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For me, there is no SL vs RL.

SL is part of your RL because you need something RL to be able to engage in SL. The only way to separate the two is by quitting SL or RL. The latter I won't recommend if you don't have a good reason for it. Also, you always take RL into SL. You can fake everything in SL but not your feelings and emotions. Feelings and emotions are always real no matter how you generate them. Even by faking things in SL you generate real emotions and feelings. And that's why one can use SL in therapeutic form. There have been posted many examples of how SL can change your RL life in a positive way. 

Many say they use SL to escape RL. But what they actually say is that they use SL to create feelings and emotions that make them forget or overwrite the feelings and emotions that RL is giving them. In my RL work I teach manifestation techniques and if you ever heard of Mind Movies then SL can be a mind movie on steroids if you design your SL world with a certain goal and learn how to take those feelings and emotions you generated in SL with you outside of SL.

When it comes to relationships RL and SL the above applies as well. Fake and play all you want but you cannot fake the feelings and emotions you generate for yourself and others. So communication within your RL relationship(s) and SL relationship(s) is important in both 'realities'. 

I think the problems start with people that keep claiming that they keep SL and RL completely separate. Good luck with that, because how hard you try, reality will hit you on the head twice as hard from both RL and SL.

 

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5 hours ago, Elijah Pyrithea said:

For me, there is no SL vs RL.

SL is part of your RL because you need something RL to be able to engage in SL. The only way to separate the two is by quitting SL or RL. The latter I won't recommend if you don't have a good reason for it. Also, you always take RL into SL. You can fake everything in SL but not your feelings and emotions. Feelings and emotions are always real no matter how you generate them. Even by faking things in SL you generate real emotions and feelings. And that's why one can use SL in therapeutic form. There have been posted many examples of how SL can change your RL life in a positive way. 

Many say they use SL to escape RL. But what they actually say is that they use SL to create feelings and emotions that make them forget or overwrite the feelings and emotions that RL is giving them. In my RL work I teach manifestation techniques and if you ever heard of Mind Movies then SL can be a mind movie on steroids if you design your SL world with a certain goal and learn how to take those feelings and emotions you generated in SL with you outside of SL.

When it comes to relationships RL and SL the above applies as well. Fake and play all you want but you cannot fake the feelings and emotions you generate for yourself and others. So communication within your RL relationship(s) and SL relationship(s) is important in both 'realities'. 

I think the problems start with people that keep claiming that they keep SL and RL completely separate. Good luck with that, because how hard you try, reality will hit you on the head twice as hard from both RL and SL.

 

As with everything in life, that only applies to a certain percentage of people, not everyone.

If someone RPs a relationship in SL (whether it be just dating, marriage, or what have you) with the expectation of it possibly leading to more (e.g., a "love" connection), then they are opening themselves up for disappointment if the other person is unwilling to fulfill their desire and it doesn't happen.. Same goes for those who seek to replace something which they feel is missing from their real lives.

On the other hand there are people such as myself who come to SL to have relax, explore, and to have fun doing what we like to do. We don't come here seeking "love" or "romance", because we get that in our day to day lives. But we do enjoy RPing in certain aspects, and that entails different things to different people. I can't speak for anyone else when I say this, but I'm myself here - what you see is what you get, that's why I don't feel the need to hide my RL status. I'm also not in search of anything more than what I came here for.

When you watch a movie and see people acting out or (role-playing) a part in a relationship, do you automatically assume that those people can't control their emotions during a scene, or that they must secretly have some sort of romantic attachment?  More often than not, these actors have spouses and significant others in RL and know how to  keep the fantasy of acting separate from the reality of their home lives. It's no different in SL. Albeit - some actors have been involved in affairs with their coworkers as a result, but that isn't the norm, which can also happen here if you feel as though your significant other is in someway failing to fulfill your needs. People don't usually go out seeking to have affairs or get involved romantically with someone else if they are feeling happy and satisfied with their other half.

The thing with SL is the fact that you have SOME people who come here with the objective of looking for an escape from or "replacement" for their real lives, and they end up falling victim to their basest desires when they enter into these types of RPing scenarios. And then you have people like me, as I have described up above. One person's rationale or motivation for doing something, doesn't necessarily apply to everyone else, nor do we all share the same personalities or RL/SL experiences. It would be too easy to generalize by placing everyone into the same box, and painting them with the same brush - unfortunately life isn't that simple.

