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Is the political correctness in today's world suppressing the heterosexual relationship?  Is political correctness and feminism attempting to stifle heterosexual men?  Is the display of a heterosexual relationship on the cusp of extinction? Does the heterosexual man need to 'hide' his sexuality - his identity when he is in the presence of non-heteros?  

What is the view of the heterosexual man who posts in a LBGTI forum?  Do I, as a heterosexual man, have anything to offer?  My sexuality is tied to the relationships I form.  Aren't gay issues *relationship* issues, too?  If not, what is specific to the gay man that is not specific to me - unless it's all only about the 'sexual activity,' and not the relationship itself?     

Must I defend my sexuality?  Must a gay man defend his sexuality?  Why is one singled out over the other for a 'specific' forum?   Who really cares if the relationship is MM, MF, or FF.  Shouldn't it be about issues we face in relationships: treating one another with kindness, humor, reasoning, compassion, compromise; and discussing the issues that lead to unhealthy types of relationships, or how to build better relationships?

 

 

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Storm Clarence wrote:

Who really cares if the relationship is MM, MF, or FF. 

Exactly! Or MTs, FTs, MTg, FTg, MA, FA (without breaking the Ts's further down into M2F and F2M Ts's and specifying the biolog. gender of the Tg's and A's), and of course all the polyamorous combinations like MMF, FFM, FMFM, FTsM, MFFFFF (for our Middle Eastern residents) and so on. Don't even get me started on interspecies couples. And then there are the D/s variations... M/f, F/m, M/m, F/f, Ts/tg etc.... I guess I can see how a "normal" hetero couple would feel a bit lost in there :)

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Sometimes it seems difficult and even frustrating at times to be a Vanilla Male.  I meet girls who at least initially I like and think I would like to get to know better but then I read their profiles and feel like there is no way I could ever satisfy them.  Yes, there really are girls out there who are into swinging from the chandeliers with bisexual furry skunks.  And in public no less!!!!!

Is their really much room left for a simple Vanilla guy here?

 

 

 

 

/me goes and does my daily perusal of Craig's List personals.

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I am of the view that no one should feel defensive about their gender/gender identity and sexuality.  If one has a view to share, share it, understanding that there may be others who disagree or not.  I am far more interested in discussing relationship issues that we all can relate to in some way or another (as members of the human species).

As an example, I will point (metaphorically speaking) to a thread that was pulled that focused on a relationship where there was a suspicion of a breech of trust and deception.  Many of those who responded focused on what the OP might do or not do in that situation.  Others focused on...well, something else.

It is clear to me, now, that one or two of the more expressive posters in that thread have now rethought their view on deception and find it would be hurtful to portray oneself as one gender when the 'partner' in the relationship (or, for argument's sake, a casual acquaintance)  has made it plain that they are comfortable only with one gender both in SL and RL -- and they must be the same.

We are capable of modifying our opinions as more information becomes available or as we have had time to consider things.  I would like this 'space' to allow for discussion and thoughtful consideration.  I do not think that is too much to ask.

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At the risk of missing that this was one of your rp-style posts, Storm, I'd like to point out that this is not in fact the LBGT Forum section at all (btw, does anyone know what the "I" stands for? New one on me) but rather the Identity and Relationships Forum section. I took that to mean Identity as in sexual identity; to the best of my knowledge heterosexual is still a valid one of those. Relationships I took to mean, well, relationships.

You should be good to go, far as I can tell.

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Argus Collingwood wrote:

 

Dillon Levenque wrote:

(btw, does anyone know what the "I" stands for? New one on me) 

I= Intersex  

 

Thanks, Argus. I should have thought of that; I'm familiar with the term. And I could have sworn I saw an answer from Ishtara a few seconds ago right below yours so thanks, Ishtara also.

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Storm Clarence wrote:

Is the political correctness in today's world suppressing the heterosexual relationship?  Is political correctness and feminism attempting to stifle heterosexual men?  Is the display of a heterosexual relationship on the cusp of extinction? Does the heterosexual man need to 'hide' his sexuality - his identity when he is in the presence of non-heteros?  

What is the view of the heterosexual man who posts in a LBGTI forum?  Do I, as a heterosexual man, have anything to offer?  My sexuality is tied to the relationships I form.  Aren't gay issues *relationship* issues, too?  If not, what is specific to the gay man that is not specific to me - unless it's all only about the 'sexual activity,' and not the relationship itself?     

Must I defend my sexuality?  Must a gay man defend his sexuality?  Why is one singled out over the other for a 'specific' forum?   Who really cares if the relationship is MM, MF, or FF.  Shouldn't it be about issues we face in relationships: treating one another with kindness, humor, reasoning, compassion, compromise; and discussing the issues that lead to unhealthy types of relationships, or how to build better relationships?

