes ago, Skell Dagger said:

You're absolutely right. There's a lot of passive-aggressive shade being thrown in this thread. Here are some examples (emphasis mine, especially on the sarcastic repetition of names , the exaggerated 'unapologetic apology' and the condescending tone of voice) that I found:

In fact, let me fix the first line that I quoted here for you:

There's only one common denominator here, and it isn't "everyone else in SL".

Wow. You are a pro at this. No bold intended. 

[Phil Deakins]

10 hours ago, Penny Patton said:

Ok, so you either misunderstood somehow, even tho I was pretty clear in what I did say, or you are lying. Now, I don't really believe you're intentionally lying, afterall my post is right there for anyone to read and see that what you're saying isn't true, so attempting to gaslight like that just makes no sense, but I am struggling to see how you can interpret what I said in that post as being a flat "all no-mod content is broken because it is no-mod" especially after I took the time to reiterate the parts of my statement you edited out.

Don't do this, Penny. Own what you wrote. This is what you wrote:-

Meanwhile, I'm constantly seeing people complaining about problems caused entirely by the stuff they buy being no-mod, but they blame everyone but the content creator who sold them broken content because they have no idea how easy some of these problems are to fix if the content were only modifiable.

That definitely sounds like you are saying that no-mod items are broken in your opinion. The problems you rfer to are caused by "the stuff being no-mod", and your conclusion is that the stuff is broken because it's no-mod. If you meant something different then please write it more clearly.

[Tari Landar]

1 minute ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

And, I’m only being polite. It’s sarcastic to write names and apologize now or am I missing something? 

You considered what I said as being passive aggressive (which it really wasn't, I'm either passive, or aggressive, I don't like mingling the two, it's just darn confusing, to be honest). But you don't understand how others can read your words as sarcastic, or perhaps even their own version of passive aggressive shade even? I'm not being a smartass when I ask that, I am actually asking if you really do not see how your words might be perceived as sarcastic passive aggressive retorts. 

If your intent was to be polite, it is very clear that your intent was about as clear as muck. It's ok, that happens, humans arne't always the greatest at expressing what it is we really want to say, textually. But it's also super easy to clear up actual confusion too. Thus far, most of your replies read the same, utilize the same text "speech" patterns, and come across the same. I think it's a reasonable conclusion for folks to believe that they are, in fact, not sincere politeness, but actually passive aggressiveness. If everyone else is so mistaken, and everyone has mistaken your words for something they are not....clear them up. I promise, it really is easy as heck..and probably could've been done pages ago (of course that would've eliminated a lot of the banter too).

When you choose not to clear up something you perceive as a mistake on others' part, you're only going to perpetuate the belief that their opinions of your words were actually correct all along. 

Shrugs....I forsee you not having a grand a time as you could, be it sl, these forums, or anywhere else, with that kind of approach. But, what do I know, I'm not a fan of creating enemies, personally, especially when what I want is to be able to connect with other people. 

[Phil Deakins]

This is the rest of the response to your post that I had to leave earlier today.

 

12 hours ago, Penny Patton said:

I'm with Qie and Callum on this. Not all content can be previewed before you buy it, and the vast majority of content in SL is sold overscaled, senselessly costing people prims and land for no other reason than the creator's inexperience. You're also making some pretty big assumptions about where the cost of a piece of furniture comes from and why the person purchasing the furniture wanted that piece of furniture to begin with. And sure, I'd also recommend people who like to mod (or just not build senslessly oversized, throwing money away every week/month because of it) avoid no-mod furniture, but we had a discussion in this thread already about how as no-mod becomes more prevalent, the options for people who want modifiable content dwindle. That is a problem.

 To turn it around, literally every no-mod object I've seen in SL at best could have been improved simply by being modifiable, and at worst was rendered entirely unusable by being no-mod. On the other hand I have never encountered a single object in SL that would have benefitted the customer or the seller in any way from having the mod perms revoked.

Don't buy it if you can't try it to see if it suits you. It's that simple.

I don;t think I'm making any unreasonable assumptions about where the cost to the buyer is in furniture with animations. I've very experienced in it, so I don't need to make any assumptions. Example: You buy a sex bed for L$3000. Would you pay L$2000 for the bed without the animations? Of course not. Most of what you're paying is due to the animations.

Yes but that was all about avatar bodies and heads, with perhaps a smattering of clothing as well. I'm talking about the vast majority of content, not avatars.