Edited by Kristen Beornssen
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The question itself doesn't have a 'right' answer, it's a philosophical question, based entirely on the individuals involved on a case by case basis. It's like asking the general public to poll 'chastity vs. premarital intercourse' - some people will think one is absolute truth whilst others will think it hyper-conservative and out of the question.

Whether you think a relationship should exceed the boundaries of SL, then that's your choice - of course having discussed this with one's partner before planning what to name one's future children is probably a good idea.

Certainly, some people may deceive you and tell you that they absolutely want something real, but that's no different from dating in RL. People say things to get what they want, especially if someone is being naive and generous.

As for whether real love can be achieved in SL, or through other online platforms; sure it can - I know people who've met their RL spouses in everything from SL to World of Warcraft to League of Legends. Whether it's a productive form of seeking a life partner, on the other hand, is rather more debatable. We generally have a tendency to project our wishes and ideals to fill the blanks when thinking about someone we're into, and to be blunt; having a long-distance relationship with someone you've never met, there will be blanks.

Does that mean that you should submit to the 'mainstream' convention of considering SL romance as something void of emotion and only there to pass time and entertain? I'd say no, if that's not what you're looking for, then it won't serve you.

Personally, I don't care any more about what people do in SL than I care about what people do in night clubs. If all they want is to enjoy themselves with no strings attached, let them - I'll simply chose not to participate in such. 

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4 hours ago, Elijah Pyrithea said:

[ ... ] people that keep claiming that they keep SL and RL completely separate. Good luck with that, because how hard you try, reality will hit you on the head twice as hard from both RL and SL.

For many people, the words "I keep SL separate from RL" in their profile does not mean "I am able to separate my RL emotions and moods entirely from my SL identity". What they actually mean is "Please don't ask me questions about my RL, because I don't want to talk about that here".

It's a slightly lazy shorthand, admittedly, but it leads to a lot of assumptions about those people, such as the one quoted above. They're not trying to convince others that they can split their personalities; they just don't want to talk about where they're from, what they do for a living, etc.

Edited by Skell Dagger
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I don’t really subscribe to Victorian mores, so this is less of an issue with me :-) Consensual Poly makes much more sense to me in the modern world.

Thats not an “open” relationship - it’s more like “committed relations with more than 2 people involved”.

Anyone who has RL and SL significant others who all actually know about and consent to one another is pretty much there......

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13 hours ago, Skell Dagger said:

For many people, the words "I keep SL separate from RL" in their profile does not mean "I am able to separate my RL emotions and moods entirely from my SL identity". What they actually mean is "Please don't ask me questions about my RL, because I don't want to talk about that here".

It's a slightly lazy shorthand, admittedly, but it leads to a lot of assumptions about those people, such as the one quoted above. They're not trying to convince others that they can split their personalities; they just don't want to talk about where they're from, what they do for a living, etc.

^ this

And I can't blame them to make it short. Profile space is limited and one short sentence may be more sucessful than writing in full length why you are unwilling to use Second Life as a second Facebook or Tinder.

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I think the key here is honesty. The thing with that is that’s like asking for something as nebulous as world peace. Does that mean countries stop fighting other countries or an end to nonviolence period? It can be interpreted in many ways. The bottom line is people are people and what acceptable is going to vary from person to person.

SL adds another layer to all of that. You’re in a world where you could be dealing with someone who’s avatar is literally a virtual representation of themselves. You see that all the time in group chats or in a conversation “My avatar looks just like me....” All the way to an avatar being as different as possible from their real life selves. It’s a pretty wide range and what’s funny is in 15 years of SL the two extremes haven’t really reconciled.

I haven’t even gotten into roleplay yet. In that spectrum is another spectrum: How much roleplay is going on in there? For some people they’re in character the entire time they’re logged in. For some people they’re in character at certain times and only those specific times.

Sounds confusing right? Well it is. That’s why it’s up to you to be discerning when it comes to this and on multiple levels, most importantly to yourself. 

The first thing I do when someone contacts me is pull up their profile. If I see things there that indicate this isn’t a person (I’m using person here loosely and in both senses) I want to be around....I’m out. Some people don’t write profiles or even read them.

Ok profile looks ok or there’s nothing there. I’ll continue the conversation. At some point in the conversation both my intention and their intention for being here and the contact is going to come out in some way. Here’s where the honesty comes in.

If one of us says we’re married in real life the likelihood of something real coming out of this drops. What if both of us say we’re married and that’s what we’re here for? There’s still a lot of room in there for wants and needs to not be the same. There’s also room in there for lies.