 

 

My goodness.  Such angst.  And so peculiarly unnecessary, given that we do not, in fact, even have an LGBTI-only forum here.

 

Should we have such a forum?  I've no idea, really.  I can see advantages and disadvantages, but I think I'd leave that decision up to members of that community, who seem, unsurprisingly, to be split on the issue themselves.

I do, however, want you to know that I feel your pain, as a hapless heterosexual man, adrift and unloved in a new and alien world that seems to have been redesigned by and for gays, feminists and the "politically correct."

In an effort to provide some consolation to you, I offer you the following questions.  Answer them honestly, and perhaps you will be able to bear up under the tide of oppression a little better.

 

  • How many young people have to hide their heterosexuality for fear of being ostracized, ridiculed, thrown out of their home, or beaten up?
  • How many teens have been driven into deep depression or even suicide because of the bullying motivated by a hatred and fear of heterosexuality?
  • Have you heard much about gangs of thugs wandering the streets engaging in "hetero-bashing"?
  • How many loving and monogamous heterosexual couples are deprived of the right to a legal and equal partnership under the law?  Do you know of many places that refuse to recognize heterosexual marriages?
  • How many heterosexuals are kept from the hospital bedsides of their ailing partners because the state doesn't recognize their right to be there?
  • How many adoption agencies are hesitant, or even refuse to allow heterosexual couples to adopt?
  • In how many developing nations is it an offence, punishable by death, to be heterosexual?

 

I could go on, I suppose, but I don't want to cheer you up TOO much.

One day, Storm, we will live in a culture where one's sexuality matters as much, legally and socially speaking, as one's eye colour.  A society where heterosexual and homosexual become nearly meaningless distinctions, for the simple reason that no one will blink an eye about the choice of one or the other.

Until that day, Storm, I'll just have to hope that you can be strong.  I'm sure that your day, and that of all heterosexuals everywhere, will come at last.

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I have over 40 bottles of varying spices and flavorings in my cupboard. But when I make deviled eggs, I always grab the Paprika for that finishing touch. Yet, I don't feel that the Paprika is being oppressed in the least. (And so far, it hasn't complained either.)

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it was a great idea to name this section of the forum Identity and Relationships to not discriminate against anyone because of their sexual orientation (even heterosexuals).

heterosexuals are not being discriminated here so you can feel safe.

 

ill answer your questions

"Is the political correctness in today's world suppressing the heterosexual relationship?"

not at all, its only making the other sexual orientations more accepatble by the majority.

"Is political correctness and feminism attempting to stifle heterosexual men?"

no, feminism is not about being a lesbian, is about having the rights that they deserve and been taken away by males thru history, and political correctness.. thats just another way to speak

"Is the display of a heterosexual relationship on the cusp of extinction?"

if it were in the cusp of extinction the displays would have to be less than 50%

"Does the heterosexual man need to 'hide' his sexuality - his identity when he is in the presence of non-heteros?"

unless the non-heteros present a big danger to the heterosexual, i dont see any need to hide it

"What is the view of the heterosexual man who posts in a LBGTI forum?"

i guess everybody will see him different

"Do I, as a heterosexual man, have anything to offer?"

your masculinity to heterosexual girls

"My sexuality is tied to the relationships I form.  Aren't gay issues *relationship* issues, too?"

not all gay issues are about relationships, some have issues with their surrounding society

"If not, what is specific to the gay man that is not specific to me - unless it's all only about the 'sexual activity,' and not the relationship itself?"

the attraction to people that are of the same sex. some may find a person attractive beceause is beautiful, some because is sexy.

"Must I defend my sexuality?"

thats your choice. if you are being attacked because of your sexuality you can opt to defend it or not.

"Must a gay man defend his sexuality?"

its his choice also

"Why is one singled out over the other for a 'specific' forum?"

because non-hetero people have been very singled out by heteros, but i agree that a forum about sexuality should be HLBGTI and all the initials of all kinds of sexual orientation

"Who really cares if the relationship is MM, MF, or FF.  Shouldn't it be about issues we face in relationships: treating one another with kindness, humor, reasoning, compassion, compromise; and discussing the issues that lead to unhealthy types of relationships, or how to build better relationships?"

yes, thats why i think it was a good option to call it Identity and Relationships

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Perrie Juran wrote:

Yes, there really are girls out there who are into swinging from the chandeliers with bisexual furry skunks.  And in public no less!!!!!

 

 

I prefer my skunks shaved, TYVM.

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Darrius Gothly wrote:

I have over 40 bottles of varying spices and flavorings in my cupboard. But when I make deviled eggs, I always grab the Paprika for that finishing touch. Yet, I don't feel that the Paprika is being oppressed in the least. (And so far, it hasn't complained either.)

Dibs on one. That would be TWO halves, understand.