You're a creator? Then maybe mod stuff is highly desirable for you because you can alter it to your personal desires. But most people aren't able to do that, and most people are who stuff is aimed at. The vast majority of stuff is not rendered entirely useless by being no-mod. That's a silly thing to say. Either something is usefull when it is bought or it isn't. If it is, then the vast majority of stuff remains just as useful ad-infinitum. If it isn't useful when it's bought, don't buy it. Especially don't buy things that you intend to modify to your taste unless you know that it's modifiable.

Edited January 7, 2018 by Phil Deakins

[Madelaine McMasters]

18 minutes ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

And, I’m only being polite. It’s sarcastic to write names and apologize now or am I missing something? 

Once again, you are making a claim that's not yours to make. Whether or not you seem sarcastic to us is our call. You may lay claim only to your intent. If you did not intend to be sarcastic, yet others say you are, then your perception of self is out of sync with the public's perception of you. That's what you must address if you want public acceptance. You can certainly attempt to achieve that by changing the public, but we outnumber you 7.6 billion to one. Contrary as I am, even I won't take on those odds.

Several times in my life, I've been told I'm intimidating. I hate hearing that, I don't want to appear intimidating. I probably haven't even met the next person who will tell me that, so I certainly can't change them. So, it's all on me. And it's all on you.

[Ashlyn Voir]

24 minutes ago, Tari Landar said:

You considered what I said as being passive aggressive (which it really wasn't, I'm either passive, or aggressive, I don't like mingling the two, it's just darn confusing, to be honest). But you don't understand how others can read your words as sarcastic, or perhaps even their own version of passive aggressive shade even? I'm not being a smartass when I ask that, I am actually asking if you really do not see how your words might be perceived as sarcastic passive aggressive retorts. 

If your intent was to be polite, it is very clear that your intent was about as clear as muck. It's ok, that happens, humans arne't always the greatest at expressing what it is we really want to say, textually. But it's also super easy to clear up actual confusion too. Thus far, most of your replies read the same, utilize the same text "speech" patterns, and come across the same. I think it's a reasonable conclusion for folks to believe that they are, in fact, not sincere politeness, but actually passive aggressiveness. If everyone else is so mistaken, and everyone has mistaken your words for something they are not....clear them up. I promise, it really is easy as heck..and probably could've been done pages ago (of course that would've eliminated a lot of the banter too).

When you choose not to clear up something you perceive as a mistake on others' part, you're only going to perpetuate the belief that their opinions of your words were actually correct all along. 

Shrugs....I forsee you not having a grand a time as you could, be it sl, these forums, or anywhere else, with that kind of approach. But, what do I know, I'm not a fan of creating enemies, personally, especially when what I want is to be able to connect with other people. 

Written words are often difficult to interpret and I have that issue a lot. Either way, so much went wrong and I’m to blame for it, but whether or not my experience will change is sort of beyond me at this point.

[Madelaine McMasters]

2 minutes ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

Written words are often difficult to interpret and I have that issue a lot. Either way, so much went wrong and I’m to blame for it, but whether or not my experience will change is sort of beyond me at this point.

Your experience will change if you will change. I sure hope that's not beyond you, just as I hope that's not beyond me. If you know you have difficulty interpreting people, ask for clarification, and try to find a more positive way to interpret what others say, even if that risks a bit more exposure. We're not as bad as you think. Well, at least the others are not as bad as you think. I'm in no position to make claims about myself.

;-).

Edited January 7, 2018 by Madelaine McMasters

[Phil Deakins]

On 07/01/2018 at 11:33 AM, Penny Patton said:

Ok, so you either misunderstood somehow, even tho I was pretty clear in what I did say, or you are lying. Now, I don't really believe you're intentionally lying, afterall my post is right there for anyone to read and see that what you're saying isn't true, so attempting to gaslight like that just makes no sense, but I am struggling to see how you can interpret what I said in that post as being a flat "all no-mod content is broken because it is no-mod" especially after I took the time to reiterate the parts of my statement you edited out.

Already addressed in a seperate post.

Again, ignoring the point about diminishing options as no-mod becomes more prevalent.

The diminishing options that I've read about in this thread concerned bodies and heads, and I specifically said that I can't argue against that. About the bulk of content, there are no diminishing options. You buy it today and you use for some time. If changes are made down the road, and equivalent things look better, you buy a new one that you like better. You can't expect what you buy today to sail through all possible changes to SL unaffected. Most will and some won't. That's just the way it is.

Maybe it's the couple of years I have on you in this field that gives me the experience to point out that not all furniture is made with wholly original animations or particularly expensive third party animations. Yes, animations can be the most costly part of a piece of furniture but this is not always the case.

