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Why is it so difficult to make friends?


Highflyer910
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Do you suppose there are people in RL who say "RL is the easiest way to make friends and I wonder, why do people go to SL, hoping to make friends?"

I think SL is an easier way to make friends for some, but there are many ways to do that. People posting here is just one of them. I welcome their efforts and wish them the best of luck.

ETA: There are logistical advantages to advertising for friends in the forum. In-world, you must be in the right place at the right time to get anyone's attention. Here, you've got a big, blank, persistent page on which to write, and a substantial (in comparison to any in-world venue) audience.

Edited by Madelaine McMasters
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28 minutes ago, Highflyer910 said:

I wonder, why people post here

  1. Shy. 
  2. Introverted (not the same thing as #1)
  3. Not into strip clubs, info hubs or bot bars.
  4. Having a hard time cracking the cliques where actual people are.
  5. Able to reach more people across time zones on the forums rather than who is on that moment when asking in group chat.
  6. Who says they are not also looking when in world?  Which leads too ...
  7. Easier to find time to chat on the forums throughout the day while at work than it is to be in world during limited time after work.
  8. Why not? You just did :D

 

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I see. I was just confused because I'm introvert and shy a bit and the forum is more kind of RL for me and more difficult than SL, I'm more open there - weird I know.. 

But Rhonda's post makes me think that Forum is much better because of time zone and limited time problems...

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3 minutes ago, Highflyer910 said:

I see. I was just confused because I'm introvert and shy a bit and the forum is more kind of RL for me and more difficult than SL, I'm more open there - weird I know.. 

But Rhonda's post makes me think that Forum is much better because of time zone and limited time problems...

You're not the only shy introvert here, Highflyer!...

 

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1 hour ago, Highflyer910 said:

I see. I was just confused because I'm introvert and shy a bit and the forum is more kind of RL for me and more difficult than SL, I'm more open there - weird I know.. 

But Rhonda's post makes me think that Forum is much better because of time zone and limited time problems...

It isn't necessarily better, just a different way to get the goal accomplished. Say you want to catch fish, you can sit on the bank fishing, or you can set out fish traps, or you can take a small amount of time from sitting on the bank to set fish, traps then go back to the bank and then you have both methods working for you at once, why not do both, it does not matter which is better if you can do both.

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Over the years my best SL friends came from forums. Some I haven't even bumped into in SL at all, yet we can still talk on forums like good friends. I even have RL friends that were SL forum friends first. If a forum is run like the old SL forums where general conversation was OK (before the dark times) it can be great for building friendships. It is easier for some of us to relate to others in a forum. Though being IN SL is the best policy when possible. 

Edited by Macphisto Angelus
added "it can be great for building friendships"
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4 hours ago, Highflyer910 said:

SL is the easiest way to make friends and I wonder, why people post here, hoping to make friends? 

Like Mac said above, some of my best friends in SL started out as forum friends that I later met inworld. I met my about-to-be husband on the original Just Ignore and Let This One Die thread. It does take time to build up friendships and the trust that goes with it but this is true no matter where you meet someone.  Many people I met here and inworld are very good real life friends now.

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