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Dillon Levenque wrote:


Darrius Gothly wrote:

I have over 40 bottles of varying spices and flavorings in my cupboard. But when I make deviled eggs, I always grab the Paprika for that finishing touch. Yet, I don't feel that the Paprika is being oppressed in the least. (And so far, it hasn't complained either.)

Dibs on one. That would be TWO halves, understand.

 

If ya ain't helpin' .. ya ain't eatin' ...

/me hands Dillon a fresh hard-boiled egg ... and grins

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Deviled eggs? I have a hate relationship with eggs. That's it, I'll have to cut ties with both of you. Rats. I liked you both so well.  :smileywink:

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Quinn Morani wrote:

Deviled eggs? I have a hate relationship with eggs. That's it, I'll have to cut ties with both of you. Rats. I liked you both so well.  :smileywink:

 

*GASP* An Egg-Hater?!? OMG .. how did you sneak in here? What horrible twist of life could possibly have turned you so evil, so spiteful .. so demented as to hate such innocent, organically beautiful and elegantly designed calcium enclosed, protein packed wonders as eggs?

/me hands Dillon another couple of unshelled beauties .. "keep a crackin .. we seem to be eatin' as fast as we're shellin' ..."

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I have a vague recollection of loving fried eggs mashed with a fork when I was very small. I have no idea what happened to turn me into an egg-hater, but I can't even stand the smell of them. On the bright side, that leaves more for everyone else. You and Dillon can split my share.

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Quinn Morani wrote:

I have a vague recollection of loving fried eggs mashed with a fork when I was very small. I have no idea what happened to turn me into an egg-hater, but I can't even stand the smell of them. On the bright side, that leaves more for everyone else. You and Dillon can split my share.

 

Well .. okay .. I guess it's only fair. I'm allergic to chocolate, so you can have my share of the chocolate ....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

eggs.

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Dillon Levenque wrote:

At the risk of missing that this was one of your rp-style posts...<snip>

Miss or not miss - don't assume anything.  I know what sub-forum I am posting to. 

 

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Scylla Rhiadra wrote:

 <snip>

I could go on, I suppose, but I don't want to cheer you up TOO much.

One day, Storm, we will live in a culture where one's sexuality matters as much, legally and socially speaking, as one's eye colour.  A society where heterosexual and homosexual become nearly meaningless distinctions, for the simple reason that no one will blink an eye about the choice of one or the other.

Until that day, Storm, I'll just have to hope that you can be strong.  I'm sure that your day, and that of all heterosexuals everywhere, will come at last.

 

Your response is a case in point.  I wrote this OP because of your question to me yesterday regarding my comfort level in the new forum - because my OP was about pets?!  The description suggests that posters use this subforum to discuss identity and relationships in SL.  Many purchase prim pets for various reasons.  That the thread took a turn toward RL pets was natural and expected.  That your interpretation of the forum description is more restrictive than is mine does not mean that the OP on pets does not belong here.

Now,  I write about heterosexual men and you, a self-proclaimed feminist, tells me I am angst ridden.  You read too much emotion in my OP.   My questions were intentionally provocative but not 'angst ridden'.   I read the preface to your series of questions as not really taking the OP seriously but that is OK.

You answer my questions with more questions - but not about heterosexuality, but how often I witness the oppression of heterosexuals compared to non.  I do not feel oppressed - I ask questions.   I do realize we are talking history here as the decision was wisely made not to have a separate and private forum for LBTGI residents.  I point to your OP on the matter where you stated it is up to members of *that* community whether or not to have such a forum - I thought it was up to all of us here.  By your own words you are not a 'member' of that community but you felt the need to start an OP asking what should such a LGTBI forum look like.  With a willingness to pass off to someone more qualified - when one stepped up to the plate that was qualified enough.  I am a qualified enough to speak about  heterosexuality - I stepped up to the plate to ask questions regarding the evolving 'place' of heterosexuals in society.  Are you claiming more qualifications than I in this area?  I think not.

You seem to have plenty of empathy for situations where non-hetros have experienced trials in life.  Do not tell me I never knew the horrors of childhood bullying, that a hetero couple over a certain age does not need to resort to other countries to adopt children,  that a hetero couple (unmarried) must not also argue a case for being by that same bedside?  It is you that trivialized the needs of the gay community by stepping in to speak for them.  I see it as another form of activism for the sake of being an activist.   I am not 'threatened or oppressed' by the gay community in SL or RL.

I think the LGTBI community will survive without a separate forum - I think I can survive without one as well.  We can all talk about issues right here - I can not participate in the sexual activity issues relating to the gay man.  I will not participate in the sexual activities of the straight man either - I will discuss relationships.  

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Quinn Morani wrote:

Deviled eggs? I have a hate relationship with eggs. That's it, I'll have to cut ties with both of you. Rats. I liked you both so well.  :smileywink:

This post is less than 140bytes, don't you think it is more suited for twitter?

 

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