The bottom line here is only you know why you’re here. It’s up to you to convey that to other people. On that same token, it’s up to you to decide what other people are approaching you for and how much you’re willing to go along with  it.

 

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9 hours ago, Syo Emerald said:

^ this

And I can't blame them to make it short. Profile space is limited and one short sentence may be more sucessful than writing in full length why you are unwilling to use Second Life as a second Facebook or Tinder.

If it should be short and in a way that doesn't give wrong interpretations I don't understand why people don't write: "I don't talk about RL in SL." or "My RL is off-topic". That means that you don't want to talk about RL in SL. 

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On 4/12/2018 at 7:00 PM, Vin Soulstar said:

Easy, I wouldn't date someone that is married in RL. 

IMO if you are happy in you're RL relationship you shouldn't need to date in SL, unless of course you have an open RL relationship. 

To me it's a form of cheating, maybe I am just old fashioned. 

SL is many things to many people, not everyone here is acting out something they wish they had in RL. There is a creative aspect to SL that can be very appealing to creative people. I see no reason why a person who is married in RL, cannot create a married character here. Of course that needs to be made clear to the SL partner, that this isn't about RL and never can be about RL. Inn fact two married people can form a partnership based on mutual respect for each other's RL relationships, that helps to guard against the temptations that come with this place.

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1 hour ago, Elijah Pyrithea said:
10 hours ago, Syo Emerald said:

^ this

And I can't blame them to make it short. Profile space is limited and one short sentence may be more sucessful than writing in full length why you are unwilling to use Second Life as a second Facebook or Tinder.

If it should be short and in a way that doesn't give wrong interpretations I don't understand why people don't write: "I don't talk about RL in SL." or "My RL is off-topic". That means that you don't want to talk about RL in SL. 

Now all you need to do is approach every person in SL who has "I don't mix SL and RL" in their profile, determine which meaning their words have, and tell them that - if they mean "I don't want to talk about my RL in SL" - they're doing it wrong, and they should write it differently instead.

Good luck with that. ;)

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5 hours ago, Elijah Pyrithea said:

If it should be short and in a way that doesn't give wrong interpretations I don't understand why people don't write: "I don't talk about RL in SL." or "My RL is off-topic". That means that you don't want to talk about RL in SL. 

Does it really matter to be that precise? For me, the statement is clear no matter what it reads. Effectively: "I don't want to talk about my job, husband, how much I earn, what my bank account number is, my full address, my email address, my IM address, where my kids go to school, or pretty much any of that private stuff with strangers. Stop being stalker creepy about it and insisting you know all these intimate details".

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6 hours ago, Talligurl said:

SL is many things to many people, not everyone here is acting out something they wish they had in RL. There is a creative aspect to SL that can be very appealing to creative people. I see no reason why a person who is married in RL, cannot create a married character here. Of course that needs to be made clear to the SL partner, that this isn't about RL and never can be about RL. Inn fact two married people can form a partnership based on mutual respect for each other's RL relationships, that helps to guard against the temptations that come with this place.

I've never tried the role play side of SL so wouldn't really know how it works but if I was married in RL I certainly wouldn't want my wife/gf shagging someone in SL and having a 'relationship' with them.

Friends, by all means but you would have to be a zombie not to get turned on while being intimate with someone in SL, the poses, the emoting so I wouldn't want my wife/gf to be turned on and virtual shag any one but me.

The only women I have come across in 7+ years on SL who are married in RL and want something more in SL be it some company or some fun are the ones who are missing something sexually in RL or are unhappy in their marriage and need companionship. 

That's one thing about SL, you can be whoever or whatever you want and be with whoever you want so each to their own. :)

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1 hour ago, Vin Soulstar said:

I've never tried the role play side of SL so wouldn't really know how it works but if I was married in RL I certainly wouldn't want my wife/gf shagging someone in SL and having a 'relationship' with them.

Friends, by all means but you would have to be a zombie not to get turned on while being intimate with someone in SL, the poses, the emoting so I wouldn't want my wife/gf to be turned on and virtual shag any one but me.

The only women I have come across in 7+ years on SL who are married in RL and want something more in SL be it some company or some fun are the ones who are missing something sexually in RL or are unhappy in their marriage and need companionship. 