A couple of years on me gives you no extra knowledge in this regard. I don't know if you've ever been a creator and seller, but I have over 10 years of hands-on experience of it. I do know what was being sold back then. In fact I was one of the people who were selling the crap back then. And I didn't say that most of the cost to the creator is the animations. If I didn't say it clearly enough, what I meant was that most of the money you pay for an item with animations in it is for the animations and the system that runs them. It has nothing to do with the cost to the creator. It has everything to do with the facilites it offers you. For instance, you may buy a sex bed for L$1000 but you wouldn't even pay L$300 just for the same bed without the animations. Nevertheless, after a while I did make all my own animations, and my own system to run them, and I can assure you that that part is far more time-consuming than creating the furniture.

 When you do come back and check up on this thread, let's turn things around a bit. In this thread I've given you a mountain of reasons why no-mod is typically not good for the consumer. From content with issues a knowledgeable customer could improve upon on their own... Creators generally don't make things for knowledgable people to change or improve. They make finished products for the masses. ...and unoptimized content made by inexperienced content creators that a knowledgeable consumer could easily fix to content that is rendered broken or obsolete via SL updates or new features but, if modifiable, a knowledgeable consumer could maintain and improve upon to keep it useful long after. Again, stuff is generally made for the masses, and not for the few who may be able to make changes to their creations. Incidentally, it is some of the masses who screw modifiable things up and call the creator out to fix it for them. "I was putting a texture on a wall and it accidentally went onto the sofa", for instance. And don't get me started on people trying to change the dimensions.

 What we have not heard in this thread, or any other thread on the topic, is examples of situations where content benefits the consumer or creator by being sold no-mod. And I'll even start you off because I do believe there are circumstances where content does benefit from being sold no-mod!

•  If a script is modifiable it's essentially full-perm since anyone can then copy the code and paste it into a script they can turn around and redistribute or edit to their own ends. So it's totally understandable that scripters require the no-mod setting to preserve the work they put in.  Ah. So you're not a creator Modifiable objects can have no-mod scripts in them. The stuff I made and sold was modifiable, but not the scripts inside them.
•  If an item is a part of an enclosed game or similar system, such as a multiplayer roleplay or combat game within SL, I can totally see no-mod being necessary to prevent people from tampering with game items and breaking the system.

These are legitimate reasons for no-mod!

 But what about a piece of furniture? How does a creator benefit from selling a chair no-mod opposed to modifiable? How about the consumer? It's been demonstrated extensively what the consumer loses in this proposition, but do they gain anything? Anything at all?

Yes, they gain something. They gain the inability to screrw the thing up. I sold furniture for over 10 years, and I can tell you that people with a little editing knowledge can make pigs' ears of stuff because they think they know what they're doing. And then who are they gonna call? There are times when, even though the item can be fixed, it's just not worth the time to do it, so you swap it for a new one. If you don't like it the way it is, don't buy the thing. It really is that simple.

As I said earlier, all but one item of the furniture I sold was modifiable, the one exception being a sculpture, so I do know the creators' side of things when selling modifiable stuff. It's not just about the user. The user has a simple choice - if you like it and it suits you, buy it. If it's not quite right for you, don't buy it, or you could try asking the creator to adjust it for you. In other words, buy what suits you, and not what could suit you when you've changed it.

Edited January 8, 2018 by Phil Deakins

[Vanagew]

On the second day I joined (about two weeks ago) I had a lady come up to me who was scantily dressed, had a large pair of knockers and a very big butt. Know what she did? She gave me 200 Linden for no reason, showed me around the game, gave me pointers about where not to go (I was and still am a child avatar), helped me out with my outfits and friended me.

Just the other day I was talking to her thanking her for her help when she gave me another 300 Linden. I was rather embarrassed by it, but she said she wanted to help me out and that she was glad that I had found other Child avatar friends. I have had other people who have helped me out immensely since I joined as well. She is one of the nicest people I have ever met online but I completely agree, it was so rude of her and others to be so kind towards me.

Edited January 7, 2018 by Vanagew

[Ashlyn Voir]

5 minutes ago, Vanagew said:

On the second day I joined (about two weeks ago) I had a lady come up to me who was scantily dressed, had a large pair of knockers and a very big butt. Know what she did? She gave me 200 Linden for no reason, showed me around the game, gave me poiners about where not to go (I was and still am a child avatar), helped me out with my outfits and friended me.

Just the other day I was talking to her thanking her for her help when she gave me another 300 Linden. I was rather embarrassed by it, but she said she wanted to help me out and that she was glad that I had found other Child avatar friends. I have had other people who have helped me out immensely since I joined as well. She is one of the nicest people I have ever met online but I completely agree, it was so rude of her and others to be so kind towards me.

