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When you've spent several years inworld on the same avatar, lounged on beaches with chilled-out music playing and waves crashing and felt your real life stress levels decrease, had wide-ranging conver

And yet one of the things I hear most from women I talk to (or overhear in group chats) in SL is that they wish their own menfolk would bother to get dressed rather than just get dressed. In other wor

By the title I thought this was a thread about Skell. Or Vin, Vinnie, Tommy, etc.

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42 minutes ago, Skell Dagger said:

And yet one of the things I hear most from women I talk to (or overhear in group chats) in SL is that they wish their own menfolk would bother to get dressed rather than just get dressed. In other words: take the time and a little pride in dressing their avatar, rather than buying one t-shirt and pair of jeans and calling it done.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

I will never understand woman's taste in men clothing though. I was clowning around when creating my new avie upon returning to SL. Put myself in tights, a suit jacked and worker boots. And never had so much compliments on my outfit before. Of course I act like "yeah I am very stylish and like unique looks" and be baffled in the meantime...

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You find very many avatars who prefer Niramyth in sims related to maledom.

It can be that who put people off. SL is very visual.

Most females in SL are also "once bitten. twice shy". Many assume that any conversation, no matter how Nice it starts, go over to pressure for s*x.

Also I think it can me a suspicion that the real person behind the keyboard is female. Many think men are not interested in creating goodlooking avatars. They think of men like helpless boys who has to be shown good stores. Shopping is a couple thing, I think. I see many females accompany a noobish looking male around in the stores.

"Malt" is an own term. Male Alternative Avatar, specific for a female avatar who also has one or two male avatars.

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Here's the thing: it's perfectly easy (if one takes a little bit of time and effort, and - of course - money) to create a nice-looking male avatar. However, few people will walk up to a nice-looking male avatar and compliment them on... well, how nice-looking they are. What they will compliment you on is - as @JackSinned pointed out in his post - if you've done something different than nice-looking-and-normal; if you've pushed the boat out and don't look like all the other nice-looking male avatars in SL. Even if that pushing-out of the boat is simply accessorising well.

Case in point: I rarely go around and walk up to random nice-looking female avatars to tell them how nice they look (quite apart from the fact that I don't want to appear to be coming on to them). The ones that I do take a risk on complimenting are the ones who are different; who have stepped up their fashion game and are rocking the hell out of whatever they're wearing. Whether she's kawaii and dressed from head-to-toe in unicorn stuff with a group tag that states "I fart sparkles" (seriously, how could I not tell her how awesome she was?!) or whether she's classy and elegant like some 40s starlet, coiffed to perfection.

To me, Second Life fashion is an art form. It's a form of artistic expression that I enjoy. So I get where the OP is coming from when he regards his avatar as a work of art. It's a unique take on the SL avatar, but - as already stated - most other residents see us as people and not an art form.

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3 minutes ago, Marianne Little said:

Also I think it can me a suspicion that the real person behind the keyboard is female. Many think men are not interested in creating goodlooking avatars. They think of men like helpless boys who has to be shown good stores. Shopping is a couple thing, I think. I see many females accompany a noobish looking male around in the stores.

Another misconception: "Oh, he looks stylish? He's got to be gay." True in some cases but not all. Not by a long stretch.

Some of us who blog male fashion are trying our damndest to dispel the very common fallacy that Marianne mentions there, of most men not being interested in (or even capable of) creating good-looking avatars.

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Yeah I recognize that from before my SL restart. I used to have a  fairly good looking male avi as far as you could pre-mesh bodies... and I actualy helped alot of girls to upgrade their looks (I seem to have a better fashion sense for woman clothing than men clothing...) and usualy they asumed I am gay, without it ever even been a topic of conversation at all. I found it funny though. I am straight but I have never had any goals of finding relationships in SL so did not felt set back by that.

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Ok - to clear-up a couple things here that have already been misconstrued from my initial query. - I didn't create these av's to "attract" anyone. I'm happily married. My sexuality or gender has nothing to do with the avatars I create. I have a giant Toilet Paper Roll avatar among many others, whose gender is never questioned. But what I think I am seeing here - and the feedback I am getting from other Social Media sites where I posted this same inquiry, is that people tend to personify and project personality assumptions onto human looking art - aka Avatars. 

Edited by DanielWolfsong
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5 minutes ago, DanielWolfsong said:

. But what I think I am seeing here - and the feedback I am getting from other Social Media sites where I posted this same inquiry, is that people tend to personify and project personality assumptions onto human looking art - aka Avatars. 

I think that is human nature. If it looks like a person and can do lots of things that people do, we tend to want to view it as a person and treat it like a person.  

If you truly are wanting people in SL to view and treat your avatar as a work of art, you might need to do a lot of searching inworld for just the right group of people - I'd suggest starting with various aspects of the inworld art scene.

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14 minutes ago, DanielWolfsong said:

people tend to personify and project personality assumptions onto human looking art - aka Avatars

When you've spent several years inworld on the same avatar, lounged on beaches with chilled-out music playing and waves crashing and felt your real life stress levels decrease, had wide-ranging conversations about every subject under the sun while sitting around a campfire with a bunch of people from all around the world, danced for hours in a club to music that gets you pumped in real life, and many of the thousands of other things you can do in SL... your avatar becomes you. It's an extension of you that reaches into the virtual world. That's not projection of personality or personification; it's other people who have had those same experiences acknowledging the you in your avatar.

That's not human-looking art; it's being human in a virtual world.

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On 07/11/2017 at 5:19 PM, LittleMe Jewell said:

Side note - The first avi isn't really my style, but the second dude would definitely get a second look from me. 

The first guy looks more like a surfer dude or wanna-be model or partying college student, whereas the second looks much more distinguished and a bit mysterious.  Totally, just my opinion.