That's one thing about SL, you can be whoever or whatever you want and be with whoever you want so each to their own. :)

We aren't, the avatars are. LOL 

Speaking for myself, pixel sex is of little importance in my marriage roleplay. I've never really been into it and I've been lucky enough to find partners who felt the same. On the rare occasional where it has happened - I'm usually in the other room in RL chatting with my spouse or watching TV, so how is that for realism? I know, I suck! :D

Also I want to add, that I do this because I enjoy being married in RL, so why not experience the same in SL? It's not always about 'missing' something, some people really just do it because they like it. Simple as that.

 

Edit: Oh, and this is Kristen on my RP acct!

Edited by Callitzia
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I see this has turned into another of the age old debates that predates Second Life: Can a person truly separate Role Play and Real Life?

The answer is: It depends on the person.

In the chat room and message board days this was not as big a debate as it seems to have become as back then you interacted via words on a screen and perhaps the occasional image to represent your character.

Back then it quickly became obvious to passerby that they had not entered into a "normal" chat room or stumbled upon a "normal" message board - for the most part you did not have people in normal places describing their actions while chatting on a topic.

Mind, you still had people who had issues with IC/OOC separation: Some went so far as to claim they truly were their character and Goddess help you if you ran into one of these and did not realize until it was too late!

Then you have the flip side of that coin (which can be just as concerning): Those who truly can fully separate their Character from themselves. These types ... Well suffice to say that I ran into two variations of this myself - One older woman who would create a single character at a time, somehow setting aside mind space for said character, and letting that space take hold when engaged in Role Play. This person kept to that single character until something/someone came along and caused a permanent death for the character. At that point the mind space set aside was deleted along with the character.

Then you have the other variation of this where the person plays as more than one character and you truly have no idea if the "person" you're supposedly talking to when Out Of Character ... is truly a real person. These types are often (thankfully?) so unstable that they may well eventually self-destruct in some form.

On the other end of this you have the people who simply portray an idealized version (or similar variant) of themselves. I really don't think I need to explain this (at least I hope I do not).

Mind I do realize I may not be as clear as I'd like to be while trying to explain the above so I'll clarify (or try to) something here: The type that has issues with or simply cannot keep IC and OOC separate whatsoever have enough issues that they really should not be engaging in Role Play whatsoever while the "flip side" described above has quite a bit in common with some of the better Method Actors out there. The type right above this attempt at an explanation have their Second Life equivalent: Those that have done their best to make their avatar into an idealized version of their own appearance and not acting any differently to how they are when not logged in.

To continue, most people engaged in Role Play (be it through Second Life or not) fall somewhere in between. I myself do as much as I can to keep my characters and myself as separate as possible - there is some overlap but not enough to really matter.

All of this is made more difficult by the very nature of Second Life: It is a very visually intensive environment and unlike a video game or a TV Show/Movie ... The user not only directly controls the avatar but they have far more control over the appearance of said avatar than they otherwise would in a traditional game.

You might feel for the characters in a game or other media ... but with Second Life you have an unprecedented amount of control over pretty much all aspects of the avatar. Part of why we call them avatars and not toons or some similar nomenclature.

I hope I have gotten the idea and point across here, I haven't exactly had much coffee yet. I am fairly certain most of the RP type users will at least understand and I hope they'll chime in to clean any of this up.

Edited by Solar Legion
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I think you nailed it. The key is recognizing who you’re dealing with as soon as possible.

Anybody can be fooled or not see something coming. You can always have someone transform into someone else with no warning. Those...are the people you want to avoid.

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On 4/12/2018 at 6:00 PM, Vin Soulstar said:

Easy, I wouldn't date someone that is married in RL. 

IMO if you are happy in you're RL relationship you shouldn't need to date in SL, unless of course you have an open RL relationship. 

To me it's a form of cheating, maybe I am just old fashioned. 

Your a 100 percent true on this I agree yes its old fashion I am the same way.  I am unattached in both I keep my self reserved it have to be someone special to really wake it up. If you are taken best to fix what you have or work out but its there life there freewill I have my likes others have there I am just one for one.

 

 

 

 

Edited by Dreamerra
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On 13/04/2018 at 1:47 PM, Elijah Pyrithea said:

For me, there is no SL vs RL.

SL is part of your RL because you need something RL to be able to engage in SL. The only way to separate the two is by quitting SL or RL. The latter I won't recommend if you don't have a good reason for it. Also, you always take RL into SL. You can fake everything in SL but not your feelings and emotions. Feelings and emotions are always real no matter how you generate them. Even by faking things in SL you generate real emotions and feelings. And that's why one can use SL in therapeutic form. There have been posted many examples of how SL can change your RL life in a positive way. 