‘...but I completely agree, it was so rude of her and others to be so kind towards me’

Huh? I’m not sure why this was said. I never said it was rude to be nice to people—what an oxymoron. There are few nice people who’d even do such a thing and you were lucky to be one of the very few to experience such acts of kindness. 

[Nalytha]

30 minutes ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

whether or not my experience will change is sort of beyond me at this point.

It really isn't. Either: 

A. Make an alt and start over 

or 

B. Move on with your life and be the person you want to be. Put anyone who can't let go of your past and brings you down on ignore. 

[Vanagew]

1 minute ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

‘...but I completely agree, it was so rude of her and others to be so kind towards me’

Huh? I’m not sure why this was said. I never said it was rude to be nice to people—what an oxymoron. There are few nice people who’d even do such a thing and you were lucky to be one of the very few to experience such acts of kindness.

I was being somewhat (okay very) sarcastic. If the OP thinks SL is rude, he should check out COD or Aion, the communities there redefine the meaning of the word "toxic". I'm extremely grateful to that lady just so you know and I've received help from others too who I also am extremely grateful to.

[Ashlyn Voir]

4 minutes ago, Vanagew said:

I was being somewhat (okay very) sarcastic. If the OP thinks SL is rude, he should check out COD or Aion, the communities there redefine the meaning of the word "toxic". I'm extremely grateful to that lady just so you know and I've received help from others too who I also am extremely grateful to.

I am the OP. ? 

 

Oh, this forum is child’s play compared to what I’ve dealt with in my past. Believe me. This is nothing and is so heavily moderated that it’s almost impossible to be a flaming a**hole.

Edited January 7, 2018 by Ashlyn Voir

[Innula Zenovka]

2 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

Oh, this forum is child’s play compared to what I’ve dealt with in my past. Believe me. This is nothing and is so heavily moderated that it’s almost impossible to be a flaming a**hole.

If you prefer, over the road at SLU we're very lightly moderated indeed.   We also all float down there.  But we do have pie.

I don't quite see, though, why you mention the moderation in this forum when Vanagew is obviously describing experiences in-world, not in this forum.       And I'm still wondering who you mean when you say "my people."     Stamp Collectors?  Linux users?   Linux users who collect stamps?  The possibilities are endless.

Edited January 8, 2018 by Innula Zenovka

[BilliJo Aldrin]

47 minutes ago, Innula Zenovka said:

If you prefer, over the road at SLU we're very lightly moderated indeed.   We also all float down there.  But we do have pie.

 

At least at SLU you can't lose your SL account if you go too far.

[Vanagew]

2 hours ago, Ashlyn Voir said:

I am the OP. ? 

 

Oh, this forum is child’s play compared to what I’ve dealt with in my past. Believe me. This is nothing and is so heavily moderated that it’s almost impossible to be a flaming a**hole.

I'm not saying there aren't rude and petty people who play the game, because there certainly are. However I don't see SL as being anywhere near as bad as the likes of COD, Aion and LoL. Those communities are the worst by far in my opinion.

[LyricalBookworm]

To the OP: I've been part of SL since 2009. My experiences have been for the greater majority really positive and rewarding. Friendships that were formed in 2009 are still going strong even now. The only difference are those people are family now. I've been very fortunate and I feel truly blessed at the wonderful people I've met along the way. A few have passed on, but I still try to just remember to be grateful because I had the chance to know such beautiful people. The loss hurt tremendously, but I will take that hurt because they made my world all the more incredible for being part of it.

Negative experiences have been few and far between thankfully. There is a total of two people on my mute list. There are some unpleasant people out there, but why let that ruin your entire SL? That seems like a rather miserable existence to me. You have no control over someone's behavior other than your own so why not focus on what you can do to make yourself happy? You seem to be in such a dark and bitter place. I've always found that what I put out is what I get in return.

The larger majority of people in SL and the forums are a diverse group of people. You're going to get all kinds giving you feedback when you choose to publicly post here. I've read this entire thread and the feedback offered has been trying to help you to see out of the little box you seem to have put yourself into. If you are open enough to take a deeper look at the feedback instead of getting completely worked up about it, it might actually benefit you.

I've been reading these forums for years although I've rarely posted. There have been negative moments, but you find those moments anywhere. It is part of life. For the most part though, this community is really helpful. I've gotten so much help here just by reading threads and the residents who post here regularly really do try to give constructive feedback so you can perhaps find a solution instead of pointless pity that only encourages most to wallow even more into the issue they find themselves in.

It is entirely up to you of course what your attitude will be. Your SL is seriously what you make of it. If you're determined to be miserable, that is what you will be. If you're actually willing to work on your own happiness and well-being, that will get you out of ruts you encounter in Sl and RL.

It is all what we make of it. It is all about your attitude.