 

My personal feedback on these avies is very close to LittleMe.

For me, the 1st avie doesn't feel very inviting for a chat. He feels too insecure.

On the other hand, the second one looks more stable and deeper. More like someone I could chat for hours with and we'll still have a topic to talk about after.

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Doppelganger syndrome; a.k.a. "ZOMG, not ANOTHER Aesthetic clone! *Rolls Eyes*"

This is likely what you're running up against. Most guys with the triangle shape usually have arms way too short and heads way too small and it's extra funny when their man-bits are as large as their biceps.

I wore an Aesthetic for a couple years and had no problems and the way I did it was to completely change the face to be unrecognizable as a Nyrameth avatar. I started here: https://marketplace.secondlife.com/stores/56539 Be sure you choose one with the Aesthetic logo if you go that route (I wore the Nalbone face, myself - though I have since dropped that body and head altogether).

The second thing to do is reshape to be a lot more natural: no triangle shape; narrow your shoulders so they are just a touch wider than your hips, add a little belly, and lengthen your arms so middle finger comes to the mid-point of your thigh. (I am a graphic designer and photographer in RL, so I notice these things all the time). In short: tone yourself way down. Here is what I keep hearing, myself when I wore it and still today when talked about: Aesthetic is "creepy". That's from many of the ladies. So start by not looking like just another clone, giving people reason to roll their eyes.

And I mention all this more as an expression of what I went through and did while I was wearing that body and head. Though like I said, I've grown out of it and went with something a little more mainstream-looking. Though in more than ten years in SL that damned Nalbone face was the best I ever had and got a LOT is awesome comments. :)

Edited by Qa Boa
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On 11/7/2017 at 7:57 AM, DanielWolfsong said:

I modified 2 of my male avatars with Aesthetic Mesh and other facial adjustments and now no one will interact with them when I take them out into public areas and clubs. - I've heard differing reasons for this wanted to get more feedback. Are people really put-off by attractively modified male avatars? And why? As an artist I felt very proud of my work creating these two.

FINN PROFILE MESH.png

Danny Profile mesh 2.png

I definitely find the second one more approachable.  He is a little different giving me something to start a conversation with.  Where is he going all dressed up?  What secrets does he have?  Maybe he has other accessories like a cane to ask about.  Does he RP? /me checks his profile, groups, and picks for a conversation starter. 

The first one,  by superficial looks alone, holds no appeal to me.  I have already decided he is as deep as a Ken doll.  Hang loose, dude!  I have nothing to start a conversation with.  He is carrying a surf board, ready to hang out on the beach with a beer and bikini clad woman.  (I hate the beach)  /me might check his profile for confirmation of my initial response.

I recently made a male alt and made him to be what I consider MY ideal look.  He only gets hit on by other men.  No woman has ever started a conversation with him.

Edited by Cinnamon Mistwood
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On 08/11/2017 at 1:41 AM, Rhonda Huntress said:

By the title I thought this was a thread about Skell.

Or Vin, Vinnie, Tommy, etc.

I actually don't get hit on much which honestly, is nice. I feel sorry for some of the females on SL constantly bombarded with IM's. 

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On 11/7/2017 at 1:47 PM, Skell Dagger said:

Here's the thing: it's perfectly easy (if one takes a little bit of time and effort, and - of course - money) to create a nice-looking male avatar. However, few people will walk up to a nice-looking male avatar and compliment them on... well, how nice-looking they are.

Actually, I have done just that when I've seen an avie that someone obviously took extra time and care to make it look unique! I've PMd people and complimented them on the fact that their avie is absolutely not run of the mill. If I ran into you out in public, I would definitely message you!! I've even complimented female avies that are unique! Also, @DanielWolfsong , I personally don't find either attractive at all, but that's just me. I tend to prefer the dark and brooding look, like Skell is so exceptional at creating. 

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9 minutes ago, Aislin Ceawlin said:

I rather love your avie, too, Vin! He's not like all the others, which is really appealing. 

Well thank you, I take RL pictures so I'm still learning when it comes to SL but it's fun trying out different lighting styles. I still have a lot to learn in SL. :)

 

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8 minutes ago, Vin Soulstar said:

Well thank you, I take RL pictures so I'm still learning when it comes to SL but it's fun trying out different lighting styles. I still have a lot to learn in SL. :)

 

Me, too, Vin! I came just short of getting a degree in photography while I was back in school advancing my nursing degree. ( My mom used to say I was an eternal student, lol) I actually find SL photography a bit more difficult. I did have to take a couple classes on Photoshop as part of the curriculum, which I'm thankful for! 

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3 minutes ago, Aislin Ceawlin said:

Me, too, Vin! I came just short of getting a degree in photography while I was back in school advancing my nursing degree. ( My mom used to say I was an eternal student, lol) I actually find SL photography a bit more difficult. I did have to take a couple classes on Photoshop as part of the curriculum, which I'm thankful for! 

I haven't been out in RL and taken many for a while but I still enjoy it, I tend to get bored of the cameras I use so I think it's time to sell my two and buy just one. 

I'm no good at photoshop, I use lightroom for my RL pictures which is why I have to try and find a nice sim with a nice background for pictures. :)

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4 minutes ago, Vin Soulstar said:

I haven't been out in RL and taken many for a while but I still enjoy it, I tend to get bored of the cameras I use so I think it's time to sell my two and buy just one. 

I'm no good at photoshop, I use lightroom for my RL pictures which is why I have to try and find a nice sim with a nice background for pictures. :)

I looove b&w film photography, and haunt the thrift stores looking for old film cameras (usually 35mm). I think I have around 15 right now, lol! You can find really nice cameras with filters, lenses, and all the goodies for great prices! 

Edited by Aislin Ceawlin
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