Many say they use SL to escape RL. But what they actually say is that they use SL to create feelings and emotions that make them forget or overwrite the feelings and emotions that RL is giving them. In my RL work I teach manifestation techniques and if you ever heard of Mind Movies then SL can be a mind movie on steroids if you design your SL world with a certain goal and learn how to take those feelings and emotions you generated in SL with you outside of SL.

When it comes to relationships RL and SL the above applies as well. Fake and play all you want but you cannot fake the feelings and emotions you generate for yourself and others. So communication within your RL relationship(s) and SL relationship(s) is important in both 'realities'. 

I think the problems start with people that keep claiming that they keep SL and RL completely separate. Good luck with that, because how hard you try, reality will hit you on the head twice as hard from both RL and SL.

While I agree with some of what you've said (emphasis mine for the main exceptions), you're missing a key nuance that is vitally important: you are assuming that people in SL relationships are in those relationships because of genuine emotions.

Don't get me wrong, there are many people that will form genuine friendships and romantic relationships. Those relationships can and are completely fine, are genuine, and should not be devalued by what I'm saying here; indeed many of those relationships turn into lasting RL relationships precisely because of the emotional connection forged here.

Many players here are essentially just actors. Their avatar is not a reflection of themselves, but instead a character created in their own minds, radically distinct and separate from their own. There are no feelings and emotions involved, because the relationships they form are just for show. No one sane would claim that two soap opera actors paid to play two characters in a relationship must have genuine feelings for each other in order to play those characters, that would be a nonsensical claim. Does every actress taking on the role of Juilet have true romantic feelings for her counterpart Romeo? Of course not, that's ludicrous, no one would take that claim even remotely seriously. For many SL players, their avatar and their avatar's relationships are no different.

Both approaches to SL are legitimate, and my personal attitude is firmly in the "each to their own" camp. I think many also fall between the two, but that is down to the individual approach, nor does that have to be set in stone.

The problem here lies in people using your viewpoint as a stick to beat people with - and this isn't a direct accusation towards you, but a more general observation. They pour their genuine feelings and emotions into their self-insert avatar, and they refuse to accept that anyone else might be different. There are many that refuse to accept the validity of the separation of an SL character and a RL person, and try to browbeat others into merging SL and RL against their wishes. It is a deeply toxic approach that causes a great deal of distress to many, and let's be honest here; it's mostly RL men towards SL women (regardless of RL gender identity), but there are plenty of exceptions.

That rigidity and that refusal to even consider an approach alternative to your own is deeply problematic, for yourself and for others around you. I have no problem with you approaching SL this way, but the moment you (again, not you personally) try to force that mindset upon others is the moment you cross the line into what is, I'm afraid, unacceptable.

Edited by AyelaNewLife
Edits to avoid unintentional accusations
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39 minutes ago, AyelaNewLife said:

you are assuming that people in SL relationships are in those relationships because of genuine emotions.

Absolutely not assuming that. My point is that all emotions and feelings. If you fake them (faking is creating them nevertheless) or not are real emotions and feelings. 

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1 hour ago, AyelaNewLife said:

While I agree with some of what you've said (emphasis mine for the main exceptions), you're missing a key nuance that is vitally important: you are assuming that people in SL relationships are in those relationships because of genuine emotions.

Don't get me wrong, there are many people that will form genuine friendships and romantic relationships. Those relationships can and are completely fine, are genuine, and should not be devalued by what I'm saying here; indeed many of those relationships turn into lasting RL relationships precisely because of the emotional connection forged here.

Many players here are essentially just actors. Their avatar is not a reflection of themselves, but instead a character created in their own minds, radically distinct and separate from their own. There are no feelings and emotions involved, because the relationships they form are just for show. No one sane would claim that two soap opera actors paid to play two characters in a relationship must have genuine feelings for each other in order to play those characters, that would be a nonsensical claim. Does every actress taking on the role of Juilet have true romantic feelings for her counterpart Romeo? Of course not, that's ludicrous, no one would take that claim even remotely seriously. For many SL players, their avatar and their avatar's relationships are no different.

Both approaches to SL are legitimate, and my personal attitude is firmly in the "each to their own" camp. I think many also fall between the two, but that is down to the individual approach, nor does that have to be set in stone.

Quote

 

The problem here lies in people using your viewpoint as a stick to beat people with - and this isn't a direct accusation towards you, but a more general observation. They pour their genuine feelings and emotions into their self-insert avatar, and they refuse to accept that anyone else might be different. There are many that refuse to accept the validity of the separation of an SL character and a RL person, and try to browbeat others into merging SL and RL against their wishes. It is a deeply toxic approach that causes a great deal of distress to many, and let's be honest here; it's mostly RL men towards SL women (regardless of RL gender identity), but there are plenty of exceptions.

That rigidity and that refusal to even consider an approach alternative to your own is deeply problematic, for yourself and for others around you. I have no problem with you approaching SL this way, but the moment you (again, not you personally) try to force that mindset upon others is the moment you cross the line into what is, I'm afraid, unacceptable.

 

 

Very well said!

Edited by Kristen Beornssen

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13 minutes ago, Elijah Pyrithea said:

Absolutely not assuming that. My point is that all emotions and feelings. If you fake them (faking is creating them nevertheless) or not are real emotions and feelings. 

Try explaining that to a sociopath.

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1 hour ago, AyelaNewLife said:

Many players here are essentially just actors. Their avatar is not a reflection of themselves, but instead a character created in their own minds, radically distinct and separate from their own.

This,...is something I really put into question.

Maybe they are not that person because they would be shunned, or in case of Goreans just locked up, but I really really doubt you can enjoy acting as something you are not at least partially true to yourself for long...

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17 minutes ago, Fionalein said:

This,...is something I really put into question.

Maybe they are not that person because they would be shunned, or in case of Goreans just locked up, but I really really doubt you can enjoy acting as something you are not at least partially true to yourself for long...

Ever met anyone in SL who does race play and only portrays themselves as another race (perceived characteristics and all)? Or someone who is a different gender in SL than they are in RL and only wants to be known by the gender they play in SL?

It happens, esp in the RPing community, where some will get lost in the fantasy so to speak, and in essence become their characters. It certainly happens in the acting world from time to time.

Edited by Kristen Beornssen
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14 minutes ago, Kristen Beornssen said:

It happens, esp in the RPing community, where some will get lost in the fantasy so to speak, and in essence become their characters. It certainly happens in the acting world from time to time.

I met in those tabletop roleplaying often enough and I have no problem in someone wants to play a girl or a boy or a weretiger or a hermaphrodite martian or whatever and gets lost in portraying that character... but if said person portrays a sadist or psychopathic mass murder I quickly left that group and put as much distance between me and them as possible because I fear they might "become their character" (well gamemasters aside, who's job it is to portray the villains, but even there I decided not to play with two anymore because they delighted in portraying psychos to much)

Edited by Fionalein

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20 minutes ago, Fionalein said:

I met in those tabletop roleplaying often enough and I have no problem in someone wants to play a girl or a boy or a weretiger or a hermaphrodite martian or whatever and gets lost in portraying that character... but if said person portrays a sadist or psychopathic mass murder I quickly left that group and put as much distance between me and them as possible because I fear they might "become their character" (well gamemasters aside, who's job it is to portray the villains, but even there I decided not to play with two anymore because they delighted in portraying psychos to much)

Which goes back to this statement : Their avatar is not a reflection of themselves, but instead a character created in their own minds, radically distinct and separate from their own.

That same SL sadist or psychopath may be a loving, caring person in RL who wouldn't harm a fly, but how are we to know for certain? The only part of themselves that you see inworld is this character that they've created.

There's a guy that I've known for a few years who likes to RP as an escaped convict, and he will only communicate as his character. I know nothing about this person in RL, and was never really curious enough to inquire further. Because as I saw it, he was living out his fantasy, so to each their own.

Some people take it to extremes - though, most do not. With SL, you have people from all over the world converging into one virtual space, so there are bound to be a few real psychopaths and sociopaths who get caught up in the mix. For the average SLer, the trick is trying to determine who is who and separating them from the pretenders.

Edited by Kristen Beornssen

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2 hours ago, Kristen Beornssen said:

For the average SLer, the trick is trying to determine who is who and separating them from the pretenders.

Why do you want to do that? If a person chooses to behave like an idiot in SL and is a loving and kind family dad in RL That's up to them. Why do you want to use energy to figure out who this person is in RL? You have to deal with him/her in SL nevertheless and the person in question would expect you to react to an idiot as that is the way he emotes and expresses himself towards you in SL  And like @Fionalein also stated, the fear of a person becoming his/her character is not something to think lightly about. A dive in psychological and cognitive science from recent years shows that this can happen in reality and in fact, it has become a reality in some cases. Again. Feelings and emotions even if you act them out.. they are real if not to yourself it is to another person and if you repeat that cycle long enough you can become affected by these emotions and feelings yourself.

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